Young people

Stressful job / what to do / trying to conceive / lost and depressed.

replies: 4

Hi all. I'm a 21 year old female trying to find my place in the world. I'm wanting to hear from anyone with suggestions. Basically i hate my job, to the point where it's severely impacting my whole life. i'm always miserable.. I'm always thinking abo... View more

Hi all. I'm a 21 year old female trying to find my place in the world. I'm wanting to hear from anyone with suggestions. Basically i hate my job, to the point where it's severely impacting my whole life. i'm always miserable.. I'm always thinking about my job when im at home and i cant stop. i'm always looking for a new job but because i've had 7 jobs in 4 years im being a bit cautious because i dont want to keep swapping jobs all the time. My current role is in finance/insurance in a car dealership, and to date it's the worst move i've made. Only reason i took the job is because my other role at coles was low hours and i was struggling financially. now i work 46 hours a week, have a high expectation to sell everyone finance/insurance which i cant do because i dont like pushing or objection handling. my results are poor and i'm at breaking point. I would love to just quit but financially it's not a great move for my partner and me. We have no debts and for 4 months we have been trying to concieve a baby. which makes it hard for me. Not only do i hate my job, i feel like i'm failing at trying to become a mother. I know i really need to try to be in a good financial position for a child but at the moment i couldnt care if i lose my job tomorrow. i cry all the time and i cant stand being at work. Bare in mind, i currently live in a small town country mining town that is currently going through a huge downturn and jobs are getting made redundant every day. I want to really be able to show my partner i can be stable and finanially not have to rely on him. I've been applying at jobs i think may suit me and that i'll be able to stay long term but i haven't heard anything back and im at breaking point with my job! What would you do? HELP!

Problems with a girl. Feeling lonely and down

replies: 4

Hey guys, apologies in advanced if I bore all of you. It's just lately I've been feeling extremely down and depressed. I know it sounds really stupid, but there's this girl I've liked for nearly a year now, and when i fall for someone, i fall hard. I... View more

Hey guys, apologies in advanced if I bore all of you. It's just lately I've been feeling extremely down and depressed. I know it sounds really stupid, but there's this girl I've liked for nearly a year now, and when i fall for someone, i fall hard. I'm 17 btw. For a couple of months now we've talked non-stop, both texting and snapchatting. Im known around my school as 'one of the nicest guys', as apparently 'i don't have a mean bone in my body', but i think it's more to do with the fact that I have a very strong sense of morals and hate seeing people hurt or upset, so rather resort to being genuinely nice and attempt to make friends with everyone regardless. Anyway, after months of talking non-stop, we've only seen eachother twice out of school, one time of which was to go to her free house one evening. I'm quite inexperienced with women (haven't even had my first kiss), and have always had trouble talking to girls in person, sometimes even blushing. It's only recently that this has gone away and my confidence has built up, yet not to the stage where I can muster the courage to make a move. Anyway, nothing happened that night, we really just sat & talked & laughed through a whole movie. Given we still talked heaps, I have always wanted to see her more on the weekends, yet have always been hesitant because she always seems busy and I don't wanna come off as annoying. I eventually asked her to coffee but she said she couldn't at the time due to prior commitments. Even though it was disappointing, in a way it was also a kind of win as it showed i was interested in her. Yet, on Wednesday everything changed. She stopped talking on fb, and has stopped replying on snapchat. It's gotten to the stage where I'm starting to give up. I've just invested so much time into her that i would expect something to come of it. Now i just wanna give up. As cliche as it is, she's the first thing i think of when i wake up, and last thing when I fall asleep; I think of her non-stop. It's at the stage that for the past few nights i've been crying myself to sleep cause i'm just so cut up about it. And during the day, even the smallest things can reduce me to tears. I honestly don't understand what i've done to deserve this. Anyway, she drives me crazy, and I just feel so empty now. And i wish i could stop, but i can't. Part of me hopes this is just temporary, but I'm not entirely convinced. I just wish she would give me a chance and understand how much i care for her.

