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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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TRC92 feeling lost
  • replies: 1

HI I have had depression since my teenage years, trialing many different CBT and medications. i am 26 now and self manage my depression most of the time as i react with most medications. when i was 17 i was in a relationship with someone who i ended ... View more

HI I have had depression since my teenage years, trialing many different CBT and medications. i am 26 now and self manage my depression most of the time as i react with most medications. when i was 17 i was in a relationship with someone who i ended up getting married to. i had a not so good childhood and i seemed to have had followed that abuse with my partner. we were together for 6 years in which during that time i lost my identity. we split 3 years ago and during the time of it, it was very traumatic and emotionally abusive, to the point now where my short term memory is terrible compared to what is used to be and i forget the simplest things and sometimes even what i am doing when i am in the middle of a task. financially it has been horrible to but most of that has subsided. that is a brief over view of my history. last week i had a really bad episode, probably the worst i have had in a few months and i am struggling to get out. its like i am here but it doesnt feel that everything around me is real, and my mood changes dramatically with the smallest thing. i just feel so tired and i dont want to go back to a therapist or take medications as i dont find these helpful to me. i almost feel like the inside wants to just shut down. physically i feel ok but the rest of me doesnt. my spirit feels tired. any suggestions as to what people try to help themselves get better

Sparklemuffin Forecast: Hollow with a chance of cloud and shower
  • replies: 1

I am not entirely sure what I’m doing here. It’s hard to find an outlet for your words where they can be heard. Because when you’re feeling like I am right now, there isn’t a single word I can utter to convey these hollowness , or even a single perso... View more

I am not entirely sure what I’m doing here. It’s hard to find an outlet for your words where they can be heard. Because when you’re feeling like I am right now, there isn’t a single word I can utter to convey these hollowness , or even a single person who’d be willing to listen. Because right now, at this very moment , I am the only thing existing in this universe of mine along with it’s great big hole. No amount of music, stories or memes can fill its ache. I know I’ll be fine in the morning, I think. ‘Fine’ is probably just the mask for it. Though it might be stronger in daylight. It might hold for a day or a week or even a month. But eventually it will crumble and I’ll return to my universe of one. Even in my dark phase, I can’t use straight words to express. I need these weird images to hide behind. Who knows what my problem is. Surely not me. Maybe someone? Anyone?

Ayejay91 Depressed father dead end job
  • replies: 1

Hi guys, first time here, seeking personal experiences with child support and fatherhood. I currently work night shifts and have for 2 years and never see my child, I have recently been battling against depression and anxiety and have been spiraling ... View more

Hi guys, first time here, seeking personal experiences with child support and fatherhood. I currently work night shifts and have for 2 years and never see my child, I have recently been battling against depression and anxiety and have been spiraling down every day since. I just want to talk to someone about it all, I use to be an extrovert but lately I barely leave the house, I recently turned 27 and I look at my life compared to others my age and wonder where I went wrong with everything, I was brought up to hide emotions cause it was a weakness, which now affects my relationship with my fiancé. I snap with anger if something small and unimportant happens, I’m frustrated all the time, I’m grinding my teeth as I write this cause I don’t like help and I’m anxious over nothing!! i give kudos to all the people out there on child support that can manage to pick themselves up. I just needed to vent mostly but any personal experience and advice is appreciated

llocin 45 and have nobody
  • replies: 3

Hello, I have recently started my annual leave, normally this was a time I just immersed myself into online gaming and let the time tick by. This year I just didn't have that desire so I started going for bike rides and and listening to podcasts. It ... View more

Hello, I have recently started my annual leave, normally this was a time I just immersed myself into online gaming and let the time tick by. This year I just didn't have that desire so I started going for bike rides and and listening to podcasts. It is weird, as I don't really listen to music, but I heard a kpop group that was great so I checked out some of their stuff and it awoke feelings that I didn't know I had. This isn't some creepy 40+ year old dude watching young asian girls for kicks, it was a revelation of sorts. Watching them on Youtube I started crying at one of their songs even though I didn't understand it. I realised these are a group of talented people who have everything in front of them, they are full of joy, they are close friends, they have the World at their feet. I have none of these things. It's not a fame and fortune thing. It's that I don't have joy in my life, I have no friends. I haven't had a relationship in forever. Who would want a boyfriend that has no friends? I don't know if any of this is relevant but as the Catalyst of my discovery I though worth mentioning. Anyway I decided to reach out to two people from my past who where still in my phone, we used to work together and were pretty close but It has been years. They both messaged me very quickly and one called and we spoke for a bit and said we would catch up. I'm just not sure how to proceed. I would love to chat but I don't want to be the person who suddenly tries to force his way into others lives, especially after so long, and I don't think it is right to be using these people to try and fix my issues. It's just that I finally want friends but have no idea how to achieve that at 45, who wants to be friends with someone who has none? How do you even meet people when you don't have friend's to hang around with? My job involves weird shift work, start and finish times are different everyday and I often work weekends so I would like to rekindle these friendships before I get back to work. I'm thinking of going to see a professional to help me sort through things as I am currently a bundle of emotions instead of not caring like I did for the last 10 years. Thanks for reading and any input. I really has helped to sit down and write this out, even though i'm crying like a kid. I guess I do need to do something more. I don't know how people do this, I've read so many articulate posts, so sorry for mine.

