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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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bf90 timing is everything
  • replies: 1

Hi, Haven't had the best of weeks and it lately feels this is all my life is. Had a cold recently and after visiting my GP i don't feel any better, was prescribed antibiotics and i don't feel that better a week later. the other reason i went was to s... View more

Hi, Haven't had the best of weeks and it lately feels this is all my life is. Had a cold recently and after visiting my GP i don't feel any better, was prescribed antibiotics and i don't feel that better a week later. the other reason i went was to speak about talking to a counselor or someone to talk to. Been feeling depressed and more than anything just sad. i'm not in a place in life i want to be - unemployed at 31 and just not feeling happy in life. I understand it's a natural feeling to be depressed about not working but this feels different. making it worse is knowing Christmas is weeks away and the likely reality is that i won't be working before the year is out. I'm tired of the endless cycle of applying for work i'll never get, feeling depressed about not working and just feeling sad. I'm trying to help myself by starting to do exercise, eating better and having a positive attitude - it's easier said than done though. I'm still waiting to hear back from the counselor i called so hopefully once i have a chat that may help me. I'm just over feeling sad and depressed

SPOONO Why I'm Here, or a newbies guide to getting depression and what I did to relieve it.
  • replies: 4

I was at work when the foreman drove in too fast after forgetting he'd had me get the apprentices to wash the painted garage floor with degreaser. He used his 4wd and my legs to break the tyre of car I was working on from the rim of wheel. My wife wa... View more

I was at work when the foreman drove in too fast after forgetting he'd had me get the apprentices to wash the painted garage floor with degreaser. He used his 4wd and my legs to break the tyre of car I was working on from the rim of wheel. My wife was at home cleaning up the house for sale as we'd purchased a new one up bush. A good way to escape the '89 interest rate of 23%. Wife had to drive 50km to visit me after busting gut working while pregnant and looking after two toddlers. This made me particularly popular and began to appear to her like I was away on holidays while she did all the work. A couple of my mates and me in plaster up to the groin took our worldly possessions to the new place, wife and kids moved up while I went back on holiday in rehab hospital. The day I was to be released the surgeons took a look, said bone graft. Sent me to another hospital, it was loose ligaments; sent me off to catch up with wife and kids in absolute agony. 'sign of weakness???' Most of the hillbillies in the town thought so and I suffered, took loads of crap to try to deal with pain and got depressed. When I got out of psychiatric hospital where I had been diagnosed with hep C, no doubt in my mind a result of the operations on my legs. The townsfolk with open friendly arms banned me from all eating, food and drink places. Kindly offering to let me drink stubbies only; in the bar which cleared when I tried. Ran home to mum, forgot she'd paid out a mortgage I had cos I was so screwed up and lost my 5 acres of land in that horrid town. The lands now worth close to $500,000 but banks only have to keep records for 7 years, I'm screwed. Now friction with Mum over the land, wife divorced me cos scared of hep C. She didn't notice she hadn't picked it up off me in 22yrs marriage. And that is how I got depressed. Is it an illness?? It is when all the stuff ups go around and around like a CD jumping from one track to another with no solutions. We know we aren't weak. Some think we want to have some quack fry our brains with electricity, we know its cos we're desperate to get rid of the CD, most people think we're forced to do it as punishment for being messed up. I won't let them do it to me, though I'm tempted at times. Best method to shut up the CD was by letting it all out in the mainstream, not bottling it up; HAPPY FOR FIRST TIME IN MONTHS, Thanks so much to the wise psychologist I didn't even notice him tell me. WOW!!!

Dolphin45 Daze all the time
  • replies: 2

Hi I would like to ask if anyone has experienced feeling as if in a daze a lot? I am on medication and have been for the past 2 years. I tend to forget things such as one time I left a saucepan on the stove top, left pumpkin boiling far too long; or ... View more

Hi I would like to ask if anyone has experienced feeling as if in a daze a lot? I am on medication and have been for the past 2 years. I tend to forget things such as one time I left a saucepan on the stove top, left pumpkin boiling far too long; or having a conversation with a friend then sometime later I don't remember specific things we talked about; feel like as if I am in a daze a lot. I tried to explain to my GP but she wants to upped the dosage which I think it'll make things worse. I don't process well nor grasp things as normal people do. Is it the medication or me?

