Depression

Has anyone else experienced this...?

replies: 11

Once in a blue moon I realise that I am real, feel real and feel alive and literally have a lot of free space in my head. The last two times it lasted 10-15 minutes, depends how much I try to keep the feeling in my head. But after 15 minutes the feel... View more

Once in a blue moon I realise that I am real, feel real and feel alive and literally have a lot of free space in my head. The last two times it lasted 10-15 minutes, depends how much I try to keep the feeling in my head. But after 15 minutes the feeling is almost completely invisible to me and I can barely remember how I felt in that period. I experienced this scenario 3-4 times over 3 years. The first time was when I arrived home from an operation on my abdominal region, where I realised that I am depressed and worrying too much in life. I saw a physciatrist and was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression, where I am currently still visiting and on prescribed SSRI. As anyone felt like this, and is this even a real feeling or am I cooked?

List of triggers for depression

replies: 5

Hi all After 2 years of being on the forums I have noticed several major things- 1) depression can affect anyone 2) however more often than not there is a trigger preceding it ie family, financial, work, health & other indicators 3) many people strug... View more

Hi all After 2 years of being on the forums I have noticed several major things- 1) depression can affect anyone 2) however more often than not there is a trigger preceding it ie family, financial, work, health & other indicators 3) many people struggle with the diagnosis initially 4) some have a predisposition to depression 5) some have depression due to external factors, others may be genetically disposed, others may suffer seemingly "out of nowhere". From my own humble understanding & making generalisations, it would appear most often that preceding events contribute greatly to depression. This includes grief, low confidence, high self expectations which cause us to feel badly about ourselves if we don't meet our expectations, life events & situations that distress us. Poor confidence, a tendency to isolate ourselves & guilt about accepting we have an illness all contribute to our poor self esteem. We are our own worst critics. We internalise our negative sense of self. We struggle with accepting our diagnosis-often thinking it is a negative reflection of our selves. Thats just a few observations. In understanding & accepting ourselves others may have ideas. After all we each battle to understand & live with our illness. please add your thoughts. Mares X

2016 - what a start...diagnosis of depression

replies: 9

If you had said to me a week ago I’d be posting this on public forum I would have laughed at you. Really I would have. On the ground type laughing. But here it is, the start of my journey to recovery. I’m a middle aged male, married, good kids, pets,... View more

If you had said to me a week ago I’d be posting this on public forum I would have laughed at you. Really I would have. On the ground type laughing. But here it is, the start of my journey to recovery. I’m a middle aged male, married, good kids, pets, educated, secure job, and house – on the surface living the middle class Australian dream. What on earth have I got to complain about right? Well, for years I had a sense of loathing that even extended to shaving in the shower as to avoid seeing my reflection in the mirror. I had wondered ‘what if I wasn’t here?’ no one would really notice. Sure, my family would be devastated, but as everyone does when they lose a loved one they’ll move on, and life returns to normal...after the first anniversary I would just become a sad, distant memory. This despair escalated in late 2015 with work pressures ramping up. I was missing deadlines, yet excelling in managing some urgent situations so it was excused. I had seen my GP a few times over the preceding months, and was desperate for him to ask me how I was going...On reflection, I probably would have lied anyway. I reached out to a psychologist under the guise of wanting to be a better person - she immediately saw through my well-rehearsed front. For the first time ever really, someone saw the real me. Saw the fatigue. Saw the deep sadness and pain that was my everyday life. I eventually relayed most of the above, crying half the time in front of a woman I’d only minutes ago previously just met. She also convinced me to revisit my GP. She made me promise to her that I stay safe. Why would she need to do that? My GP was shocked that I had held off seeking help for so long, and he quickly, firmly, and compassionately arrived at a diagnosis of depression. Again I was asked to stay safe – why do people keep saying that? 6-7 weeks on and it is still tough going. The medication has kicked in; am sleeping a lot better, am calmer. My breathing rate has decreased, and I don’t feel like I am in a constant state of ‘fight or flight’. Gave up caffeine cold turkey. I had a plan to keep all of this from my wife and friends. My psychologist was having none that nonsense. So clearly trusting people was a big leap for me. But I have done it. I (now) understand it is ‘ok not to be ok’. I have an illness that for whatever reason chose me, and I won’t let it define or limit who I am. Oh, and by the way, I am indeed depressed. Vita (latin for ‘life)

Worthless

replies: 527

Hello I am wanting to know if anyone else feels just worthless. And what they did about that feeling that creeps inside of you. Thanks

Feeling elated and happy!

replies: 15

Hi all, I've been feeling so very down for a good few months and today i've had a momentary release - something so beautiful and I want to share that because you guys on this forum are really important to me. Tonight I came runner up in an art award,... View more

