Grief and loss

Trust after my daughter's attempted suicide

replies: 6

Hi all, I am a mother of 3 beautiful daughters. My middle daughter attempted suicide last October. It was very very close. I live in a different state from her, and when I discovered a goodbye message on my phone, I called the police and ambulance, w... View more

Hi all, I am a mother of 3 beautiful daughters. My middle daughter attempted suicide last October. It was very very close. I live in a different state from her, and when I discovered a goodbye message on my phone, I called the police and ambulance, who got there just in time.I flew to be with her and stayed with her for 4 months until she was back on her feet. Now back home, I am struggling during the weekends. During the week, I work and am distracted. I am already seeing a psychologist for my own trauma issues. But what I am missing is people who can relate to my experience; how to trust her after this (her suicidal thoughts are chronic, but low-level currently). How do I get that image and the feelings of the moment I read her message out of my head. How I had to plead with the police to enter her property. The feeling of almost losing her is still so raw and it comes up when I am not busy. How have others coped? Thank you for taking the time to read this.

heavily grieving

replies: 11

its been about 3 hours since my dad has been pronounced death and its felt very bitter, particularly since its a public holiday (and a sunday) so everywhere is closed or under a surcharge i hate public holidays, and i hate having to farewell my dad. ... View more

its been about 3 hours since my dad has been pronounced death and its felt very bitter, particularly since its a public holiday (and a sunday) so everywhere is closed or under a surcharge i hate public holidays, and i hate having to farewell my dad. things weren't perfect but now i have to learn life admin things myself, typical adulthood things no one likes to do. i thought now im home i can articulate my sense of frustration but i cant, i just want time to pause so i dont have to worry about everything

I lost my cat and I am lost

replies: 2

Hi guys, I had to put my cat to sleep on Tuesdsy due to heart issues and i feel immense guilt to the point of my body cant function. i am shaking, bursting into tears and pacing the house. i feel sick like i am going go vomit constatntly. I dont want... View more

Hi guys, I had to put my cat to sleep on Tuesdsy due to heart issues and i feel immense guilt to the point of my body cant function. i am shaking, bursting into tears and pacing the house. i feel sick like i am going go vomit constatntly. I dont want to eat but I force myself. i rescused this cat from being surrended two times when he was a kitten and he was a very vocal cat that needed attention, and i was lucky enough to spend most of my days at home with him. ive lost a dog before, but this is different. when you spoke to him he looked you at you, and followed us everywhere as he just wanted to be wrapped up in our arms or by our side whenever he could. The guilt i feel in feeling like I rushed the decision and feeling like i should have brought him home to just be sure he didnt magically get better or last longer is eating me alive. its 3:30am and im up waiting to be woken by him, or looking for a sign hes here. my brain keeps tricking me and telling me hes just outside and he will be in later....i go and double check to see if his little face is waiting at the door to come in. the house is lonely, quiet and i just want him back, if he came back i would be okay, i promise myself that. He was a big emotional support for me too, as i have suffered with anxiety all my life. And everytime i saw him i smiled, lit up and talked to him. I am a broken lady. His was rushed to emergency two months ago, but i thought the issue was fixed. They said his breathing was bad and he would have to go to emergency again and most likely have surgery which would cost a lot, and no promise he would get better or make it. I feel so guilty that i shortened his life and i was meant to protect him like i promised from when i rescued him. xox

Facebook (facecrook) have disabled my account

replies: 2

For 2nd time! "Upon first seeing disabled account message with instruction to "upload a head photo using device camera, in order for us to review the disablement" (don’t know how SIMPLY providing a head photo was meant to aid a review?) Then I get an... View more

For 2nd time! "Upon first seeing disabled account message with instruction to "upload a head photo using device camera, in order for us to review the disablement" (don’t know how SIMPLY providing a head photo was meant to aid a review?) Then I get another message STRAIGHT AFTER submitting the photo.. 'We've disabled your account, we've reviewed your account and found that it still doesn't follow our Community Standards on account integrity. You cannot request another review of this decision' I don’t know if something may’ve in fact gone awry with the process? For I cannot fathom what posts would’ve breached community standards on account integrity!? Given facecrook are continuing to unreasonably strictly enforce their (essentially bogus - arbitrary - self-imposed- subjective) ”community standards” then it should be incumbent upon Facecrook to personally SCREEN EVERY SINGLE POST BEFORE BEING PUBLISHED to obviate the risk of users getting their accounts disabled for posting what may be deemed to (SUBJECTIVELY) not follow community standards!

Grief and loss with possession, belonging, memories. Stuff.

replies: 2

I can't count the amount of times lately I have cried myself to sleep, an exhausted blubbering mess of confusion and so many emotions i dont know to process yet. I need to know I am not alone in this experience. I recently through my own actions put ... View more

I can't count the amount of times lately I have cried myself to sleep, an exhausted blubbering mess of confusion and so many emotions i dont know to process yet. I need to know I am not alone in this experience. I recently through my own actions put trust with someone who I obviously shouldn't and ultimately it led to them throwing out every item I owned except the 1 suit case of clothing I had with me .. this triggers the most regularly when I'm talking with anyone about anything as reflex I want to respond with I am also have this item .. no I don't. How do I start to heal and move on when everything hurts so deep and personal..

