Depression

Depression affects people in Australia every day. Share your own story and learn about other member’s experiences with depression.

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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
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Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
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I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
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Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Down-Mum Feeling lost
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Hi guys,first time posting. Not really sure where to start, growing up sucked balls but it is what it is. My adult life I met my husband 8 years later we got married, my mum passed away 1 week before our wedding, that was a hard ticket to cop. Moving... View more

Hi guys,first time posting. Not really sure where to start, growing up sucked balls but it is what it is. My adult life I met my husband 8 years later we got married, my mum passed away 1 week before our wedding, that was a hard ticket to cop. Moving forward, I took care of my dad with his bills (while paying our own house repayments etc) until my dad sold the family home for much less than what it was worth as he had no choice. At this time I got my dad into an over 50’s place that backed onto the same street I lived which I loved as we could take care of him, we would cook a meal for him (hubby likes to slow cook meat) so dad would come up once a week and if we had leftovers we would take them down to my dad. Friday afternoons my son and I used to go and spend time with my dad.one Friday he said I’ll get you to take me to the hospital to get this X-ray done if that ok, I told him no problem, by Sunday morning his neighbour was knocking at my door saying that things weren’t good at dads. She called the ambulance, when I walked down there I had to break into dads unit, he had fallen over and proceeded to ask for me, while laying on the floor pretty much de*d he told me that he had been on the floor since Tuesday, I had been there the Monday. I just can’t seem to overcome this, even at 230am my mind still goes though crazy thoughts if I had of done things sooner etc. I know I can’t blame myself. My brother promised me a funeral, dad didn’t have a lot of money as my husband and I had been paying a lot of bills that the other kids didn’t know about. He spent 18 days in intensive care after being declared brain dead, which I spent every day by his side, my dad was my best friend after mum passed, we became closer than ever.my dad got cremated without a ceremony or any family being there which I think imstruggling with as I didn’t get any closure. Sorry if this doesn’t make sense I was just typing as thinking. My head is a mess and I need to vent and find other people who maybe going through what I have who have been able to move forward. please help!

Guest_1584 l can not stand what the world is becoming
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Change change, update update, learn this be that, gdp's and countries becoming so inter tangled , cultures lost and as if Australia needed to lose what tiny culture it did have? The internet/computers/smart phones, l just hate what it's doing to the ... View more

Change change, update update, learn this be that, gdp's and countries becoming so inter tangled , cultures lost and as if Australia needed to lose what tiny culture it did have? The internet/computers/smart phones, l just hate what it's doing to the world, lives ,our young, just so wrong our minds and blown stress is higher than ever in history, so damn depressing and never ending. BB has changed, Ebay l use for work never endingly, every time l go to run ads l have to learn whatever latest bs changes they've made since. My trading site one of the best l'd found, they've completely ruined, it's not even customizable anymore. It's taken 6mth to hack my own new computer and ways to stop never ending updates - you normally can't turn of, yet they suck up your data , computers stops whenever it feels like it middle of anything fitting updates. Yeah you can at least set a time- just more bs. Not to mention important stuff just lost bc of updating. And BB , sorry but what on earth possessed them to do whatever they';ve done to this place, it's unusable to me now. Not to mention 3cam band at top now using valuable screen space with nothing in it that couldn't be set on a1cm high line instead of taking up 3cm of your screen, the word counts stuffed, threads are ridiculously set out. The insanity of changes all these places make- out of pure boredom l'm sure, ANY of them touch anything, l've seen so many sites just ruined. Thank the Gods we've at least got a new Gov now with at least some soul and undoing and bringing in sooooo many things our country's been so desperate for so long yet had been rail roaded into putting up with the last 10yrs. Maybe the materialism mentality with all polished up brand new everything and shallow life it's become here will find some soul again, so many things. So much about the world now. Gdp's,wars, competing, climate,internets and never ending new gadgets and change and updates, monstar insane mortgages,costs of living- learn this manage that cope with this get with the program, talk about "the human condition" There it all is right there. rx

NotAGhost Being Good At Feeling Bad
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Anyone ever get so tired of learning how to deal with mental illness? They tell you to go for a walk, talk to friends, have a snack or a hot drink, eat, sleep, go under the Sun. And look, yeah, those things get me through the day, but it does not mak... View more

Anyone ever get so tired of learning how to deal with mental illness? They tell you to go for a walk, talk to friends, have a snack or a hot drink, eat, sleep, go under the Sun. And look, yeah, those things get me through the day, but it does not make the day more enjoyable. It just keeps me alive- and that's good, apparently. I mean sure, it actually is. I want to play the new hzd game, watch the next season of sandman, go swimming when it finally gets hot enough and all those things require breathing to one extent or the other. But sometimes I wonder if the fact that those things feel worth doing is the illusion, and depression is the most accurate response to reality. If suffering is the baseline and those moments of joy and fulfilment are evolutions way of bribing us into existence. If so, evolution really needs to pay me better. I guess I'm not having kids though, so maybe it's right not to care about me. The blighter should really remember we are a social species and that my existence is still good for the community. Atleast, I hope it is. Either way, it's stuck with me for now, I'm really good at being miserable and somehow finding joy. I'm really good at supporting the people I love, and want them to have the opportunity to support me. I'm really good at doing the daily little things, eating something, looking at the blue sky, talking to someone, for a bit. If depression wants to end my mortal existence I needs to use its own hands, mine are occupied.

