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Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Anxious- Getting so tired
  • replies: 1

I am so tired of thinking about death & wanting to die. It's exhausting & painful & I am really worried about myself.

I am so tired of thinking about death & wanting to die. It's exhausting & painful & I am really worried about myself.

Unicorn_Kitty Is anyone particularly upset about dealing with ‘cognitive defects’?
  • replies: 6

I have been struggling with cognitive defects throughout my life, such as lack of attention, lack of awareness of surroundings/directions, slow processing speed, forgetfulness, slower learning abilities & poor social skills. I am managing to keep my ... View more

I have been struggling with cognitive defects throughout my life, such as lack of attention, lack of awareness of surroundings/directions, slow processing speed, forgetfulness, slower learning abilities & poor social skills. I am managing to keep my streams of income, and more feedback is good, however a lot of services seem indifferent about whether or not they have me working for them. I’ve been given negative feedback a few times about my lack of interactions and some people seem to have a problem with me not knowing what has been said/shown to me right away or for not remembering. When I’m in a situation where I’m unsure about something or someone points something out to me when I wanted to figure it out in my own time & way, it upsets me tremendously, to the point of feeling worthless, cognitively defective & sometimes to the point of suicidal feelings in which I contemplate the point of existing, why my parents had me, why I wasn’t euthanised or murdered & whether I am a waste of space. These feelings are somewhat temporary & occasional but they can be triggered in similar circumstances. Cognitive defects are the worst of issues I’ve dealt with as they may very well be permanent and they are ongoing and detrimental to my self-worth and happiness. I would like to figure out if these slip ups are typical & whether there is a way to feel better in these moments. Thank you for reading!

britishtvfan can't take it anymore
  • replies: 60

i'm having such a hard time lately. i had some person in the uk who i thought was a good close friend of mine. there were so many red flags that i didn't see - they didn't show me what they looked like & when i politely asked them they kept making ex... View more

i'm having such a hard time lately. i had some person in the uk who i thought was a good close friend of mine. there were so many red flags that i didn't see - they didn't show me what they looked like & when i politely asked them they kept making excuses like "so what if i am an old creepy man, it wouldn't make a difference?" & things like that. i get being insecure but she knew what i looked like. i knew her name & age but that's all. i started talking to her on a blogging website because we both liked rock & metal music, old british sitcoms/comedies etc. she was also a violent person as she told me she's beaten people up before in real life. & she shares what she calls "art" which is violent things of blood, people being hurt etc. i should've cut ties with her then. we had an argument because she told me she was going to be there on a certain day after christmas & then she sends me a message an hour before we talk (used to be 3am for me but then 4am because of daylight savings over there) & her message wasn't even apologetic, it was like she typed up some excuse & copied & pasted it to avoid me. i kept apologising to her & admitting my mistakes, trying to work things out for both of us. i liked talking to her because we had inside jokes, we talked about things in common, we roleplayed which i enjoyed (stuff like fanfiction, so we'd act as the characters in a show we both liked & do romance, funny stuff, drama, etc). it made me happy. she was threatening to me although she can't do anything. i'm so hurt & upset by this & i feel so stupid & regretful that i ever joined & talked to her. i can't afford therapy. idk if my meds are working. i just stay up late & sleep in late & my parents get annoyed with me, i understand why but i don't feel like doing anything like going out of the house anymore, i haven't for months, even when i was on good terms with her. she said good things about me like she doesn't want to lose me but she cut ties with me yesterday saying she wants nothing to do with me. accuses me of stuff i never said & did, calls me a narcissist, manipulative, & other hurtful things. i'm in a group online which is for mental health suffers worldwide of all ages trying to support each other in a friendly environment. but i post & they seem to get ignored, like my comments, even when i put trigger warnings. but everyone else's, even worse posts, get approved. i get they're busy. i get left on read & avoided by everyone. i wish i was never born.

50_shades_of_neurodivergent Partnership challenges
  • replies: 3

I am a married person with a toddler in my early thirties. I have been through mental health issues and this still impacts my family to some extent. I can understand that it must be challenging for my partner too. But I have been hurting a lot recent... View more

I am a married person with a toddler in my early thirties. I have been through mental health issues and this still impacts my family to some extent. I can understand that it must be challenging for my partner too. But I have been hurting a lot recently due to their lack of attention to what I’m constantly going through, lack of proper communication and showing that they care for me. I feel that they try to avoid conversations if it gets to a challenging topic and like to believe that everything will sort itself out. I often feel frustrated trying to explain myself, asserting my emotional needs, and just being heard or seen at times. I have started hating this attachment and how I don’t see an end to this. I have never really attempted suicide, but have felt like I want to stop existing at times which is highly disturbing. I put that in words so my partner might try and reach out a bit more and maybe he does but honestly, it is just getting more and more frustrating. I am so sick of hurting and crying so much and haring myself for not being strong enough or independent enough. I don’t feel like I can explain myself to anyone anymore which is starting to affect my day to day functioning in a subtle manner. I am so torn between emotions and I just want to talk to someone who cares.

