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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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GemAndLogan I want to run away
  • replies: 2

I suffer from severe depression and take medication. It has been controlled but over the last two years my life has been in turmoil and I feel powerless to do anything about it. I lost my mum (who was also my best friend) to cancer, then my gran to o... View more

I suffer from severe depression and take medication. It has been controlled but over the last two years my life has been in turmoil and I feel powerless to do anything about it. I lost my mum (who was also my best friend) to cancer, then my gran to old age, then my partner to an ice addiction which also resulted in him making bad choices and our home being raided and turned upside down twice by the police and then me having to go to court. I've never committed a crime or had any negative dealings with the police so this was very frightening for me on top of my partner acting like a crazy person. Although things have settled down a bit, I never feel okay anymore. I'm constantly effected by my depression and always have this strong urge to just get in my car and drive away and detach myself from everyone and everything and just start over. I feel like I'm losing my mind. I feel like I've watched my life go downhill and couldn't do anything about it. Any suggestions for bouncing back? I know a lot of people put there have been through a lot so how did you get back to feeling normal? Thanks so much!

girl_interrupted Learning to forgive myself
  • replies: 6

I've never shared this with any of my friends. When I was a young, naive teenager I feel pregnant to the type of guy you wouldn't bring home to meet the parents. Being so young, I struggled greatly with coming to terms with the gravity of being respo... View more

I've never shared this with any of my friends. When I was a young, naive teenager I feel pregnant to the type of guy you wouldn't bring home to meet the parents. Being so young, I struggled greatly with coming to terms with the gravity of being responsible for another human being, but also felt the overwhelming excitement of creating a little person and being a mum. All those maternal instincts kicking in and so many hormones and emotions going on for me all at once. After much counseling and consideration I decided to terminate the pregnancy. The pain of carrying to full term and then giving up the child for adoption was too great for me, and I was not fit to raise a child on my own. Looking back, I felt a lot of pressure from my family and the counselor in my decision but I knew it was the right thing to do at the time, for many reasons. It kind of felt like the easy way out. But I agonized over my decision, and I've spent most of my life hating myself and regretting it. I never forgave myself. I had nightmares for years and still now I get a deep pang of guilt and shame when I think about it. I do wonder how different my life would be if I had chosen a different path. I feel like such a selfish, horrible human being. I had a choice and maybe it was the wrong choice, but at the time I was not able to make those decisions for myself. I guess we all make poor choices in life and have to learn from them. Trying hard to let go. I'm learning to forgive myself. It's hard tho.

Switchoff My own stigma and judgement
  • replies: 1

So I finally went to my GP and have been prescribed antidepressants for my depression. I work in a job where I'm "the brave hero" I often attend jobs to assist people who aren't coping and even jobs where help was to late. The thought of "us" not cop... View more

So I finally went to my GP and have been prescribed antidepressants for my depression. I work in a job where I'm "the brave hero" I often attend jobs to assist people who aren't coping and even jobs where help was to late. The thought of "us" not coping is a subject my colleague don't discuss as we are supposed to be the strong brave ones. When I am the brave one I know I don't judge the people who ask for my help. But now I'm the one needing help and judging myself. I feel like I'm only half a person, not normal and compleatly different and detached especially from my work colleagues and don't really want to admit what's going on in my head. I feel like if my colleagues knew what was going on none of them would want to work along side me. However if the shoe was on the other foot I wouldn't have an issue. Any one else had this type of struggle, any ideas on how to change my mind set?

