Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Welcome to the Suicide and Self-Harm Section

replies: 0

Hi there, Welcome to the Suicide and Self-Harm section of the Beyond Blue Forums. Life gets pretty hard sometimes, and many people here on the Forums have had times where they have thought about harming themselves or ending their life. This can be a deeply distressing experience, and this section is here to support members who have had these experiences. This section is not a crisis support service. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these Forums. Please call: Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467 (24/7) Lifeline on 13 11 14 (24/7) If it is an emergency, contact emergency services on 000. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for support and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of the Forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. If after a period of time you no longer wish others to engage in the discussion you have started, please use the 'Report Post' button and request the discussion be locked to prevent any further replies. Thank you for being here, we're glad you're here. Treat yourself gently as you read through this section. Beyond Blue

by BeyondBlue •

Community Manager•

Posted in Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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26-06-2026

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

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I don't know where to go, which way to turn. I only see one realistic way out.

replies: 7

Hi, This may be theraputic. Dunno. I don't talk with anyone. I am approaching the greatest crisis point of my miserable life. 4 years ago, my wife of 15 years and I bought our first house, with a large mortgage. 'Twas made possible by the generosity of my mother who basiacally 'advanced' me part of my inheritance. It was a dumb move. We've had a troubled relationship due to never truly being 'in love'. First child was very early in our relationship. Second was a combo of trying to save our flailing relationship, and so our oldest wouldn't be on his own when things fell apart. I'm not without fault, I know. Wife is a control freak with bad anger. So I go along with stuff just to keep the peace. Because I didn't want to ever miss a moment with my kids. We're both bad with money. On the few occasions I've managed to save, she's found it and drained it. Last time was about 3 years ago. Didn't say anything either to keep the peace or because I'm a coward. Both. She would somehow lay the blame at my feet. I was diagnosed with depression years ago & put on meds. I eventually stopped the meds accidentally and felt a fog lift. The diagnosis surprised me as I've always felt how I've felt. Two years into the mortgage, we separated. But remained under the same roof. Earlier this year she had a life-threatening medical episode that has her re-evaluating life, and wanting us out from the same roof. Either sell or rent out the house. Some news yesterday about her life expectancy (which she will not share with me) has seen that come to a head. I've never been driven or decisive. And this is my downfall. I'm $10k in credit card debt. No savings. An average-wage level job. If I had to move out, I'd be sleeping in my car. Our mid-teen daughter wants to live with me. The ex accepts this, but flew off the handle at me for 'swanning around pretending to be the perfect parent', and throwing my mistakes from over a decade ago in my face. I don't think this is true - I'm just nowhere near as strict, impatient or demanding as she is. When she mentioned the life expectancy thing, it was about wanting to be sure our kids would be fine in the future. The only reason I'm still breathing is the kids. This life expectancy stuff has thrown a spanner in my works: it makes my ultimate solution impossibly harder because I can't leave my kids facing the prospect of not having either parent. So, I'm stuck here. I'm the epitome of an abject failure. I have no idea how I can see this through.

i don't know what to do

replies: 2

i have had suicidal and self-harm ideations/tendencies since i was 11. that was the age that i attempted both for the first time. it is 5 years later now, and the thoughts have never stopped. i have continued to self-harm and attempt to end my life since then, and nobody in my life is aware. it has gotten so much worse recently, as my eldest brother passed away earlier this year. the damage it has caused me and my family cannot be explained with words. since then, more things have happened. i have had family members in the hospital for all sorts of reasons, as well as my dog i have had ever since i was a kid passing away too. i am just in so much pain and i am so, so tired. i have also learnt that as of 4 hours ago that i was voted 'least liked' in my group of closest friends, by them. just typical teenager girl things right? i have seen school counsellors throughout my highschool days, but none of them helped or cared about my problems because nothing had 'happened to me'. now that multiple things have, throughout the space of one year, i have tried to see a therapist outside of school so i could talk to someone about these thoughts that i have. it was brought up with my parents, yet it seems to have been forgotten about. i don't want to bring it up again because they have suffered enough this year, and i don't want to add the burden of telling them that i have wished to have been dead for 5 years. i have told my friends the amount of pain i have experienced and am still going through, but i really don't think they care. the thing is, i know that if i ever end up seeing a therapist i will lie to them. i don't want to get into trouble for what i think and feel. i don't want to make my family worry. i just don't want to be here anymore, more than ever. i really don't know what to do. i am so young and i don't think it's fair. i am so angry.

