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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Jess19925 Have I or haven't I?
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone, I'm looking for some clarification or explanation for my behaviour/feelings. I'm not sure whether I would be classified depressed and/or anxious. I am a uni student in my last year of study currently on placement. (Perhaps ironically) My... View more

Hi everyone, I'm looking for some clarification or explanation for my behaviour/feelings. I'm not sure whether I would be classified depressed and/or anxious. I am a uni student in my last year of study currently on placement. (Perhaps ironically) My degree is in welfare and I am really interested in exploring mental health and disability avenues for employment. My mother had depression when I was around 10 and recovered, although not without the help of antidepressants which she used for several years. My situation involves me being very stressed because of a lack of time, motivation and energy. Placement is very fast-paced, and very challenging. I am doing a job that I can sometimes feel overwhelmed by for a number of reasons. 1, the work is challenging and I am still learning. 2, all the things I do have fast deadlines, which can be stressful, especially because those deadlines are my supervisor's deadlines, not mine. That gives me a feeling of guilt when I am not working as fast as I need to be. 3, the job requires me to wake up early (5:15am, 2 days a week) and coupled with my paid job (bartending day and night shifts, 3-4 times per week) I can be very tired. This combination of factors can lead me to be anxious some mornings, with one instance leading me to call in sick one day to placement. I have also got feelings of being flat, miserable, irritable, sad, exhaustion and episodes of crying without any provocation. I have had instances where I would tear up randomly and I would have to fight off a fit of crying. I have had instances where I've just thought everything is just too hard. Please let me stress that I don't mean this in regard to life itself. I do not have suicidal thoughts or thoughts of harming myself or others. I have called in sick to my paid work more than once because I just couldn't see myself turning up to work and forcing myself to smile for the patrons and other staff. I have told my partner about these feelings as we live together and I know it's not healthy to try to keep feelings like this to myself. However, I don't think he completely understands the gravity of what I'm saying, or maybe he doesn't know what to do. The bottom line is I haven't seen a professional yet as I'm not sure if I would be classed as anxious and/or depressed and I'm not too keen to speak to a stranger about something so personal. Also, I don't want to speak to my family as I don't want them to worry (yet), especially given the family history.

Shazzydazzy stuck with it
  • replies: 5

hey. So I post here now and again and read people's stories. I have a wife and I don't like sharing things. Like depression and bad stuff that used to happen to me. So I talk to people online about it and it makes me feel better. The problem is she's... View more

hey. So I post here now and again and read people's stories. I have a wife and I don't like sharing things. Like depression and bad stuff that used to happen to me. So I talk to people online about it and it makes me feel better. The problem is she's insecure. So when I talk to people about it I do it discretely. I don't want to bring it up with her and I don't want her to know about my old life. I tell people I can't remember anything from before I was 16. Anyhow she caught me taking to someone and immediately went ballistic. She doesn't like me talking to people online. up till 2 am getting blasted Because I won't share anything with her or take about it. The thing is I don't want to talk about it. I just want anon people to listen and not judge so I can keep living normally. I don't want anything in my past to get dragged up ever. And I don't want to share. I guess I'm just venting but how do you convey to someone there's a part of you they will never know and you'll never share it with them. Without them feeling rejected. Especially when shes your wife. How do you explain to them how depressed you get and it's natural. They've had a perfect life. No medical issues. No abuse. No trauma. Like someone with PTSD I get angry at her when she wants to talk and I really don't want to. How would a soldier talking about what he did in the war and the things he's seen and had done to him help... it wouldn't. I just don't know what to do. I feel like I want to be normal but I'm being forced. It doesn't help that she's insecure and thinks I cheat on her even though I tell her I don't I just talk to people. And I don't want to tell her about how I talk to people and talk on forums because I don't want her reading the things I type mainly to protect her from myself Because I'm afraid she might leave me if she found out. I feel so ashamed I can't just be normal.

Broken_stooge How I knew it was time to get serious about help.
  • replies: 2

Today after another day of being in the pit I decided to try and cheer myself up with a lollie at home. As I ate it, the wrapper asked: "What's your favourite thing about a person in this room?" As I sat there in a room on my own, I could think of no... View more

Today after another day of being in the pit I decided to try and cheer myself up with a lollie at home. As I ate it, the wrapper asked: "What's your favourite thing about a person in this room?" As I sat there in a room on my own, I could think of nothing I liked, let alone my favourite thing. Today I realised I need to get serious about help.

