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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Timmaye Need help, also want to help.
  • replies: 1

Hey new to this forum. Lived with one form of depression or another (depending on which doctor you ask on which day) since I was twelve. Was unfortunate enough to instill a core belief at 15 that there were many more cons than pro's to living and I s... View more

Hey new to this forum. Lived with one form of depression or another (depending on which doctor you ask on which day) since I was twelve. Was unfortunate enough to instill a core belief at 15 that there were many more cons than pro's to living and I should kill myself. I still can't shake that and battle it daily. I'm 32 now and have many coping strategies and alerts for how to fight the dark, that has kept me safe and for the most part sane-ish. I would like to help if I can. My most beneficial times in my life were not in a classroom but learning true torment and horror in places like a locked ward. I was blessed to visit such a place for a few weeks after a very close suicide attempt. Seeing how the mind can be turned into a true torture device humbled me as my condition's worst case was simply death, fairly mild in comparison to some people I met and befriended. I spent my time helping those around me in a way the staff could never have. I have survived some very bad times in my life and would like to find out if there is something I can do from what I've learnt that can help people feeling truly hopeless. Though I often leave not hope for myself, I challenge anyone to sit and have a conversation about the black hopeless despair with me and not feel at least a little more light at the end.

Bennyone Feeling lower than ever at the moment
  • replies: 1

To whoever is reading, I’m a 24 Yr old male, pretty big history of mental illness and had ongoing issues with depression and anxiety. I am feeling lower than ever at the moment after coming out of a long term relationship. I feel super alone at the m... View more

To whoever is reading, I’m a 24 Yr old male, pretty big history of mental illness and had ongoing issues with depression and anxiety. I am feeling lower than ever at the moment after coming out of a long term relationship. I feel super alone at the moment as now I am coming home to an empty apartment every day and being surrounded by my own thoughts. I have friends but they don’t really understand and even if they do, I shut everyone out because I hate talking about what’s going on in my head. This is the first time I’ve ever posted on a forum or done this because I feel so hopeless. Just constantly breaking down in tears and feeling like there’s no point anymore doing this day in and day out. I’ve seen doctors and been medicated for Major Depressive Disorder and anxiety for the past 10 years, and just don’t have the motivation anymore to go talk to someone or see doctors again. Come from a broken home and only really have a relationship with my mum but she is going through a lot and as I said I just, I can’t even explain it, it’s like I know how toxic this is to deal with this on my own and not talk about it or do anything but I can’t bring myself to open up to anyone anymore and get help. In my relationships I’ve had partners be very upset because they think that one day they would lose me because of my mental illness, and that breaks my heart, but at the same time I also feel like I don’t see any other future for myself except to do this day by day until one day I can’t take it anymore. I don’t know how to help myself when it’s like I don’t want to be helped anymore??

Hiraeth24 just wanting to sleep all day and night - no spark or joy from anything
  • replies: 2

Hi all, just seeking some comfort/advice i think. i have a psych, im on medication, i know the things i want to do. I'm not afraid to be alone but seem to seek validation of love from relationships because ive come to realise the trauma's and experie... View more

Hi all, just seeking some comfort/advice i think. i have a psych, im on medication, i know the things i want to do. I'm not afraid to be alone but seem to seek validation of love from relationships because ive come to realise the trauma's and experiences over the past few years have left me without an ounce of self-worth or self-esteem. i've just had a recent breakup from someone who was always hot/cold and on/off for a few months, but now im wondering was it because i didn't love myself and came across too needy that this is why the relationship ended. i don't get any enjoyment or spark from anything anymore. All my family is in victoria and i am in brisbane and with COVID - as well as my mum who is my closest person i want to speak to (getting too upset and stressed in my times of need because of her own trauma as well as being super healthy and now having to retire after multiple strokes. i feel exhausted, i feel empty. it feels like the road ahead is just unatainable. i have been filling voids with unescessary spending which just makes things worse as i have a large outstanding debt from exes and paying for everything that's going nowhere despite having a good job. most recently, i felt so low that i just wanted to not wake up. i hadn't been able to go to work for 3 nights and couldn't move from bed or eat anything. i suffer from anxiety too and i just feel like im constantly running a race with all this adrenaline built up. i feel like i've always been the stepping stone for past relationships- the empath who loves them wholeheartedly despite any flaws and then they up and leave and find their forever. that's hard. as that's something i've always wanted and i feel i deserve. is it just i'm not attracting the right people because i have so much work to do? i feel lost, i feel alone, and i feel frustrated.

