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BeyondBlue Hey there - read this to see what this section is all about
  • replies: 0

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a ... View more

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a negative way. As always, we want to hear your story and how it impacts you and encourage everyone to support each other with kindness. There are a few things to consider when posting in this section so we can all get the most out of it: Everyone’s situation is unique. We all do our best to share what is important in our story but we can never share it all. Let’s be mindful we can’t know all of everyone’s story. Anonymous but public. These posts are available to everyone and while the moderation team keeps the Forums anonymous, posts are still online for everyone to read. Have a think about what you want to share to get the best support for you. Please stay safe. This space is an amazing way to seek support from others who might understand what you are going through. We want to hear how you are going and what is happening for you. Please also consider 1800RESPECT if you don’t feel safe or 000 if you are in danger right now. You deserve to be safe. Thank you again for joining this conversation, your contributions are worthy and important to us here. Beyond Blue

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Breegirl Physically leaving husband - how?
  • replies: 7

Hello I have posted on here on another thread talking about leaving my husband. I had cheated on him which he knows about, we were trying to work things out, I fell out of love along time ago and had tried leaving him twice before but he has a strong... View more

Hello I have posted on here on another thread talking about leaving my husband. I had cheated on him which he knows about, we were trying to work things out, I fell out of love along time ago and had tried leaving him twice before but he has a strong personality and I just stayed for convenience and the kids. I don't want to stay anymore! I spoke to him last night, told him it is over, and that I will leave - he then tells me he wants to take our son and I can have our daughter (that broke my heart) I know it is out of anger and hurt, he then turns it round onto me saying how selfish I am, to try harder and appreciate what I have. I need a few days to rest and rebuild my strength, but I don't know how to get it through to him that it is over, who moves out? Who stays? Do I just get a rental now and move in so he sees how 'real' I am??? I just want to move onto the next phase of this, I hate being in this stagnant place and my 8 year old daughter knows and her anxiety levels are high, all the more reason to get it done ASAP Thank you for listening to my vent, just in a confused place

RosyRose AVO against controlling ex-partner
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I'm reaching out to see if anyone has had a similar experience or can offer any advice. I've recently taken out an AVO against my ex-partner who started stalking me after our breakup. In our relationship he was very controlling, with him... View more

Hi everyone, I'm reaching out to see if anyone has had a similar experience or can offer any advice. I've recently taken out an AVO against my ex-partner who started stalking me after our breakup. In our relationship he was very controlling, with him being verbally, psychologically and on one account physical abusive. Despite showing no interest in me during our relationship, he fought aggressively to get me back whenever I tried to end things. He would get new phone numbers to harass me after I blocked him and even showed up at my door unannounced. Within just five months, I found myself back with him due to his relentless harassment. When I finally broke it off for good, he made it extremely difficult to get rid of him. He followed me to dance events and repeatedly initiated contact despite my clear instructions not to. I often threatened to call the police to get him to back off. During the relationship there was also an issue of him intentionally getting me pregnant. I never wanted anything but an abortion. He refused to use protection, which was always a significant point of contention for me and made me very angry. Some weeks after I blocked him and broke off for good, he sent me an email outlining a detailed plan to get engaged, married, have kids, and buy property together—all within six months. This email came even after I had warned him about calling the police if he didn't stop contacting me. A couple of weeks later, he followed me to another dance event, which was the final straw. His behaviour was incredibly creepy, and I went to the police to get an AVO. He didn't show up at the court hearing and seems to be ignoring the AVO altogether. Now, I'm scared because I know he is very narcissistic and won't take this restriction lightly. I'm worried about potential repercussions since he cannot "lose" or be limited in his movements without reacting. I'm considering removing the AVO, but the police informed me that it can't be revoked through them and would need to go through the court, which could take up to 18 months. Has anyone been through something similar? Do you have any advice on how to handle this situation?

Tillie2 Same sex relationship and ASD and ADHD & PTSD
  • replies: 1

Hi all I have been with my wife for almost 13 years and for the most part has been a wonderful journey. She had a late diagnosis of ASD/ADHD/PTSD after a pretty big burnout. We have had ups and downs during the past 2 years with her discovery that sh... View more

Hi all I have been with my wife for almost 13 years and for the most part has been a wonderful journey. She had a late diagnosis of ASD/ADHD/PTSD after a pretty big burnout. We have had ups and downs during the past 2 years with her discovery that she is not broken and not having to mask up, we have been to counseling. Me on the other hand is struggling to find my way, I have a narcissist mother, feel emotionally disconnected from family and friends and really just can’t find my mojo for much at all really these days, this impacts our connection greatly. Emotionally I am struggling to just get through my days. I have just started talking to a psychologist so I’m hopeful they can help me combat my inner self demons. I guess what I’m asking is when do you know you are done in a relationship.. even though I love her greatly we just can’t seem to get that once truly connection back again and maintain it

JenG My partner has a porn addiction
  • replies: 3

I have just discovered that my boyfriend of 2 years has a porn addiction. My partner and I have only been dating around 2 years now, he’s the kind of person that I love with all my heart and I know he loves me too. We get along so well and it’s too d... View more