AlysiumDream Quit My Job Due To Bipolar And Anxiety But...
  • replies: 3

I recently left my job because of bipolar disorder and anxiety but I feel as though I made a mistake. It's an excuse and I allowed it to rule me. Let me preface this by saying I have been working in CS (customer service) for 20+ years and HATE it but... View more

I recently left my job because of bipolar disorder and anxiety but I feel as though I made a mistake. It's an excuse and I allowed it to rule me. Let me preface this by saying I have been working in CS (customer service) for 20+ years and HATE it but now I am sitting around doing nothing, and I had a job! I stayed in it longer than most jobs and now I ruined it again. Now I'm broke and unhappy and this stupid vicious cycle keeps turning - I'm putting weight on thanks to the medication and half the time I just wish I could disappear and stop being such a loser... Sorry, just venting

Aziah Depression is a catch 22
  • replies: 2

I thought coming to terms with my depression would be a big step forward in recovery rather than ignoring it and spiralling further into an episode. What I've found is the opposite, I have 3 months off and I was wondering if anyone else experiences t... View more

I thought coming to terms with my depression would be a big step forward in recovery rather than ignoring it and spiralling further into an episode. What I've found is the opposite, I have 3 months off and I was wondering if anyone else experiences the same feelings as me. I have so much time on my hands to think, the longer I isolate myself the more unrealistic and unenthusiastic to leave the house I become and thus the more isolated I become. Despite knowing exactly what I can do to alleviate some of the body image stress that contributes to my episode, I can't do it because my depression gives me know energy and fearful of failure. Everyone is all or nothing with my depression- I can't eat balanced it's either trash or starvation, 100% work ethic or nothing because everything that isn't black or white requires too much effort or thinking- depression is making me one dimensional and it is making me resent everybody in my life because everywhere I look everyone is happy and I am struggling

Oceanlover Help! I don't know where to turn
  • replies: 7

I live in a very remote town in WA. I've never reached out for help with my mental health but this time I just can't seem to get out of the black hole on my own. I have a beautiful life with a loving husband but inside me is a black hole that sucks a... View more

I live in a very remote town in WA. I've never reached out for help with my mental health but this time I just can't seem to get out of the black hole on my own. I have a beautiful life with a loving husband but inside me is a black hole that sucks all the positivity out of me. I can usually bring myself through but it's bern getting worse this year. I can't find happiness, contentment, I'm worrying about small things, my confidence is slipping away, I'm becoming anti social, my motivation in work is zero, my brain feels all fuzzy and all i want to do is sleep or watch mind numbing tv shows. I must be a complete misery to live with for my poor husband and I just want to feel normal again. I just don't know where to start with getting help in Australia and my remote town. I've worked in mental health services in the uk so I know where to look online but i feel I'm past self help. Can anyone recommend a service that provides video chat or something?

-Fisho- Getting things of my chest
  • replies: 6

Ok,So, I'm new to this forum and just trying different things to help me understand things more about myself. I really just want to dive into things and avoid too much back story, but I feel in any case this is going to be a long post. I have a huge ... View more

Ok,So, I'm new to this forum and just trying different things to help me understand things more about myself. I really just want to dive into things and avoid too much back story, but I feel in any case this is going to be a long post. I have a huge list of things that I feel needs to be attended to, but one that has impacted me the most lately has been a huge struggle in concentration, focus and memory. I don't know why or what exactly is the main cause but it is seriously frustrating for me. It lost me jobs in the past, it makes it finding employment in general near impossible. I stutter my word, have trouble thinking on the spot and blank out frequently in conversation and even at times forget what I was talking about mid sentence. Which makes almost every social encounter or interview stressful and strenuous, as I try to avoid coming of like a complete idiot. I thought it may have been caused by depression, as I have heard memory fog and fatigue is a common symptom for depression/Anxiety and stress. Which I have been diagnosed with in the past. This year I made a huge effort to try and overcome my depression. Spent more time with friends and going to gym almost every day. However, I still feel fatigued, lazy and dumb. I still feel mindless and I can't seem to change that. I still struggle with forcing myself to think and remember things. I don't feel as bad as I have in the past, in fact I felt like my depression was almost completely gone. I still have breakdowns like once a month. But the days in between I feel happier. But, I feel like this lack in concentration is going to be what buries me again. It's hard to explain how I feel, it's like I'm always tired but I get plenty of sleep. It's like my brain just doesn't think any knowledge is important enough to store. My mind is always foggy, I'm constantly catching myself spacing out and having to re-adjust my focus only to lose it again. It's just like my brain is switched off, it doesn't want to work no matter what I do. I've tried reading books, watching documentaries.. and I end up giving up because I get half way through and can rarely recall any of it. It's so annoying, and has such a huge impact on me in every aspect of my life. Both work related and socially. I live in an irrational fear of coming of dumb or an idiot to everyone I meet... I'll need to continue this in the comments..