Newbie.

replies: 2

Im not sure im even posting this on the right forum. Please tell me if its not. Hi.... so... upfront.....I have not read through many posts. Im sorry. I just thought I needed an outlet. Dont even know where to begin. Im 44 years old. I have a great (although very stressful) job. 2 grown kids i love. 1 granddaughter I adore. Dating an amazing man for just over 7 yrs. Lost my sister 2 yrs ago from pancreatic cancer. That's when my life fell apart. The hurt is unbearable. Just the last few months.....I took a knife. I had no intention to end my life. I just maybe wanted physical pain to take away the emotional pain.

Struggling

replies: 10

Hi new to this but not in a good place and hoping this may help I’ve always really struggled to talk or ask for help so big step for me to be on this forum and not really sure what to expect or what I may get out of it but hey I’m trying Fair warning it will probably sound like a pity post but that’s not what I want just hoping putting things down might help me 🤷‍ as usual moods up and down but far more down lately and just so tired of it all hasn’t helped but new dramas/issues with my son today has left me exhausted and struggling to find reasons to keep going even just trying for one day at a time just gotta wonder what it’s all about ?? Life I mean..... for me at the moment it’s just trying to get thru another day and try to smile.... trying to manage my chronic pain, no job no money teenage son who is literally doing my head in, PTSD triggers just about every where, very little sleep and spent most of this arvo/night in tears AGAIN and on and on it goes oh and Xmas around the corner which will prob end up with me in tears again and feeling worthless again if last couple of years are any guide mayb I could just sleep right thru and skip a day have an amazing Phychologist who sadly is on annual leave so no one to talk to doesn’t help. Yes I know call mental health ect ect but talking is definitely not my strongest strength even more so when struggling. sorry for rambling on

Help me

replies: 4

I am so lost with my mind, what is funny is my biggest fears in life is death and loosing reality but this year has really been tough on me. I have lost my child, been forced into retirement in my work field due to covid 19 haven’t been paid from work for almost 4months and on top of that was stuck overseas since March (now back thank god) what I am worried about is that I am always thinking about death even though I am scared of it. I keep having weird thoughts about suicide E.G when I see a knife my mind goes 100miles and hr thinking about what if I died from that knife and I go into an panic attack over it and start freaking out why am I thinking about this. Is this suicide thoughts ? Is it just my anxiety I suffer from going into hyper drive. I don’t want to die but I think about it and freaks me out. I just want to be normal and think right again. I cried today for the first time in ages which makes me feel good but I just want to be the old me

Too much pain

replies: 20

Hi just a heads up first that I am safe and in control so no need to worry there. I just wanted to post here because things are really bad for me right now. I have attempted suicide twice over the last 10 years, with both attemps resulting in psych hospital stays. Over the last six months my life has fallen apart again and I'm just finding the pain unbearable. I lost my former step father to suicide last week, and am worried about my half siblings. I've also had a recent breakup and problems with my PhD. I've been able to cope better with the challenges of the last year better than in the past, in that I haven't attempted suicide and do not want to, but the pain has just been so relentless that I often wish I could end my life just to escape it. I just had a chat with my psych and now feel past the worst of it that made me start typing this post a few hours ago, but the pain remains. I'm going skating now as I find that usually helps a bit. I just have to find the strength to stand up and get out of the car. Thanks for reading and I hope you're all managing ok yourselves.