Struggling to cope with expectations, constant pressure and anxiety

replies: 1

Hi everyone, I'm James, I'm 17, and I have something that I feel I need to talk about. Lately I have been struggling with constant anxiety. I've always been a fairly anxious person by nature but I'm feeling worse than I ever have before. I've taken o... View more

Hi everyone, I'm James, I'm 17, and I have something that I feel I need to talk about. Lately I have been struggling with constant anxiety. I've always been a fairly anxious person by nature but I'm feeling worse than I ever have before. I've taken on a very heavy workload with the subjects I've chosen this year, and I reached a point at which it became too much. I began to stress, I stopped handing in assignments. I've always been a very high achiever, as well as being quite independent with my studies, so when I don't know the answer to something I feel embarrassed. I've found a lot of work challenging this year. I felt more comfortable not handing in any work than handing in work that, in my opinion, was embarrassing. The anxiety coming from this has affected me greatly. I often have sudden depressive mood swings, I find it hard to be around people, even those close to me. I feel a constant pressure to act as though I'm okay. When I'm with my friends I don't feel as though I can leave to spend some time alone to calm myself down. I have a very small friendship group and I feel like I constantly have to be around them. They are great people, but sometimes I need space to myself and I don't feel like I can have that. I worry a lot about what they think of me. With my parents recently receiving my latest report, they now know that I have been missing assignments and not handing up work. Naturally, I'm now under a lot of pressure to catch up. I feel like they're constantly watching me. I know that my parents care about me, but I can't help feeling like a complete disappointment to them, especially when compared to my 3 older brothers. I'm constantly under pressure now and I still feel like it's all too much. I've told a couple of close friends about how I'm feeling, but I can't bring myself to tell my parents. I've never really talked to them about anything emotional, and even though I feel like an absolute mess, I really don't want them to feel as though there is something wrong with me. I'm really scared about what could happen soon if I don't do something. I feel like I'm constantly on the verge of breaking down into uncontrollable crying. I'm afraid of what people will think of me if they know what I'm dealing with. I'm scared of the responsibilities that the next stage in my life will bring. I just want to disappear for a while, so no one can see me and I don't have any pressure to act as though I'm fine. I need help. Thanks for reading.

Could this year get any worse.....?

replies: 2

Hey all, I'm Charlotte and this year has been the toughest year of my life. I through growing up would be the best all I could ever want I'm 16 for heavens sakes. Every since I started high school I've been studying Italian and I really enjoyed it so... View more

Hey all, I'm Charlotte and this year has been the toughest year of my life. I through growing up would be the best all I could ever want I'm 16 for heavens sakes. Every since I started high school I've been studying Italian and I really enjoyed it so much that in year 8 I went to Italy with my school. And I enjoyed it so much that my parents gave me a once in a life time opportunity to go on exchange, and that I did for 5 months last year. I had a very hard time leaving to go the trip of a life time but it did it I made it on the plane and left my whole life behind to start a new chapter as they say. I had the best but worst time over there because I found out what my breaking point is and I went past it. I still try and convince myself that my parents didn't just waste a lot of money on me having the worst time ever. But I do have to say it had it ups too but they didn't last long unless I just put on a smile to try and hide how nervous I was. I hit rock bottom and I guess I'm just having trouble getting back to the top. I mean I have most things that other don't so why complain that's how I see it but I know deep down I'm drowning. On the way home I was excited but overwhelmed with what had happened and what I have just done which was amazing because it was a great experience. But when I came home with a new start it wasn't all that. It was the start of a new year a fresh year for me at school and everything I thought I could get go back to school with all my friends and everything would be amazing like I never left. But it wasn't at all, friends who were they, could I even trust anyone anymore, they didn't really care and they still don't. I know that I wasn't popular to begin with and that still didn't matter to me but the fact was I felt alone, at school I can stand all by myself in the middle of nowhere and not one of my 'friends' would look at me or walk over to me I was just forgotten. I still don't know where I fit in anymore. It was all fine and I just keeping going and I found some other people who I now call friends but like i'm still the odd one out. Don't even get me started on guys, I can't trust any of the good looking ones just the ones who are my friends but that's all I need I guess. This year has been hard there is a lot more I could tell you from the depression and anxiety and how it all leads to 'italy'. If you could be bothered to read this please help me I could use someone to talk to. Thanks, Scar.

