Young people

Quit Job On My Second Day

replies: 11

Hey, first time posting on here Recently, my job agency organised a trial day for me at a particular store and was under the impression that they were not going to make me serve customers from behind the counter, which they did. The day after the tri... View more

Hey, first time posting on here Recently, my job agency organised a trial day for me at a particular store and was under the impression that they were not going to make me serve customers from behind the counter, which they did. The day after the trial I had got a phone call from my job agency telling me that they had given me the job and to start on Tuesday (7 days after trial), which was overwhelming as everything seemed to be happening so fast. Despite getting the position, I didn't have the courage to tell them that I didn't feel comfortable with a job that involved having to constantly serve and interact with customers. I'm going to have to go to a new job agency now, as they called me up today and mentioned that they are going to be getting a transfer form for me on my next appointment. Which is fine, they weren't the most helpful people outside of getting me this one job. I'm also pretty sure my decision not to continue working is going to affect my payments, but that is my own fault. My main concern is my family though. I've definitely let them down as they were pleased and proud to have heard that I had been giving an opportunity to work. I'm also a little angry with myself. I want to try and find work to make it up to everyone but don't really know what type of job I want to do that is low stress and doesn't require customer service. Doe's anyone have any suggestions?

Almost 22 - completely lacking direction and feeling unaccomplished

replies: 4

I'm turning 22 this year and I feel like my life has hit a bit of a wall - career wise. I was on a great track. Finished highschool, went straight into uni and graduated with an undergraduate degree in architecture. I took some time off before I was ... View more

I'm turning 22 this year and I feel like my life has hit a bit of a wall - career wise. I was on a great track. Finished highschool, went straight into uni and graduated with an undergraduate degree in architecture. I took some time off before I was meant to start my masters of architecture (according to my plan), because I felt like I wasn't sure if I was going down the right path anymore. Long story short I got so overwhelmed with making a decision about what to do that I overthought everything to the max. I made a decision to start a primary school teaching diploma this year (which is a one year course) and even though I'm more than half way through the semester, I again, don't feel great about it. I almost feel like I'm giving up and worked so hard for 3 years only to not finish architecture. My reasons for teaching also align with the fact that architecture is a damn hard industry to 'make' it in, ESPECIALLY for women. And I guess when I attempted to weigh everything up I thought teaching is great for having a family too - I'm thinking to myself, you can still be ambitious and be a teacher right? But the other half of me is saying - what are you thinking. Right now I'm feeling so unaccomplished and lacking direction, big time. I almost feel like teaching isn't enough of a challenge after how complex my architecture course was, I feel like even if I one day am I deputy or principal I still may not feel accomplished. And to even get to this point or any point in my career for anyone, you need motivation and commitment and even though this is how I would've described myself for so long, I'm lacking it all. I feel no motivation to put 100% effort into teaching and succeed and that's scary. (I mean absolutely no offence to anyone who is a teacher by the way - it is an incredibly demanding job) Also am i crazy for thinking the career doesn't show enough advancement? It almost like I went to primary school, high school and uni just to go back to square one. Yet again my alternative is to go back and start my masters. I just feel like a constant yoyo. I feel like I'm getting older and have less and less options and my career is slipping away. Would appreciate any advice on the situation - thanks

Pathological lying and it's really starting to affect my life and my family relations

replies: 2

Throughout my entire life, I have lied about all kinds of things, usually really minor things that shouldn't matter, but for whatever reason, I did it anyway. My parents always told me that if I told the truth, I might get into trouble, but that it w... View more

Throughout my entire life, I have lied about all kinds of things, usually really minor things that shouldn't matter, but for whatever reason, I did it anyway. My parents always told me that if I told the truth, I might get into trouble, but that it would often be much worse if I lied about it. For whatever reason, that never stuck in my brain. As things stand, I made a dumb decision at my work, and as a result I was terminated. I went home and told my parents an elaborate lie about the reasons why. I felt bad about what I had done to lost my job, in fact I felt bad and regretted it while I was doing it, but I didn't stop. I felt bad about lying to my parents, but I didn't stop. A colleague from work actually contacted my parents to inform them of the situation, and they confronted me about it. They're understandably really upset and disappointed, and I understand why. I just don't know why I keep lying about things. They used to be trivial things, but now I have lies going on about important things; like, am I going to university, I tell my parents that I am, but in reality I am not. I feel like them confronting me about my job has made me realize that I need help, but I have no idea where to start or how to fix things with my family. They've outright said that they don't trust or respect me anymore, which is fair, if not harsh. I've put them through so much over the years and I just don't know what to do or how they'll respond. Simply put, help...

