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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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happyannie Depressed and Alone
  • replies: 6

Hi I didnt have anyone to talk to so I thought I would write my thoughts down it usually helps some what. My carer has the week off and he is such a big part of my life and does so much with me and for me, but most importantly he listens. While hes a... View more

Hi I didnt have anyone to talk to so I thought I would write my thoughts down it usually helps some what. My carer has the week off and he is such a big part of my life and does so much with me and for me, but most importantly he listens. While hes away my daughters my carer but she works full time so Im feeling very isolated, I dont have people I can call upon and I woke up today very depressed, not knowing what to do with myself, I dont leave the house except to go to Doctors appointments thats my agoraphobia, which I hate. My mind is taking over me, my thought process is not good at the moment, some dark thoughts creeping in. Anyway as usual thank you beyond blue for listening to me and for giving me a safe place to vent Thanx Annie

woozy Honestly don't know what to do
  • replies: 9

How do you function on a depressive episode? I'm a uni student and i have so much to do. I'm trying, I really am, I've been taking my meds I've been scheduling therapy sessions. It all feels like I'm faking my way through "recovery". But I do it beca... View more

How do you function on a depressive episode? I'm a uni student and i have so much to do. I'm trying, I really am, I've been taking my meds I've been scheduling therapy sessions. It all feels like I'm faking my way through "recovery". But I do it because it's my responsibility to, as I'm an international student here in Australia on a scholarship. The pressure to go on and push all that that's bothering me to the back of my mind is immense. I cannot have an honest conversation with a therapist for fear of them not understanding me. I understand their perspective but I need someone to understand my perspective as well. I feel so disconnected from "reality". Constantly questioning everything and being sucked into this vortex of confusion and paranoia. I feel like giving in to it and completely withdrawing myself. But I keep going on because as long as I'm here and given this opportunity I cannot be that selfish. I did give in to the selfishness once. Ended up in the psych ward. I cannot ever go back there again. So I need to get through at least this year. But I keep falling back into dark days where I'm useless and barely functioning and I can't afford to have these days because uni does not stop for anyone. I don't know what to do.

wildcats21 I hope this will help at least a little
  • replies: 2

Hi guys, this is gonna be a long one Basically I had taken a week off work during the new year (its my first job and it is full time and not very satisfying as it is a desk job.) I found that getting through the day wasn't a big deal before I started... View more

Hi guys, this is gonna be a long one Basically I had taken a week off work during the new year (its my first job and it is full time and not very satisfying as it is a desk job.) I found that getting through the day wasn't a big deal before I started feeling depressed and anxious about an incident that happened with my boyfriend of almost 3 years during the a holiday week I had taken off. We had a weird argument about something so incredibly small. I am very stubborn yet also very passive when I'm annoyed. I get annoyed over the smallest things but when asked to explain why I am I feel silly because I know how stupid they sound and how insignificant it really is which then makes me feel worse. Anyway this fight caused us to basically break up but then get back together because when I told my parents why we broke up they made me realise that there was no actual real reason as to why we broke up since we were completely fine before this incident. We also see each other everyday. Which I didn't think was a problem at all before all of this. We both work during the day and while mine is basically 9-5, he sometimes works half days so he has time for the gym and footy training etc. in my eyes we were getting the time we needed to sustain a healthy relationship. In my own time I did what I wanted to do as did he. We talked about what happened and then decided to just try and work it out but being in each other's company felt a bit forced like something wasn't right and then that's when we broke up^ basically what I touched on up there. AKA we are still together now that's when this all started. He is the most amazing, selfless and generous person and I don't want to be nor can I think of being with anyone else but post all of this I have been feeling incredibly anxious and depressed and wake up every morning with all these over thinking thoughts about do I actually love him anymore? I feel like I can't feel love even though I know I love him because if I didn't I wouldn't be fighting for us this much. I am seeing a psychologist and have just recently been put on medication. I haven't been able to go to work without crying and I haven't been able to go to work more often than not. My boyfriend promises he's here for me forever ¬ going anywhere but why do I feel like this is just too good to be true? this has made me start to question everything about myself, what do I even like? I have no future, no passion or interest for anything. It just all gets scary

KittyKc Damaged
  • replies: 4

Hi.. This is my first post so I am not too sure what to say so here goes.. I have depression - ive been depressed and on medication since very young age, only just recently I've stopped taking my meds as it makes me feel completely yuck (tried multip... View more