Tim25 Over it.
  • replies: 4

Why is life just work til you die? I have no desire to be alive, I work to live yet I hate the concept of both. I just want it to be done. I won't take my own life, but I don't want to keep surviving. I'd rather die now and let my kids have my meagre... View more

Why is life just work til you die? I have no desire to be alive, I work to live yet I hate the concept of both. I just want it to be done. I won't take my own life, but I don't want to keep surviving. I'd rather die now and let my kids have my meagre possessions and move on without me. Yet on I'll go til something ends me. Why?

Gob Struggling with weight gain
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I gained some weight and I dont like how I feel about it I know its good but I feel sick with how my body and stomach especially look .I feel just like a vile disgusting lump of fat,I feel sick when I look in the mirror .I hate what I see .I dont kno... View more

I gained some weight and I dont like how I feel about it I know its good but I feel sick with how my body and stomach especially look .I feel just like a vile disgusting lump of fat,I feel sick when I look in the mirror .I hate what I see .I dont know if I can handle gaining even more ( im trying to get up to my goal weight,I've been struggling with anorexia for 3rys and im trying to get better ) i just feel so hopeless right now ,im trying so hard not to restrict, think about calories, or track them .I feel like a joke writing about this ,but im not able to really talk about this to anyone .does anyone or has anyone gone through similar issue ? I feel like every day a step forward then two back .I cant win .I dont like feeling full but I have to be.or I starve feel great but slowly die.either way I feel like death and deserving of it .I just wish I could pause life for a moment ,just take a breath but I cant .I also feel awful for how I've treated my family I love them and im still alive because of them but right now I cant stand being near them ,I just feel emense emotional stress and shame when I'm around them .I dont want them to see this I almost just want them to forget about me so they can be happy .

Kazza-Razza I am an emotional wreck.
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I don’t want to go into too much detail.. all I can say for now is I’m that stressed out and depressed that I can’t think straight.. I am bothering the people around me because they think I’m hounding them but I’m not I’m just having anxiety attack s... View more

I don’t want to go into too much detail.. all I can say for now is I’m that stressed out and depressed that I can’t think straight.. I am bothering the people around me because they think I’m hounding them but I’m not I’m just having anxiety attack s and I’m in panic mode. I tried to chat with a councillor and once I entered the details needed and clicked the button to proceed to the chat it would not load.I just need someone I can talk to casually online without having to call and I would prefer to remain as anonymous as possible.My world around me is falling apart and I am pushing everyone away from me because of that .. they think I’m asking for the impossible or that I’m being difficult or just being a c**t for the sake of it.. but I’m not.. I’m just having an attack.. every bad thing even little things that would seem insignificant to a person that isn’t experiencing what I am right at this moment. I need a professional to chat to.. is there anyone on here having the same issues with the online chat to a councillor that I’m having ? If so can you please tell me how you resolved the problem so I can do so myself and get the help I need. I know they say take it day by day and I’m tired but I don’t think sleeping is going to make me feel any better not until I can speak to someone who is trained in talking to a person who suffers depression or lives with mental health issues everyday of their lives like I do. please don’t just ignore this.. I need some compassion and understanding to resolve the issue surrounding the 24/7 chat. Otherwise tonight is going to be a long night and I can’t help myself until I can gain access to someone who can help me, help myself. Thanx.

teamwork Husband left home, suspect it’s depression
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Hi all, I have spent the last few months reading various threads and have got so much information and feel a bit more relieved to know that I am not alone in this.. thanks to the supportive people in advance. Here’s my reason for being here. My husba... View more

