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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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JesBla9 Economically and Fat-shaped by my Wife
  • replies: 3

Hi, I've had issues with employment for the past two years. As it stands, I have a full time job that I thoroughly enjoy, pays well. My wife works part time, three days per week. I'm also studying full time at university. I want her to be happy, and ... View more

Hi, I've had issues with employment for the past two years. As it stands, I have a full time job that I thoroughly enjoy, pays well. My wife works part time, three days per week. I'm also studying full time at university. I want her to be happy, and have what she wants, but I've lost a number of jobs in recent years but I usually walk into another within a fortnight - I am so lucky, I know. She made some comments yesterday, indicating that I'm a financial leach. - "I am sick of holding this up with only my money". I'm selfish, etc. etc. etc. She decided to take some of her superannuation out, and when she got it, she wanted to use some of it to clear off some small debts, never (ever) did I ask her to take money out for that. If I'd have known that was her plan, I would've spoken to her against doing it. Now, she's thrown that in my face "I worked for that money, MY money paid off this debt, MY money, not yours". She has really emphasized that it was her money, not mine, or not ours. I've always looked at money like it's ours. We have a joint-bank account, we both contribute. No matter what I do now, she's holding that against me. And I'm concerned that this will last forever. I'm working full time so we can afford her to work part time. Next year, in 2021, she's taking up study - leaving her job to do so. And I've been, and will continue to be, supportive of this. Honestly, all of this (+ my already depleting mental state) makes me feel like I'm worthless - simply a banana peel on the bottom of a full bag of garbage. I feel like a waste of space. I feel like an economic waste of space. I feel like, no matter what I do now, her superannuation will always be held above me. I attempted to take out my own super (after hearing of how she feels) to give to her, to put back into her own. I obviously can't do that, but, god, I would if I could. If I had things worth selling, I'd sell and give her the money. I'm working so hard to find my place. I'm studying, working - wanting her to work part time (in fact, I'm encouraging it). Yet, I feel like a terrible husband. I've done many relationship quizzes in the past two days to find out if I'm a bad partner - and I've been honest - and nothing in there indicates that I am. However, I feel like I am. It's like a burden constantly in my mind. I'm always trying to be better, but consistently falling short. Sorry, if this sounds dramatic. Maybe it's COVID-19, but I feel so alone right now. Money is the devil. Thanks, DB.

4x4 Changing medication feeling alive again.
  • replies: 4

So 2 years ago i went on medication for depreasion and anxiety. Suffered from ilnesses for about 10 years and finally tried medication then. Its helped a heap, anxiety is almost gone but still got depression. So as it helps stop the lows it limits th... View more

So 2 years ago i went on medication for depreasion and anxiety. Suffered from ilnesses for about 10 years and finally tried medication then. Its helped a heap, anxiety is almost gone but still got depression. So as it helps stop the lows it limits the highs. 6 moths ago i went off my medication to see how id cope with out it, under discusion with doc. I had never felt so alive world went from black and white to full of colour but then i had 2 major episodes. Wasn't great. Me and doc talked and ive been back on medication Lifes just not interesting. I feel no emotion towards anything. He has surgested maybe swapping medication see how i go with that one. Anyone found a solution for there experinces like that on medication?

Montanna_1997 Dejavu making me sick
  • replies: 2

Hi there everyone. I am constantly getting this weird dejavu feeling that is making me feel really really unwell and almost like I’m not in my body for a second. It takes me about 30 seconds to recover and then I’m scared it always a sign something b... View more

Hi there everyone. I am constantly getting this weird dejavu feeling that is making me feel really really unwell and almost like I’m not in my body for a second. It takes me about 30 seconds to recover and then I’m scared it always a sign something bad is going to happen I’ve asked people about it and they said it would be my severe depression doing it. Has anyone ever experienced this before?

KazP Struggling with husband who refuses to seek help: PND & GAD?
  • replies: 4

Hello, I'm writing in hopes of getting some help from people who have been in a similar experience or are knowledgeable on PND and GAD. My husband has not been professionally diagnosed, but has admitted to being anxious all the time and has struggled... View more