Hi.. This is my first post so I am not too sure what to say so here goes.. I have depression - ive been depressed and on medication since very young age, only just recently I've stopped taking my meds as it makes me feel completely yuck (tried multiple different anti-depressants through out the last 12 years) I know I need to go to the doctors and talk about new medication or something else. I just feel like it's over for me, I have nothing to show for myself other than debt and no motivation in life... I am currently unemployed, I apply for atleast 5-10 jobs a day if possible but that's only when I can connect to WiFi as my phone has been cut off, lucky I can still receive incoming calls just in case an employer does contact me (which no luck yet) Some people ask me what happened to me that had caused me to be so depressed.. but there is no answer because my childhood was great, no traumatic experiences, perfect caring parents and siblings, I always had friends and enjoyed being outside in the sun. by the age of 11 I was already noticing how I'm changing - how I'm over feeling/thinking some things, stopped being so bubbly and energetic. Once high school hit it was just a big whirlwind of negative thoughts and actions I only lasted 2 and half years in high school because I couldn't take the bullying, I stopped paying attention and just wagged every day possible. Once I left school I worked at woolworths and stayed there for roughly 3 years, I gained new friends and had some sort of enjoyment in life but that didn't last long, I met this girl and thought I feel I love. long story short I was introduced to hard drugs and the world drugs have created, so what little life I did create for myself I only destroyed it myself again. 4 years that went on and the metal abuse I got was something evil, I feel evil sometimes knowing how my life has been. I left her and met this guy and at first my life was moving forward again, I was working and living out of home and just enjoying the little things, then one day I just felt sick like anxiety attack of the century and I went home sick from work to find out my boyfriend cheated on me with out housemate and she was pregnant with his baby...... I died - well it felt like I died. I didn't move for 3 weeks and lost about 20 kilos. But I was silly and went back to him 6 months later(will explain another time)Right now I'm extremely unhappy and lost, no job - no money - no friends just feels like I have no life

Catgonemad Feeling blah!
  • replies: 6

Hello Newbie here. As the title says, feeling blah. As well as being depressed, I'm suffering extreme insomnia and anxiety. I feel so disconnected from the world right now - I'm constantly surrounded by people but feel alone and within minutes the so... View more

Hello Newbie here. As the title says, feeling blah. As well as being depressed, I'm suffering extreme insomnia and anxiety. I feel so disconnected from the world right now - I'm constantly surrounded by people but feel alone and within minutes the sound of someone breathing (or doing anything) annoys the crap out of me. I've lost all interest in everything and just running on auto pilot. Generally feel like everything and everyone is soul destroying. No idea about the point of this post is lol but it's getting late and while I'm exhausted I can't sleep and soon it will be just me alone with my thoughts.

Jaimi17 I don't know what to do anymore
  • replies: 3

I've been feeling so low for so long that it doesn't feel possible to ever be happy again. Its been over two years since a traumatic event happened where my entire world changed over night. I can't stop thinking about it, I relive it all the time. I'... View more

I've been feeling so low for so long that it doesn't feel possible to ever be happy again. Its been over two years since a traumatic event happened where my entire world changed over night. I can't stop thinking about it, I relive it all the time. I'm tired, I feel so defeated. I have tried opening up to friends and family but they shut me down or don't respond. Most my friends left me at the same time this all happened.. It use to be my family that made me happy but now im constantly lying saying im ok just to avoid the lectures that "I should be over it by now" or the "you'll be ok". I feel like im trying to piece the puzzle of my life back together but the pieces don't fit anymore. Happiness is very short lived and even my favourite things don't make me happy anymore. I have tried counselling with 3 different people.. money is tight so its been another stress.. I have been on medication but my last doctor took me off it because i got worse and couldnt control my tears. Does anyone have any advice on what to do because I can't keep doing this alone. My heart is so heavy all the time. I just want to be happy again but I don't know how to fix it anymore and I feel like no one cares.

TJ21 I'm not sure..
  • replies: 2

Hi Everyone, Just after some guidance. Over the last year or so I have noticed myself becoming slowly more emotional. I find it extremely hard to be alone, and if I am alone I often cry from loneliness. I have a lot of friends and am very social, and... View more

Hi Everyone, Just after some guidance. Over the last year or so I have noticed myself becoming slowly more emotional. I find it extremely hard to be alone, and if I am alone I often cry from loneliness. I have a lot of friends and am very social, and in these situations I am fine, however the second I am alone everything hurts again. I live with sister and her boyfriend who are expecting a baby, and I am so excited for them. I have a boyfriend of 2 years who I may not 100% trust and I am concerned this has provoked my sadness. I am definitely an over-thinker and he has never given me any reason to not trust him, I am creating scenarios in my head and I can acknowledge that. I don't know how to stop. My ex cheated on me multiple times which may be my reason for lack of trust. My father also cheated on my mother for many years. Are these feelings just the product of old wounds? I find that I talk myself into being more sad, and making the situation worse for myself. I am on the pill and have been for many years which I know can affect your hormones dramatically, however I have never had any past issues with depression on the pill. I just need to stop feeling like this and I don't know where to start. I have a history of social anxitey, but more in the sense that I don't like speaking in public professionally like at work or when I was studying. I can handle social situations well (I think?). I have found that sometimes I overcompensate and am quite extroverted to cover up some insecurities? Has anyone ever felt this way? Thanks