Hi all, I have spent the last few months reading various threads and have got so much information and feel a bit more relieved to know that I am not alone in this.. thanks to the supportive people in advance. Here’s my reason for being here. My husband of 14 years has left home 4 months ago saying he has no feelings for me anymore. Prior to this I noticed him slowly withdrawing from social gatherings, staying at work late, always saying he is tired, and spending a lot of time on his own. His alcohol intake has increased as well. I have encouraged him to see his GP to express his feelings. He does not want help because he is in complete denial that there’s anything wrong with him. I just don’t understand how someone so loving, caring can suddenly lose feelings for me and say he doesn’t love me. He has moved out of home to his parents home. we have 3 kids who miss him very much. I am trying my best to hold the fort but I’m struggling to come to terms with this change. mum starting to wonder if it is really the depression that is making him feel this way or is it just that he has genuinely fallen out of love with me? I have asked him about his lack of feelings, specifically 'Does he feel like he’s lost his ability to love? Does it feel like he can't love me, that he can't love himself and he can't love life?' And he’s said yes to all three questions. But still denies that he doesn’t have a mental health issue. I am losing all hope. The more questions I ask I feel like I was a failure as a wife. I often ask myself why am I not good enough or worthy enough for someone to fight for me? I know deep down that none of this is on me, but most of my thoughts sway to feeling hopeless and unworthy. I want to help my husband so much but he completely shuts me out. Any conversation I have with him ends with him partly blaming me for the breakdown of our relationship. Should I hold on to hope that things will turn around? Will the stubbornness ever break so he can see he needs to focus on his mental health.

dead_cactus Anger issues caused by dwindling self-esteem?
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Growing up I am often criticized whenever I do not achieve the best. My parents were raised in a culture of humility and they are practically the epitome of such. A habit has been to diminish me so much while listening to other people exaggerate thei... View more

Growing up I am often criticized whenever I do not achieve the best. My parents were raised in a culture of humility and they are practically the epitome of such. A habit has been to diminish me so much while listening to other people exaggerate their talents. As a teen I got into frequent internal conflicts because I had believed that they only wanted to please their friends and make them feel more important than they are by bringing themselves and me down. It was a tormenting process for me to get used to because to me my parents' opinions worth more than anyone else's. My motivation died because I felt indescribably insecure and their doubts towards me gradually turned into me doubting myself. Since the beginning of 2022 I often lash out on people for questioning what I say, I hate disagreements, I hate people rejecting my opinions and I made myself narcissistic and brutal. It is needed for me to reassure myself all the time by doing better and better and better until I forget why I'm even doing things at all. But after achieving something I feel so out of everything because my life has no excitement, no socialization, no pets. I'm so young but my life's nothing other than the split second of adrenaline rush before reaching a temporary goal. I can't even give myself a meaning. This is probably my longest rant ever.

Coco18-8 Bad again
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Hi, I’ve gone through depressive episodes before but this one has been going on for nearly two months and it feels different. It’s heavier, everyday I get home and cry, I am not happy with my life, I cannot tell this to my parents, I have a psycholog... View more

Hi, I’ve gone through depressive episodes before but this one has been going on for nearly two months and it feels different. It’s heavier, everyday I get home and cry, I am not happy with my life, I cannot tell this to my parents, I have a psychologist but can’t see them till September. I’ve tried talking to a friend but it doesn’t make me feel better like it has previously. Plus I’m in year 12 and about to do the hsc, I am lost, sad and don’t know what to do. Each week seems harder to get through

Cookiebelle Another Job Bites the Dust :(
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Back in 2018 I had a severe shoulder injury at work and had to go on workcover. That was a very horrible time as they (WC) do all they can to 'rehabilitate" one and get one back to any kind of occupation. I was bullied and traumatised and I ended up ... View more

Back in 2018 I had a severe shoulder injury at work and had to go on workcover. That was a very horrible time as they (WC) do all they can to 'rehabilitate" one and get one back to any kind of occupation. I was bullied and traumatised and I ended up having surgery. The surgery was terrible and I suffered enormously. Meanwhile the other shoulder was injured through over use. Since then I have tried to get back into the workforce numerous times. Because of my injuries I simply cannot do any work at all that involves using my arms! Which is pretty much everything! I just resigned from my new job as the work exacerbated my injuries and I am now in constant pain and wondering what I can do next. I am so upset and over this. I know certain people (family) think I am exaggerating. I have gone over and beyond to try to find a job that doesn't cause issues but there are none. I feel I am totally useless and will be claiming TPD next week for a paltry sum. I have no choice. I know that will make certain people think badly of me again. They are not living with this. The constant pain and agony...having to be mindful of every da.. thing I do...the sleepless nights and overuse of pain killers...I feel my life is finished to be honest. All I wish for is to receive the lousy TPD and just be able to live a calm and peaceful life. I am in my late fifties and I have always felt I won't live very long. I would just like my last years to be stress free. Other than my beloved pet and son (adult) I have no life. I do not like people very much as I have been used and abused by so many. I just want a quiet existence. Is that too much to ask? I find everything nowadays to be just rubbish and horrible anyway. People have become ridiculous with their social media and there seems very few who are legitimately decent humans. I think the World has gone to sh... anyway so really have no desire to be here other than to be here for my two beloveds.