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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Zacharie_E The 1st Step
  • replies: 11

Hello, where should I begin? I am 19 years of age. I was a weird kid in primary school. I had this 1 super close friend who I'll call Dillon. Dillon was just a weird as I was. We were obsessed with espionage and played games where we'd pretend to be ... View more

Hello, where should I begin? I am 19 years of age. I was a weird kid in primary school. I had this 1 super close friend who I'll call Dillon. Dillon was just a weird as I was. We were obsessed with espionage and played games where we'd pretend to be spies. Yes we got bullied, victimised blah blah you know the story, though I wasn't physically bashed or even pushed around or anything like that, it was purely verbal. What matters though is that I never once retaliated. In fact, I actually ended up joining the bullies and turned against Dillon. I was so weak willed, I turned against my only friend out of fear of not being accepted. Dillon's family eventually moved away and I never saw him again. Then I made a few new friends, but I did terrible things to them too. Why? Because the bullies told me to. Never did I once stick up for my friends or myself. Not once. Pathetic. High school came around and I went to a different school to everyone else. All alone, I made my 1st friend the 1st day; Socrates. This time everyone was kind to me in the grade. A protected world with no conflict, the classic Oedipal nightmare. Plus I had my actual friends (not the bullies) from primary school that I had as well. We found passion for surfing and would go every weekend. Socrates lived pretty far, but I'd go to his house now and again. But everything I did with my friends was superficial. I never truly opened up to them, never cried, never got angry, never fought. I never let them see my flaws. Some of my other friends did bully Socrates, but of course I didn't stick up for him. I didn't turn against him either though. I just stood in the middle, smiling emptily at both sides. My primary school friends and I were really into surfing, so it was a real dilemma when I was the 1st to get bored of it. Instead of telling them, I'd make up lies that I couldn't go. Then I avoided them as much as I could, despite how good friends they were to me. High school finished, and I finally realised there was something wrong with me. I know the importance of being truthful, but the past 18 years has built deception into me. I'm so terrified of speaking about my problems. But I am smart. I know the key to overcoming fear is to break it down into it's smaller parts. So me writing online this is the 1st part. I'm going to overcome this fear no matter what. Thanks for reading.

Liaa Scared I'm Becoming Depressed?
  • replies: 1

I'm new to this website, so I don't know if I'm saying too little or too much. I'm only 12 years old, and I'm scared that I'm becoming depressed. I just started high school and things haven't gone well. I always had a best friend in primary school, b... View more

I'm new to this website, so I don't know if I'm saying too little or too much. I'm only 12 years old, and I'm scared that I'm becoming depressed. I just started high school and things haven't gone well. I always had a best friend in primary school, but she went to a different school and we barely talk anymore. She was the person I trusted the most (Even though I doubted her a little), and now she's not there I feel alone. I have other friends, but we aren't as close and they have personalities that don't match with mine. There's nothing to look forward to, so I faked being sick and missed 6 weeks of the school year so far. Things could've been different if I had a sibling, but I'm an only child. I was adopted when little so my parents are 40 years older than me. My dad's temper is getting worse and my mum has bad arthritis in her hip which can make her snap at me a lot. Even if I tell them anything, I feel like they'd get mad or try to tell the school which I don't really want. It's probably the right thing to do but I'd hate if they told the other people in my grade to talk to me just so I don't feel alone. I also hate being the centre of attention. Since I don't really have anyone to vent to, I try to take my mind off of it by watching videos and browsing the internet. It was going well until I realised I need to catch up on a lot of schoolwork. I really don't want my parents to be upset with me and want to make them proud, but I'm not motivated to do anything. I've always gotten decent grades and I'm really scared I'll get a D this semester. I've always had anxiety, but it wasn't that significant. Now I get crying fits that are starting to happen more often, especially when I think about my friends. I talk to a few people online who go to a different school but something about them makes me feel like they're going to get me into trouble someday. This probably sounds all over the place, which is basically how my mind is right now. 2017 is the year that I'm trying to figure out who I am, and all of this isn't helping. I want to be successful in life and live with no regrets but I honestly don't want to get out of bed in the morning. I keep reminding myself that there are people in worse situations than me but it doesn't help. I know I sound really immature, but I've never dealt with anything like this before. What I'm trying to ask is, how do I motivate myself to study? I feel like if I get good grades it would boost my self esteem.

