Young people

Does it get better? I feel broken

replies: 3

Hi, for what seems like forever, I have felt nothing but sadness. I sought help at the start of the year and after a couple of bad experiences, have found a doctor who cares. I haven't been diagnosed properly and so I feel like I'm in limbo. I feel s... View more

Hi, for what seems like forever, I have felt nothing but sadness. I sought help at the start of the year and after a couple of bad experiences, have found a doctor who cares. I haven't been diagnosed properly and so I feel like I'm in limbo. I feel so stuck. The doctors that I've been to have agreed with my counselor's diagnosis of Dysthymia but all I've been doing is crisis management with my school counselor rather than taking steps to recovery. My biggest concern is that I am scared I will feel like this forever. I feel like depression has irrevocably altered my life. Will things ever be 'normal' again? Cause I have no idea what that may even look like. Is medication worth a shot? I'm legally still a child so my doctor is hesitant, and my condition isn't that 'severe'.

Hello, I am Steve

replies: 2

Hey everyone, My name's Steve, I'm new to the Beyond Blue forum haha. Allow me to introduce myself.. Like many, I too suffer from depression and anxiety. My time in primary and secondary schooling, was well.. The polar opposite of positive. Most of m... View more

Hey everyone, My name's Steve, I'm new to the Beyond Blue forum haha. Allow me to introduce myself.. Like many, I too suffer from depression and anxiety. My time in primary and secondary schooling, was well.. The polar opposite of positive. Most of my time in school was shrouded in misery, depression, unrelenting bullying and the list goes on. Despite my best efforts, I've been really struggling to deal with depression (due to unemployment) recently. In order to try and deter depression, I regularly hit the gym (3 times a week) for lengthy sessions at a time. While regularly attending gym is a good thing, it still does not fix the underlining problem of unemployment. After working out rigorously, I often find myself with too much time on my hands. I do enjoy maintaining a very clean car, but you can't be washing it daily lol. I do enjoy hitting the beach, but given that it is winter here in Melbourne, the cold ocean breeze does detract from the overall enjoyment of the beach haha. So why don't I go get a job?.. Ahh yes, easier said than done. When your someone like me, who gets discriminated from applying for jobs due to your heritage (despite having the essential licence), it makes applying for and being accepted for a job.. Impossible. I myself am not one to judge people, I am very accepting of all people, all shapes/sizes, heritage, religion etc. I never judge people on those particular things, but it seems that others judge me purely on my heritage. Maybe employers are scared that a young man with dark brown hair & eyes and olive/tanned skin wants to become a truck driver?, the possibilities are endless. If you must know, I am of Italian heritage. I can't understand why being of that heritage is disliked by employers, it's just ridiculous. I've found that by paying attention, listening and offering advice and tips to many other people in our community, it helps me too. I understand that there are many people who are suffering from depression for different reasons compared to me, It's something that i want to help people with. Having suffered from depression for many years, I'm definitely no stranger to it. I can well and truly relate to it and understand what many are going through. That's why I want to help people, to let them know their experiences are understandable. That's my brief introduction (not really brief, but you know what I mean), I look forward to speaking to and offering advice to many on this forum. Thank you for reading my thread!

Not being able to moving forward

replies: 6

Hi all, I've never written anything like this online before so here it goes.. I guess I feel as though I'm not getting anywhere in life, I lost my best friend very unexpectedly 2 years ago which of course left me devastated. But because of family iss... View more

Hi all, I've never written anything like this online before so here it goes.. I guess I feel as though I'm not getting anywhere in life, I lost my best friend very unexpectedly 2 years ago which of course left me devastated. But because of family issues (world war 3 every night between parents) I was not able to grieve properly. Since then I have moved house a few times but had been constantly worried about my younger siblings who were still home so I had to step in and remove them from there, so they now live with me. This caused more issues between our parents. The few friends I do still have don't like to talk to me all that much and they have admitted to me that my depression is something think is too much effort and would rather be around someone who is happy all of the time. That hurts me. I have listened to them but having people you love tell you that you are too much effort is really a kick in the guts. I just seem to be stuck in the rut and cannot find a way to climb out.