In constant pain and fear

replies: 3

I am going through a really difficult time at the moment because of financial pressures and the pressure and negative remarks from family members has done quiet a number on my health am I am really concerned that I am loosing weight rapidly was 110kg... View more

I am going through a really difficult time at the moment because of financial pressures and the pressure and negative remarks from family members has done quiet a number on my health am I am really concerned that I am loosing weight rapidly was 110kgs now somewhere between 80-90kgs I haven't been able to eat properly for sometime and to make the weight loss worse is the waking up every morning sometimes as early as 4:30-5 am just to be sick and I feel cold all the time I have to wear so many layers I feel rediculous . Everytime I talk on the phone to my mum and start discussing with her what she suggest would help but I wand up a ready mess before my mum can give advice I hang up as I am ashamed that I have helped soo many people in the past but I cannot help myself. I have many emotional and traumatic experiences that I am still struggling to come to grasps with. As a 23 year old male I have seen things and witnessed events that keep playing out through my mind everyday and finding it is getting harder by the day I was just wondering if anyone can help me understand what's happening why I'm so cold all the time. Why does everything have to stuff up for me all the time help beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Anxious about Relationship

replies: 3

I started having panic attacks a week ago, I wasn't sure what was happening as I have never dealt with anxiety like that before. I thought I was going insane, like I was in a bad trip. This happened 3 weeks after moving in with my partner into our ow... View more

I started having panic attacks a week ago, I wasn't sure what was happening as I have never dealt with anxiety like that before. I thought I was going insane, like I was in a bad trip. This happened 3 weeks after moving in with my partner into our own place. We have been together over four years now, living before in a caravan on the property he co-owns with family. Since the night of the initial panic attack I've been in a terrified and very dark state. I've actually returned home for the time being with my own family. I'm scared everyday. I get horrible intrusive thoughts one of which is about my partner. My question now is why am I feeling anxiety when I think about him? When I am of clear mind I have no doubt I love him and want a good future together. Hell we've been through a lot over the years and I could not picture life without him. So why do I get the thoughts in my mind that I'm living a lie? That I don't love him anymore? These thoughts send me into a panic. I don't know what they mean, I feel guilty having them. He doesn't deserve to be thought about like that. He has done nothing wrong. I get myself into a state when these thoughts pop into my head and I have told him about the thoughts. He knows we'll be okay but I'm sure it's hurtful to hear that I'm doubting.How do you control these thoughts? Intrusive thoughts in general? We are both under financial stress paying off a home loan and rent on low incomes so I understand why I'm stressed but why do I keep feeling anxious when I think about him?I'm new to all this. I'm frightened. The doctor has prescribed an antidepressant (which I have another question about, I'll start a new post) and am starting sessions with a psychologist next week. I'm hoping this will get better.

Not coping with anxiety at all...

replies: 2

I have been struggling with depression for a few years, but recently came to accept the fact that I suffer from anxiety also. I am a fourth year hairdressing apprentice in a small salon, currently there is a lot of pressure on me to build my own clie... View more

I have been struggling with depression for a few years, but recently came to accept the fact that I suffer from anxiety also. I am a fourth year hairdressing apprentice in a small salon, currently there is a lot of pressure on me to build my own client base, but recently my confidence has plummeted and my boss is losing faith in me. I constantly am in fear of stuffing up a clients hair and my boss going mental at me. I am too afraid to seek a new job as I don't feel I have the confidence to to go to interviews and sell myself... I love hairdressing, but at the moment I just feel like packing it all in and starting anew because of the way I feel. I only have 3 months left of my apprenticeship, but I'm worried I won't be qualifiable when the time comes... It is affecting my self esteem, my relationship with my friends and I'm worried it will start to effect my relationship with my fiancé...