Andon How do i deal with my Anxiety??
  • replies: 5

Okay, so I haven't yet been diagnosed with Anxiety, however I'm more than positive that I have It, and multiple types as well. For the past 12-24 months I've been having extremely bad panic attacks (mostly when I'm playing basketball) and I don't kno... View more

Okay, so I haven't yet been diagnosed with Anxiety, however I'm more than positive that I have It, and multiple types as well. For the past 12-24 months I've been having extremely bad panic attacks (mostly when I'm playing basketball) and I don't know how I can prevent them... I've tried the whole slow deep breathing thing and nothing seems to be working. I always have self doubt, like I'm not doing anything right and that I'm letting everyone down (mainly my parents and other family members). I just really need some advice on how I can manage my anxiety and ways so that I don't have these severe panic attacks all the time. Honestly I've tried so much so anything would be helpful... PLEASE!

VeeTee Another anxiety problem or is this normal?
  • replies: 1

So, I've had Social Anxiety since year 6. I'm now in year 11. I thought I should add this in - just in case. Recently I've been noticing that I do some "abnormal" stuff - to me at least. - Context - With my social anxiety, most of the time I don't ar... View more

So, I've had Social Anxiety since year 6. I'm now in year 11. I thought I should add this in - just in case. Recently I've been noticing that I do some "abnormal" stuff - to me at least. - Context - With my social anxiety, most of the time I don't argue or try to justify my actions. Even if I feel my actions were 100% correct. Most of the time when i'm being told off by anyone (including my friends that i'm not extremely close with - not in a mean way, just to help me) - I will get extremely scared (They must hate me now, I'm done for, etc.) and I'll end up agreeing with that they're saying (yea, i know, yea, sorry...). This however, I think comes out as me being a bit "obnoxious". I had to cut out the story because there is a character limit. Basically I have a new teacher teaching my class. She makes us do a group task. I'm forced to go with "bad" people. That is, people the teacher constantly tells off - They're not bad people, I meant bad in the teachers view (noisy and all). There is a misunderstanding and she thinks I freeloaded the whole class (1 hr+) and she goes crazy on me. I've never had a teacher shout at me in my life. Being me, I end up panicking and agreeing to everything - sounding obnoxious along the way. She makes me do something that scares me heaps because it involves debating alone in front of a class. - Problem - I usually think about stuff in the future and get sad/scared. Crying myself to sleep and all. With what happened - forced to debate alone and having a teacher hate me (I think) in the subject I excelled in - caused me to worry a lot. I started thinking about scenarios and I would "blank" out. Once I finish blanking out, I would realize that my heart would beat fast and I would feel "oxygen high"/"adrenaline high". Oxygen high being, when you breathe in and out fast you feel weird. Sorry, I don't know what it's called. Till now and still going, I would blank out and have scenarios in my head where i'm extremely sad/angry - distressed - and sometimes I would feel like crying, and sometimes I would get "oxygen high". My mum thinks i'm ignoring her, and I feel bad. I don't want to ignore her, but I can't stop blanking out. In class, I blank out and in and out. It's a cycle. Is this a thing? Is this known as something? Did my social anxiety stem to other problems? I've looked into panic attacks, but I don't think that's what it is. Any help would be lovely, thanks so much!

Jackson1994 Career pressure
  • replies: 6

I can't deal with this pressure from my step dad about what I want to do anymore!! I don't know!! And I'm sick of it. The fact that I don't know is what is ruining me the most but then his added pressure is just making this worse! It's as if I don't ... View more

I can't deal with this pressure from my step dad about what I want to do anymore!! I don't know!! And I'm sick of it. The fact that I don't know is what is ruining me the most but then his added pressure is just making this worse! It's as if I don't already know that I need to find something, he doesn't have to tell me that. Stop asking me if I've applied for uni I haven't because i don't know what to do!!

solaris helping a friend through depression
  • replies: 5

i've recently made a new friend, we've been talking to each other for about 3 weeks and he has recently opened up about his depression and i really wanna know how i can help him and what a could do for him. he told me he feels like he's just 'wasting... View more

i've recently made a new friend, we've been talking to each other for about 3 weeks and he has recently opened up about his depression and i really wanna know how i can help him and what a could do for him. he told me he feels like he's just 'wasting away' and i'm not sure how i can help, i wanna be there for him but sometimes i really just don't know. I've started to develop feelings for him so i really care about him and i don't want him to hurt himself, i wanna be able to help him through this.