Hello, I'm writing in hopes of getting some help from people who have been in a similar experience or are knowledgeable on PND and GAD. My husband has not been professionally diagnosed, but has admitted to being anxious all the time and has struggled to connect with our 1.5 year old when she was born, and now our 3 week old son, so I am suspecting this is what he may have. I have been with him for 11 years, we have been married for 3 and we are both in our mid-late 20's. Through this time my husband has struggled to hold a job for more than a year due to the fact he believes he deserves more and wants to make a bigger difference in the world. He is currently not working and hasn't been for the past 6 months. When he was a toddler his dad passed away from an overdose and so was raised (with his two older brothers) by his verbally and emotionally manipulative mother - he is still in constant contact with her, but I refuse to have someone like that in my life. To make things worse we live with my parents as neither of us are working and I think that really affects his self esteem as he isn't providing for his family and is relying on someone else. I love him and I'm happy to work through his problems with him, but he REFUSES to seek help as he thinks getting a job will help his problem - this has not worked in the past. He lashes out with anger, abusive words and is emotionally manipulative when he has his extreme lows. This is becoming extremely difficult for me to deal with on a daily basis. He needs help. I need help. I'm not sure what to do. I keep thinking life would be easier if we weren't together; but the last thing he needs right now is a disconnect from the only support he has. Thanks for listening.

user981 Someone very close has left me
  • replies: 1

I was really close with a girl, having a long distance relationship, and everything was going well, she liked talking to me and loved me. We talked a lot every single day and night. In June I noticed she started being a little different, she started ... View more

I was really close with a girl, having a long distance relationship, and everything was going well, she liked talking to me and loved me. We talked a lot every single day and night. In June I noticed she started being a little different, she started going to sleep more late. We used to always call every night, she started to say that she can’t call tonight, or she would sometimes say her phone is stuffing up. One day, she just didn’t want to talk to me, she didn’t seem enthusiastic to talk and lied about going out when she was at home, I also noticed she stopped sending me snapchat streaks 2 days before this. Later that night I asked why she is being different and she said everything is fine. I then said I love you like we always do and she didn’t respond normally but said “luv you”. Later she said she doesn’t want to be attached to me and it’s more realistic for her to go for someone that lives near her. A day after this happened, she said she wants to go back to being how we were and doesn’t like this small talk. She mentioned she cried, and cried when I texted her and when I said it didn’t seem like you wanted to talk much or have much to do with me, she said she was overwhelmed and wants to have much to do with me and talk to me. A day later I noticed she was being a little different again in the morning, it’s like she didn’t want to talk again. We continued talking until 2 days after being back together I woke up in the morning to find she removed me off her socials. We were talking normally just the night before this happened, it was a shock.

naralle Depression is controlling
  • replies: 5

I've had enough of my depression, I'm on medication and I'm not seeing any councilor but my depression is controlling and it want allow me to enjoy my life and hobbies. I know this might sound funny or even weird, but it's true. This covid19 isn't he... View more

I've had enough of my depression, I'm on medication and I'm not seeing any councilor but my depression is controlling and it want allow me to enjoy my life and hobbies. I know this might sound funny or even weird, but it's true. This covid19 isn't helping either as it's put a damper on one of my activities I was doing and enjoying. I'm trying to keep active but it's hard when you have two prolapsed discs in my lower back and in pain every day. I do take pain relief but this also affects my depression as well. My husband has depression as well and he loves me very much and tries to help me, but its hard to explain to him how you feel. I will stop here.

fred2018 Little Victory
  • replies: 12

I think mentally I have gone backwards in the last month. But happy to say despite waking feeling crappy , could be anxiety or just a bad period of stress not sure yet but I got up at my kinda normal time and went for a run when really the option of ... View more

I think mentally I have gone backwards in the last month. But happy to say despite waking feeling crappy , could be anxiety or just a bad period of stress not sure yet but I got up at my kinda normal time and went for a run when really the option of bed was very tempting.

mooncrab_ Internal Struggle - Anxiety, Depression & BPD
  • replies: 6

Hello, It's been a while since my last post because I thought everything was going well with me. But apparently not. So I'm here to vent again. The last 12months have been worse than ever and I'm deteriorating from the inside. Last year I was told by... View more

