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Depression

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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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misssanonymous I need help.
  • replies: 2

Hi, I've been living in a deep depression for the last 8 years. I've struggled with self harm and attempted suicide numerous times, and I can't remember the last time I actually felt anything other than anger or sadness. I'm only 18, and the first ti... View more

Hi, I've been living in a deep depression for the last 8 years. I've struggled with self harm and attempted suicide numerous times, and I can't remember the last time I actually felt anything other than anger or sadness. I'm only 18, and the first time I attempted to take my life, I was 11. I'm on here because I want to know things that have helped others break out of their slump. I've tried therapy years ago, but quickly stopped when my parents yelled at me because my mental health was costing them, and they weren't seeing fast enough results. I've tried so many different things to break out of my slump, but genuinely cannot find the motivation to seek new ideas or keep them up. I'm unmotivated in life, I have zero interest in the things that used to make me feel like me, and even though I pretend I'm doing better, I'm getting worse. Nobody in my family listens or asks me questions. The only time anything was brought up was when my mum, out of the blue, asked if I was over harming myself. Every time I try to bring up how I'm feeling I'm told it's just hormones and 'we were dramatic teenagers once too'. I'm pushed away, ignored and left to try and change in a home environment that isn't doing anything to change either. My feelings are invalidated to the point where I feel shit for crying or not pretending to be the 'happy, grateful' daughter I should be in a family that treats me like I'm a burden and a disappointment. If I'm not angry or sad I genuinely feel nothing. It feels like my chest and brain are hollow and I'm a mannequin forced to watch everyone else live their lives. I have felt this way for so long, 8 god damn years and I fear it will never change. I'm scared if something doesn't change, ie.my mindset or habits, or even just the way I look at the meaning of life, I'll resort back to self harm, something I was told by parents was a selfish habit. How do I re-find myself? And how can I work up the courage to stand up to my family and seek out help?

shrimper fed up with most things
  • replies: 4

work is getting mean to me, my wifes overseas. im alone and cant see point in life. sorry it its an old cliche

work is getting mean to me, my wifes overseas. im alone and cant see point in life. sorry it its an old cliche

Vix8Six Unmotivated to do anything
  • replies: 1

Hi, I have been feeling so lazy, unmotivated to do anything. Nothing interests me anymore. I make excuses to not go out anywhere or catch up with friends or family. I tend to cancel my shifts for work. All I want to do is lounge around my house eat a... View more

Hi, I have been feeling so lazy, unmotivated to do anything. Nothing interests me anymore. I make excuses to not go out anywhere or catch up with friends or family. I tend to cancel my shifts for work. All I want to do is lounge around my house eat and watch tv. I am a support worker and I am studying towards the disability sector and youth/children/ family Intervention. It’s an effort to complete my studies as I cannot sit still at a computer for long and it bores me. Then I get up and eat! I live in a prime spot across from the beach, I am taking where I live for granted. I have a van where sometimes I take out and go exploring on the coast lay in the back and chill, I go on missions to search for waterfalls and been meaning to go on camping trips….But I feel it’s in the hard basket to even go and do any of that. I have joined yoga and Pilates but I cancel my classes also. When I socialise with my friends drinking beer, I over do it and binge drink to the point where I’m soo drunk and hungover over the next day I definitely don’t get out of bed the whole day. I then feel dirty on myself and spend all day ordering Uber eats. I always say to myself I’m going to be healthy and go for beach walks and join a new class but I then last for a week and fail. Im very inconsistent about keeping things on track. I can never stick to anything. I just feel like a failure, wasting my life and having no direction with myself. Everything is an effort and I can’t be arsed doing anything! How the hell do I get out of this continuous sink hole?

Iamfindingaway Why is my new manager doing this to me?
  • replies: 8

Hello everyone,I'm a new member who's looking for a strong support system. I've been employed by the company for over 16 years and throughout my years of service this is the first time I've been told I'll be performance managed. I've been in the team... View more

Hello everyone,I'm a new member who's looking for a strong support system. I've been employed by the company for over 16 years and throughout my years of service this is the first time I've been told I'll be performance managed. I've been in the team I'm in for 4.5years and in that 4yrs I received good constructive performance review not until within the past few months since my new manager stepped in my performance began to decline. In my mid year performance review my manager gave quite a negative feedback. To begin with, this team I'm in is totally outside my area of expertise. No proper training or mentorship was provided to me. Not a day goes by that I learn something new about the job.I'm completely distraught of the fact that my manager's expectation is that I should know everything. Even when I have clearly express my view of my knowledge gap. I struggle everyday and it makes it even worse when my manager talks down to me, has undertone when she gives feedback, and does not do anything to help me develop. Any help she provide is always thrown back at me as if I'm wasting her time.I have taken many sick days compared to past years. I can't cope of her behaviour towards me. I suffer from depression and anxiety, and ever since all this started happening my mental health state is rapidly deteriorating. My manager knows my medical condition but is not there for emotional support. She made it clear to me that we are to interact professionally. What is happening to me right now is doing so much damage internally. I don't want to resign because the company has been good to me eversince except for my manager.I don't know what to do!