I think my sister is dead

replies: 3

sorry for information overload, i want somehwere to unload this, its been weighing me down. i think my sister may be dead.im a child of divorce, my mother had four kids, which i am the youngest one and i fear im the only one alive i dont have memorie... View more

sorry for information overload, i want somehwere to unload this, its been weighing me down. i think my sister may be dead.im a child of divorce, my mother had four kids, which i am the youngest one and i fear im the only one alive i dont have memories growing up with them becuase of my age, but we lived all toghether up until i was 4, they moved to a different country while i stayed in my home country with my mothermy brother had depression, and both of mysisters had muscular dystrophy she stayed in contact with my siblings as best as she could all these years, she'd tell me to say hi and talk to them, i never understood why my sisters couldnt speak and my brother translated what they were trying to say, i thought he had magical pwoers that helped him understand their mumbles and groansacross a time period, my eldest sister stopped shwoing up, i never saw her in the calls anymore, i still dont know whtat happened, but i want to hope that shes not dead, maybe she's being cared for elsewherethenmy brother killed himself a few years ago, i wasnt meant to find out, it was an accident, coinicdence that that was the day my mom dropped me to school, it was terrifying to see my mom break down, i got traumatized by the experience of finding out he diedit was then just my older sister, we'd call her on my way to school and say hi, catch up on her healthher condition got worse, she couldnt even groan anymore, it stung seeing her lay immobile on the bed, they said her condition was getting a bit better thoughand then it stopped, i never see my mom call that number anymore, she doesnt talk about her anymorem not the most mentally stable person, is she not telling me because of that ? i want to ask but i dont know if i should, i dont want to make my momsad either, i love her so much and dont want her to be sad . im scared, and i dont know what to do.

Grieving one's self

replies: 2

Hi there, I was diagnosed firstly with ADHD. This was something I could identify with. Then after two hospital stays I was further diagnosed with Bipolarity and then ASD. Big markers in your life. I also was successful if you could it that with the D... View more

Hi there, I was diagnosed firstly with ADHD. This was something I could identify with. Then after two hospital stays I was further diagnosed with Bipolarity and then ASD. Big markers in your life. I also was successful if you could it that with the DSP. I am losing myself. My brother was killed in 2013 and I was abused by my father. I guess I never really took the fact of my trauma from the abuse given the realtively new diagnosies of me being in my 50s. I have always considered myself young at heart and have great natural connections with the young, animals and seniors. But I am truly lost in all of this.

bereavement

replies: 1

i am nt sure whether this will be approved re stand by bereavement support for survivors of ppl taking their life that u can find via google i learnt of them via a community centre i c a lived experience lady who had a friend pass away they are an ex... View more

i am nt sure whether this will be approved re stand by bereavement support for survivors of ppl taking their life that u can find via google i learnt of them via a community centre i c a lived experience lady who had a friend pass away they are an excellent service

Surrendered puppy

replies: 5

My sister has a dog and I thought i would get a puppy so they can be friends. Her dog is reactive to other dogs so i thought it would be good socialising. Also i wanted a puppy for a long time. I realised on the first day i had this feeling of regret... View more

My sister has a dog and I thought i would get a puppy so they can be friends. Her dog is reactive to other dogs so i thought it would be good socialising. Also i wanted a puppy for a long time. I realised on the first day i had this feeling of regret but pushed thru for my family. But it was affecting my mental health which already wasnt good. Puppies are no joke. My family werent able to help as much as i thought cos they had work&school so it was just me and the puppy alone everyday, setting boundaries, training, enforced naps, etc. I was burnt out, not eating and drinking in the afternoon and started to feel suicidal - which is why I surrendered her 3 months ago only after 10 days of having her. This is after researching that puppies are great at adapting to change and i thought i would rehome earlier than later for her benefit. She was put in foster care straight away from the shelter & quickly found a home with a family with kids. (Had to email shelter to get an update. Im unable to get updates from new family so im just trusting strangers which is smthing ive had to learn from this) I just feel so much guilt for getting my familys hopes up. They wanted her too but werent willing to change their schedules to help. Which is why i also feel let down by them, just an unfortunate situation. Of course no one in the family wants to talk abt it (i tried but theyre very short with their responses) so ive been stuck in my own head for 3 months. It seems like theyve moved on. I miss that puppy and i know logically i did the right thing and i dont regret it but ive just been sad this whole time. Honestly ive progressed so much since then but some days are harder & its constantly on my mind which is draining

Pet loss and grief

replies: 2

My dog of almost 15 years is almost at the end of her life. We're at the stage of deciding when is the right time to let her go. I struggle so much because it never feels like the right time. I do not cope well with loss at all. I can't eat, I cry al... View more

My dog of almost 15 years is almost at the end of her life. We're at the stage of deciding when is the right time to let her go. I struggle so much because it never feels like the right time. I do not cope well with loss at all. I can't eat, I cry all the time. My heart hurts so much. She's been with our family for so long. She was our baby before we had kids. They don't know life without her either.My mum passed away from cancer when I was 16. My daughter also battled cancer as a baby. I know I can get through grief, but man its such a struggle. I seriously hurt so much with things coming to an end. The grief is intense. I feel rage. I hurt so much I just want it all to end so I don't feel this way. Anyway, just wanted to vent and share how I was feeling.

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Welcome to the Grief and Loss section

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