CARING 24/7 FOR MY ELDERLY MOTHER

[AQUA69]

Hi. I am a 24/7 carer for my 81yo mum who has multiple physical problems and is now getting some kind of dementia the last 2years which has not official been diagnosed. She also suffers fecal incontinence at many times the last few years.

I have been her carer 24/7 for over 5 years now and for 5 years previous to that where i would visit a few weeks at a time and return to my unit but eventually i was here so much i moved in with her. Im a 49yo male and get zero support from my family.

Ive always suffered depression and anxiety but the last 2or 3 years it has taken over my life as has the caring for mum.

Id just like to know if there is anyone else in a simmiliar situation ?

Regards AQUA.

[Paullus]

Hello AQUA ... I pretty much exist in the same world you do. I care 24/7 for my Mum (96) and deal with my anxiety and depression. Some days I'm glad I do care for her as I mighten get out of bed. Mum is totally dependent on me and has a wish to die at home, the palliative care team has been engaged but Mum's not ready to go yet she says. I live in a small country town where the support is exceptional, doctor does house calls, nurses come 3 times a week for hygiene etc. I do manage to get out periodically but am basically house bound. So I really do understand your situation. My life is on hold too. I wish you well.

[AQUA69]

Hi

Thanks for replying Paullus.

That must be hard to deal with.

Regards AQUA

[geoff]

hello AQUA, welcome.

What you need to do is to get your mum diagnosed by her doctor, then they will make the decision whether or not she should be admitted into a nursing home, this unfortunately needs to happen.

If your depression and anxiety have increased for the past few years possibly because you are looking after your mother with these problems then you need to get assistance yourself by contacting your own doctor.

They may prescribe medication and refer you to a psychologist, but ask them about the mental health plan, which entitles you to 10 free visits.

I have looked after a chap who was becoming incapable of being able to go to the loo and his walking was restricted, eventually I had to ring for an ambulance who took him to a hospital and then into a nursing home. Geoff.