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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Kram21 First time to reach out in a long time
  • replies: 31

Im a 52 year old male that suffers chronic pain and depression for many years. It has cost me most of my "friends" my wife and I see no way out.Last month or so I have been falling back down the dark hole and I can see no end in site.I have lost 2 fr... View more

Im a 52 year old male that suffers chronic pain and depression for many years. It has cost me most of my "friends" my wife and I see no way out.Last month or so I have been falling back down the dark hole and I can see no end in site.I have lost 2 friends ( in Thailand ) due to covid and many more there are suffering the economic effect of it. Yes they are worse off than me and I guess I feel guilty of just being a sook. I have battled depression for over 15 years and most of the time I manage to keep it fairly normal. Last month I have been loosing control of it and I dont know how to stop it. Now some days I dont even get out of bed ( apart to go to toilet and get water ) My body hurts I sleep a LOT and find pleasure in nothing. I dont want to end up the suicidal train wreck I was years ago as I dont think I have the strength to go through that again. Times are tough for everyone I know but I have no real trigger for this to happen to me now. Thanks for listening to the rant of a soon to be crazy mad man AHHA

imtrying_ I just feel like I can't do this anymore
  • replies: 4

I've never been diagnosed with depression but I feel so low all the time and I just don't know what to do. I hate something new about myself all the time, I'm unmotivated, I can't do anything. Recently school has just started getting way harder. And ... View more

I've never been diagnosed with depression but I feel so low all the time and I just don't know what to do. I hate something new about myself all the time, I'm unmotivated, I can't do anything. Recently school has just started getting way harder. And it's not like I can't do any of it, it's fully within my abilities to do what they're asking of me but I just... can't. I'm not even doing the bare minimum and it's still overwhelming. Today was supposed to be a 'catchup day', sort of like a day off, but I have so much work piling up that it's just a regular stressful day without any teams or zoom calls. I feel so inadequate all the time, I'm not smart, or skilled, or talented, or athletic or even good at interacting with people. And I hate discussing my emotions with my friends because I always feel so guilty. I mean, I have had a standard, happy life and I feel lower than garbage all the time. That's not fair to them, because they've all had actual problems in their lives. What right do I have to be depressed over nothing? I know it's fully in my control to fix things and help myself but I just feel like I can't and that it would be too hard to try. Basically, everything sucks but nothing actually sucks. I feel like a failure because I can't do what I'm supposed to, a liar because I'm not honest about how I feel, and a selfish idiot for feeling this way when I have no reason. And now I feel dumb for ranting on here being all woe is me about nothing. Which I know everyone will say is actually fine and that I'm allowed to reach out but like... idk. anyway. thanks for reading.

Nervybella Do you ever feel guilty for feeling low?? I know I do…
  • replies: 4

Hi friends so… lockdown. I’m getting sick of talking about it but honestly, it feels all consuming right now. For context, when I hear about the most recent Melbourne lockdown I went back to my parents place (I live alone and didn’t want to lockdown ... View more

Hi friends so… lockdown. I’m getting sick of talking about it but honestly, it feels all consuming right now. For context, when I hear about the most recent Melbourne lockdown I went back to my parents place (I live alone and didn’t want to lockdown by myself) so I had some human interaction while working from home. For the past week I just can’t shake this feeling of doom and gloom. I’m in such a low mood. I know so many people are feeling this way, but to make it more complicated, I have started to feel incredibly guilt for feeling this way because i have a safe home i have a job I have company in my family Then I see what’s happening in Afghanistan and I feel awful about myself for wallowing in my own shitty mood anyone Else feeling like this? -Bella

Here2Talk Taking time off work for mental health
  • replies: 2

Hi all wondering if anyone has ever been able to take time off work for depression /anxiety and how? Did you get penalised by your employer

Hi all wondering if anyone has ever been able to take time off work for depression /anxiety and how? Did you get penalised by your employer

Bev13 Is there no end?!?
  • replies: 2

Hi, Moved to country Vic a while ago to try a and find peace and contentment. Alas I’m still every place I go. No support no access to psychiatric help, all taken up with COVID problems. I’m 52 haven’t found anything to help yet....

