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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Juliepie Feeling really helpless
  • replies: 2

Hello, I'm new to this forum I'm not really sure if this is in the right spot as I haven't been officially diagnosed or anything or seen anyone about this. I've always felt like I am a failure though, I can't reach parent expectations, I feel estrang... View more

Hello, I'm new to this forum I'm not really sure if this is in the right spot as I haven't been officially diagnosed or anything or seen anyone about this. I've always felt like I am a failure though, I can't reach parent expectations, I feel estranged from my friendship groups. I don't articulate well when talking to people outside and while I'm at work. I don't really know how to improve or where to go from here and can't help but blame myself for the fact that I am the way I am or anything I do never turns out well and that everyone around me secretly dislikes me. I'm in my 20s and I feel like I should be able to accept or not care whether I'm liked or not, or carry on after messing up but it continuously eats me up inside and it's like a repetitive and vicious cycle that happens constantly every week or two. I have really hated myself for awhile now and feeling very alone as there is nobody I feel close enough to talk to about how I'm feeling and I'm not sure what I can do about me.

Dejena Wasting time
  • replies: 8

How do I stop wasting my time?

How do I stop wasting my time?

batticus I am stuck in the past
  • replies: 3

Hi all I'm not sure if anyone else is like this. When I get depressed which unfortunately can be quite often, I become fixated on the past. In particular there was a time in 2009/10 where I was happier than I've ever been. I was only young, 17 or so ... View more

Hi all I'm not sure if anyone else is like this. When I get depressed which unfortunately can be quite often, I become fixated on the past. In particular there was a time in 2009/10 where I was happier than I've ever been. I was only young, 17 or so back then. Most notably I had just started my first 'relationship'.... we held hands a few times... so relationship might be a stretch, but it meant the world to me. As far as I was concerned she was perfect. It was period of a few months where I couldn't have been happier. I remember so much of that time in vivid detail. Things went very downhill not long after, that's when I was diagnosed with severe depression and I landed up in hospital on more than one occasion. I'm doing well now but it's a battle. My current relationship is not good. While I love my partner she sadly is almost certainly a covert narcissist. It's taken me the best part of 5 years to figure that out. All the time I thought I was in some way defective. I wrote a separate thread about that as that is presenting issues of its own. I guess this triggers me to experience depressive episodes at times. I guess it's safe to say the last 5 years have been very hard. When I have these episodes I start going through old photos, emails etc. from this time. Even going as far as mapping out what events occurred on what day. Almost trying to take myself back. At first I thought it's just reminiscing; which I guess it is; but I think I'm stuck. Honestly I'd give everything to go back to that time again. Sometimes I even drive to locations where significant things may have happened. I try so hard to go back. I know I'm seeing the present through a depressed lens at the moment and that's probably part of the issue. Does anyone have any advice so I can 'snap out' of this? While I enjoy the nostalgia I fear it's becoming a bit of an obsessive thing and isn't doing me any good.

maddy7890 breakup regret
  • replies: 3

Hi there, I am currently at the lowest point i’ve ever been in my life and i’m just looking for some advice i guess. I have been in a happy and loving relationship for the past two years and he was everything i could ever want. however, i am very men... View more

Hi there, I am currently at the lowest point i’ve ever been in my life and i’m just looking for some advice i guess. I have been in a happy and loving relationship for the past two years and he was everything i could ever want. however, i am very mentally unstable and it appears i have bpd/ptsd (waiting for diagnosis). as a result of my poor mental health i said and did a lot of things to my partner that i deeply regret and i told him i wanted to break up. he didn’t want to leave and held on for 3 months and he recently decided he wasn’t in love with me anymore and has to move on because what i did to him is unforgivable. basically i wanted to break up with him and now i regret it a lot. now that he's really gone, i’m the most depressed and suicidal i’ve ever been in my life. i haven’t eaten in over a week and i’ve been crying so much i physically can’t cry anymore, no tears come out. i can’t imagine moving on and not having him in my life anymore and i feel so stupid for everything i’ve done. i’m really struggling at the moment as i honestly have no friends, he was my only friend and i pushed him away. now i have no one. how can i let him go and how can i move on? i really cant imagine life without him and the thought of him moving on and seeing other people makes me feel physically sick. thank you

Bethy_Bee Am I suffering Depression?
  • replies: 2

My mum pointed out today- 'Do you have depression' during an argument. Since then, I've been wondering to myself if I do have depression or if its just a silly personality trait I have. Its too difficult for me to visit a GP, but at the same time I d... View more