Penryn Relapse Fears
  • replies: 4

Hi My name is Emily. I had my depression episode in 2015. It is now 2018 and it's been almost 3 years since my last episode. My fear of relapsing is eating away at me : Everyday is rooted in control. If I'm in control I won't relapse. I watched over ... View more

Hi My name is Emily. I had my depression episode in 2015. It is now 2018 and it's been almost 3 years since my last episode. My fear of relapsing is eating away at me : Everyday is rooted in control. If I'm in control I won't relapse. I watched over my tv limit today, it is racking me with paranoia. It makes me physically sick to think I could relapse into depression . I shouldn't have watched more than my limit but always being in control it's exhausting #Phobia I am just so terrified, if I relax, even for just a few hours, I'll relapse. I am over being afraid, I just want to live life without being controlled by this fear

Chili_girl So so lonely
  • replies: 8

Hi I’ve just been diagnosed with Adjustment Disorder adding to the depression and anxiety I already struggle with daily, all of this is making me feel less an less like the strong woman I once was. The last 5+ years I’ve been stripped of everything m... View more

Hi I’ve just been diagnosed with Adjustment Disorder adding to the depression and anxiety I already struggle with daily, all of this is making me feel less an less like the strong woman I once was. The last 5+ years I’ve been stripped of everything material and maternal that keep my alive an functioning. Now I’m a skeleton of emotion, bent twisted and very untrusting of all, I’ve worked so hard to hold on to what’s left of my life, I’m sure there is more for me to enjoy, My specialist has prescribed medication, not a direction I’m keen to follow, I have no support and my only friends are those I work with (don’t really want to share to much with them) so so many questions and I know I’m not alone but I sure feel like the only person alive. ???? Xxx

Evie81 Hypomanic - do I really need to see my pdoc aka Debby Downer?
  • replies: 4

So after having been depressed for ages, questioning my diagnosis as I’ve been eluded of high episodes for so long; here she finally is! The long awaited upside! I don’t generally get euphoric highs, usually more the irritable ones with a pang of eup... View more

So after having been depressed for ages, questioning my diagnosis as I’ve been eluded of high episodes for so long; here she finally is! The long awaited upside! I don’t generally get euphoric highs, usually more the irritable ones with a pang of euphoria throw in. This one is different, I’m high as a kite with a pang of irritability thrown in. This mostly when my husband doesn’t understand that I’m on a mission and stands in my way. I’ve been up since 1:30 and it’s been a ball. Dancing around the living room to my favourite songs. The house is sparkling. I cleaned everything from my spice bottles to my mop, not cleaning *with* the mop but actually giving the mop a scrub down with gumption. Beautiful outcome I might add. All those task that I didn’t do for 6 months; consider them done! Fair enough my husband’s breathing is annoying me, he’s been under clear instructions not to touch me, and the outside world seems a bother but I feel like a million bucks. I feel sexually invigorated (but not with my husband as he does everything wrong), I feel light and free and not unimportant anxiety-less. My husband came out at 4:00 being a Debby Downer saying I need to see my psych. I do like my psych but I know he’ll also be a buzz kill. Here, have some pills to make you feel less good. “Sure I’ll have them” - said no one ever. I do know I need to see him but also feel entitled to have this brief respite. I’m still functioning, perhaps bit hyperactive but nothing more than that. There is an emerging school of thought amongst progressive psychiatrists not to medicate hypomania. Their oath is not to do any harm after all. A little hypomania has never hurt anyone, if anything it bettered them. I’m still taking my meds as described so you can’t fault me for that, however, my main med is an anticonvulsant (which name I can’t mention due to community rules) that is known for curbing the lows but not so much the highs, you in the know will know. I’ve quit my job and fear that will send my psych into medical analysis overdrive about my state. I personally think it was a long time coming with me having to take stress leave twice in only a few months. Would it be possible at all to ride out the high and rely on my meds to offer protection against the low? It’s been brilliant in doing that thus far so I don’t see why not now? I would really just like to enjoy the brief respite from months of stress, dance around my living room like no one is watching and, you know, enjoy life.

SPOONO I lost my family, all my possessions and am stuck living with mum, HERES WHAT I DID TO FEEL GOOD AGAIN!!!
  • replies: 2

I used to have the broken record going around and around in my head jumping tracks from one stuff up to the next. It was ENDLESS!! I found that if I wrote everything down so I only had to remember WHERE the mistakes and broken dreams were, as opposed... View more

I used to have the broken record going around and around in my head jumping tracks from one stuff up to the next. It was ENDLESS!! I found that if I wrote everything down so I only had to remember WHERE the mistakes and broken dreams were, as opposed to WHAT the pointless self destructive stuff was. I could sleep peacefully and no longer needed the record playing. Its been working for me for a while, I do hope this method works for you.