Do I have depression?

replies: 3

Hi. I've just come across Beyond Blue, as for the past five/six weeks I've been feeling like I've been having these continuous phases of sadness and despair. Sometimes I can feel extremely alone and hopeless and I just break down. It hits me at rando... View more

Hi. I've just come across Beyond Blue, as for the past five/six weeks I've been feeling like I've been having these continuous phases of sadness and despair. Sometimes I can feel extremely alone and hopeless and I just break down. It hits me at random times but there hasn't been a day so far that has been 100% free of that feeling. At first I thought that it was just sadness, but it seems different, like, I've never felt this way before. I started to look at some of the symptoms on this website and some explain exactly how I'm feeling - overwhelmed, irritable, miserable, hopeless and withdrawing from people and things that I used to love doing. I took the checklist test that the website provides and it came out with moderate depression...but I feel like I can't actually ask anyone if this could be happening to me, as I feel like they'd just think I was being dramatic. I'm not quite sure where to go from here or whether or not depression explains my thoughts and feelings lately, but any advice would be much appreciated.

What am I doing with my life?

replies: 4

In high school, I started developing social anxiety to extreme extent. Other kids would make fun of me all the time. People would even hit me. When teacher asks me questions, I would just sit quiet as everyone stares at me. I couldn't even say hi to ... View more

In high school, I started developing social anxiety to extreme extent. Other kids would make fun of me all the time. People would even hit me. When teacher asks me questions, I would just sit quiet as everyone stares at me. I couldn't even say hi to anyone. You know in movies. there's at least someone who is there for you, but I was all alone. I was that kid who sat alone in corners, that kid who everyone makes fun of, that kid who had no one to support, that kid who always works alone, that kid who has no Facebook, twitter and other social networks because I had no one to add, that someone who only has family in phone contact. Seemed I'm the only one like this in this world Teacher and my parents would worry but nothing could be done. With high school over now, I did make it for Uni. I thought I could reset my life but still I carried that social anxiety from 5 years ago. I couldn't say hi to students and lecturers, couldn't even speak a counsellor. No one would want to partner with me, even if I was placed in a group, I'd get ignored. This Uni life is so bland that I started skipping classes. Now I'm failing almost every subject. All I have in this life is my parents. I couldn't tell them. I don't want to worry them. What do I do? Can't even talk in job interviews or a counsellor or anyone. What am I doing with my life? Why am I even writing these? Who am I? I don't even know. All I want is to be normal like others. I would let myself go than to live like this for the rest of my life. They say there's good and bad in life but I've been having bad life since I was born. What do I hope to get by writing these? Sympathy? Hope? Maybe someone? I don't know how to escape this hell. Let myself go? I'm too scared. I can't seek help. Would help seek me? or drown me in loneliness?beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Do I have depression?

replies: 4

I'm unsure of my state of mind. There're some symptoms of depression which I know I definitely have, but not others. I have no motivation to do anything, and its having a negative impact on my study and work. I find it very difficult to concentrate o... View more

I'm unsure of my state of mind. There're some symptoms of depression which I know I definitely have, but not others. I have no motivation to do anything, and its having a negative impact on my study and work. I find it very difficult to concentrate on what I need to do (sometimes I can't even concentrate at all). I don't often go out, but I get the feeling its more do do with a lack of invitation. That is, if one of my friends invited me, I would probably go, if only to avoid turning them down. I also don't reach out to any of my friends. I'm not excited or passionate about anything. I used to enjoy reading, but I haven't read a book in about 2 years, and feel very little interest in picking it back up. I spend most of my time procrastinating. And there are times (usually when my mother questions me about university) where I get extremely frustrated and become very biting in what I say and how I act; occasionally I am so overwhelmed I start crying, because I am so insecure about my future, and don't know what to do. I am never happy with anything I do, I have very little confidence, and am EXTREMELY indecisive (big problem for me). I also constantly compare myself to others, usually those I perceive to be doing better than me with uni/life. Sometimes, my thoughts drift into darker territory, but only occasionally. Lastly, I am always feeling tired, and I have trouble getting to sleep (probably to do with me staying on my phone during the night). On the other hand though, I often smile to other people, and if someone initiates a conversation with me, I generally have no problem carrying it on. With people I am close to, I can be very animated in how I talk/act. However, with strangers, if they seem talkative, I tend to be. If they seem like they don't want to talk, then even if I want to initiate a conversation and make friends I find it impossible. Most of what I do in my interpersonal interaction is done because I am scared of being judged. I don't drink or use drugs. Although I said I'm always tired, there are very occasional times when I feel an intense urge to get up and run (no sugar, just a sudden impulse). I have read that while people suffering from depression display the symptoms in the first paragraph, the things I describe in the second paragraph go against what depressed people are known to do. So I'm confused as to whether I actually have depression. Any advice regarding anything mentioned in the post is welcome and appreciated.

