Depression

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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
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Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
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I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

Steven1 Worried how I am going to cope when my wife gives birth to child number 2 in a few weeks...
  • replies: 15

Hi everyone. I am relatively new to the forums. Have found it helpful so far (thanks all for your support to those that have written to me). Just need to vent really about my situation at the moment as I am worrying a lot.. I am a 30 year old married... View more

Hi everyone. I am relatively new to the forums. Have found it helpful so far (thanks all for your support to those that have written to me). Just need to vent really about my situation at the moment as I am worrying a lot.. I am a 30 year old married guy with a young son (he will be 3 in May) and my wife is 35 weeks pregnant and will be having our second child in the next few weeks. She is most likely going to have to have a Caesar too so will be needing even more support from me. I work full time doing shift work at all weird and wonderful hours but will get a few weeks off when the baby comes. I have only been on antidepressants about 6 months but have probably been depressed for a few years. Was in denial for a long time. My wife reckons I haven't been the same man since our son was born in 2012 and I tend to agree. As much as I adore and love my son to bits, I have struggled with fatherhood and the way it has changed my life (and our relationship) forever. I feel like I have no time at all for me anymore and am really worried this will get even worse when the baby comes. I am excited about the birth but also really scared! Saw my doctor recently and she thinks I should stay on the tablets for now and thinks I am going to need them for a while. Have recently been trying to increase the amount of physical activity I am doing with some success but can't see it lasting once baby arrives. There just isn't going to be anytime.. I am sure anyone with young kids or kids in general can relate?? Or am I wrong? Finding it very difficult to relax and wind down after work. I come home and it is straight into playing cars, toilet training, cleaning up endless mess and trying to maintain a house, garden and pay bills etc. I know I sound like a real whinger and this is just everyday life, but how am I going to cope with a new born baby on top of all of this too? And try and manage my moods and find time for me. It is going to be a real struggle. Feel sick just thinking about it to be honest.

Just_Lost Not a good day
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Really struggling today....feeling anxious, agitated, cannot concentrate. Today my focus..get through try to be rational and calm... why and how did I get to this place, I pray this gets better.

Really struggling today....feeling anxious, agitated, cannot concentrate. Today my focus..get through try to be rational and calm... why and how did I get to this place, I pray this gets better.

Guest_485 . . . Against Proverbial Walls
  • replies: 17

I hate hearing the term, “you have all the strategies, the rest is up to you”. It genuinely feels like a sinking anchor in my gut. Very rarely do I actually reach out for help, and when I do it is such an incredibly difficult thing to do. I want to b... View more

I hate hearing the term, “you have all the strategies, the rest is up to you”. It genuinely feels like a sinking anchor in my gut. Very rarely do I actually reach out for help, and when I do it is such an incredibly difficult thing to do. I want to be like everyone else must be. I want to light a candle and feel relaxed. I want to meditate and feel at peace. I want to get so lost in the movie that I put on, that I forget why I needed to watch it in the first place. In times like these, I wonder why I can’t be like those people. I know everyone is different, but I can run through my entire list and still come up empty. This whole idea of just sitting with how I feel, that never feels okay with me. If something isn’t right, I want to fix it, you know?? Often times, after attempting to gain support or advice from other professionals, I’m left with empty hands. It just reinforces my worst fear – that I’m too different. I’m too difficult, I’m too messed up. Do you ever experience this?? How do you pull yourself out of slumps when it feels like everything you have tried has failed, and everyone else is stumped too??

Cookie2 Sad, lonely and pushing away the last person I have
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I've always been introverted and enjoy the company of animals over people, I tend to be anti-social, finding excuses to not participate in social events although most people think I am some sort of social butterfly. I have a tendency to be pessimisti... View more

