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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Skyshay Depressed woman with an even more depressed male partner
  • replies: 3

I am reaching out for some tips or to gain more perspective about depression. I have depression and am responding well to medications and therapy. I feel great. My partner entered into the darkest place yet. been going on about 7 months now its overw... View more

I am reaching out for some tips or to gain more perspective about depression. I have depression and am responding well to medications and therapy. I feel great. My partner entered into the darkest place yet. been going on about 7 months now its overwhelming for him and i. He admitted he needed help which was amazing as he never has before and is back on the game in terms of trial and error of medications. The side effects hit him like a tonne of bricks i feel so mich pain for him. Always tired, Headaches upset tummy. And no change to his mood. Still trying to find the combo for him. He gave up years ago after 3 years on unsuccessful medications.He uses marajuana as it is the only thing that keeps him calm. Alot of it and i dont like condoning it. But i do beacuse when he doesnt have it nothing can ease his cripling amxiety. His anger and anxiety is causing me frustration. We have dogs to help us. He is linked at the hip to them both and he doesnt like walking due to weight gain. Lake of motivation. Anxiety. Especially anxiety about the dogs. Other people walking their dogs. He doesnt seem to trust me walking them. I am a bit more go with the flow now that i am feeling more like myself. I love the dogs but i am able of leaving them for a holiday in the right hands of freinds and dog hotels... but he will never accept that. I can cope for a while but i am struggling to see a way clear I cant even take the dogs for a walk cause he gets upset and anxious and begs me to understand his perspective but i am at the point now where i need to walk them with or without him for their health. Not mine or his. Theirs. Its the same for shopping. Sometimes i bite my tongue from saying just get over yourself and come. The dogs are fine. But i know how much thay would piss me off when i am in my own hole. However after a certain length of time i struggle to be as easy going to just accept it.His mother is here and she helps out at home cookinf cleaning etc and it makes him annoyed cause her cleaning makes him feel bad. I appreciate it so much. I am exhausted with coping to work and manage myself and look after myself aswell as being there and support. I am jist getting exhausted of so much anxiety and negativity from him.We cant drive anywhere far. If we do ever walk the dogs its stressful and he is full of anxiety and makes a scene and i cannot tell him to be logical. He usually is logical Any advice from someone in a similar boat ever. Advice from a male who can relate?

Andy82 I'm not sure?
  • replies: 12

Hi all, Just did the typical 'Dr Google' and typed into the text box, "I don't have anything that interests me" - top hit - this website. I'm not entirely sure if I have depression, however here is my story. A few years ago I suffered a shoulder inju... View more

Hi all, Just did the typical 'Dr Google' and typed into the text box, "I don't have anything that interests me" - top hit - this website. I'm not entirely sure if I have depression, however here is my story. A few years ago I suffered a shoulder injury which required surgery and a lot of rehabilitation and has not returned to normal function. A year or two later my wife and I welcomed our beautiful daughter, and I subsequently took a new job elevating to Management in a large company and we purchased our first home. Sounds like a good progression right? Now two years later, I don't have anything that interests me, or motivates me. My job is very demanding and I feel a void moving away from the engineering role I was previously in. I work long hours, and look after my daughter on the weekends (which I love, however can be exhausting after a long week). My wife and I also have another girl on the way which is exciting, however I don't feel the same excitement I did with my first daughter, I'm not sure whether this is because I'm so busy or not! Prior to all of this I was happy, motivated and generally enjoyed things. I feel it's the job I'm in which is possibly bringing me down, however it's making me feel terrible at times. I find myself lazy, taking shortcuts not doing day to day things like organising a car service - it just seems too hard. Sorry for the long post. Not sure who to chat to before I see someone. Thanks.

Cabbage_Patch_Kid Tips for when it all just seems to much and the emotions are too strong and I feel hopeless
  • replies: 1

I’ve suffered depression for over 20 years but in the last 10months my depression has gotten worse. Lately I feel like my body mind and heart can’t deal with how I’m feeling at the moment. I feel like I’m at capacity and I just don’t know what to do.... View more

I’ve suffered depression for over 20 years but in the last 10months my depression has gotten worse. Lately I feel like my body mind and heart can’t deal with how I’m feeling at the moment. I feel like I’m at capacity and I just don’t know what to do. Most mornings I wake up vomiting and then I cry most days. I’m exhausted and can barely do anything. I’m finding it hard to see that I will get better and get my life back. I don’t want to feel this way and some days I would do anything not to feel so sad and depressed. can anyone help?