solaris i have a bf but i also like this other guy
  • replies: 3

so i have a boyfriend and we've only been dating for 9 weeks or so and over the past week I've realised i like this other guy and I'm stressing out cause i don't know what to do. i think i wanna break up with my boyfriend but i don't know how to. als... View more

so i have a boyfriend and we've only been dating for 9 weeks or so and over the past week I've realised i like this other guy and I'm stressing out cause i don't know what to do. i think i wanna break up with my boyfriend but i don't know how to. also I'm new to this and i would really just like some help

wilfredpickles I can't decide whether travelling is going to be good for me
  • replies: 4

Last year during my worst period of depression and anxiety a new acquaintance invited me to travel with him and a mutual friend, and now our departure date is weeks away. I said yes, but the thought of the trip never really excited me; I'd been to al... View more

Last year during my worst period of depression and anxiety a new acquaintance invited me to travel with him and a mutual friend, and now our departure date is weeks away. I said yes, but the thought of the trip never really excited me; I'd been to all of the destinations before. I sat through the planning stage and was always the last to contribute ideas, or pay deposits, figuring my enthusiasm would come later. But it didn't. If I'm honest, I said yes not to have something to look forward to, but something that I had to keep being alive to do; an obligation. Later on, the mutual friend's father became sick. It looked like he might not go and I felt trapped. If i cancelled now, the acquaintance would be stuck unable to go at all (the friend has since decided to go). And so I've suffered in silence until recently, when I began to explore the option of cancelling. If I were to cancel, I'd get about half of the money I've spent back, which is a little over a third of what the trip would cost if i were to go. The costs for the other two people wouldn't change. My biggest problems are that if I go, I'm not sure that anyone will enjoy themselves as much given that everyone is now aware of how I feel. My friends have said that they only want me there if I want to be there. At the same time, if I cancel I'm worried about the embarrassment I'll feel when explaining to people why I cancelled (my family, for eg, stigmatise mental illness a lot). I've always felt that I didn't want to go on this trip, and the thought of doing so has caused my mental health to take a turn for the worse again. Cancelling has become unexpectedly possible, and I'm relieved about it, but part of me is still reluctant to do so for some reason. I'm fine with the amount of money I'd lose by cancelling, but the thought of spending even more on this trip bothers me when I'm not passionate about it and I don't want to lose all of my savings. I just feel like I'm going to face pressure either way and can't decide what to do.

bornto_ I have depression, avoidant personality disorder, selective mutism and i need help
  • replies: 3

Hello, here is a backstory so readers have some understanding of my situation. When i started high school my 2 best friends left me and this put me into a deep hole of depression. In year 5 i was terrified of going to high school, i broke down in tea... View more

Hello, here is a backstory so readers have some understanding of my situation. When i started high school my 2 best friends left me and this put me into a deep hole of depression. In year 5 i was terrified of going to high school, i broke down in tears thinking about moving to high school. I had 2 best friends that were coming with me to the same high school so i was reasurred that i would have them. The first day of high school was good, my freinds were there for me and everything was normal but over the next 2 days things started to get bad. They started to ignore me and leave me out of stuff and the next day one of them outright told me to go away. This started my depression, avoidant personality disorder and selective mutism. After that happened i would sit by myself away from people in recess and lunch. I began being silent, i wouldnt speak to anyone especially the students, if i had to i would speak to the teacher. People ignored me, even the teachers, i feel invisible, non-existent and nobody cares about me. I am currently in year 10 and nothing has changed. I have not left my house for 2 years except to go to school. I take days off school because of how depessed i feel, i hate going to school just to be ignored. I have no one to talk to except my family and i havent told them about my depression and other issues becasue im scared it will ruin our relationship, but im sure that my close family members can tell because i dont leave the house except to go to school. One person did often come sit next to me in recess and lunch over 5 months and i built some what of a relationship with them. I trusted this person enough to send them a message opening up about everything and they never talked or messaged me for 3 weeks after that, all it would have took was for them to ask me if i was ok or to show that they cared. I dont know what to do anymore, i need help but i dont know where to get it. I dont want to speak to a school councellor because being at school gives me anxiety and i cant open up at school. I just want to be confident again and be able to do whatever without feeling judged for everything i do, because its having an impact on my education. I dont want to care about what other people think of me, and i want to live my life to the fullest but theses issues are restricting me so much and its impossible to change anything by myself.

bellaxj Hiya
  • replies: 3

Hi, I'm new here xD

Hi, I'm new here xD

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