Dont know what to do

replies: 3

I dont even know where to start so this may get real confusing... Im a middle aged male, 3 beautiful children to two ex partners. My most recent separation has really been a kick in the nuts, I left due to emotional abuse that has stuck with me and changed me. Im heavily introverted and struggle to make my own decisions now after being controlled for 8 years by someone else, my emotions are wildly out of wack where i find myself getting overly aggressive over minor inconveniences in life. At the same time I cant help but notice that no matter how hard i try nothing seems to go to plan. For the past week ive convinced myself that ending my life would be the best option, But then I see the smile on my childrens faces and it brings me to tears just thinking of leaving them. Im so torn between making a firm decision that im ready to leave but then imagining them when they realise theyll never see me again...I feel so selfish. I have delt with depression quite bad in the past, ive tried 4 different medications without success and one of the medications actually led to an attempt. I havent been back to the doctors at all, I dont want to keep trying multiple medications I just want to level my emotions out and control myself, control my life again... I feel so helpless, Even while writing this i feel its just a waste of time and that ive forgotten what i even wanted to get off my chest...

Hello

replies: 4

I haven’t posted online in a while, does anyone know of a mental illness that can effect facial abnormality? my temples are really pressed in, the right side of my mouth has dropped a little, I get headaches and overall weakness in my legs and arms.. been to hospital no help, sometimes I take a photo of myself, and I look kind of weird, I don’t look like my healthy normal self I went for a walk today and felt really great, then I got home and had suicidal thoughts again.. Started crying and got a really heavy ball feeling inside my head.. also found out from doctor, that I’m low in iron, on a supplement now.. can iron deficiency cause these problems? wouldn’t hurt myself, but I do pick the acne on my arms a lot. also if I’m doing really well on a project, I’ll delete it out of impulse, and then regret deleting it.

Regret

replies: 2

New here...1st time...need a chat

New here, not sure why

replies: 7

Hello all, First of all i'm not really sure why i am writing this, i think at this point is more for me so i can actually try & make sense of my thoughts and why i feel and think like i do. I am male 43 y.o. I think it would be fair to say I had a rough childhood, ever since i can remember my father was physically, verbally, mentally & emotionally abusive. I was always told that i wasn't good enough & nothing i ever did was good enough. So i guess that is where all this started. So after struggling through my 20's with my issues, maybe that's a stretch, apart from being shy i think i had a fairly normal 20's, but there was always something there always something that held me back from getting married, having kids etc. I think it was because i didn't want to be a terrible husband and terrible father like i experienced and i would always end relationships when it seemed like i could get engaged or have kids. So, at 32 i met the most amazing woman who treated me like i had never been treated before, made me feel like the most important person in the world. A woman who listened to all problems and offered to help me find solutions and we did, i was happy. I should mention that she already had 3 children from a previous marriage & didn't want more, which for me was fine because didn't want to have children because of the environment i was bought up in. So all was good for a few years and then one weekend after the kids had gone back to their fathers she got a phone call from him, apparently one of the girls had said i touched her inappropriately, I will say that i am innocent and the thought is abhorrent to me. To say i was devastated and shocked would be an understatement. I remember for a month i didn't speak a word to her, i guess i blamed her for bringing the kids into my house. So long story short, police were involved, statements made, and there was no evidence but i had an AVO put on me. So after all that blew over and we were still together (per my request, i never had any further contact with her children) & life continues on im in therapy & on anti-depressants. Fast forward to 18 months ago and we break up & i am alone & lonely, with no friends, no-one to talk to & i basically go to work come home sit on the lounge & cry & when i've had enough of that i go to bed and cry until i fall asleep & repeat. I want to end it but i don't have the courage to do it, i dont even lock my doors anymore i lay in bed wishing someone would break in and kill me.

Welcome to the Suicide and Self-Harm Section replies: 0

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

I don't know where to go, which way to turn. I only see one realistic way out. replies: 7

i don't know what to do replies: 2

Newbie. replies: 2

Struggling replies: 10

Help me replies: 4

Too much pain replies: 20

Dont know what to do replies: 3

Hello replies: 4

Regret replies: 2

New here, not sure why replies: 7