Hi, Moved to country Vic a while ago to try a and find peace and contentment. Alas I’m still every place I go. No support no access to psychiatric help, all taken up with COVID problems. I’m 52 haven’t found anything to help yet....

white knight Depression, gratitude and tokenism
  • replies: 3

Falling into a depressive cycle comes with many changes. Most if not all these changes are not welcome, tiredness, physically drained, moods and sadness. Sadness often due to the invisible cage of which we are imprisoned. No wonder others that havent... View more

Falling into a depressive cycle comes with many changes. Most if not all these changes are not welcome, tiredness, physically drained, moods and sadness. Sadness often due to the invisible cage of which we are imprisoned. No wonder others that havent been touched by the illness cannot help us. In fact, helping ourselves is paramount because of that. We can take our meds we can talk on the phone without the words from similar we are all alone After all we are born alone. Connection to parents is there but we are separate in so many ways. Comfort from friends and relatives can only go so far. With spouses we expect so much more, after all they are our soul mate right? But they have limits also. Our lack of motivation can stretch the friendship as pressure mounts in their daily lives. Hi ho hi ho off to work he goes who he can talk to nobody knows he carries the burden of his life for two on the brink if only you knew... And so the balance of support and care is limited for us in that "hole". For some sufferers a word of encouragement is enough to spark us into a burst of happiness and ignore our dark mind. For others nothing is enough. Tokenism is powerful as it displays intent, it shows endeavour. At least tokenism is present when there is nothing else to receive. But life is a balance and if that balance is not there with your spouse or carer then extra burden mounts on them. She drives away as I sleep forever No motivation, no sound, no endeavour I wake to answer the phone - some friend to the bathroom and my needs contend As she returns from a hard day carer for me surely I can make her a cup of tea?... And so that tokenism makes a carers fall soft. No one said depression was easy. It use to be "till death us do part" but really now its "till I'm done-separation will come". We must nurture our relationships and its that little token of care that when given, we help balance that see-saw of the ramifications of a mental illness on our loved ones. I put all my care in a glass jar my spouse, my love takes it afar she said we are forever and I surely agree Hers in my jar and I carry it with me and on occasions I twist her lid use every bit of strength to fulfil my bid place some care of my own real deep then curl up again and fall to sleep... All spouses need reassurance. It is the very essence of ensuring they are not taken for granted. Tokenism is a link in the chain of your partners necklace along with gratitude and others... TonyWK

Darekairu Today
  • replies: 3

FEELING BAD Everything is so annoying! I want to smash something I want to hurt something Small things are making me so angry The rain. The cat screeching The dogs pulling on the lead The barking every time there's a noise I want to scream The walls ... View more

FEELING BAD Everything is so annoying! I want to smash something I want to hurt something Small things are making me so angry The rain. The cat screeching The dogs pulling on the lead The barking every time there's a noise I want to scream The walls creaking The licking noise the dogs are making The sound of my husband's speaker phone rumbling Can it just all stop! Why am I getting so frustrated so easily I don't feel ok at the moment. I waver between feelings of frustration to feelings of boredom Hopelessness And anger Then I try and pick myself up And it works for a while I smile and focus on nature I can be in awe of the world I exercise I eat well. But then something small shifts the good feelings and I feel on edge and angry Or low and just sad So up and down lately There's nothing to look forward to anymore It is all becoming so repetitive And pointless Not sure what I need or even want - to feel better Physically not feeling great either Stomach not right Head not right What would I do if I only had months to live? That's been a thought lately No I don't want ro harm myself Quite the opposite As I don't feel I've got anywhere in life yet All I know is I'm not happy I'm not satisfied If I died soon it would be such a waste No real peak or purpose reached

Miranda007 help! words of wisdom needed - bipolar 2, ADHD and ASD have ruined my marriage
  • replies: 2

Hi, I'm just seeking anyone's experience with my situation. Our marriage was on the rocks 8 years ago. 4 years ago my husband cheated on me twice and I have now discovered he is cheating. We have been married for 26 years. In no way am I defending my... View more