Lost with a purpose

replies: 10

Hi, I am writing to you in hopes to finally let my thoughts spill. I guess its not difficult to say that i have experienced some very bad things in life, but what is really difficult is talking about the things that made it so difficult. My friend su... View more

Hi, I am writing to you in hopes to finally let my thoughts spill. I guess its not difficult to say that i have experienced some very bad things in life, but what is really difficult is talking about the things that made it so difficult. My friend suggested that i should talk to a councillor, but even after completing my Psychology degree, i am still not confident to finally say what i try to hide so much. I guess what i am about to say now is now even known by my friends, maybe by family. I am giving up in life. I know how absurd that sounds. I am only 22. What could of actually happened to lead me to feeling such way. I guess the answer is not simple, and i am still trying to find it myself. Firstly i guess its the discomfort i felt at home, the never ending fights, and the never ending tears. At one point in time i even started to hate myself for being so weak. I thought by now i should be used to it. But i guess what doesn't kill doesn't always makes you stronger in the end. For me i have become even more sensitive. I am starting to see the cracks in my life, and i am trying to hid them for everyone, even myself. I guess the social media has become my weapon of dealing with it. However i feel, i am not actually fighting it but hiding from it. Theres so much to talk about, yet so little i can actually can write. I could tell you about the abuse, the distrust, the emptiness, however i don't want to focus on the past but on the future. I am trying to create a better future, however i think i am lost at a place where even if i wanted to i wouldn't be able to move on. I know there is a better place, better state - I see it all around me. However i feel like i have lost the motivation do anything about it. I just want to know what i can do. Please help! Thanks for reading.

My whole character changed after one bad day.

replies: 2

Hey all. This is first time posting here and I didn't really know what category it would be under so I'm just gonna post in here. First a brief description of myself, I'm a male, 21 and currently studying illustration with a casual job in security. A... View more

Hey all. This is first time posting here and I didn't really know what category it would be under so I'm just gonna post in here. First a brief description of myself, I'm a male, 21 and currently studying illustration with a casual job in security. After year 12 I stayed in touch with my main two friends. We got together on new years and decided that we should celebrate by getting drunk and stealing garden lights. Stupid idea I know but we did it. We're about 4 houses in and where about to take another garden light when we hear a loud angry voice yell out some strong profanity at us. We run as fast as we can and hear the guy chasing us. The guy even has his dogs with him. Me and one of my friends hide behind a bush while the other just wont stop running. The dog finds us and chases us further. Its at this point I'm exhausted and I had a thought. I figured If I just stopped and got caught by this guy he'd stop chasing my friends and they'd get home to safety. I don't know what made me think of that in the heat of the moment but I stopped and immediately was grabbed by this guy. I cant see him clearly since its night but as soon as I turn around he starts hitting me in the head and then hitting me while I'm on the ground. He grabs me in a choke hold and drags me to his house. He attempts to call his friends to all come bash me but they were all busy luckily. The whole time he was telling me how my friends left me for dead. Then my friends came back. I was so grateful. He yelled at all of us and after a while told us to leave. I never pressed charges or told the police because in my mind it was over. I felt different though. I felt powerless and weak. Being confident is no longer something I do. You can imagine how this affected my job as a security guard. There've been many times where I feel like I'm getting better but something just sets me off. The main one however was a few months ago when I bought a house and let these same friends rent there. I took one of them out of a complete dump and gave him EXTREME mates rates. I had one rule and that was to not do drugs in the house. I knew my friends smoked weed. I never have and never will. Its good for a month then they start ignoring my wishes and do whatever they want. Weed and Ecstasy and when I question them they get angry. They told me and my mum to f off. I kicked them all out of the house and my life. I was betrayed by the people I trusted most and now its impossible for me to believe in people.

I'm trapped in my own circle

replies: 3

Hi guys, I'm stuck. I'm in my final year of chemical engineering, and trying to do a company based thesis, working 3 jobs intermittently to pay for living expenses, I live 300km's from my family, and I'm on the mend from some serious depression and a... View more