Hi all, I've been feeling so very down for a good few months and today i've had a momentary release - something so beautiful and I want to share that because you guys on this forum are really important to me. Tonight I came runner up in an art award, for a public artwork i made, and i'm so excited!!!! it is so empowering to have people acknowledge my ideas and my work. The piece was about a prominent female historical figure who overcame significant obstacles and opposition to excel in her field in what was a male-dominated profession at that time. It was also in support of marriage equality. And lastly is was about following one's passions and dreams - not waiting - and having the courage to do this. It was kind of a statement about me returning to uni to do visual art, and having the courage to pursue an occupation in the arts. But i guess what led me to post here is to share that even when everything feels bleak and hopeless, things can happen that light up our joy, even if they are only fleeting. And amazingly when I accepted the award I chose to make a little speech into the microphone (eek, first time!) and I radiated my joy and passion for art... in fact i wanted to keep talking but decided a few mins was enough... even though i am in the middle of a horrible depression episode and have no confidence in myself... it was truly remarkable! Kindness and joy to you all, Christina

Depression and the "snowball effect"

replies: 7

Imagine you are in a room with 9 other strangers. All of you have mental or emotional struggles of various types. You have all had different lives with different backgrounds. You sit there wondering what to say. One person begins to ramble on about n... View more

Imagine you are in a room with 9 other strangers. All of you have mental or emotional struggles of various types. You have all had different lives with different backgrounds. You sit there wondering what to say. One person begins to ramble on about nothing in particular…not making much sense hence no replies are given. One young woman begins to cry. She becomes visibly distraught and at that point some of the others begin to comfort her. As she calms she mentions why she got upset and others begin to reply ….the snowball of interaction has begun to grow. The conversations extend to nearly all, some prefer to keep quiet but they are at least- listening. We’ve often mentioned in this forum the need to get the “mix” right. The mix being proper diagnosis, the correct medications and the right doses, a calmer environment, a more suitable career, better working hours, a shield against the cruel and toxic and professional ongoing treatment. This forum could be said to be in that “mix”. Why? Because not only can some ask questions and get a reply quickly but you are contributing to the gathering of this little community with the same ambitions, to help each other find ways to cope. I would suggest however, that your participation to give to others comfort in few words with a reply is not only helping them….it is a tonic for YOU. Since being on this forum I’ve found it an important part of my own therapy. Giving to others in the form of referring to your own life’s struggles, your childhood or your genes can be such a relief for those searching for answers. By replying or even pressing that red button to say it has helped you, adds to that snowball of support and you help it grow. You might not realise how significant a few words could be. Today I read in a thread I started replies from two contributors on this site, words of thankyou that my own words helped them in their journeys. Its all part of that snowball and its tendency to grow when others chip in. And that snowball helps you the thread starter as much as the person reading it. There is no difference to anyone here, we are all one snowball with our arms reaching out with open arm for others to jump in. That my friends....is the snowball effect. For some, a vital addition to the "mix" required for a healthy mind. You are reading this....welcome to the snowball. A world where your contribution however small adds to its ability to keep going. Tony WK

I get jealous of people as some have great lives and I wish I had their luck

replies: 2

I've been depressed lately and it's just frustrating. I've had illness and it's taken me 2yrs and it's taking so slow. I had to give up my job and now I need to find another job but I'm not sure what to do. With my age I'm afraid that I'm to old for ... View more

I've been depressed lately and it's just frustrating. I've had illness and it's taken me 2yrs and it's taking so slow. I had to give up my job and now I need to find another job but I'm not sure what to do. With my age I'm afraid that I'm to old for somebody to take me on. I'm just upset as most of my so called friends don't call me or chat to me. Which is sad but what can I do. I think I let my partner down my family don't chat to me or ask how I'm doing which at time hurts. I'm thinking of moving to another city but with no employment or $$$$$ it's hard and frustrating. I get jealous of people as some have great life's and I wish I had there luck.

feeling alone, scared and disconnected

replies: 28

i'm not really sure what else to say, i just hate how difficult i find it to be myself around people, and how i always seems to put on this front of being all okay and superficial, i dunno, not really showing my true self. and that means i get so lon... View more

i'm not really sure what else to say, i just hate how difficult i find it to be myself around people, and how i always seems to put on this front of being all okay and superficial, i dunno, not really showing my true self. and that means i get so lonely not really connecting to people. i wish i could change this, its something I've done since i was a kid. it feels so lonely to not truly connect. if only animals were human and then i'd have no problems, i feel so safe in their presence Gosh this thing called life is difficult to understand at times.

Depression-the first steps

replies: 4

After fighting depression on and off for 5 years, I finally opened up to my friend about it. It's tough and I don't no wat to do next

feeling deflated

replies: 6

Today I have no motivation to do anything. I know I need to get up and start cleaning, organise dinner etc... But on the otherhand saying I cant be bothered I dont care So am feeling annoyed and angry and down because im not myself How do I get on wi... View more

Today I have no motivation to do anything. I know I need to get up and start cleaning, organise dinner etc... But on the otherhand saying I cant be bothered I dont care So am feeling annoyed and angry and down because im not myself How do I get on with my day ? Any suggestions would help ☺

Pinned discussions

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SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION

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All discussions

Has anyone else experienced this...?

replies: 11

List of triggers for depression

replies: 5