Daisycqt The physical struggle each day
  • replies: 4

Does anyone else struggle physically each day? I feel like to just get up and move, putting one foot in front of the other, even drawing breath a real struggle. I've worked one way or another since I was 6 years old, but now if I had to "go to work" ... View more

Does anyone else struggle physically each day? I feel like to just get up and move, putting one foot in front of the other, even drawing breath a real struggle. I've worked one way or another since I was 6 years old, but now if I had to "go to work" I doubt I coukd even make it to the car without collapsing. Every little thing, even taking a shower, seems to take so much energy I just can't do it. Does anyone else have this?

Daisycqt Why are you not smiling-you used to be so funny
  • replies: 3

Ever since I was a child I was told " you eldest sister had the brains, your next sister is beautiful, but never mind you're the funny one". A tag which has annoyed me all my life as I'm not a blasted clown. Since my depressions got worse and I've sl... View more

Ever since I was a child I was told " you eldest sister had the brains, your next sister is beautiful, but never mind you're the funny one". A tag which has annoyed me all my life as I'm not a blasted clown. Since my depressions got worse and I've slowed down physically and mentally, I'm getting reminded of this even more, especially when I cant be all bright and happy. Even right now, after telling family I am fine, not cross, I've just been told "I don't care what you say, something's making you cross right now because you are not all happy and smiling" which means either I've got to pretend to be happy or I'll end up in a fight in about 3 hours or so. I can't handle a fight so I'll slap on a smile and then everyone else will feel ok while I'm crying inside. Why can't I just be how I feel? Why are their feelings more important than mine?

Charteuse Scared of hospital
  • replies: 4

I have been on and off many different anti depressants for nearly 20 years . First diagnosed as post natal after my mum died in awful circumstances during the pregnancy of my first child. I have always thought of myself as resilient and determined de... View more

I have been on and off many different anti depressants for nearly 20 years . First diagnosed as post natal after my mum died in awful circumstances during the pregnancy of my first child. I have always thought of myself as resilient and determined despite a very difficult child hood and have succeed career wise . I have a great husband and wonderful healthy kids. I don't like relying on meds because of hang up over my mum's addictive behaviors ( which killed her) but every few years it seems to come back. A horrible depressive episode. It seems I can be that adventurous, positive , spontaneous Mum. Wife and colleague. I can take on projects and succeed at high levels in the workplace with loads of energy and then I can be back here, a horrible person, irritable, angry, full of self loathing and despair after my despicable outbursts. I just ride the the ups and downs and apologies a lot to my family when I know I have been unreasonable. (God knows how I control it in the workplace but I seem better at controlling outbursts there)This time it has got so bad my husband said he has had enough, he has since said he doesn't mean it ,but I don't blame him. tI haven't been able to go to work or do anything for a week. Tomorrow I am likely to be admitted to hospital. I told them I want to go because I can't cope anymore and I don't want to do this to my family. I don't want my kids seeing me like this. I am hoping someone is going to tell me that going to hospital is a good decision. I will do all the therapy courses an someone will assess me and give the right medication and I will come out and it will be all good again. A few people,have told me it could be really traumatic and I should try to heal myself at home.

Indoril Trying my best.
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone. This is the first time I have ever opened up about myself. I've tried to do so in the past with friends and family but it makes them uncomfortable. I am really struggling with everything at the moment. I have no career prospects, I've lo... View more

Hi everyone. This is the first time I have ever opened up about myself. I've tried to do so in the past with friends and family but it makes them uncomfortable. I am really struggling with everything at the moment. I have no career prospects, I've lost job after job. I cannot feel anything any more. Is this normal? I have been so tired and weary - I don't know what to do. I've never asked for help before.