Hi, I'm just seeking anyone's experience with my situation. Our marriage was on the rocks 8 years ago. 4 years ago my husband cheated on me twice and I have now discovered he is cheating. We have been married for 26 years. In no way am I defending my husbands actions but I do admit that the last 10 years have been harder for him emotionally and physically in the relationship. We have 2 beautiful boys, 1 is 20 and the other 15. The eldest has ASD/depression/anxiety and the youngest has adhd and tourettes. Our family life has been quite full on over the years, getting them to this stage but everything has taken its toll, Due to bp2 and asd it can be difficult for me to show and give affection. As we all know bp2 is a difficult beast to master and constant drug juggling. I feel liike such a stuff up, I feel like I am a burden to the whole family. My husband is a lovely, caring guy with a big heart but unfortunately I had only just started to trust him last year in the relationship after his infidelity in 2016. His multiple affairs and lying straight to my face, children being devastated, it has made all my mental illness worse.I am psychologically scarred and find it hard to undo the mental mindmap from that terrible time. We are supposed to go to marriage counselling this weekend. He told me last week hr wanted a divorce as I never believe him (i found a text on his instagram from his first affair). I have just discovered things on the bank account (singles sites, dating apps, a gift for the girl he is seeing etc. I feel ill, my anxiety is of the Richter and its destabilized my bp2. He doesnt know I know so on Sunday I will raise it in a safe space of counselling. I know he plays a large part in this downfall but I feel incredibly guilty that I couldn't do what was needed, put aside my own mental instabliity/road blocks. To make it worse his father died today. My husband is a fifo worker so flies home tomorrow. sorry for the rant but I really have no one else to confide in. My family don't know the reason for our first 6 month separation. I feel so hopeless, a failure, a bad mother, I can feel the rapid decline in my mental state. This happened last time and I feel I let my kids down and spent most of the time crying and sleeping. I hate myself so much and its just so exhausting in overdrive with anxiety. I had today off and I'm taking tomorrow off. I just want to run away, i cant face it.

Cait333 Depression is getting worse.
  • replies: 11

I'm not sure what happened but my depression and anxiety have never been this bad and I don't see it getting any better. I honestly feel I am beyond all help and just want it to end now. Every time I reach out for help I'm met with "don't worry, thin... View more

I'm not sure what happened but my depression and anxiety have never been this bad and I don't see it getting any better. I honestly feel I am beyond all help and just want it to end now. Every time I reach out for help I'm met with "don't worry, things will get better" and "have you tried taking up a hobby?" like... seriously? I feel like my world is coming to an end and the best advice I get is to take up knitting? I never feel like what I am going through is treated as an adult situation, rather I get professionals and others talking to me about my mental illness like I'm a five-year-old. I did have one doctor who after I repeatedly told him that I was miserable, put me on anti-depressants but he moved away and the area that I live in to pretty remote so when I got a new doctor, she wasn't keen on me continuing with the medication but to be honest the medication or the amount that I was on made little difference anyway. I am constantly being handed around to different teams of mental health/community workers, doctors, counselors, therapists, like I'm just being handed off to different people saying "here, she's your problem now" This is hell.

Guest_4643 Hi everyone, I'm back.
  • replies: 742

Hi everyone, mb20lover here. I wasn't sure where to post this. It's been a while since I was on the forums, so I just wanted to make a post saying that I'm back. However, I'll try my best to limit my time, comments, etc on here. I won't bother taggin... View more

Hi everyone, mb20lover here. I wasn't sure where to post this. It's been a while since I was on the forums, so I just wanted to make a post saying that I'm back. However, I'll try my best to limit my time, comments, etc on here. I won't bother tagging anyone, and I'll try to keep this as my only open thread that I have created. I've missed everyone I've spoken to on here, and I hope to talk to some new people. I have been using my offline supports - my Psychiatrist, GP, Parent support of course, and a Social Worker. I'm in the process of finding a Psychologist but I'm having no luck. Anyway, I just wanted to pop in and say hello, and also I hope I haven't upset anyone on the forums or anything like that because nothing was intentional, so I deeply apologise. An update on me, I recently turned 21, can't do much with COVID though, it's a hard year for everyone unfortunately. I also have a milestone, an achievement, I've been seeing my Psychiatrist for a year which is the longest I've stayed with a therapist. And I also finally have a GP I feel comfortable with. I'm on different meds that seem to be working a little but I still of course have my moments, but these meds I've been on the longest for out of any of the ones I've tried. Other than that, please don't feel pressured to comment anyone, although it would be nice to connect with some people, old or new, but like I said that's okay. I just wanted to check in. If you've read this and made it this far, thank you. Stay safe and take care everyone, as much as possible with the unfortunate COVID circumstances. Thinking of all the Beyond Blue Mods & Users. I've missed everyone. - mb20lover.