r0b Newbie, having a really tough time
  • replies: 2

Hey all, my name's Rob and I'm new to this forum. I'm going through a really tough time at the moment and thought maybe this would help. I've struggled with depression and anxiety pretty much my whole life (am 45 now). At the start of April I was adm... View more

Hey all, my name's Rob and I'm new to this forum. I'm going through a really tough time at the moment and thought maybe this would help. I've struggled with depression and anxiety pretty much my whole life (am 45 now). At the start of April I was admitted to a private psych ward for a flair up of my depression and I received a course of ECT. I've had 13 treatments in total. It seemed to be really helping me until at the end of my third week in hospital my fiancée turned up one morning and told me that he had had enough, had packed up all his stuff in our house and moved out. We had spent the previous day together and we hung out, watched TV, had dinner at home, cuddled up on the couch, he told me that he loved me; the previous week had been my birthday and he gave me a birthday card and had written on it things like "love you so so much", "my forever man". So after he had dropped me back to hospital that night and said goodbye to me, he drove home, packed up all his stuff and moved out the next morning. I've been completely bind-sided by this and it has left me feeling so hurt and confused. He's left me to pay all the rent on my own, all the bills, everything. I feel like a broken person. I can't stop crying, I'm angry, sad, lonely, anxious, I just feel so lost.We had some relationship counselling last year and that seemed to be going really well. I've seen the counsellor on my own since he left me and told her about a whole heap of stuff and she says his behaviour is narcissistic and I now realise how I was trying so hard to make the relationship work and please him, and the effect this has had on my mental health.I'm so down, and I feel so hurt that my ex was so dishonest with me and broke up with me in such a callous way. I just don't see at this point how I can move on with my life. I'm feeling so isolated and lonely, even though I have a good network of supportive people around me. I just seem to have this overwhelming feeling that I need to keep talking about what's happened in order to make sense of it and to come to terms with it. I see a relationship counsellor, psychologist, and talk to my friends about things but this is just so hard I don't know what to do.Anyway, I thought maybe this forum might help make some sense of things if I put it in writing.Hope everyone is doing well.

Brain_fog Accepting depression…
  • replies: 1

Today was a very low day…I think it is the point I am accepting that I can’t push it down anymore and accepting I am depressed. I have been an angry at my partner for causing my sad moods while he may trigger the feeling he is not responsible for how... View more

Today was a very low day…I think it is the point I am accepting that I can’t push it down anymore and accepting I am depressed. I have been an angry at my partner for causing my sad moods while he may trigger the feeling he is not responsible for how deep I fall although I still blame him when I’m in that full moment of darkness. I am so tired. I don’t want to get out of bed. I walked the dogs and cried and panicked the whole time, this used to be my way to relax! I was physically exhausted by the end it felt like the dogs carried/dragged me home. I was just low and teary all the way to work. Took me 40 minutes to stop the tears and make myself get out of the car. I struggled all day with a gapping hole in my chest. I came home and slept for 2 hours at 4 in the arvo. One small negative email came through and sends me back into a dark hole again, crying and drained. this is me today…and many days now more like this then there is good. I don’t actually know what to do now….that’s why I am here… maybe just writing it down will help, but any advice would be appreciated. I haven’t always felt this way. I have always been hard on myself but not this low and drained and tired. I did have brain surgery a few years ago, then a seizure and now I’m taking keppra which may contribute but I think it’s beyond that now.

white knight Meltdowns, trust your observer
  • replies: 3

I had a major meltdown this week. I've been with Beyondblue for 10 years and a CC for 9, advising others of my lived experience, but nothing much helps when a meltdown comes along. A small trigger is all that set me off, the tone of my wife's voice o... View more