Jessksch How are you guys keeping it together as everything is getting more and more expensive?
  • replies: 1

I work from 7:30am to evening, and just seems like I can't do anything with the money I earn besides pay bills, buy groceries and rent an apartment. I just don't have the energy anymore to do anything or,money is still too tight. I came home after a ... View more

I work from 7:30am to evening, and just seems like I can't do anything with the money I earn besides pay bills, buy groceries and rent an apartment. I just don't have the energy anymore to do anything or,money is still too tight. I came home after a long day today and just broke down crying realizing how little time to myself I have until tomorrow is another day of work. I got a huge bill today and was told people living in our complex had an extreme rent increase too, so most likely we will also have that. I am struggling and don't know how to cope anymore.

BobbyOz What should I do
  • replies: 3

Hello so I’m 22 and never had a job, I know the unemployment rate is 3% so I don’t understand why it’s so difficult for me. I applied for hundreds and got nothing back. I’m a virgin I know you’re supposed to lose it at 16 but I’m a nerd. I feel like ... View more

Hello so I’m 22 and never had a job, I know the unemployment rate is 3% so I don’t understand why it’s so difficult for me. I applied for hundreds and got nothing back. I’m a virgin I know you’re supposed to lose it at 16 but I’m a nerd. I feel like my life isn’t worth living anymore. What should I do?

Badluck Bipolar Diagnosis and Treatment
  • replies: 7

Hi. I've been with beyondblue for about 10 years. I myself am diagnosed with PTSD, Depression and Anxiety issues. I recently married and found out my wife has a severe form of depression and anxiety. To the point she has suicidal thoughts, sits in th... View more

Hi. I've been with beyondblue for about 10 years. I myself am diagnosed with PTSD, Depression and Anxiety issues. I recently married and found out my wife has a severe form of depression and anxiety. To the point she has suicidal thoughts, sits in the corner of a dark room rocking back and forth crying, will throw tantrums on the floor, and generally cannot be talked to whilst she is going through these moments. When she is done usually many hours later or the following day she will apologise profusely and say that was not her saying and doing all those things. It has happened in hotels, shopping centres, and in the street. Grabbing hold of me dragging herself on the ground. When she is having an episode in a room I try and talk to her and to calm her down and ask what's going on, but she grabs hold of me and won't get out of my personal space. This is where additional problems lie. With my anxiety issues and PTSD I can't stand someone to be in my personal space generally not letting me get away. It flicks a switch in me. I just want to be left alone when this is happening. But you can imagine being late at night in a hotel in a foreign country you have nowhere to go and don't really want to leave her alone at the same time in case she harms herself. My psychiatrist has advised that I walk away from her no matter where I am. It's easier said than done though. One time it happened while I was driving. She remained suicidal and full of blame about me treating her poorly and leaving her in the middle of nowhere. I can't win. So after that very long introduction, my thoughts are that she has severe bipolar. Maybe some people can help chime in if I am incorrect. Not a medical diagnosis I know but she will not go to a medical professional because her culture deems it inappropriate to do so. And I can't force her. Is there anyone with my similar PTSD etc condition that has had to deal with a Bipolar person. I'm curious how you tackled your mental health issues whilst addressing their loved ones issue?

Newman_1 Feeling Worthless
  • replies: 2

I feel like I’m at the end of the road and I mean nothing to anyone anymore, I need help

I feel like I’m at the end of the road and I mean nothing to anyone anymore, I need help

hiIIary i feel unwanted
  • replies: 3

Sometimes i feel unwanted, like a burden who doesn’t belong anywhere, im always randomly getting angry at everyone and they distance themselves away from me. I know i have problems and for the last few years since i was only 8 i’ve been self harming,... View more

Sometimes i feel unwanted, like a burden who doesn’t belong anywhere, im always randomly getting angry at everyone and they distance themselves away from me. I know i have problems and for the last few years since i was only 8 i’ve been self harming, lately i’ve been clean but i can’t hold it anymore. I just want to change my whole personality and i try to hide myself but no matter how hard i try to control myself i just always have to mess something up, its not fair. I just want to end it. i always ask my parents for help but they just brush it off, i matter too. i just really need to talk to somone right noe.