John_E_S Recovering from depression
  • replies: 9

Hi all, I hope you all are doing well. I have been actively trying to improve my outlook on life lately. It is really hard but I feel I am very slowly improving. The part I am finding the most challenging are the peaks and dips. I have periods where ... View more

Hi all, I hope you all are doing well. I have been actively trying to improve my outlook on life lately. It is really hard but I feel I am very slowly improving. The part I am finding the most challenging are the peaks and dips. I have periods where I feel ok, even happy, but they are split by periods where I feel horrible and can only see catastrophe. These bad periods seem to be more common in the morning I have people I talk to but I feel I have been leaning heavily on them and really just usy re hashing the same comments again and again. Does anyone have anything that has been successful for them in getting through these troughs...

Sarlia Struggling a Bit
  • replies: 5

So this is my first time posting anything like this, and I’ve been putting it off for a while because it just felt wrong but here goes. I don’t even know if this comes under this thread honestly. I am a 24 year old female. I had a bit of a difficult ... View more

So this is my first time posting anything like this, and I’ve been putting it off for a while because it just felt wrong but here goes. I don’t even know if this comes under this thread honestly. I am a 24 year old female. I had a bit of a difficult life late primary school and most of high school, nothing too bad but a lot of issues in regards to fitting in, being bullied, anxiety in going to school, panic attacks, self harm and attempted suicide. I honestly put my mum and sister through hell with the amount of worry I gave them. I just couldn’t help it. I tried therapy with two ladies, both made me uncomfortable so I’ve avoided trying again since then. I just don’t know what to do. I’m struggling to cope with anything and everything. I feel like crying all the time, I don’t have motivation to do anything, I constantly feel like a failure that isn’t improving. I work at Woolworths for a measly 3-9 hour week, and I’m currently studying veterinary nursing, which is overdue due to my cowardly self not being able to have enough courage to record the videos required of me. I’ve been stuck on my Ls for 3 years now because I’m scared of failing, which is also holding me back. I don’t really know what it is but, I have a really bad feeling, sort of anxiety I guess, in regards to being in a place I can’t escape. Planes, buses, coaches, boats, roller coasters, sometimes work, sometimes the shops. I just think, think, think of all of the potential negatives that might happen and it makes my heart race, makes me feel dizzy, makes me scared, nauseous, stomach cramps, the constant feeling of panic. Sometimes the only way to zone out of it is to just lean back and try to zone out of any thought and cool down but they only works a good 5% of the time. This feeling has made me vomit a few times and usually always gives me diarrhoea. This also makes me worry on the future, what if I get pregnant and have an attack like this? Will it kill the child? Will I ever feel normal? How do I learn to not freak out? I feel like I’m stuck on a forever loop of feeling useless, helpless, scared, stressed.. I don’t even know where to start. If anyone has any ideas, I’d greatly appreciate it. Or at least tell me they feel the same or have at some point. I just feel so alone I’m how I feel and I’m just.. scared.

displayname8 A personal win?
  • replies: 3

Today I bought tickets for the Dog Lovers Show... which is significant because I hate wasting money - and therefore I have to continue existing until at least until the 8th of August so that my tickets don't go to waste. I'm going with my mum, who is... View more

Today I bought tickets for the Dog Lovers Show... which is significant because I hate wasting money - and therefore I have to continue existing until at least until the 8th of August so that my tickets don't go to waste. I'm going with my mum, who is not the biggest fan of dogs, but I didn't want to go alone. I'm thankful that she's agreed to come along with me. I don't know if this will stimulate discussion or anything but I just wanted to share it somewhere anonymously without anyone I know in real life being able to judge me for it. I've been afraid to even think about anything beyond my organ donation day (becoming an organ donor) - so it seemed so silly to book anything beyond it.. but now that the tickets are booked, that's somewhat of a personal win, right? I wonder whether it's the right choice... I suddenly feel alot heavier with the burden of having to continue to exist - things just seemed so much lighter when I could the see the end of the tunnel.

spaceyogurt Struggling to fit in and depression.
  • replies: 10

I arrived to Australia last year and I still am unable to fit in here. Being an introverted person, I did not join most university activities as most of it is partying and drinking, which I do not like. Due to this I have spent most of my time in my ... View more

I arrived to Australia last year and I still am unable to fit in here. Being an introverted person, I did not join most university activities as most of it is partying and drinking, which I do not like. Due to this I have spent most of my time in my room for the past 2 years and it has made me depressed and very anxious. I do not have any close friends here or back at home, so I have nobody to talk to. Since childhood I have always had really low self esteem due to my looks. (My friends and family used to make fun of me due to being overweight). But I am not that fat either (90kg) but because of the past bullying, I have really bad social anxiety which prevents me from meeting new people. Im always scared of being made fun of when Im in public. I started doing better habits few months ago, quit smoking, started working out and eating healthy. But i feel like my mood is getting worse day by day and Im struggling to concentrate on my studies now. Ive lost interest in my hobbies too. Everyday I think of making an appointment with a GP to get help, but I end up not doing it due to my negative self talk. I feel like a fraud and that my symptoms are not that serious and feel like doctors are gonna judge me or sth. I dont know what will motivate me to get help, it just feels like a huge effort to call the clinic and ask for an appointment.

