Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

lizzie50 13 Reasons Why
  • replies: 17

I'm not sure if anyone has seen the Netflix series 13 reasons why. A young girl stating through tapes 13 reasons that lead to her killing herself, the people involved then reading the tapes. I just finished watching the series and it really hit hard ... View more

I'm not sure if anyone has seen the Netflix series 13 reasons why. A young girl stating through tapes 13 reasons that lead to her killing herself, the people involved then reading the tapes. I just finished watching the series and it really hit hard to home for me, being able to relate to a lot that she went through and feeling like life just doesnt get better. I've had anxiety my whole life and depression severely in the past 6 months due to a nasty breakup with an emotionally abusive narcissist that still feels the need to belittle me and our relationship. I often take to heart what others say about me and care deeply of their opinions of me. Before watching this show, i actually wrote several letters to people who have impacted my life both positively and negatively. I wrote one to my ex that was straight to the point of how he treated me and spoke to me hurt and how much words hurt. He left and broke up with me during a bad time for me when he was the only one i trusted enough to share my darkest thoughts. The letter pointed out all his lies and stories he made up about me, his fears and insecurities that led him to run away. I do blame him for the way i am now, for the emotional and mental abuse. Previously i've pointed out to him what is in the letter and how i have been feeling. It destroyed me even more how he reacted to it. Telling me that all i do is play victim, ive ruined his life, i wouldn't take no as answer, every nasty name you could call someone, liar, cheat, dramatic, over sensitive. He claims he hasn't done anything to me at all, he simply just woke up and didnt want me anymore (lie) Telling me that ive caused my depression, he has nothing to do with me. He said me telling him my dark suicidal thoughts has pushed him over the edge and he doesnt want to deal with me because he cant see why and that im being stupid. That he wouldn't feel guilty cause I am just pretending to be upset to make him feel guilty and sad. My point is that during the series i watched the individuals felt a great deal of guilty for what they had done to her. Why does my ex not see what his done? Why cant he accept his wrongs now rather than when its too late? What goes through a narcissist persons mind to not feel empathy or be mature enough to admit when messing up? I was baffled and heart broken to pour my heart out and get that response. The series really touched my heart and this was playing on my mind.

Gray_13 Feeling really down and struggling
  • replies: 12

Hi guys, I am new to Beyond Blue and to completely honest it has taken me a long time to build up the courage to reach out for advice and help. I am feeling very down and have been having suicidal thoughts over the last month. To give a bit of a back... View more

Hi guys, I am new to Beyond Blue and to completely honest it has taken me a long time to build up the courage to reach out for advice and help. I am feeling very down and have been having suicidal thoughts over the last month. To give a bit of a background, I am a 28 year old male, I was diagnosed with depression as a teenager and spent a few years on anti-depressants which helped me out a lot. As I got older I got quite a bit better but that has all changed recently. I have found that as a male it is really hard to tell people how I am feeling. I feel very alone, and do not entirely trust my friends or the people around me. I feel like they are laughing at me or talking about me behind my back. I know this sounds a bit pathetic but it is how I am feeling and I really needed to get it off my chest. It is really hurting me feeling this way and every single day I start feeling even more down and worthless. i really dont know where to go or who to turn to for help. As I am writing this I am nearly in tears. If anyone on here has ideas about how I can overcome these feelings I would really appreciate any advice. Thanks, Gray

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

shay2 I just want to curl into a ball and die
  • replies: 6

(I have posted a few times) My life is a constant roller coaster of up's and down's. Some days you wouldn't be able to wipe the smile off my face and others you wouldn't even be able to get a smile up there. I have never been pretty or skinny. I have... View more

(I have posted a few times) My life is a constant roller coaster of up's and down's. Some days you wouldn't be able to wipe the smile off my face and others you wouldn't even be able to get a smile up there. I have never been pretty or skinny. I have never had boys falling for me left right and centre and I have never been "ok" with how I look. I am suicidal and I self harm. I just want attention right? No in fact attention is the last thing I seek from the people around me. No one knows how I really feel and I don't plan on telling them any time soon. I guess I'm on here because it's so much easier to talk to a stranger over the internet. There is two boys in my life right now and both I have fallen for. The first one is really attractive and most of the time he is nice to me but sometimes he can be a real d**k to me. He is a very horny guy but I just brush that off as a teenage thing. The second one has been my best friend for 2 years and he's a cool guy, we went out for 3 months then broke up when I started pushing him away because of an eating disorder. I still like him very much and he likes me but the problem is he is leaving to live in Brisbane soon and I don't know if I can do a long distance relationship. I am so lost and I have no idea what to do anymore and it feels like my head is spinning with all these thoughts and voices that make me want to scream. or curl up in a ball and die.