I've always been introverted and enjoy the company of animals over people, I tend to be anti-social, finding excuses to not participate in social events although most people think I am some sort of social butterfly. I have a tendency to be pessimistic yet for some reason people tend to come to me for support for their problems (which I like). I find it easy to be positive for everyone else but myself. I have been this type of supportive person since I was young - initially for Mum and my older brother who needed help due to issues in our own home (i.e domestic violence, emotional abuse, etc)... so I have grown up as someone who is a strong support for others, who never allowed my own vulnerability to show. I was the one who did well with sport and academics, who enjoyed learning and was assumed to be destined for success, etc so even I thought I was a strong person who didn't "need help".The reality is that, I have a lot of self doubt, and I have been a miserable person and have had dark thoughts from a very young age. To be honest I am surprised that I have made it as long as 27. I am insecure most of the time, especially in relationships - and lately more than ever in my marriage. I feel that I have managed my sadness by having at least one good thing... friends/Mum/studies/sport/work etc... not always all at the same time. It is my birthday in a couple of days and upon reflecting on my life... I realise I am at my lowest point because I don't have ANY of those positive things keeping me afloat. I realised over the past 12 months that my friends don't like me all that much. I have stopped contacting them. I have no fitness activities or goals to keep me going like before, despite trying, no motivation. My role at work is unnecessary and I am considered as extra headcount that needs to be shifted elsewhere. I feel like a burden at work. I have a LOT of resentment for my mother for putting me in the position she did at a young age, which she STILL continues to do (she is still with my Dad and they are so horrible to each other).Then it leaves the last person, my husband, my 4 month old marriage, 3.5yr relationship. My biggest worry right now is that I am ruining my relationship with my husband and driving him into depression. I love him so much and I can't see a future without him, but I sincerely believe that he would find happiness with someone else. He could do a lot better, and he deserves much better. Don't know where to begin. I see no light. beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Emma-Lee Struggling, need to talk.
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Hi I'm new to this so please bare with me. I have suffered anxiety and PTSD most of my life and only started treating it 4 years ago. It took my now husband to tell me something wasn't right. My family always told me I was just emotional and overthin... View more

Hi I'm new to this so please bare with me. I have suffered anxiety and PTSD most of my life and only started treating it 4 years ago. It took my now husband to tell me something wasn't right. My family always told me I was just emotional and overthinking everything and made me believe what I felt was what everyone felt. i successfully went onto medication and sort help with a psychologist and everything was getting better despite how hard it was to talk about how I felt and The abuse I had been through as a child. last year my psychologist decided it was time to reduce my sessions and to call her when I needed her instead. I convinced myself I was doing great I was happy and confident and had convinced my self I was fine. I had even struggled with depression when I lost my grandfather last year and she felt I came through ok. In this last week I feel different I feel as though the depression has been creeping back and I've just been telling myself I'm ok, and convincing others the same. i honestly did not have a great childhood and now I do have a loving and caring husband who works so hard to give us the world and tries so hard to understand what I'm going through. But I know I make it very hard for him sometimes, I'm just feel neutral or down a lot of the time and have been constantly sick of late which has thrown off my medication and made things worse. I've been to Drs and now need to see a psychiatrist to change my meds. I don't feel I need my psychologist but I do feel lost and embarrassed that I have fallen back into this state that I tried so hard to convince myself I wasn't in. Basically I just want to know if there is anyone that can relate, I just feel really alone at the moment even though my husband and work collegues are telling me they understand I just feel alone.

Bakers_wife It's just to much
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Help! I'm 25 with two kids, a husband & a business. I can't say that life is easy for me but I do have what a lot of people dream of but I can't seem to enjoy what I have worked for. Each day I wake I can barely put my thoughts together. After I have... View more

Help! I'm 25 with two kids, a husband & a business. I can't say that life is easy for me but I do have what a lot of people dream of but I can't seem to enjoy what I have worked for. Each day I wake I can barely put my thoughts together. After I have sorted my daughter for school. And got my son ready for either daycare or just a busy day with mum. My days are often spent fixing problems with in my business. I'm either trying to get paper work done or ordering or baking or cleaning no matter what I'm there everyday. If I was to pick up and leave not only would the place full apart but my anxiety just goes through the roof!!!! I strive to make things work but it all comes pilling on top. Then to top work of my husband family work with us from time to time when "they need" us. For years I feel as if I have never been good enough for his family. I feel has if they tear at me. Try to pull down my walls. I don't know what it is they want but my husband is always on there side. I feel so lost. Alone.Afraid. I feel as if I'm meant to be a hole In The wall. A memory not a person. After work is done its time for me to rush round picking kids up. Doing dinner trying to get the reading done. The washing done for school the next day. Keeping the house up to scratch. Only to put the kids to bed. By myself and not know if tonight I will sleep for 4 hours or 6 sometimes 2 hours sometimes my days flow from one to the next. I feel lost. I feel empty. I can't find happiness and my kids feel it the most my temper is short and my weight is at an all time low. I don't eat. I don't sleep an I'm afraid of what's next. I am alone in my own battle with myself. I'm suffocating and don't know what to do next

thomasle1984 Recently diagnosed with depression
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Hi All, My name is Tom. 30 years old and divorced for over year. I was diagnosed with depression months ago, when my mind and body started to shutdown. My mind couldnt string one though together and my anxiety actually would be at the point of making... View more