Hello, It's been a while since my last post because I thought everything was going well with me. But apparently not. So I'm here to vent again. The last 12months have been worse than ever and I'm deteriorating from the inside. Last year I was told by my psychologist that she couldn't quite work me out and that she suspects I have BPD. I admit it made me feel so uncomfortable. More so than having to be there for my anxiety & depression. It overwhelmed me to the point that I left and never made another appointment with that psychologist again. I know I should have at least found another psychologist to confirm the diagnosis, but I stubbornly told myself that I will be ok and to just keep on going. Pretty sure I was in denial. At the beginning of the year I enrolled myself into a course for Accounting & Bookkeeping blindly believing that I would be fine if I just engage myself in something to keep me occupied. I struggled halfway when lockdown was announced and we had to move to remote learning. I started losing focus and interest. I found myself staring into space and sometimes that lead to stupor. I just felt stuck.I managed to finish the course with an increase in my meds, but really doubtful of getting a job in that field. Plus I didn't really have much interest for it. But I was being constantly encouraged to do something. It has been 3wks since the end of my course and I just have no motivation. No positivity. I only get about 3-4hrs broken sleep so I'm constantly tired. I break out in tears for no particular reason except that I feel really down. I've been losing my sense of time. I constantly question who I am while my partner just sees it as an excuse to do nothing and thinks I'm just being childish. Lately, I've felt more comfortable in my dreams like it's the opposite effect. As if the world I wake up to is the dream. And the dream is the real world. I know I had to do something about it before I wither away into nothingness. So I took the step to get a new referral to another psychologist and a referral to see a psychiatrist. There's a part of me that's scared as hell because genetically, it makes sense. My mother & brother have bipolar and depression. So why wouldn't I? But another part of me is eager to know just how crazy I am. While another part, the small & insignificant part, just wants to crawl under a rock and never hear of it again. I want to be a better person, I really do. But it's like my feet are buried in cement.

Niks85 Fear of the unknown what's next?
  • replies: 2

Hi amazing people Just a few days ago I shared my story and I was feeling really positive about things. I was diagnosed with bipolar in 2014, but for the last few years I have coped really well. Today I'm having a bit of a bad day to be honest. Last ... View more

Hi amazing people Just a few days ago I shared my story and I was feeling really positive about things. I was diagnosed with bipolar in 2014, but for the last few years I have coped really well. Today I'm having a bit of a bad day to be honest. Last night my husband told me he might have to call his work company quits before it goes bang because of this virus. I had no idea things were so bad for his company. He has spent years working hard and his company was doing so well until recently. I'm a bit in shock and now for the first time in years I'm feeling anxious because he's the bread winner in our family and I feel so bad for him. We have a pretty high mortgage, a baby and lots of other expenses. I'm trying to stay optimistic but not having the best day. We've also cancelled our fertility treatment for November we were hoping to have another child but that just won't happen now. I'm feeling a bit devastated just in need of some encouragement.

Niks85 A hopeful story. Depression and anxiety
  • replies: 5

Hi there Just wanted to introduce myself and share a brief story about my journey with bipolar, depression and anxiety. At twelve years old I moved from South Africa to New Zealand. We were so poor at that time. It was then that I became a target for... View more

Hi there Just wanted to introduce myself and share a brief story about my journey with bipolar, depression and anxiety. At twelve years old I moved from South Africa to New Zealand. We were so poor at that time. It was then that I became a target for bullies. My parents were stressed and fighting alot at the time so I told nobody I was being bullied. Anxiety was something I started to experience when I was roughly seven years old because of my dyslexia. After being bullied for years and moving from one place to the next because of dads work I was hit hard with depression at the age of nineteen. Back then I didn't know I had depression. I started to drink to try and numb some of the pain. By the age of 23 I was definitely an alcoholic. When I was 24 I moved to Australia after being in an abusive relationship. I needed a fresh start. For five years after that I began to struggle with my mood, sleep and severe depression and anxiety. When I was twenty nine I just wasn't coping with life and I had a nervous breakdown and was taken to hospital. I was given the diagnosis bipolar disorder due to my mood swings. It was during the darkest time in my life I realised how strong I am. I was put on so many medications with loads of terrible side effects that one day I tried to end my life. I was hospitalized twice after that. Then I had CBT therapy and I did Art therapy. My psychiatrist finally found the right medication for me after so much trial and error. I quit drinking, started walking for exercise and eating healthier. My new partner proposed and I got married. Then came the news that my husband couldn't have children. But I was determined to be a mum and stick by my husband no matter what. Where there is a will there is a way. We ended up having a donor child which was very stressful at first but now the best thing that has ever happened to us. It has been one hell of a journey. I'm still learning every day. Today I have more good days than bad and I'm really enjoying life. I actually never thought I'd say that but here I am and doing well. I often think about if I had taken my life that day I wouldn't have what I have today. All I can say to anyone struggling is to keep going, stay strong, this will pass and tomorrow is a brand new day. It's not a easy journey. When I came out on the other side I was so grateful to experience happiness again after years of struggle and challenges. I'm not completely cured but I have learnt how to cope. Never give up