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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Perry2936 Pointlessness
  • replies: 2

I am 33 years old, on the Autism Spectrum and completely at a loose end in my life. There is nothing left to work for, nothing left that interests me and I am completely isolated because I struggle to connect with anyone. I struggle to connect with m... View more

I am 33 years old, on the Autism Spectrum and completely at a loose end in my life. There is nothing left to work for, nothing left that interests me and I am completely isolated because I struggle to connect with anyone. I struggle to connect with myself. Psychotherapy isn't working (and I have been attending for many years, paying ridiculous sums of money to talk to someone who merely listens and writes, without any further I volunteer for homeless people, yet I feel so detached when I am volunteering, I struggle to connect and feel like a robot. I don't even know if I am helping or just going through the motions. I work in a dead end job in supermarket retail, and have failed multiple degrees in the hopes of getting a better job. Not because I don't understand the work, but because I can't find the support that I need. I spend hours scouring on Meetup for relatively interesting meetups, but most are "coffee and cake", some of which I have been to. I often sit, observing but unable to contribute much to the conversation. I have felt like this my whole life. Watching, observing, understanding, but unable to contribute. I feel like life has lost meaning and I'm going through the motions. I am agoraphobic, but I push through and often go to shopping centres and other busy places to remind myself that I am not alone. All this does is make me more isolated and exhausted. I go to the library, and read books, but get bored after most books that I am interested in have essentially the same information, and information that I can easily get off the internet. I was interested in music, and can play piano very well, but without community, what is the point? Depression has muted all of my interests and without a miracle, my days (besides working) consist of laying in bed with a weighted blanket, scouring information on the internet, hoping I can find a solution to my problems and binge eating. My mother died when I was 13, my father is an alcoholic (whom I had to remove myself from 17 years ago) and my sister (who lives in another state) is depressed herself, and is unemployed. My extended family have been estranged from each other for 20 years, there is no support. Chronic loneliness is ruining my life, and a visit to a random Meetup group is not a solution. When I do reach out, I am often met with "Oh, I'm busy with the kids" or, "Find your own friends." I have no children either, not through choice either. I am struggling and need help.

BipolarAF Please help
  • replies: 9

I'm feeling pretty helpless I’m bipolar type 1, medicated for 3 years, and been experiencing paranoia and distrust towards people close to me. i tried several times to chat with a clinician online but my internet keeps dropping out. I tried to chat t... View more

I'm feeling pretty helpless I’m bipolar type 1, medicated for 3 years, and been experiencing paranoia and distrust towards people close to me. i tried several times to chat with a clinician online but my internet keeps dropping out. I tried to chat to my partner about my intrusive thoughts/paranoia/distrust and he raised his voice and told me to go to hospital even though I said that’s not what I want to do at all. I feel like there’s no one I can trust or talk to I feel so isolated. I feel like even my closest friends don’t understand and that I can’t trust any new friends either. My paranoia is telling me my friends will try send me to hospital/abandon me/make fun of me/think I’m insane even though they haven’t shown me they would do that. It feels like my partner is turning against me and I’m a burden and whilst I understand a lot of this is ‘in my head’, I’m having impulses to run away from everything/delete social media/break up the relationship/disappear. I know this isn’t rational or what I want to do but I tried to talk to him and it didn’t work and I kept feeling like he hated me and is doing things behind my back. I even have felt like my friends are plotting against me and I know that can’t be right but these ideas keep coming into my head. I just wanted to talk to my partner and have him reassure me but he struggles with empathy and emotional reactions and often jumps to anger as a response and it’s just affirming my greatest fears. I don’t know how to switch the paranoia off or deal with it. It’s starting to leak into every day conversations and the thoughts are becoming louder and louder saying I need to just run away from everyone. When I was younger I would do that, just pack a bag and disappear and it was quite unhealthy and unsustainable. I have a nice life here I don’t know why my head is telling me otherwise. Does anyone have any idea how to cope with this ?