Hi All, My name is Tom. 30 years old and divorced for over year. I was diagnosed with depression months ago, when my mind and body started to shutdown. My mind couldnt string one though together and my anxiety actually would be at the point of making my body and voice physically shake. Since being on my medication it had improved, however over the last couple of days I have really struggled again. At times I cant think straight and when i do it gets negative.Its such a battle, and a battle I think i have fought for years before asking for help. Im tired of my thoughts, my anxiety. I just wish for peace and quiet.. Thank you for just letting me speak what is in my mind. Iwould not wish this on anyone... Take care and I hope you keep fighting your battle.Tom

aap Too much to fix
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Hello i have visited BB quite a bit but have only just signed up. I have been seeing a counsellor for issues at work , over the last year, and I have been making some improvements as far as things not getting to me as much, although I have lost my pa... View more

Hello i have visited BB quite a bit but have only just signed up. I have been seeing a counsellor for issues at work , over the last year, and I have been making some improvements as far as things not getting to me as much, although I have lost my passion for my job as a result. I have a supportive husband and son who is 21 and a teenage daughter who is busy being a teenage girl I have had serious health issues over the years that seem to be resolving themselves but my problem is there still seems too much to fix. Despite having a good immediate family I don't have that relationship with my extended family, on both sides they live away and aren't interested. My friends prefer to stay at home rather than go out and I feel I have no family, friends or workmates that I can talk to about my mental state ,work issues or even just go out with on a regular basis. My son whom I am very close to is moving out soon and I know it is the next phase of his life, but I am feeling for my own loss as he truly is good company and understands me.( his moving out has been the instigation for signing up as I am devastated for myself and happy for him) Sometimes I feel there is too much to fix about my life as I have been trying to work on many things over a number of years and am getting tired of it all. I feel very lonely often and as I am so unhappy at work this compounds the problem. I need help to fix my loneliness, learn to let go of things and have some peace where I am not trying to rectify some part of me that is not right. Any ideas ?

rhiannon13 Mental health spiraling back down again
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I thought my depression and anxiety was getting better, I've been seeing a psychiatrist for the past year and after agreeing that my mental health was getting back on the right track I've stopped having sessions. That was 2 months ago and the first m... View more

I thought my depression and anxiety was getting better, I've been seeing a psychiatrist for the past year and after agreeing that my mental health was getting back on the right track I've stopped having sessions. That was 2 months ago and the first month leading into the new year I felt so happy and felt like I was slowly escaping it all. But this last month has just had my mental health spiraling back down again and I've found myself in the worst states and I don't know what to do about it. I was taken into hospital last week while on holiday with some friends and thinking back to that night and the mental place I was in scares me so much. I know I need to go back to my doctor but thinking about talking to anyone always makes me so nervous. I'm stuck on what to do and feel as if I've taken 100 steps back and sat at square one again..

AlexClaire I feel very alone.
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Hi Guys,Where to start. I'll try to keep it brief.I' m 28, have suffered with depression for the last 10 years caused by a head injury when I was 18. Been on medication off and on since then but have been on the highest dose for around 4 years, I am ... View more

Hi Guys,Where to start. I'll try to keep it brief.I' m 28, have suffered with depression for the last 10 years caused by a head injury when I was 18. Been on medication off and on since then but have been on the highest dose for around 4 years, I am been completely off it for the last 2 months. I am struggling. So so much. I have only been in Australia for just under two months having moved over with my boyfriend of over 3 years. There are a lot of firsts with this. First time we have lived together just the two of us, first time we have moved across the other side of the world together, first time I have been unemployed in a while etc etc. I'm really struggling. I' m so alone, spending so much time alone as he works 5 days a week, he has his mother and his sister here, I have nobody, I don't know anybody, we have so little money I'm trying not to spend anything so am not going out. He says I have a 'bad attitude'. That I'm being defeatist and negative about everything. Which is true. My mother is a very negative person and I think it's brushed off on me rather nicely. I'm taking everything out on him because there IS nobody else to take anything out on. I literally don't talk to anyone else unless it's on skype or whatever. And that's not talking. I just don' t know what to do, I'm not even really sure why I'm writing this I know other people have it much worse. I just have nobody. Why can I not just see the positives in life? Is my current mood just an effect of not being medicated in which case should I have stayed on them? I'm fairly sure we're nearing break up because he says he can't be around negative people. Then in which case, I'm across the other side of the world all alone and don't have the money to go back home. So. Honestly though, I am feeling very defeatist today. I would be quite happy if the world came and swallowed me up because right now its just to much pain and uncertainty. beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}