bluewater I need support
  • replies: 3

I am waking each morning worrying about just making it through the day! I've been on medication and feel it's not working although I've made small improvements. I just hate waking up seeing the sunlight and thinking here we go again. No suicide ideat... View more

I am waking each morning worrying about just making it through the day! I've been on medication and feel it's not working although I've made small improvements. I just hate waking up seeing the sunlight and thinking here we go again. No suicide ideation at all but sick and tired of being sick and tired! Also tapering from anxiety medication. I also have health and GAD anxiety on top of the depression and medical professionals involved. I'm not into craft or arts or anything. Prior to all this I enjoyed going out even though I lived a little reckless! I'm just over waking each morning feeling like this even though I'm using all my CBT tools. Ahhhhhh

creggz New on here! Creative girl recently diagnosed
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone! My name's Naomi. I've lived with anxiety and depression for years but just recently been diagnosed with (and have probably always had) Borderline Personality Disorder. Would be nice to meet and connect with people who experience what I d... View more

Hi everyone! My name's Naomi. I've lived with anxiety and depression for years but just recently been diagnosed with (and have probably always had) Borderline Personality Disorder. Would be nice to meet and connect with people who experience what I do. Even though I share a lot with others I still feel very alone sometimes, especially since I'm recently diagnosed with BPD, and I'd love to have a community of people I'm not 'running' so to speak. I look forward to meeting people on here Have a good evening everyone

Josh021 First time really seeking help for depression.
  • replies: 8

Hi this is my first post on here, i'm not sure if i'm meant to be introducing myself or not. This is a little bit confronting for me as i have difficulties discussing this at all. But I really feel like i need to be able to share this & maybe have so... View more

Hi this is my first post on here, i'm not sure if i'm meant to be introducing myself or not. This is a little bit confronting for me as i have difficulties discussing this at all. But I really feel like i need to be able to share this & maybe have somebody who cares enough to listen. I feel like it could do me a lot of good. To introduce myself a little, I've struggled with depression & nightmares for 6 years now, the year that I graduated from high school I began to feel extremely isolated. I had no one to talk to, I had no idea at all what i wanted in life & no real life skills. Without any idea what i wanted in life I kind of gambled on an interest i had at the time & jumped into a fitness Degree. This unfortunately turned out to be a horrible idea as my problems with Social skills really hit hard & inevitably caused me to fail leaving me $3,600 in debt with an entire year wasted with nothing to show for it as well as angering my parents enough that i was kicked out of home. For the next 2 years i bounced between degrading casual jobs, with no friends or family to support me what so ever. 3 years after graduating I finally made another friend, who later went on to become my girlfriend. Having her in my life led me to so much advancement in my life, I got an enjoyable well paying job, paid my debt back to my parents & made amends & overall felt significantly happier. Though for the past year since then I started to feel that same old sadness coming back, looking at my life I'd think to myself none of this is what i want. This was true for almost everything. However i told myself i was okay because I thought I at least had a partner for life & that was 1 thing that made me genuinely happy. Anyways, 3 months ago we broke up & this led us to stop talking as a whole. In that time i hadn't made any more friends & with her gone that 1 shred of happiness that remained is gone. I'm now stuck in what i feel to be a worst position than I ever have been before, I do not enjoy any of my previous hobbies anymore, I go to work & honestly feel like i struggle to not break down while I'm there now & every night i go to bed unable to sleep for hours because i am unable to stop thinking about how much i miss her. Im not particularly sure how to wrap this up. But for all those who have read & might have say something to say, thankyou so much for giving me your time. I apologise for how incoherent this probably comes across to read.