Hello, I am Steve

replies: 10

Hey everyone, My name's Steve, I'm new to the Beyond Blue forum haha. Allow me to introduce myself.. Like many, I too suffer from depression and anxiety. My time in primary and secondary schooling, was well.. The polar opposite of positive. Most of m... View more

Hey everyone, My name's Steve, I'm new to the Beyond Blue forum haha. Allow me to introduce myself.. Like many, I too suffer from depression and anxiety. My time in primary and secondary schooling, was well.. The polar opposite of positive. Most of my time in school was shrouded in misery, depression, unrelenting bullying and the list goes on. Despite my best efforts, I've been really struggling to deal with depression (due to unemployment) recently. In order to try and deter depression, I regularly hit the gym (3 times a week) for lengthy sessions at a time. While regularly attending gym is a good thing, it still does not fix the underlining problem of unemployment. After working out rigorously, I often find myself with too much time on my hands. I do enjoy maintaining a very clean car, but you can't be washing it daily lol. I do enjoy hitting the beach, but given that it is winter here in Melbourne, the cold ocean breeze does detract from the overall enjoyment of the beach haha. So why don't I go get a job?.. Ahh yes, easier said than done. When your someone like me, who gets discriminated from applying for jobs due to your heritage (despite having the essential licence), it makes applying for and being accepted for a job.. Impossible. I myself am not one to judge people, I am very accepting of all people, all shapes/sizes, heritage, religion etc. I never judge people on those particular things, but it seems that others judge me purely on my heritage. Maybe employers are scared that a young man with dark brown hair & eyes and olive/tanned skin wants to become a truck driver?, the possibilities are endless. If you must know, I am of Italian heritage. I can't understand why being of that heritage is disliked by employers, it's just ridiculous. I've found that by paying attention, listening and offering advice and tips to many other people in our community, it helps me too. I understand that there are many people who are suffering from depression for different reasons compared to me, It's something that i want to help people with. Having suffered from depression for many years, I'm definitely no stranger to it. I can well and truly relate to it and understand what many are going through. That's why I want to help people, to let them know their experiences are understandable. That's my brief introduction (not really brief, but you know what I mean), I look forward to speaking to and offering advice to many on this forum. Thank you for reading my thread

constant overthinking thoughts are taking over my life

replies: 3

Hello, this is my very first post to this page. I don't really know where my anxiety came from, I just noticed myself become a more insecure, shy, unconfident individual who always self doubts herself. I have so many conflicting thoughts and no matte... View more

Hello, this is my very first post to this page. I don't really know where my anxiety came from, I just noticed myself become a more insecure, shy, unconfident individual who always self doubts herself. I have so many conflicting thoughts and no matter what I do throughout my day I'm always overthinking everything, my head just controls me, it controls my thoughts. I want to have friends but i don't want to be the one to make the first move or conversation because I don't want to be annoying or a clingy friend and I always find myself saying if a person wanted to talk to me they'd speak to me first. I want to go out with friends but when the day comes I find myself dreading it and not wanting to go because I want to stay at home, home equals safe. I'm so unproductive with uni I just don't want to go anymore I don't want to leave my house. I've become such an angry person, I bottle things up, i hold grudges even though I don't want to, I just can't let things go no matter how hard I try to. I always feel as though that person doesn't desrve my forgiveness, even if it's something so petty, and I know it's petty I just won't let it go. I often tell myself the only person I can trust is myself because this world is filled with just horrible people who betray and hurt you. It gets worse late at night though when I am completely alone and have nothig to distract me, I feel worthless, unimportant, nonexistent, like nothing I do is good enough, I just don't think I belong in this world. I don't want to think or be like this I know it's unhealthy, I know it's not good but it controls the way I think, the way I feel. I feel so trapped I feel so alone sometimes. I can't reach out for help because how do you explain something like this to someone without them thinking your nuts. I've done counselling in the past and I didn't find it effective, I've tried writing in a journal and I used to find that helpful when I was younger but not so much now. I'm hoping talking to others will help My anxiety controls who I am and I want it to stop. It's ruining my life. I'll take any advice I can get. I need help please. I don't want to feel like this anymore.