Rip_Curl Bipolar II and Melancholy
  • replies: 2

Hi I've been diagnosed with Bipolar 2 and Melancholy. I've been working in a Call Centre role which I thought would be good for me as I'm a caring, empathetic person. However, I'm finding that by half-way through the working week, I want to have abso... View more

Hi I've been diagnosed with Bipolar 2 and Melancholy. I've been working in a Call Centre role which I thought would be good for me as I'm a caring, empathetic person. However, I'm finding that by half-way through the working week, I want to have absolutely nothing to do with people as I'm finding the Call Centre roll incredibly emotionally and mentally draining - excessive verbal and visual stimulation as well as trying to manage my bipolar on a daily basis. It is taking a toll on my relationship with my boyfriend - he knows and feels that I'm not my usual self at the moment and is doing a lot to help out around the house. Sometimes when he has a bad day at work, he will start to order me around - not good in any case but even more so when I'm already emotionally and mentally drained. It has lead me to, on more than one occasion to 'bite back' at him by saying things like 'Don't tell me what to do!, I don't have to tell you everything!' Needless to say it compounds my already negative feelings. I guess it gets compounded by when I wanted to do a Clinical Coding Course - which is what I actually enjoy doing and doesn't leave me as drained at the end of the day - he initially said that I could and then said he would think about it and then 3 days later he said I couldn't do it. The course costs $995 and we are both working full time and can afford it. He does have a history in this relationship of being controlling. Please help. Regards

Berrelam From nothing to a major depression relapse in three days.
  • replies: 31

I should probably preface this by saying that late November I lost my best friend to a new relationship with a partner that seems possessive, and stop there, because my open opinions on her would get this post blocked. Feel free to call me Bel or Sam... View more

I should probably preface this by saying that late November I lost my best friend to a new relationship with a partner that seems possessive, and stop there, because my open opinions on her would get this post blocked. Feel free to call me Bel or Sam. They/them pronouns are fine. Three days ago is when it started. Out of the blue, I was listening to a song that reminded me of the events, and I brushed it off as a coincidence. It still felt kind of bad to have the thought/memory of losing a friend of seven years, but I figured, if he's happy, it's worth it. I'd assume he's happy, because he hasn't contacted me about him breaking it off with her. Yesterday wasn't as good. I could feel my mood slipping, slowly but surely. Like holding onto a weight that's just a little too heavy. I was reading through Tearjerker tropes (it's a hobby) and thinking that I could relate to people's experiences in video games (which is/was my main escape). The voice in your head that's the harsh truth -- can be helpful, can be hurtful -- bluntly made me remember that no, I can't. It's a long, long story. I ended that night in a depressive low I haven't been in for almost five years, then drinking myself back to happiness. Bed at 3:45 am. Then I woke up this morning. I didn't want to get out of bed. I slept another three hours, woke up, couldn't get back to sleep, stayed for half an hour before moving to Google to find anything that might help. I figured I may as well make an account here, so here I am, pouring out my feelings (or lack of) in the hope anyone can help. I don't want to eat, I don't want to drink. Saying I don't want to do anything is probably frustrating to hear, but it's true. I haven't been to a psych in thirteen years, haven't been on meds for ten. I don't want to start either again. I don't know where I'm going or what I'm looking for, in this post or in general. I honestly don't know if there's anything to do or any place to go.

Debzmites confusion reigns.........
  • replies: 1

So, I'm 36 later this year and have been thinking about a baby ALOT! I mean, the clock is ticking!! Spoke to my Psychiatrist today and he was saying that I'd come off all my meds and best be as stable as possible before getting pregnant. It just got ... View more

So, I'm 36 later this year and have been thinking about a baby ALOT! I mean, the clock is ticking!! Spoke to my Psychiatrist today and he was saying that I'd come off all my meds and best be as stable as possible before getting pregnant. It just got me thinking. Obviously the first thought was to start weening myself off my meds and what changes I can make so that I can be stable and deal with this black dog. Then I thought what if I do all this and its just not meant to happen and I don't meet someone. aaccckkkkk There was so much talk about my meds being safe during pregnancy I didn't think weening off would be needed so it's a bit scary. Sorry, I'm waffling.

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