Seeking much needed advice!

replies: 3

Hi all, I am starting my 1 afternoon a week shift back at the vet clinic this Wednesday! I am feeling okay about it but as it gets closer I can feel some of those anxiety habits coming back. A friend of mine who also works there 1 afternoon a week an... View more

Hi all, I am starting my 1 afternoon a week shift back at the vet clinic this Wednesday! I am feeling okay about it but as it gets closer I can feel some of those anxiety habits coming back. A friend of mine who also works there 1 afternoon a week and with me at a fruit and vegetable market has helped me to write a list of jobs to do, so if I get stuck I can just pull out the list for some guidance. If anyone has any other tips to help get me through I would really appreciate hearing them! Thanks heaps, Kelly

Can't move anymore, can't breathe.

replies: 3

I've lived with depression all my life. I've managed to keep it under control all my life, but everything is falling apart, & has been for a while. I'm 23, have no job, spend all day, everyday by myself, in bed, watching TV. My friends don't have tim... View more

I've lived with depression all my life. I've managed to keep it under control all my life, but everything is falling apart, & has been for a while. I'm 23, have no job, spend all day, everyday by myself, in bed, watching TV. My friends don't have time for me in their lives & I haven't got anyone who cares enough to notice or listen. The past week I've been drowning & I can't do it for much longer. I can't seem to get myself out of the house. I've always thought I could keep this under control, but I can't. My mind is going crazy, & I feel like I can't move, but my blood is rushing. I know I need to get help, but my brain isn't letting me make myself better. I feel like I don't deserve to be a valid member of society, that I'm too useless & pathetic, someone regular people look down on. No one wants to be around me because my personality can be very over bearing, so I'm devoid of human contact all day. My mother doesn't pay much attention to me being there, so I'm on my phone a lot. But the past week I'm not even able to pick up a book & read it. I'm just sitting or laying there, freaking out at my problems & life, not wanting to be here, feeling anxiety. beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Its a cycle...

replies: 2

Hi everyone! Lately I haven't been too well. My best friend has anxiety and depression, but it runs in my family too. This year is stressful for me so I've been experiencing panic attacks and with a lot going on, I've also been feeling very depressed... View more

Hi everyone! Lately I haven't been too well. My best friend has anxiety and depression, but it runs in my family too. This year is stressful for me so I've been experiencing panic attacks and with a lot going on, I've also been feeling very depressed. It's on and off though but sometimes it lasts long periods (if that makes sense...) and there are many factors that trigger it back. I feel like I'm very emotionally unstable because of this so one bad thing happens and my world crashes down and I remember all the other stuff and I feel awful. I isolate myself from my friends. I don't tell anyone anything because I feel like my other friends won't understand and will just brush it off, but some times I just really need some support. Some nights I just cry!!! My best friend suffering from mental illness also, I tried to talk to her about the panic attacks I've been having, and she kind of just hovered and didn't say anything and acted awkward. I'd like to be able to open up to someone because I just really need some support but I feel I don't trust my friends well enough and my mum wants me to focus on other things but I haven't told her the half of it so she doesn't understand that my mental wellbeing is a flow-on effect to these other things like school.... My best friend because she has anxiety too, but worse than me, lacks in confidence and its quite triggering for me. All our outings have to involved getting all dressed up with heaps of makeup and always getting new outfits. This isn't really teaching me to be confident in myself and it actually makes me feel very self conscious and down in the dumps :(. I know it might sound silly but it's actually something I've been struggling with for a long time because I have 0 confidence and low self esteem. This is a really negative influence in my life but I don't know what to do. Should I tell her i'd like to take some time to think because I have some things going on, and maybe keep my distance? It doesn't make me feel good about myself at all and makes me feel worthless. I wish I had some friends I could talk to about this. I hope you guys understand! some days I just want to take a week off school and just refresh because mental health has a flow on effect to other things so never postpone renewing your mental health (as some people are trying to tell me to do). I just need to escape! I hope you have a lovely day everyone. Sending hugs xoxoxo