Cee123 Having nothing in life
  • replies: 86

Hi guys, I just need someone to talk to about how crappy I feel. I have a massive sense of failure in my life and I feel completely stuck, I have ongoing loneliness, years of unemployment, no friends, no partner, I'm 35 soon and I should be married w... View more

Hi guys, I just need someone to talk to about how crappy I feel. I have a massive sense of failure in my life and I feel completely stuck, I have ongoing loneliness, years of unemployment, no friends, no partner, I'm 35 soon and I should be married with kids but I have nothing and I feel like time is running out. I live at home with my parents still. They are my only real source of support. I don't have anybody else. And if I lived alone I would've lost it by now and probably taken my own life. I have depression, social anxiety... I've always been single all my life and I can't find anybody. I haven't worked in over 10 years because at my last job which was a deadend job in housekeeping I was bullied and called a retard and this caused ongoing mental health issues. Just a couple of years ago, I started going to the gym with my cousin. I'm currently still going to the gym and this has lifted my spirits a bit. It took me a long, long time before I could even go into a gym. But now I'm running out of money, and I feel like I won't be able to afford it anymore. I don't know what to do for money. I am painfully shy and awkward to even talk to people much of the time. I have been applying for jobs online and heard absolutely nothing back. I have seriously low self-esteem. I just feel sad. I have a dog who's 16 years old now who I can't even take for walks anymore because she's on her last legs. She's like my child. I've been to therapists about my depression and they haven't helped. I've also been on medication which has helped a little bit. I went off it for about a year because I didn't like the side effects. Now I feel like I'm going to need it again. I don't know what to do with my life. I feel depressed and lonely all the time, no one talks to me anymore, I don't go anywhere because I have nowhere to go. Even at the gym it feels like I have no association with anyone. I'm posting here, I hope I won't get judged or abused because I've abused on forums before and it's been horrible.

grace_overflowing Finding Myself
  • replies: 3

Recently, I have been feeling worthless and can’t be bothered to do basic things. I never feel like eating and my main hobby barely interests me anymore. People get angry at me for being myself and I honestly don’t understand. I never used to show my... View more

Recently, I have been feeling worthless and can’t be bothered to do basic things. I never feel like eating and my main hobby barely interests me anymore. People get angry at me for being myself and I honestly don’t understand. I never used to show my emotions and i bottled them up inside, but now that I have people think I’m overreacting and wanting all the attention. Truthfully, I’m only trying to be myself. I need help. How can I become the friend that everyone used to know? I’ve changed so much, and everyone notices. I think I just need to figure out who I am and take time to improve myself, so that I can be a better friend to others. Any advice?

Cmay Out of my depth with depressed spouse
  • replies: 2

I’ve always suffered from bouts of depression but have been good at maintaining it throughout my life until now. My husband of 4 years suffers undiagnosed chronic depression. For the past 2 years he has felt hopeless, immense sadness, sleeps all the ... View more

I’ve always suffered from bouts of depression but have been good at maintaining it throughout my life until now. My husband of 4 years suffers undiagnosed chronic depression. For the past 2 years he has felt hopeless, immense sadness, sleeps all the time, can’t hold a job despite being qualified in a sought after industry, lost communication with all of his friends , isolated and began hoarding. I tried for a long time to get him to seek help but he refuses to even talk to anyone. It got to the point that he began becoming aggressive and had multiple infidelities. Instead of lifting him out of his depression I began spiralling into it. I couldn’t cope any longer and made the decision in September of 2020 to move home for awhile where I’ve began to make real progress within myself. I’m only 28 and didn’t want to look back one day and feel regret because I didn’t accomplish any of the hopes and dreams I have. I still feel love and a real attachment to my husband and we communicate on a daily basis, however he desperately wants me back living in Victoria with him. During the time I’ve been gone he has been kicked out of the house and lives in his car. I’ve tried to explain that I need to stay where I am right now and try to talk to him but the sadness he expresses down the phone to me is pulling me right back into my depressed state. He sobs uncontrollably and says he doesn’t know what to do and no one will be able to help, he talks about suicide and often tells me he’s going to do it on this day/night and has no self esteem. He expresses debilitating loneliness and believes he’s too old to make a fresh start (he’s only 40 this year). I don’t know what to do, I almost feel responsible for him and there’s nothing I can do to help him. When I try he gets angry at me and I’ve resorted to having to tell him he can’t share these emotions with me. I honestly feel like I’m going to have a mental breakdown. I’m way out of my depth. does anyone have any suggestions on how to help?