dee_1 Made redundant at work - not coping at all
  • replies: 2

Good afternoon This week, I've had one of the worst weeks in a while. To go back what has happened this week, there is a lady that works for us, she is a training co-ordinator and I'm a receptionist. I'm not sure why, but this lady feels the need to ... View more

Good afternoon This week, I've had one of the worst weeks in a while. To go back what has happened this week, there is a lady that works for us, she is a training co-ordinator and I'm a receptionist. I'm not sure why, but this lady feels the need to talk to me like I'm beneath her. I've not done anything wrong to this lady, I've respected her and do as she says, fair enough I make my mistakes which probably annoy her but I don't feel like it's necessary to talk to me like a child. This behaviour of hers, has been happening for a few months now. She's nice to me but when some thing bugs her or "I'm not doing my job right" she will ensure to let me know how disappointed she is with me. After she spoke to me in quite a bitchy tone, I went down stairs to my office but I had a massive panic attack. I was crying and upset, I was just trying to do my job and this women shuts me down. I mustered up every courage I could, to go to my bosses office and inform him of the way she speaks to me and treats me. Then the worst topic, of all...came up. The industry that I work in, a training company that delivers qualifications, gets a portion of government funding to deliver subsidised training to those in NSW. Apparently, the company won't be getting as much money to deliver courses to our regional area and there fore my boss has had to make a "regrettable" decision to retrench me. I'm in a state of shock and anger because - even though my boss said it had affected 2 others apart from me, in the workplace - the other two "retrenched" workers, will do odd jobs around the place for him. Now, on top of everything else, I feel like my boss is lying to me - because even though he says his decision was incredibly hard, I feel like it wasn't. Over the course of 4 months of what's happened to me at work: - My boss hired a new woman to work with us to take some load of my shoulders as I was taking a lot of tasks and responsibilities on my own and doing things that I wasn't qualified for -Slowly, but surely some of those responsibilities were taken off me, however more and more skills and responsibilities were fading from me...the training coordinator was taking everything on; leaving me with not much to do. - My boss during this time was a little stand off-ish towards me and not talking to me much...avoiding me...not introducing me to clients that walked into our business. I'm feeling lost and upset because I need this job. I don't know how to accept what's happened

mariah4 Antenatal Depression
  • replies: 2

Hi, I'm 23, 27 weeks pregnant and am suffering from prenatal depression. I have a loving family and partner but I have never felt so alone in my life. I don't resent my child, I just feel numb and severely sad. I am aware that hormones play a particu... View more

Hi, I'm 23, 27 weeks pregnant and am suffering from prenatal depression. I have a loving family and partner but I have never felt so alone in my life. I don't resent my child, I just feel numb and severely sad. I am aware that hormones play a particular role, I have been depressed before and I know that how I am feeling is beyond hormonal changes. I just don't want to feel so isolated and want this pain to go away.

spunkyturtle BPD - childlike
  • replies: 43

I turn 35 this week and am so frustrated lately, I feel like a 12 year old. I live with my parents, Mum bosses me around and tells me what to do like a 12 year old then Dad takes over and does things for me like I'm a child. If I don't do the dishes ... View more

I turn 35 this week and am so frustrated lately, I feel like a 12 year old. I live with my parents, Mum bosses me around and tells me what to do like a 12 year old then Dad takes over and does things for me like I'm a child. If I don't do the dishes pronto by a certain time, he takes over amongst other things. They went away for 12 days in August and I looked after my disabled brother, it was nice to have responsibility and if I didn't do something it just sat there until I did. the house is being sold and dad mentioned paying out my debt, I'm just waiting to see what happens so I can decide my next move. Anyone else feel like a big child? Any advice?!?!