Jarred28 Giving up
  • replies: 5

I’m really over this whole depression thing. I finally start to feel better and then suddenly I’m in bed crying thinking about how worthless I am and nothing ever works out the way I hope. Not one person shows that they care about me. I just wanna ru... View more

I’m really over this whole depression thing. I finally start to feel better and then suddenly I’m in bed crying thinking about how worthless I am and nothing ever works out the way I hope. Not one person shows that they care about me. I just wanna run away and hide forever, I hate any social environment. Will I ever be happy

Honeypot Treatment options bipolar
  • replies: 4

Hi, I’m new here and recently diagnosed bipolar 2. I have had major depression on and off for over 35 years mixed with some intense highs. 2 years ago a psychiatrist diagnosed cyclothymic bipolar and she has adjusted that to bipolar 2. I’ve just star... View more

Hi, I’m new here and recently diagnosed bipolar 2. I have had major depression on and off for over 35 years mixed with some intense highs. 2 years ago a psychiatrist diagnosed cyclothymic bipolar and she has adjusted that to bipolar 2. I’ve just started on medication but TMS and DBT have been suggested. The DBT courses are so expensive, $200 each weekly session, which is out of reach. I see a psychologist regularly but I really just ramble on when I’m there. He doesn’t do any particular therapy with me. Can anyone give me thoughts on TMS and DBT please. Or do I just stick with medication? I’m very aware of the thoughts in my head and my personality traits I need to change. I just have immense trouble changing them. Thank you for accepting me.

Snaedis Feeling worthless and not good enough
  • replies: 16

Hi, I have been struggling with loving myself and being positive about who I am. I have had people who were my best friends leave me for no reason. Then my guy best friend who had a relationship with me but then turned out he didn't kow what he was d... View more

Hi, I have been struggling with loving myself and being positive about who I am. I have had people who were my best friends leave me for no reason. Then my guy best friend who had a relationship with me but then turned out he didn't kow what he was doing when I really liked him. Its been a while but I still feel like I am not good enough for him or anyone. Due to my childhood I have always had self-esteem issues. And somehow this situation escalated them. I feel unappreciated, worthless, alone and just not good enough. I don't know what to do. I can't not be friends with him because we have the same friends group and its hard not to see him but it's really sad and upsetting when I see him. He says he cares and is sorry but I don't know why I don't see or feel it in his actions. I don't feel happy about my life or anything anymore. Any help would be greatly appreciated thank you.

C1986 Sick of living without having a life
  • replies: 2

What is the point in being alive if we can't live our lives. Sick of the news and dictator Dan. I get there are people out there who are sick but what life they have left to enjoy has been taken because of this lockdown. I want to go into the high co... View more

What is the point in being alive if we can't live our lives. Sick of the news and dictator Dan. I get there are people out there who are sick but what life they have left to enjoy has been taken because of this lockdown. I want to go into the high country to get away from people and I can't even do that. I am sick of feeling like a prisoner in my own home surrounded by demands and no escape. I'm sick of not being able to go to work and having that incompetent excuse for a premier scold the majority whilst he allowed a minority to spread the infection and get away with it. We only have a short life as it is and we can't even be allowed the chance to enjoy that! I've done the right thing, my family and my friends have all done what is asked. Why should we all be punished because he couldn't get his government to do their jobs properly in the first place? I'm sick of being abused both mentally and physically foror his mess up. I want out

Aurora_B Spiralling for the first time
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone! It’s my first time posting here. I’ve had dysthymia my entire life, only diagnosed a few years ago in my early 20s. I had always thought it was just the way I am. While I have never really been happy, I’ve functioned really well, maintai... View more

Hi everyone! It’s my first time posting here. I’ve had dysthymia my entire life, only diagnosed a few years ago in my early 20s. I had always thought it was just the way I am. While I have never really been happy, I’ve functioned really well, maintained healthy relationships and been generally content with my life. I lost my job a few months ago due to Covid19 and I also have a chronic immune disorder, so I have been isolating hard core for the entirety of the pandemic. I think this combination has sent me spiralling. For the first time in my life, my depression isn’t a melancholic mist but a full bore hail storm. This is the first time I’ve been really scared of how I feel and the thoughts I’m having, and I don’t feel in control at all. It’s also the first time my day to day functioning has been impaired and I just can’t find the ‘oomph’ to do anything, or even care about anything. I’m so listless and spend far too much time on my phone or laptop. Anyway! We all know the symptoms of depression, and I’m having them all right now. Thought it might help to connect with other people in the same boat. Hope everyone is doing as well as they can be.

luckycharms New here and don't know what else to do
  • replies: 5

Hi. I don't really know where else to go but I'm 21 and for the past year I slowly realised I haven't been feeling okay. I started drifting away from all of my friends and have had to take a few semesters off uni. Recently I had a panic attack at hom... View more