complex stuck in an endless depressive anxious loop...
  • replies: 3

suffocating avolition is giving me severe anxiety bc of things I'm not doing/starting/finishing/the effort of studying seemed so great I dropped out of uni/I barely exist most days. seemingly, though, I don't feel enough anxiety to shake off my apath... View more

suffocating avolition is giving me severe anxiety bc of things I'm not doing/starting/finishing/the effort of studying seemed so great I dropped out of uni/I barely exist most days. seemingly, though, I don't feel enough anxiety to shake off my apathetic existence. I can't enjoy hobbies or fun things bc of the anxiety that comes from knowing I'm not doing the things I need to do. I can't commit to long time-consuming hobbies (reading a book, playing a long story driven videogame, watching a multi-season tv show) bc I'm afraid of tunnel vision, of becoming so lost in it, I forget about anything else. it's moronic to fear this when even without committing to these time-consuming hobbies, I still can't find the energy to do anything I'm supposed to do. eventually, I feel that I lose interest in my hobbies, bc even contemplating one while struggling with the resulting anxiety feels like more effort than I have within me to give. I'm in an endless loop of: having things I need to do > not being able to do things I need to do > not being able to do things I want to do instead > feeling anxious and helpless over this personal failing > resorting to aimless low effort activities if not just sleeping. this seemingly endless struggle is sucking any joy from my life. I've felt shades of this on and off for several years (I'm 25 now) but it's been exponentially worse in the last 6 months. and this loop is accompanied, of course, by my ever faithful inability to feel content for any measure of time that isn't fleeting. a shortcoming I've felt since I was 15. the only thing I actively manage to force myself to do, is to go to work. I can't even begin to fathom the repercussions of losing my job so it's the only fear strong enough to get me to do something I need to do. but even then, I'm making good use of my "sick leave" and liberty to "work from home". I'm lucky to be on time 2 out of the 5 days of the week, if I even manage a 5 day attendance record. growing up, I was told that mental health isn't real, that any issues you have are consequences of your actions, that everyone feels "sad" or "anxious", you just get over it. I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact that maybe I need professional help, maybe medication. I feel anxious even thinking of how I would have to hide this from my family out of shame. I don't even know whether to see a counselor or a psychologist or a psychiatrist. what even is the difference? who will help me, please...

bearded1 Working for change
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I'm new to BeyondBlue and the whole concept of forums and threads, but need some help to make positive change. My depression, and unwillingness to act on, or face consequences of my actions/inactions has broken down my relationship with the m... View more

Hi all, I'm new to BeyondBlue and the whole concept of forums and threads, but need some help to make positive change. My depression, and unwillingness to act on, or face consequences of my actions/inactions has broken down my relationship with the most amazing and supportive woman whom I love so much. I'm not the person she met and fell in love with 10 years ago. I've changed, I'm not sure if this is my environment, depression sneaking in or what. I have mild to moderate depression, and am also identifying other behaviours I'd like to kick. I have made so many plans and promises to her that I just don't come through with, sometimes it's just too hard, or I had the idea now it's her turn to make it happen. She is a most caring and supportive person, this is really not about her, it's about me acknowledging I have depression, and working out how to live with it. I am seeing a psychologist whose helping me to work out where I'm at, and where I want to be, so that's a start. Approval seeking, is a behaviour I noticed recently when I started working in a new place, doing the same job i've done for years. I had to tell myself it didn't matter what the other guys thought of me, just do your job to the best of your ability. This need to "fit in" drove me to tears on more than one occasion. I think I've been doing this in our relationship also, not saying or suggesting anything in case they where wrong, or silly ideas or what I don't know. This behaviour naturaly led to my partner making all the decisions which has been exhausting for her, and addmitantly no good for me either kind of subconsiesly contributing to my deppression. I think I've got over the work thing, and am trying to be more decisive with my partner as this is so much more important. This seems a really disjointed, however that's been my thinking of late, can't really settle on one thing. Essentially I need help, & advice how to accept that I have deppression, deal with it, make changes, and build a relationship where i am the partner she really deserves, not one she has to look after. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Nic_anonymous How do I get help when I am unable?
  • replies: 2

At the moment I am a complete mess. I have an endless cycle of depression and it feels like it’ll never end. It started in 2015 when I had been really sick and every time I think of that year I’m scared it’ll one day all repeat itself. My friend grou... View more

At the moment I am a complete mess. I have an endless cycle of depression and it feels like it’ll never end. It started in 2015 when I had been really sick and every time I think of that year I’m scared it’ll one day all repeat itself. My friend group in school isn’t doing so well and I’m not coping at all. My mum wouldn’t support me in getting help and I really have no way out eccept seeing a school councillor which I haven’ done. I’m only at the age of 14 and I’m really feeling like giving up especially since I have no support and I’m losing interest in activities I enjoy.