My mum pointed out today- 'Do you have depression' during an argument. Since then, I've been wondering to myself if I do have depression or if its just a silly personality trait I have. Its too difficult for me to visit a GP, but at the same time I don't trust the 'tests' you can do online. So i'd rather ask what everyone else had to say. Here is a reference to some of things I go though. Firstly, I over sleep big time. Go to bed at 12-3, but i sleep in till about 1pm (non work days). Very unhealthy sleep schedule, i know, I either oversleep or under-sleep. And I am usually still tired 50% of the week. My diet is also very terrible, I don't eat in the day, usually skip breakfast and lunch but then I overeat at night time. I tell myself I need to change, but I have no motivation. My relationship with my mum isn't great at all, and it doesnt help that she doesn't have the best of filters. So now everytime i see her, i think "what will she say next?" She's clearly addresed to me im overweight and lazy. And usually I watch youtube at home when im not working, but i find myself skipping through the videos quiet bored, but I do this for hours. I constantly have the thoughts that im not perfect, and im easily the least fvvourite child but as I said, I find myself to have no motivation to change. I can say I have a massive dream to be a Town planner, and im heading into university in about two months time. Im somewhat social in the week, but at the same time im a little to excited in stopping my connect group I have when I start uni. Is there anything else I should include? please let me know.

prettyhurts The pressure of life
  • replies: 11

Hi all beautiful people. Im new here. Late 20s, high medication. I live with my parents. They think I work, yet im on a pension. I have to lie to them due to high expectations in our family. I am pressured to get married, ( dont have a partner or dat... View more

Hi all beautiful people. Im new here. Late 20s, high medication. I live with my parents. They think I work, yet im on a pension. I have to lie to them due to high expectations in our family. I am pressured to get married, ( dont have a partner or dating ), and I am forever feeling the extreme demand of being the best of the best. I feel like a constant failure in life. I cant work due to the drowsiness of my meds and I hate covering up that im not well enough to work. My friends are accomplished and successful, yet I struggle living up to everyones expectations. Does anyone have any advice on dealing with the pressure ? the expectations of life? xxx

Chunty Trapped and Helpless
  • replies: 22

Hi Everybody, Mood feels real low today. I feel so helpless and trapped. My internet went down and I was left almost alone all day while my carer spent most of the day trying to get it going. He was so involved with it I felt negleted. Becauseof my i... View more

Hi Everybody, Mood feels real low today. I feel so helpless and trapped. My internet went down and I was left almost alone all day while my carer spent most of the day trying to get it going. He was so involved with it I felt negleted. Becauseof my illness I am totally dependent on him. I was stuck in a recliner, in alot of pain, worse when I moved, cold , hungry and so alone escept with my darling cat Merryweather. I had to ring eventually and ask him for help.My last dose of painkillers was at 4 am and by 3 pm I was in agony. As well as coping with other issues this was the last straw.I guess I am lucky I can vent to you lovely people. Thank you.All the best. Chunty

Akiho How can I pull my own weight more?
  • replies: 4

hi. I’m a 17yr old diagnosed with anxiety two years ago and on meds for one year. For the past 8ish Months I’ve been feeling pretty down. My psychologist says depression but I can’t help feeling that it’s not. I experience all of the “telltale sympto... View more

hi. I’m a 17yr old diagnosed with anxiety two years ago and on meds for one year. For the past 8ish Months I’ve been feeling pretty down. My psychologist says depression but I can’t help feeling that it’s not. I experience all of the “telltale symptoms” but I don’t know if they’re serious enough to count? I do feel happy sometimes! My parents say that I’m making excuses to be lazy - which is fair since I’ve never been one for going to school or studying, usually I’d prefer to play games or read books instead. But now I just… don’t want to do anything? I don’t care about school anymore - or at least not to the extend that I used to - I’m behind on assignments and I’m failing a few classes. I get distracted in class (I don’t have any friends it’s just me sabotaging myself) and sometimes I struggle to see the point in trying, my goal was to be a doctor but now I can’t be bothered to even study. My dad gets really annoyed with me, I can hear him on the phone to relatives all the time complaining about “mood swings” and “rude children”, he has a whole damn prepared speech for everyone he meets. It makes me feel like such an awful person, I never want my parents to feel burdened by me but I also don’t think I’m that bad… I make an effort to help out around the house, I do the dishes, look after my siblings (3 younger), I don’t do drugs, I don’t drink (unlike my brother), hell I’ve never even held hands with a boy!! I recognise that I can be moody, it really pisses me off when my parents say things like that to me, I’m a teenager my hormones are crazy surely they don’t expect me to be as level headed as a normal adult. Whenever I feel bad they call bulls***, when I say I feel bad my dad rolls his eyes and goes “oh not this crap again”. I really want to try and be a better person but I just feel so awful when they say things like that, it just sets me back. I’d really appreciate any ideas/suggestions so I can stop being so lazy or ways to pull my weight more. I really want to be a better person so feel free to leave constructive criticism or whatever!! thanks so much