Santana feeling that no one likes me at work
  • replies: 3

Hi guys, I am feeling increasingly anxious about not being liked at work. I know that depression can cloud our thinking but I also think I am quite perceptive so I am not sure if I am right to feel this way or not. I am middle aged and for a while I ... View more

Hi guys, I am feeling increasingly anxious about not being liked at work. I know that depression can cloud our thinking but I also think I am quite perceptive so I am not sure if I am right to feel this way or not. I am middle aged and for a while I was mostly working with younger people (although now it's more of a mixed team), and finding it difficult to connect. I feel like I always say the wrong thing, even when I am genuinely trying to be nice, I feel that people think I am being patronising. One particular colleague is super smart and is always praised by our manager and I honestly feel inadequate. He is really nice and helpful to everyone but when I ask for help he either doesn't help me or says things like : 'Oh really, you don't know that?' in an arrogant tone. Now I feel like I am constantly replaying what I say in my head and worrying about what other people must be thinking. My anxiety is on the rise and depression usually follows. I don't know what to do. I am on medication but it's only ever just taken the edge off. I don't think I have truly felt happy and well for the longest time. I also see a counsellor and we have tried CBT and mindfulness. Just right now I am really struggling and I need to know if other people experience this sort of thing and how they cope. I'd be grateful for any thoughts on this thanks.

Making_it_right Depressed friend leaves depressed friend.
  • replies: 4

I am new to this, but I am struggling. My dear friend, who is in a deep state of depression, just asked me to no longer communicate with him because he feels it is imperative that he singularly focus on a new relationship with someone he met and fell... View more

I am new to this, but I am struggling. My dear friend, who is in a deep state of depression, just asked me to no longer communicate with him because he feels it is imperative that he singularly focus on a new relationship with someone he met and fell deeply in love with. He says that he is not able to have any friendship while he focuses on trying to make this work. We have been friends for many years, and there is a great amount of trust and respect between us, but I am not certain what to do, or what to expect, if anything, from this relationship going forward. he has had ups and downs over the course of our friendship, but he was seriously suffering for the last year. He has never found any clinician who he has been able to work with, and he is not taking any medication that I am aware of. I want to think that this is great news for him, and that he has found a partner who can help him, but I want to better understand if this is any sort of warning sign. I believe that I am one of the few, if not the only person in his life who is aware of what is going on, and I was not able to help him much. I think that out of respect, I want to honor his request, but I just don't know if this is what I should be doing. Is it reasonable for me to think that it is a positive step forward for him to suddenly fall deeply in love when he is clinically depressed without treatment? He was very clear in his request for no more communication of any kind from me. He said that he needed some sort of finality with me (we are only friends as mutually agreed upon), so that he could singularly focus himself on this new relationship. He said that this woman has been so directly good for him, and that she continues to be, every day. It sounds like this could be just what he needs. Since I was not able to really help him, and she seems to be able to, is it safe for me to leave it at that? There was no upset or bad moment (he was mostly sad and reserved, but there were no emotional outbursts or anger at that time) between us when I saw him last a few weeks ago, so I figure that if all is as he says, this is a good thing. I figure that if he needs to reach out to me, we have been friends long enough for him to know that he could do that. Does this sound reasonable?

Lou88 Nothing is getting better
  • replies: 2

I have been struggling with anxiety for a while, and it’s getting worse & I’m very depressed. I’m getting help by seeing a counsellor each fortnight but it doesn’t seem to be helping and I feel like I’m spiraling out of control. I recently had a work... View more

I have been struggling with anxiety for a while, and it’s getting worse & I’m very depressed. I’m getting help by seeing a counsellor each fortnight but it doesn’t seem to be helping and I feel like I’m spiraling out of control. I recently had a work event & was internally upset at my best friend of 2.5 years (work mate) for spending more time with other girls, because I felt un-cool and not good enough for her (something I have been feeling for a while, due to anxiety). I ended up unfollowing her on Instagram when I shouldn’t have. She found out & told me since that these incidents happen too often (I have had anxiety before and unintentionally lashed out when I shouldn’t have - I never mean to and regret it so much). She said that she doesn’t know how to help me, and that I need help but she doesn’t think we can be friends anymore. My depression has got worse over the weekend, to the point where I won’t go into work tomorrow because I won’t be able to focus. I’m so upset about losing a friend and I feel like my world is coming to an end - I relied on her so much. I’m having some really dark thoughts & feel like the worst person in the world to lose such a beautiful friend when I never meant to. One work friend is really concerned about me and told me that she wants to tell someone at work so I can take some time off. I know that is probably a good idea, but I wouldn’t want to take time off unless I could see my parents and stay with them (they live overseas & I live with flatmates). However my parents are going on a 5 week holiday across the world on Wednesday, something that they deserve so much and I don’t want to take that away from them. My work friend said that my parents would come to see me over their trip, as they’d regret it if something happened to me while they’re gone (my parents know how I’m feeling and are very concerned). However I feel terrible ruining their holiday and the thought of doing that is making it even worse, even though I know I probably have to. I don’t have many friends and I don’t know what to do. I feel like my life is spiralling out of control. I need some help.

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