No Motivation and Feeling Emotionally Numb

replies: 1

I have never sought help before - I'm a 23 year old who has always pushed through my limitations. I know I have anxiety/stress - I do have anxiety attacks where I can't breath. I always push through, because in my family there is no room for this kin... View more

I have never sought help before - I'm a 23 year old who has always pushed through my limitations. I know I have anxiety/stress - I do have anxiety attacks where I can't breath. I always push through, because in my family there is no room for this kind of feeling. But my normal high stress overdrive I have been living in constantly for at least four years has transformed into something I can't cope with. Feeling absolutely and utterly numb. Nothing charges my emotions - I am a void of dark bitterness, and its affect me terribly (my friends or lack of friends, my relationship, my humour, my drive/will power, my dedication to succeed & my uni).I think the transformation was triggered recently - I'm doing a masters in environmental management but I see no point to it anymore, a lot of this has to do with my on-off job lifestyle for the last four years. It has contained me from even considering my money as something to promote fun - I haven't had a 'holiday' in 7 years, I don't buy anything unless absolutely necessary because the money is expenses and safety net. I'm starting a new job and I feel nothing towards it - no excitement, not even anxiety just a 'meh' feeling. I have no charge for my field (environmental) because it is impossible to find a job that just feels like it fits me. My last job burnt me out, put stress on my relationship and left me a deflated husk on a chair for a week. I have no motivation to care about this new job or my life - I'm not even sure where I want to be in my life anymore. I just feel empty.I used to love painting, acting (drama), and absolutely adore writing. My partner is making me write a novel to keep me up beat because its the only thing that I feel any emotion towards. But because of my masters I lack time to pursue these activities. I know I am a motivated, in charge type of person - but my life seems so very dull, empty and not worthwhile I do wonder if simply locking the door and never going out again is a possibility. I'm trying to ignore it and convince myself this is how life is...but I don't want it to feel this way anymore. Is my career/job life always going to feel so limited, am I always going to feel numb like my emotional insides are repressed in a jar? How do I kick some motivation back in?beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Pinned discussions

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

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All discussions

Does it get better? I feel broken

replies: 3

Hello, I am Steve

replies: 2

Not being able to moving forward

replies: 6

Do I have depression?

replies: 3

What am I doing with my life?

replies: 4

Do I have depression?

replies: 4

Seeking much needed advice!

replies: 3

Can't move anymore, can't breathe.

replies: 3

Its a cycle...

replies: 2

No Motivation and Feeling Emotionally Numb

replies: 1

Young people

New to this Forum? Please read this first! replies: 0

Does it get better? I feel broken replies: 3

Hello, I am Steve replies: 2

Not being able to moving forward replies: 6

Do I have depression? replies: 3

What am I doing with my life? replies: 4

Do I have depression? replies: 4

Seeking much needed advice! replies: 3

Can't move anymore, can't breathe. replies: 3

Its a cycle... replies: 2

No Motivation and Feeling Emotionally Numb replies: 1

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

Does it get better? I feel broken

replies: 3

Hello, I am Steve

replies: 2

Not being able to moving forward

replies: 6

Do I have depression?

replies: 3

What am I doing with my life?

replies: 4

Do I have depression?

replies: 4

Seeking much needed advice!

replies: 3

Can't move anymore, can't breathe.

replies: 3

Its a cycle...

replies: 2

No Motivation and Feeling Emotionally Numb

replies: 1