Molly_the_fish Help: Your thoughts and what you've done in the past
  • replies: 7

I have been told I had depression before, over 5 years ago. I never felt like it really went away.Tonight I feel like I have 'cracked'i feel like I am on the verge of crying all the time. My arms feel heavy. Breathing hurts. I want to tear all my hai... View more

I have been told I had depression before, over 5 years ago. I never felt like it really went away.Tonight I feel like I have 'cracked'i feel like I am on the verge of crying all the time. My arms feel heavy. Breathing hurts. I want to tear all my hair out. Am I crazy? Have I lost it? I feel like a failure. I will never amount to anything. Everything I try I fail at. I have no direction in my life and it's terrifying. I don't know what I want, or where I want to go, so I have no direction I feel like a failure. I called my mother to talk it through and everything she said is true, I am capable of success. I guess my failure is my own fault, it my doing, I am the only one to blame. How can I stop feeling like this, it's so heavy it's crushing me. I can't see the end. I can't see the point of going on. Please, I just want to hear your stories of what you have done to give me hope. Thanks beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Fearful Fearful I will never get better again
  • replies: 31

Hi thereI'm new. I posted 2 posts here last week but they were removed by BB - my word count was too long. So I'm starting again Thanks to the two people who replied to me I appreciate your support but can't remember your names sorry. One of you said... View more

Hi thereI'm new. I posted 2 posts here last week but they were removed by BB - my word count was too long. So I'm starting again Thanks to the two people who replied to me I appreciate your support but can't remember your names sorry. One of you said I haven't gained control of my thoughts and I'm wondering if you can clarify how I can do that please? as its a skill I definitely need to learn. I'm a 58 yr old female & very frustrated that at my age I still haven't got my crap together!!!! I've suffered from anxiety & depression all my life but only 15 yrs ago diagnosed & treated with meds and psychology. 18 months ago after a prolonged period of stress and mental struggles, I slipped into severe chronic depression and anxiety and had to give up work. I had no motivation for anything, didn't want to get out of bed and felt anxious about everything. I couldn't see any point in life. Nothing (even my lovely friends and pets) seemed worth living for. I had no appetite and diarrhoea. It's a very scary way to feel as I'm sure you're all aware. I've felt that way before but it's never lasted more than a few weeks. I find it so scary that it has lasted so long and hence my fear that I'll never get better this time.I live on my own & have no family but have several good friends. With the support of 2 wonderful friends I survived the last 18 months, and 3 months ago took up part time work which is going ok tho most days I'm forcing myself to go so I'm not actually enjoying it yet. But I know it's good for me to have the income & social interaction. Although I've improved and I now have good days where I feel like my old self (that's such a wonderful feeling!!). I can't seem to hold onto it no matter how I try and, after a few days I slip back into the deep black hole again. I'm trying really hard to be well - forcie myself to push through feelings to socialise & achieve things, to eat & exercise. Do other self help stuff such as take Tumeric, omega 3's, drink water, monitor thoughts. I hate my life. It's really getting me down and I'm afraid im never going to get better no matter how hard I try. My psychiatrist says coming out of it is an up and down process not a smooth path so that helps explain it a bit. I just hate that gloomy/anxious feeling that is always in the background waiting to smother me. I feel It's my fault I must be doing something wrong.Have you been through similar and recovered? PLEASE tell me how you did it.

LSP77 Will I ever feel normal again ?
  • replies: 2

Hi all just want to tell my story, I've had anxiety for as long as I can remember. I was a painfully shy and self conscious child and teenager, I had very few friends and found it very hard to relate to girls. I met my now ex husband when I was 18 an... View more

Hi all just want to tell my story, I've had anxiety for as long as I can remember. I was a painfully shy and self conscious child and teenager, I had very few friends and found it very hard to relate to girls. I met my now ex husband when I was 18 and moved in with him after 2 weeks together. We had 3 children and we're together for 16 years before he left. Although we were both unhappy, him leaving absolutely devastated me, I'd lost my family. I was diagnosed with PND in 2006 after my 2nd child was born, and have been on AD ever since. Since the breakup I slipped into a deep depression and life has been a constant battle ever since. I've let myself go, put on 20kgs and generally hate myself. When I'm having a really down episode, I won't leave the house, I feel very anxious, I sleep a lot, and just lock myself away from the world. I have 3 healthy, beautiful and happy kids, but I'm scared I have damaged them as they saw me hit rock bottom. The only reason I'm still walking this earth is because of them. I know I need to exercise to be healthier mentally and physically, but the thought of going to a gym or walking the streets makes me so anxious, I'm so grateful to have a roof over my head, food on the table and healthy kids, but the constant struggles in my head make it hard to be happy. Anyway enough of my whinging, have a great day.