I have just discovered that my boyfriend of 2 years has a porn addiction. My partner and I have only been dating around 2 years now, he’s the kind of person that I love with all my heart and I know he loves me too. We get along so well and it’s too difficult to think of life without him in it - the person that I will marry. Our life is virtually perfect - except for the fact that we only have sex once every 2-3 weeks. This is something I’ve talked to him about before as I am always the one trying to initiate but he rejects… this HURTS. We’ve talked about it 4/5 times maybe but last night I snapped and told him to figure out why he doesn’t want to sleep with me and how it shouldn’t be so hard to have sex with the person you love. He finally admitted that he thinks he may have an addiction to porn and that because it’s affecting our relationship that he needs to figure it out. We’ve talked it through a bit but there’s so much I want to know and even more that I don’t. I obviously can’t turn to anyone I know, but I’m a deeply emotional person. He told me how awful it felt for him and that he can’t stop but I know it sounds bad - I don’t know if I can trust that. I’ve made so many ideas for our future and planned to have him in it, I mean it when I say he’s the love of my life but I need some support. I WANT to be able to handle this and help him but it’s hard. I have researched and I know the steps to recovery but I really need someone to tell me everything’s going to be okay. I need someone to tell me he’ll get better and that our future together isn’t going to crash and burn.Please tell me it works out for porn addicts and their relationships.

Guest_12727891 Marriage breakdown
  • replies: 1

The other week I asked my husband to get some medical help and he took it as me ending our marriage. He packed all my stuff up and I had to go live with my daughter , I feel I'm going crazy but there's no going back he has turned everything to be my ... View more

The other week I asked my husband to get some medical help and he took it as me ending our marriage. He packed all my stuff up and I had to go live with my daughter , I feel I'm going crazy but there's no going back he has turned everything to be my fault and now I'm suicidal

Guest_37600340 Insecure girlfriend
  • replies: 1

Hi, I am really struggling. My partner has been through such a hard time. She was in a relationship with an extremely controlling narcissist who was also violent. She has come out of this relationship and was struggling big time. But she is incredibl... View more

Hi, I am really struggling. My partner has been through such a hard time. She was in a relationship with an extremely controlling narcissist who was also violent. She has come out of this relationship and was struggling big time. But she is incredibly strong and resilient. She has two children to him and one of them has severe ASD, ADHD, PTSD and has extremely bad behaviour. He’s around the same age as my son but they are very different and I find myself struggling to put my son with him as I don’t want him to be exposed to those habits and behaviours. This alone has added a challenge to our relationship. She also has extreme insecurities where 1-3 times a month I get accused of something. Not once has it been something that I have done. But she will hear a story from a friend about their partner or her family or a reel on social media and this leads to accusations towards me. at the start I was handling it ok. But after 3 years I’m tired and constantly anxious and feeling like I am on egg shells. I’ve given her my phone password, social media account passwords and deleted anyone that she thought was a threat. I thought this might help her to feel better. It keeps coming. its really hard. If done research, I’ve listened to a ton of podcasts, we’ve seen a gynaecologist to see if it was hormonal. She is finally seeing a psychologist and so am I to see if I can improve anyway that I can and on things that I can do better in. I’m just exhausted and feeling helpless. thank you

SilvaLady Family
  • replies: 1

I have diabetes and mental health issues. Am taking medication for my diabetes, and am generally good diet. But my sister in law can be quite controlling about my diet. I know she is trying to help me, but it can be quite difficult at times and frust... View more

I have diabetes and mental health issues. Am taking medication for my diabetes, and am generally good diet. But my sister in law can be quite controlling about my diet. I know she is trying to help me, but it can be quite difficult at times and frustrating, am not how to deal with this issue.

beyond_confused Found my partners hidden Viagra and currently loosing my mind over it!
  • replies: 3

Has anyone ever found a secret stash their partners sexual enhancement pills in their partners cupboard? Did you ask them about it straight away or did you wait to see when the next time they used one to see if it was with you or someone else? I felt... View more

Has anyone ever found a secret stash their partners sexual enhancement pills in their partners cupboard? Did you ask them about it straight away or did you wait to see when the next time they used one to see if it was with you or someone else? I felt something was off yesterday so I searched for answers and I found them hidden, there's currently three pills missing and I'm loosing my mind as to what to do about it. Any tips or advice would be great... thank you!!!

Guest_27548865 Social
  • replies: 1

I think I am a very nice and approachable person. I have friends, but I never go out with them. I reach out from time to time, and if they ask for help, I always go above and beyond to help sort things out. My coworkers often ask me to go out with th... View more

I think I am a very nice and approachable person. I have friends, but I never go out with them. I reach out from time to time, and if they ask for help, I always go above and beyond to help sort things out. My coworkers often ask me to go out with them, but as much as I want to have deep connections with people, I always end up saying no. How should I connect with people? I really want to change but I don’t know where to start…

Guest_55359737 Please help me leave my marriage
  • replies: 1

How do I leave? What is the process and what happens to the children? Especially when one parent is threatening to take them off the other. How can I make this split amicably?I am enduring abuse, emotionally and mentally. I need a therapist. But I am... View more

How do I leave? What is the process and what happens to the children? Especially when one parent is threatening to take them off the other. How can I make this split amicably?I am enduring abuse, emotionally and mentally. I need a therapist. But I am not sure what kind. I feel like I will just cry at them the entire time.What financial aid is available to single parents in NSW ? I earn an ok wage, but things are so expensive atm I feel financially stuck here.My husband is an angry person at the best of times. He blames me for everything, he berates me like a child. He claims he is a 'traditionalist' this just means that I, as the woman cleans and does everything. As well as work my 40+ hours a week job. I have many reasons I want to leave that i believe would be legit reasons anyone would leave. But I am worried that he will paint me as crazy. That is how he makes me feel. I am in desperate need for help. How did you do it?