Hi guys, I'm stuck. I'm in my final year of chemical engineering, and trying to do a company based thesis, working 3 jobs intermittently to pay for living expenses, I live 300km's from my family, and I'm on the mend from some serious depression and anxiety I've suffered from for 4-5 years. The good news is, I AM on the mend, and I'm actually doing ok - I have great friends, an amazing boyfriend, my family knows everything I've been through, I have a regular psych and doctor who are great, and I'm generally doing ok most of the time. However, I still have an inability to cope with life in general. Stress is a killer for me, and the fact I'm a perfectionist makes it so much harder. I hate engineering in general. There are very few things I like about the course, and the only reason I'm doing it is for the money, and to be able to say "I'm an engineer". These are bad reasons, I know, but it's a bit late to change it now. I've been working at this 4 year course for 6 years now, and I'm 1/4 of the way through my final year. Things are intense, and insanely difficult and stressful, and life is stressful, and I am ready to yell and scream at everyone that I don't want to do it anymore. The problem is, it's me who put myself in this position. I am the one who continued to do this course, semester after semester, despite not enjoying it, and the stress almost kills me. I am sick a lot of the time purely because I'm always so run down, and I don't have a lot of money so I don't always eat properly, I can't afford to see my psych or my doctor at this point (even with the mental health care plan I'm on), and I'm feeling so trapped. I know if I continue, I will be unhappy for the next 8 months, and it will have the potential to destroy everything I've built so far, or spin me out of control again. But I also know that if I stop, I will consider it as a failure, and that will trigger my depression and I'll slip back to where I've been trying to get away from. I'm in this stupid circle where I don't want to go forwards OR backwards, and I refuse to defer my course because it's been 6 years already!!! I just don't know how to take another step, no matter how small. I want to run away, or hide under my doona until it all disappears. People say to me "You're doing great, just take it one step at a time" and I want to scream at them. People say "Just try writing the headings of your thesis" and I shut down and internally scream NO! I'm stuck and don't know what to do

Unwanted Thoughts

replies: 5

Hi, So, I don't really know how to start this or what to say as this is my first time posting here. Well, I guess I should begin by saying that well, I have an obsessive compulsive disorder and I need someone who understands the disorder to help me. ... View more

Hi, So, I don't really know how to start this or what to say as this is my first time posting here. Well, I guess I should begin by saying that well, I have an obsessive compulsive disorder and I need someone who understands the disorder to help me. I see a psychologist and everything but I don't have 24/7 access to her, my parents don't really understand my situation due to cultural differences I guess you could say and my friends have their own burdens to deal with then to constantly comfort me. So, I thought I'd come here to seek some support because I don't really know what else to do. My anxiety isn't too bad, I mean I wash my hands way more often then I should and become anxious over things that I shouldn't be anxious about, but whenever those sorts of things begin to subside, the obsessive side of the equation, the thoughts begin to overpower me. The thoughts can be so awful and debilitating, I honestly just can't stand it anymore. I can't stand being around myself anymore because I'm scared of my thoughts, I'm scared of acting on them or giving in to them, I'm scared of losing myself to them and after everything I've been through I just cannot stand losing to them. I just need some tips or suggestions that will help me deal with this, that will help me avoid the thoughts and push them away. Any advice at all would be a major help, I know that I'm not the only one that deals with this and its a long battle but I just don't really know what else to do about it. Thank you for your time.

I'm tired and lack all motivation

replies: 2

I have no energy to pull myself out of bed in the mornings anymore because I don't feel like anything i'm doing is worth putting effort into. I wake up, go to tafe, come home, sleep for hours, wake up , panic about tafe the next morning, cry and then... View more

I have no energy to pull myself out of bed in the mornings anymore because I don't feel like anything i'm doing is worth putting effort into. I wake up, go to tafe, come home, sleep for hours, wake up , panic about tafe the next morning, cry and then sleep again. I repeat this cycle every week of my life and it's killing me. I don't have enough energy to spend time with friends and be happy as well as persue my course at tafe. I have to schedule out my 'happiness' and live through weeks telling myself that "it's okay, on wednesday two weeks from now you can take a rest and be happy, just wait until then" thats not how i'm meant to be living and I have no idea how i'm meant to fix it, I really need advice on how to overcome feeling so worthless.

So confused and anxious about my relationship in crisis

replies: 9

I feel so utterly helpless about my relationship and don't know what I'm doing with my life. I've been in a relationship for over 5 years, its become so toxic and I just want to give up. We're both 30. A few years back I broke up with him as I felt t... View more