Klaura Advice
  • replies: 4

I'm currently being treated for major treatment-resistant depression, OCD, and anxiety which I've had for about 7 years. I have been on a number of medications for a while (they sometimes change based on side effects). I've been spiraling lately due ... View more

I'm currently being treated for major treatment-resistant depression, OCD, and anxiety which I've had for about 7 years. I have been on a number of medications for a while (they sometimes change based on side effects). I've been spiraling lately due to fatigue which has been getting worse for the last year to a point in which I'm not longer able to function properly. I've walked out of work crying because I'm so exhausted and can't handle finishing the day. I was having suicidal thoughts in the last months and my psychiatrist upped my medication and that has helped stop the suicidal thoughts however I don't feel any better. Therapy does not work and my psychiatrist has told me not to bother with electroconvulsive therapy or transcranial magnetic stimulation because he does not believe it will work for me. I'm waiting to start DBT however this won't occur for at least another two months. Something desperately needs to change because I am all out of hope. I'm so exhausted that it feels like I'm fighting to stand up straight, my body is weak, I find it hard to finish a sentence. I feel like my body is going to fail on me and besides polycystic ovary syndrome and sleep apnoea, there seems to be nothing else physically wrong with me. My fatigue is compounded by insomnia; Some nights I can sit up for 3-4 hours before I sleep and then I wake up constantly during the night. My diet sucks because I don't care and I can't be bothered to make anything and I can't exercise because even walking makes me feel like I'm going to collapse. I get so breathless and my muscles hurt even after a few steps (I have had an iron infusion in the last six months which didn't help). I feel like I can't function anymore and no matter what I try, nothing seems to help. Does anyone have any advice for treatment options or how to lessen the fatigue?

Glennatron 45, Always been single, don't know how to go on.
  • replies: 10

Hi there, As the title says, I am 45 (about to turn 46) and haven't been in a relationship for my entire life. I have a great job, all the possessions I could ever want, lots of money in the bank, but I can't find someone to share my life with me. I ... View more

Hi there, As the title says, I am 45 (about to turn 46) and haven't been in a relationship for my entire life. I have a great job, all the possessions I could ever want, lots of money in the bank, but I can't find someone to share my life with me. I know lots of single women but I always get friend-zoned. I used to go out every weekend with my friends (who have been in relationships for a long time now), they always had luck with women, I never did. I asked a friend to be honest with me about my looks and she said I'm a 4/10, and I believe she was actually being nice and trying to boost my feelings, she's a good person. I have tried lots of dating sites, both paid and unpaid and the only women who are interested in me I'm not physically attracted to, usually much older, call me shallow if you want but for a man to function properly you need to be physically attracted to your partner. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather date an average-looking or below average-looking woman with a nice personality than a supermodel who had bad character traits. I've talked to my friends about this and all they say is go and see a psychologist or get some anti-depressants, which are things I've done many times before. When I have had anti-depressants they have taken me from being extremely depressed to laying in a hospital bed due to suicide attempts, and I find cognitive behavioural therapy and trying to make coping strategies useless and extremely frustrating. I don't have any family so I sit at home alone all the time, I feel anxiety going to a bar on my own to meet people, my "friends" rarely invite me to social events, and I've given up trying to celebrate birthdays years ago due to only two of my core friends bothering to show up. I feel as though I tried and tried to get on top of my depression but it just gets worse. All I want is not to be lonely anymore. Whenever I do seek help from friends they just tell me to do what hasn't worked many times before, and when I seek professional help they want me to try more pills and more therapy. I'm not a genius but I'm not dim either, I can solve most issues that I come across in life and usually am able to help others with their problems also, but I've been trying to find a solution to my problems my entire adult life. I'm hoping someone might be able to give me some advice, but even if this is too hard (and I completely understand that) it's been nice to get this off my chest just typing this out.