WaterVeil Is this real?
  • replies: 3

Hi All, I'm new here. I've had depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I'm well, I'm a zainy, intelligent, creative people person but I'm going through a particularly long patch of depression. I just really needed someone today but... View more

Hi All, I'm new here. I've had depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I'm well, I'm a zainy, intelligent, creative people person but I'm going through a particularly long patch of depression. I just really needed someone today but discussing this is pretty exhausting, especially when it's in person, so I'm posting here instead. I'm tired of being sad. I'm tired of carrying it. I'm just so tired. The most difficult thing is that I feel like I have no options. It's not like there is anything tangible to point at to say, "See, look, there you go I'm actually sick". Half the time I think I'm just making it up and that, if I weren't so lazy, I could be happy and productive if I needed to. I feel like the people around me expect so much and that on the days where I'm sinking in it, which at the moment is most days, I just can't do it. I think they will think I'm incompetent, lazy or negligent. I want to have a big open wound to point at so I can say, "Look that's why I couldn't get that work done over the weekend" or "See that's why I couldn't pick up the phone when you called". So I guess my question to you all is. Is this real? Is it as tangible as having pneumonia or cancer or breaking a bone? and How do I keep going on with so much weight on my shoulders? In sincerity, WaterVeil

Polpetto Telling your partner about your depression
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, Just recently joined the forum and would really appreciate some advice or have someone share with me their experience of telling their partner about their depression. A little about me: I am a male, 25 years old and ex-military. I was di... View more

Hi everyone, Just recently joined the forum and would really appreciate some advice or have someone share with me their experience of telling their partner about their depression. A little about me: I am a male, 25 years old and ex-military. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and Social Anxiety Disorder in 2015 following my return from an overseas deployment to the middle-east. Early this year I was diagnosed with ADHD sub-type inattentive following a neuropsychological assessment. As of today, my social anxiety disorder is quite well-managed thanks to some CBT that I received a few years ago however, my depression has been ongoing since 2015 and I have been on and off medication since then. As for my ADHD, I currently am trying to find the right treatment to alleviate my symptoms through medication. I'm on my 2nd trial of stimulant medication, but I am finding that it has been hard to find a middle ground between the benefit and negative symptoms associated with the stimulant medication. I am currently taking two medications daily, though to little effect towards controlling my symptoms. As time goes by I find that my depression, though sporadic, has become worse and the medication is doing little to help. I feel that quite soon I am going to find it very difficult to cope and will need more support, with the potential for admission to a mental health facility. This issue I have is that as a result, I will no longer be able to hide my condition from my partner. We've been together almost 3 years now and are engaged, we both want a future together and a family. I, however, can't come to terms with telling her about my depression. Regardless of how irrational it may seem, I feel that as a man I need to be strong and be able to carry this burden on my own. I feel like by telling my partner about my condition it will change the dynamic of our relationship, and that her perception of me will change from her provider and protector to someone she can't look towards for strength, that my reactions to an event from then on will be indicative of my condition. Once that has happened there will be no going back from it and I will be forever constrained to that persona. I figure that if anyone can give me some advice or share their experiences with telling their partner of their condition it may help me take the necessary step towards talking with her about it. Hope to hear from you guys soon. Regards, K

Jaysquizzle Not sure what’s wrong with me.
  • replies: 1

I’m 30 years old. I’ve been feeling weird and depressed since I was a little boy. I’ve never been able to make friends. I have a few who live far away from me, but I am so lonely in the small town I moved to for work. I cant talk to someone unless th... View more

I’m 30 years old. I’ve been feeling weird and depressed since I was a little boy. I’ve never been able to make friends. I have a few who live far away from me, but I am so lonely in the small town I moved to for work. I cant talk to someone unless they talk to me first, and even then I can’t look them in the eye. I have no social skills. I’ve never been interested in drinking or going to pubs, I feel too anxious in crowds. I don’t have many hobbies and have always worked myself hard at work since age 17. The men who work for me are in their sixties, so we have nothing in common. I cling to women and constantly feel petrified of being left alone. My current partner has cheated on me with three different men and I let her get away with it because I can not bare to come home to an empty house and then spend years alone here with my own thoughts.

Frogman78 Depressed feeling tired lonely scared and grieving at the same time feel free to reply my need a little bit of help I think
  • replies: 3

Hi home well just like to say that my lost my mum just over 2 weeks ago to bowel cancer and grieving in the bed depression has seen again as 6 months ago today I lost my partner which she was 32 and we have a little 4 year old together which my mothe... View more

Hi home well just like to say that my lost my mum just over 2 weeks ago to bowel cancer and grieving in the bed depression has seen again as 6 months ago today I lost my partner which she was 32 and we have a little 4 year old together which my mother-in-law and father in law look after as I'm a quadriplegic to top things off I don't know which way to turn like I said I'm tired and scared I'm lonely feeling worthless I don't know what to do don't know who to talk to my doctor says no I have to talk to someone maybe this is a first step of talking to someone I don't know but I just want things to be easier things are so hard at the moment really hard I just don't want to get out of bed I just don't want to do anything I don't want to go anywhere I don't want to talk to no one I don't want to see no one how do I fix this problem I will be sitting there and all the sudden just burst into tears for no reason and cry and cry and cry sometimes for an hour or two I don't think I can cry anymore I done up crying in the last few weeks to do me my lifetime am I doing the right thing I starting here that's what I don't know maybe you might have a response and an answer for me or even guidance that would be lovely well we'll see how things go from here talk to you soon guys please feel free to reply