Losing motivation to do anything, dealing with loneliness, depression creeping back...

replies: 6

HiI am a 21 year old male working full-time for a fairly large company. I was recently diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and was put on anti-depression medication after I began self harming once my closest friend forced me to seek help. T... View more

HiI am a 21 year old male working full-time for a fairly large company. I was recently diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and was put on anti-depression medication after I began self harming once my closest friend forced me to seek help. Things were getting better for a while, but for the last couple of months have gone bad. Whilst I see a councillor, I still feel extremely isolated, emotional at work and home, haven't yet been able to spark any passions back into my life, and sense as though my depression could get worse. My motivation keeps dwindling on things I used to do, like going to the gym or playing video games. I have a small circle of friends who I see every blue moon, and my family and I don't get on spectacularly (still live at home). I have just started a new job and haven't been able to make any friends since everyone in the office is rather introverted and I'm not particularly outgoing either. I've never had any meaningful relationships (recently came out to my parents and some friends as gay). I'm not hugely into the gay scene, nor am I particularly flamboyant either, so meeting other guys in person is impossible. Only through apps like Tinder/Grindr do I occasionally meet someone but it never lasts. I feel like if I knew someone actually cared for me (in an emotional/relationship context) I would probably feel more grounded and to get back on my feet a bit; invigorate my life a little.The nearest thing to a relationship I've had was about a month ago where I had been dating a guy for three weeks. We got along well. He even introduced me to his friends (a first) and I thought things were going pretty good, but after he travelled overseas for a few weeks, it seems he lost interest in me. I've tried to communicate with him on multiple occasions, but he would be very brief or wouldn't reply at all.All I want to do in my spare time is socialise with people. Since most of my friends are too busy, I end up talking to strangers on Grindr or Tinder to not feel so lonely. I'll just watch TV when I get home after a long commute from work everyday and go to bed. Weekends are pretty bad since I am so idle and have no idea what to do with myself. I just end up taking extensive naps so as to not be conscious and let my thoughts overcome me.Nothing interests me, people don't find me interesting and I've lost enjoyment from work and living.Just thought I'd post here if anyone had some suggestions on what I should do. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU JA X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

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New to this Forum? Please read this first!

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All discussions

Stressful job / what to do / trying to conceive / lost and depressed.

replies: 4

Problems with a girl. Feeling lonely and down

replies: 4

Struggling to cope with expectations, constant pressure and anxiety

replies: 1

Could this year get any worse.....?

replies: 2

In constant pain and fear

replies: 3

Anxious about Relationship

replies: 3

Not coping with anxiety at all...

replies: 2

Hello, I am Steve

replies: 10

constant overthinking thoughts are taking over my life

replies: 3

Losing motivation to do anything, dealing with loneliness, depression creeping back...

replies: 6

Young people

New to this Forum? Please read this first! replies: 0

Stressful job / what to do / trying to conceive / lost and depressed. replies: 4

Problems with a girl. Feeling lonely and down replies: 4

Struggling to cope with expectations, constant pressure and anxiety replies: 1

Could this year get any worse.....? replies: 2

In constant pain and fear replies: 3

Anxious about Relationship replies: 3

Not coping with anxiety at all... replies: 2

Hello, I am Steve replies: 10

constant overthinking thoughts are taking over my life replies: 3

Losing motivation to do anything, dealing with loneliness, depression creeping back... replies: 6

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

Stressful job / what to do / trying to conceive / lost and depressed.

replies: 4

Problems with a girl. Feeling lonely and down

replies: 4

Struggling to cope with expectations, constant pressure and anxiety

replies: 1

Could this year get any worse.....?

replies: 2

In constant pain and fear

replies: 3

Anxious about Relationship

replies: 3

Not coping with anxiety at all...

replies: 2

Hello, I am Steve

replies: 10

constant overthinking thoughts are taking over my life

replies: 3

Losing motivation to do anything, dealing with loneliness, depression creeping back...

replies: 6