Hi. I don't really know where else to go but I'm 21 and for the past year I slowly realised I haven't been feeling okay. I started drifting away from all of my friends and have had to take a few semesters off uni. Recently I had a panic attack at home and I'm not really sure how it came about but my parents have noticed that something was wrong but when I tell them that all the pressure from uni has made me feel anxious and depressed all they say is "you can get past it, you're almost graduating". This sort of manifested and ate at me for so long since they have such high expectations that most days I feel so unmotivated and now I don't really enjoy all the things I love doing. Lately I find myself staying in bed til noon most days and my parents think I'm just lazy and not following what they say. Sometimes I feel like being with them in this house 24/7 is too much and those days I end up wishing I could move out so badly. My mum thinks that I'm doing all this to purposely hurt her but that's not true at all. She keeps asking me what's wrong and I end up saying that it's nothing cause every time I try to tell her I feel like there's something wrong with me she instantly thinks that it's a problem with how she raised me and she goes on about how this is her fault and that she doesn't deserve it and maybe I'm just "lashing" out and choosing not to listen to her since I'm a young adult and that makes me feel even worse about myself. My parents preach so highly that I can "talk to them about anything" but I feel like I can only talk to them about things they want to hear. I can't open up to my mum since she feels like everything I do is me targeting her and the fact that she thinks I would do something like that hurts me. And my dad just agrees with whatever my mum ends up saying. Recently she got really upset at me staying in bed all afternoon that she forcefully booked an appointment with the doctor and told me that I need to fix myself. I get that she wants to try to fix things but I feel that this just wedges a gap between our relationship even more. I don't really feel comfortable seeing someone yet and I don't really know what to do anymore. Most of the time I just want to sleep since I feel so alone and empty inside.

dave1234 Bit of a mixture
  • replies: 2

Hi I've been diagnosed with chronic depression for many years. I've damaged my spine and neck in accidents and whilst I'm not confined to a chair find any exercise brings on pain (throw in lower limb injuries as well). Over the years I've seen both p... View more

Hi I've been diagnosed with chronic depression for many years. I've damaged my spine and neck in accidents and whilst I'm not confined to a chair find any exercise brings on pain (throw in lower limb injuries as well). Over the years I've seen both psychiatrists and psychologists. I have no faith in CBT, and I just don't have the mindset to change it. Of late I've started to believe that people are watching me. Deep down I know they probably aren't, but it's a feeling that won't go away. I'm starting to try to catch people out for looking at me. Not sure if they want to hurt me, but I don't trust them. I know I sound mad, logically I know it's not happening, but at the times I check I'm not thinking in a logical manner. Does this make sense to anyone, or am I starting to go down a slippery slope.

Stressed Guy My life at the moment
  • replies: 8

I didn't know if I should post again on beyond blue but here goes. I'm just going to start off by saying I'm under a lot of stress at the moment. This year feels like a nightmare as we've been trying to move and we've had so many obstacles in our way... View more

I didn't know if I should post again on beyond blue but here goes. I'm just going to start off by saying I'm under a lot of stress at the moment. This year feels like a nightmare as we've been trying to move and we've had so many obstacles in our way. On top of that I'm trying to study a diploma of travel and tourism online. I'm almost halfway through and I'm supposed to film a few role-play for my current unit. I can't do that as the only person who can help is my dae and he works all the time. I don't even care about the course anymore as it feels like I'm mentally and emotionally fatigued most of the time anyway. Plus I'm not passionate about what I'm studying. And courses are terrible online. I can't say I'm the most social person but going to class is a million times better. I also feel like there's a lot of pressure for me to finish this diploma by March next year which is the same time I'm supposed to start uni at the Gold Coast. If we hopefully get there. I currently live in Sydney. I also feel really depressed about a few other things. I feel really bad that my dad works all the time and that I haven't been able to help out my parents more financially. I'm also frustrated that I don't really talk to my brothers much. Also I've never been on a date with a woman, I have no friends, I've never had a job and have never finished a diploma course. All in all I just feel bad about where I am in life. Recently I've been writing a lot more which makes me happy. I've also been trying to exercise a bit more. Although I've stopped going to tennis lessons altogether. I almost got injured the last time I played went I don't want to talk to anybody there anymore since I'll be moving in the next few months. Although we've been talking about the Gold Coast for 3 years but there's been obstacles in the way. I guess what I'm getting at is that I feel stuck in life at the moment and I don't know what to do about it. I keep thinking maybe I deserve not to be happy. Everything I want seems like a pipe dream. I think about run away everyday and going anywhere else. If I didn't care about helping my parents then I would probably pack my bags and leave. I'm sorry for even posting this but I don't know who to talk to. Thanks for reading it. John

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