Amber1991 Stuck again
  • replies: 2

Hi Everyone, just needing a place to vent. I’m 27 female from Australia. I work as a senior support worker and my work is always busy but I love it. I’m scared that I’m not going to get the promotion I have been working towards because I’ve been havi... View more

Hi Everyone, just needing a place to vent. I’m 27 female from Australia. I work as a senior support worker and my work is always busy but I love it. I’m scared that I’m not going to get the promotion I have been working towards because I’ve been having too many days off work. My boss hasn’t said anything to me about it yet but I know he will soon. Sometimes after the weekend I get in that much of a rut that I can’t muster up the motivation to go to work on Monday, and then that turns in to Tuesday, and then sometimes even Wednesday. I use health reasons as my excuse but it’s really because I can’t even imagine going to work when I feel like this. I get so nervous about what my boss will say when I text in sick that I turn my phone off all day. When I’m at work I’m an excellent employee and am well liked, no one would guess that I get so low outside of work. I’ve been self sabotaging by eating junk food, smoking too much weed and not exercising. I feel guilty because I haven’t been taking my dog for walks and she is putting on weight. I lost 20 kilos and was feeling great, now I’ve thrown all that down the drain and have completely turned my lifestyle around to what it used to be. I’ve recently put on 9 kilos and an feeling disgusted in myself and how I’m treating myself. I haven’t been in a relationship in over 3 years because I can’t imagine being in a relationship with someone. I’m too used to my current lifestyle and don’t like being around people when I get home from work. I also feel like I’m too fat and unattractive for anyone to want me. People tell me that I look fine and I’m being hard on myself but I feel like I’m huge and ugly. Sometimes I feel like I’m trapped in a prison and can’t leave the house. I stay on the lounge and don’t get up all day except for eating and going to the toilet. I’m supposed to be studying but I haven’t even started and it’s already halfway through the course. This makes it the 2nd time I will have failed the course because I’m unmotivated. It’s strange that I am such a good worker and am such a different person at work but I’m so scared of losing my job and the money I’ve gotten used to that I try my best at work but when I get in these moods my performance drops. I’ve been thinking about seeking therapy again but the thought of it is also exhausting.

blackflywonder My family makes me depressed but they are only trying to help
  • replies: 4

I am currently suffering depression and have suffered from it multiple times in the past. I've been trying to narrow down why I am depressed as the causes are hard to pinpoint this time. After seeing my phycologist today, I was home alone and I was s... View more

I am currently suffering depression and have suffered from it multiple times in the past. I've been trying to narrow down why I am depressed as the causes are hard to pinpoint this time. After seeing my phycologist today, I was home alone and I was starting to feel a bit better. As soon as my brother came home from school, followed by my parents, my mood dropped and I felt depressed again. Looking back on the past 3 months since I've gotten depressed, when my family try to assist me, they make me feel even more depressed and I just want to get away from them. I have such a good relationship with my family and would never want to upset them and vise versa. I am confused why my family make me feel worst when they honestly aren't doing anything wrong to upset me. I will start to feel a bit better when I am home alone but as soon as a family member comes home, I fall back down and into my shell without them even saying a word. Has anyone else felt this? Could it have something to do with me needing some personal space to work things out?

Lalaleelu Help re: Overcoming Depressive Patterns and Moving Forward :)
  • replies: 5

Hi all, Until recently I was a high-functioning depressive. I am 20 years old an was studying law at university and working as a paralegal. Unfortunately, because I was ignoring my own wellbeing I worked myself into a really bad state and decided to ... View more

Hi all, Until recently I was a high-functioning depressive. I am 20 years old an was studying law at university and working as a paralegal. Unfortunately, because I was ignoring my own wellbeing I worked myself into a really bad state and decided to discontinue work and study. When I no longer had work to do I began binge-eating every day. Now I have put on 20kg and feel pretty disgusting about myself. At this point I know I would like to try something new. I am interested in finding a part-time job and beginning to study nursing (it's something I have wanted to do since I was admitted to hospital for mental health reasons and the nurses were amazing). The only problem is I have lost all of my self-esteem and feel embarrassed to go in public looking the way I do now. It's really difficult because I want to take the steps to get better but am so down on myself that it's making it very hard. It's especially hard for me because I was recovering from an eating disorder when I began binge eating and it's really provoked a lot of negative thoughts. Does anyone have experience in overcoming this kind of situation or any tips on how to deal with this? I really want to move forward with my life, but find myself getting sucked back in to the same old patterns Thank you