I feel so utterly helpless about my relationship and don't know what I'm doing with my life. I've been in a relationship for over 5 years, its become so toxic and I just want to give up. We're both 30. A few years back I broke up with him as I felt trapped in the relationship and like I had enough, there wasn't a reason I just felt we weren't connecting. We got back together and still saw each other, he was there for me with my anxiety and depression,but I still didn't feel sure about the relationship. He was there for me and I felt I couldn't let go. When he went to his family interstate I went on a few dates, but nothing came of the dates but I never told him. He's a genuine, kind guy I feel so bad things are still not working. He has so much hope and positivity for our relationship and always tells me that I am the person that he cares about more than any one in the world. He is a really decent guy. But why after all these yrs am I still so confused? Its gotten worse recently as we live together & our sex life is non-existent. I never feel in the mood to be with him that that way. Also, last year he proposed, and I still haven't decided if its what I want. He proposed in Europe & and wanted it to be really special. We fought nearly every single day. About what we were doing, just in general I can't communicate with him. He is quiet and usually fine to just do what I want, rather than tell me what he wants. In Amsterdam I tried some marijuana and had a terrible reaction, and I blamed him for telling me to do 2 joints. I felt let down that he told me to take 2. Towards the end I had a massive anxiety and depression. I threatened to leave and just take a flight back home as I had had enough. I was so stressed, stressed over all of the silly arguments we were having on a daily basis. He got so angry & upset I was getting so anxious and yelling in the hotel at him, and he threw an engagement ring he had bought in my face. I was distraught. It was the perfect ring but now it has such bad memories. He was devastated that he'd thrown it at me. I had no idea he had wanted to propose, our relationship was not going well before the trip. Although I said yes, when we got back home I still felt so stressed about our relationship, and I have not told anyone, Ive only told my mum. This was 6mths ago and I still don't know what Im doing. We've started counselling now but I feel like counselling isn't enough. Should I just give the relationship up/ Pls help

Lonely reality for a 20 year old

replies: 4

I am a 20 year old law student who works part-time as a bartender, and I have been experiencing persistent feelings of loneliness. I am single, but my loneliness is not stemming from lacking a partner. No, its stemming from a lack of meaningful frien... View more

I am a 20 year old law student who works part-time as a bartender, and I have been experiencing persistent feelings of loneliness. I am single, but my loneliness is not stemming from lacking a partner. No, its stemming from a lack of meaningful friendships with other people (especially guys my age). As a uni student who is also working, life can be pretty busy, and finding time for a social life is difficult. Looking at the people I do associate with though, it leaves something to be desired. I have tons of acquaintances at uni who I work together in the same unit and assignments - but outside of that we have nothing to solidify a friendship, and once the unit finishes, so does our connection. Similar situation with work, except colleagues are not interested in having any further interaction (and fair enough too I suppose). Apart from the acquaintances, I do have 'closer' friends from either high school or uni that have a bit more substance. Problem is that the interest is really disappearing. I try to make plans to catch up with them and they seem keen initially and we set a date, then the night before or on the day they cancel with excuses that just become flimsier as time goes by. It's also almost a miracle for someone to ever want to make plans with me. Oh well, I guess their lives are busy too and they're moving on to new friends (something I wish I had more success in). I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm running out of friends, have so little time to myself as it is, and I feel like I have no prospects to make new, meaningful friendships. I think part of the problem also relates to Facebook in a way. I feel like many people my age are too obsessed with their image and this superficial idea of friendship (number of friends, likes etc) they have forgotten how to have, and maintain a sustainable friendship. To have some investment in it, and to have mutual respect and support. I try to be the best friend I can be, but it just feels like I'm the only one who is even making an effort. Sorry if this seem a bit muddled up, but I would definitely appreciate any advice

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New to this Forum? Please read this first!

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Quit Job On My Second Day

replies: 11

Almost 22 - completely lacking direction and feeling unaccomplished

replies: 4

Pathological lying and it's really starting to affect my life and my family relations

replies: 2

Lost with a purpose

replies: 10

My whole character changed after one bad day.

replies: 2

I'm trapped in my own circle

replies: 3

Unwanted Thoughts

replies: 5

I'm tired and lack all motivation

replies: 2

So confused and anxious about my relationship in crisis

replies: 9

Lonely reality for a 20 year old

replies: 4

Young people

New to this Forum? Please read this first! replies: 0

Quit Job On My Second Day replies: 11

Almost 22 - completely lacking direction and feeling unaccomplished replies: 4

Pathological lying and it's really starting to affect my life and my family relations replies: 2

Lost with a purpose replies: 10

My whole character changed after one bad day. replies: 2

I'm trapped in my own circle replies: 3

Unwanted Thoughts replies: 5

I'm tired and lack all motivation replies: 2

So confused and anxious about my relationship in crisis replies: 9

Lonely reality for a 20 year old replies: 4

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

Quit Job On My Second Day

replies: 11

Almost 22 - completely lacking direction and feeling unaccomplished

replies: 4

Pathological lying and it's really starting to affect my life and my family relations

replies: 2

Lost with a purpose

replies: 10

My whole character changed after one bad day.

replies: 2

I'm trapped in my own circle

replies: 3

Unwanted Thoughts

replies: 5

I'm tired and lack all motivation

replies: 2

So confused and anxious about my relationship in crisis

replies: 9

Lonely reality for a 20 year old

replies: 4