I had a major meltdown this week. I've been with Beyondblue for 10 years and a CC for 9, advising others of my lived experience, but nothing much helps when a meltdown comes along. A small trigger is all that set me off, the tone of my wife's voice over where I'd left an empty soft drink can. During the following hour or so I was off the rails, my whole world was crumbling and at one stage had a swag packed. An indicator of the irrational thinking was that later I emptied that bag to find a change of clothes and a battery drill. I remember putting the drill in there, so why did I? Because I wasnt thinking straight at all. My wife was repeating herself a lot "its not real, Tony you are exploding everything in your mind" and "it's just a can". I was saying "it's how you said it". Yes, I'm extremely sensitive but to the point whereby a tone of voice can set me off like this is frightening. A few days later I'm full of guilt and the reason is obvious, my reactions weren't justified but they are a reflection of 1/ the level of illness my depression can reach 2/ triggers are a topic I need to discuss and find ways to avoid and 3/ I should listen to my carer and friends as to what is reasonable and what I'm catastrophising. The core of my issue is that while catastrophising I'm trying to justify my actions and reactions with beliefs that it isnt my fault, defending myself to the end. But when it happens again I'll remember those words "its not real", because that will tell me my reactions are way off the charts. This event told me that regardless of our experience in mental health that we are not protected from the elements of our illness, the same symptoms all those with depression get. Yes, I fooled myself into believing I'd mastered the diversion necessary to avoid these events. So there is positives in every event and in this instance I will endeavour to "trust my partner" for her observations and judgement. Meltdowns are hard to combat but a good carer deserves our trust, faith and perspective. The least my carer deserves is for me to chill out, take time alone to settle and share a cuppa with a calm talk. Comments? TonyWK

amd1953 A Sad Tale
  • replies: 4

Once upon a time, I used to think how wonderful it would be to be normal, like everyone else around me. To fit in and be accepted for who and what I was. As a child I watched adults for clues on how to behave and what to say to get through life. I ac... View more

Once upon a time, I used to think how wonderful it would be to be normal, like everyone else around me. To fit in and be accepted for who and what I was. As a child I watched adults for clues on how to behave and what to say to get through life. I actually looked up to some of them as role models. But as a child I was always on the outside, looking in. Always the punchbag or the scapegoat or the object of ridicule and humiliation. Always told what to do. Always kicked in the head when I need reassurance about myself. The bullying got worse at high school and it did have an effect on me. I tried to put on a brave face and be happy as though I didn't care if the other kids liked me or not. I used to tell myself that when I became an adult everything would change for the better. Good luck with that one Charlie Brown. Even to this day, I have not discovered one person who has seen me face to face, looked me in the eye and given me the thumbs up for being me. Not once. Never. Ever have I received the nod of approval. With the exception of my friend Emotions26 on this forum I have no one else to talk to on this planet. How sad is that? I've tried being me. I've tried putting myself out there. All to no avail. Nobody wants to know. Nobody cares. I just don't fit anyone's idea of a human being. I used to see myself as a Quasimodo like figure, swinging through the rafters in the Notre Dame Cathedral. Watching everyone else going about their business and living their lives and being happy. I used to ask myself over and over and over again. What is wrong with me that I am invisible. Am I such a wretched human being that I am shunned and despised so readily by everyone I meet?Well, I have all the answers now because I am older and wise than I have ever been before. I know that everyone has good and bad days and how a person feels about themselves is reflected on the community they inhabit. There doesn't have to be something wrong with me for people to be hypocritical, selfish and rude. So now, I have cleared my mind of all the reasons why I used to hate myself. Now I have finally reached the age where I just don't care what goes through other people's minds or what they think of me. That is now history. It's gone. Now I am retired, I don't have to fight with people at work everyday or continually prove what a wonderful guy I am. At last I am free to be me.Finis.

sar97 Depression and relationship
  • replies: 1

I have lived with feelings of depression and anxiety most of my young adult life. I was officially diagnosed 6 months ago with severe depression/anxiety and BPD. As well as having poly cystic ovarian syndrome. I’m in a long-term supportive relationsh... View more

I have lived with feelings of depression and anxiety most of my young adult life. I was officially diagnosed 6 months ago with severe depression/anxiety and BPD. As well as having poly cystic ovarian syndrome. I’m in a long-term supportive relationship with someone who understands and is dealing with their own anxieties and stress. More recently I have felt I have really hit rock bottom emotionally and am giving up on the relationship to the point of thinking about walking away. I don’t want to make any rash decisions while highly emotional. Would anti-depressants be an option for me? I don’t know if my hormones are intensifying these feelings of depression and anxiety as well because I have recently started the OCP again.

Quilter57 Exhaustion
  • replies: 14

I have had major depression and anxiety for years. Currently I am dealing with several major stressors. Also I am obese and drink too much. I am unbelievably exhausted all the time. I have no energy and want to sleep all day. Any ideas of what might ... View more

I have had major depression and anxiety for years. Currently I am dealing with several major stressors. Also I am obese and drink too much. I am unbelievably exhausted all the time. I have no energy and want to sleep all day. Any ideas of what might give me a kick up the bum and get me going again?