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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Chatterbox1 ROCD :(
  • replies: 7

Hi guys, Nearly 20 year old, in a relationship with an amazing man coming up 6 months. Diagnosed with Anxiety and OCD 3 months ago, had OCD since I was in primary school. Felt doubt for the first time Valentine’s day over money issues, the doubt went... View more

Hi guys, Nearly 20 year old, in a relationship with an amazing man coming up 6 months. Diagnosed with Anxiety and OCD 3 months ago, had OCD since I was in primary school. Felt doubt for the first time Valentine’s day over money issues, the doubt went away after I wrote down my feelings and spoke to my cousin. A bit later they came back, full force. This includes vomiting in the morning, loss of appetite, panic attacks and constant crying. He broke up with me, he couldn’t handle my doubts, I would’ve done the same, as he had no idea what I was going through. We patched it up after I went to my first psychologist session. I fell in love with him. Constant intrusive thoughts like “You don’t like or love him”, “What if you’re leading him on”, “You just don’t want to break up with him bc you work together”, “What if you’re not meant to be together”. These thoughts killed me inside. A psychic came into work and read me and jokingly I said “Are my partner and I going to be together forever?” and he replied with, “what is it you want?”, a coworker said “that must mean you’re not sure”, and I keep having thoughts about that now. I am currently PMSing, which makes it worse. Past few days I’ve been thinking “What if I don’t want to be with him anymore”, “You’re gonna break up with him” and every time I think that’s a stupid thought, I feel a bit of relief for like 30 seconds then I doubt again! I get good days, where I’m in love and feel it, and I have an amazing time with him, and I obviously get my bad days. This is just so frustrating. I ended up leaving my Psychologist as she made me feel bad about a decision I made, and told me it was irrational and that I shouldn't have done it (it was just getting a tablet with my partner under my name). I also have to touch certain things and do certain things, and if I don't my mind tells me my partner and I will break up. I know I want to be with him, I know this doubt and anxiety can be overcome. I just get so fearful, like what if I'm wrong. My OCD tells me, "what if I'm just convincing myself and lying to him, and to myself?" I don't want that to be the case. I just want to know that I’m not alone, that I’m not crazy. That there’s hope, I don’t want this relationship to go down the trash, we have so much potential together. I want, and during good days, can see a future with this man. Anyone else feel like this too? Sincerely, Chatterbox1

Sherrie_Day Lonely, but I don't feel alone?
  • replies: 2

Apologies if this thread has already occurred, I just wasn't able to find it... Recently the people that mean the most in my life have been saying that I see to see more people and hang out with my friends. I have worked on keeping relationships stro... View more

Apologies if this thread has already occurred, I just wasn't able to find it... Recently the people that mean the most in my life have been saying that I see to see more people and hang out with my friends. I have worked on keeping relationships strong for many years, and I feel like no one apprechaited it. When I try to hang out with my friends and I never think they enjoy my company and then I find out that they all see each other often, with out me. So I lost hope. I don't think anyone wants to see me apart from my boyfriend of 3 years or my parents. The thing that I have an issue with is that everyone tells me that my attitude is wrong but I am perfectly, couldn't be more happy or excited to just be by myself and never see friends again. I am happy to go to parties and social gatherings to see people temporarily and everyone at that time says how "we need to ctach up" but when I try to follow through I get no response. I have tried explaining this to my partner and parents - That I don't want to have friends anymore and I always want to just be by myself, partner or my horses. Is this totally wrong....? I woud like some help as to why is it good to have friends or why I need them. I have great confidence and self esteme so I can rule that out. Anyones opnions or thoughts would be graetly apprechaited. Thank you.

Megabelle I lost my path along the way...
  • replies: 4

Hi guys, Not really sure what's going on. I've never been someone to reach out to other people, but I've kinda fallen into a heap this year and I can't really talk to anyone at the moment for advice. So I have my last university exam for this semeste... View more

Hi guys, Not really sure what's going on. I've never been someone to reach out to other people, but I've kinda fallen into a heap this year and I can't really talk to anyone at the moment for advice. So I have my last university exam for this semester tomorrow. I've already had to withdraw from 2 units in week 7 because I couldn't meet attendance requirements. So out of the 2 units I'm sitting exams for, I found out yesterday that I failed the only other unit I'm taking this semester. I've never failed a subject in my life and I don't really know where to go from here. Because of that one failed unit, I can't continue my degree, as it's a pre-requisite, so I'm stuck in no-man's land for a semester, trying to work out how I messed up so bad and how to tell my family. I don't know if I can make it through tomorrow's exam, and I'm terrified and I feel like I have no direction anymore. All of my motivation has vanished and I'm not even sure why I'm still doing this course.

RainYSun What should I do with my future T^T
  • replies: 1

My life...is pretty annoying right now. I don't know what to do. I originally wanted to graduate Highschool, go to Uni, draw manga for a living. I've been avoiding this for a long time.....but I actually want to be a Kpop idol. I am an Asian who live... View more

My life...is pretty annoying right now. I don't know what to do. I originally wanted to graduate Highschool, go to Uni, draw manga for a living. I've been avoiding this for a long time.....but I actually want to be a Kpop idol. I am an Asian who lives in Australia. I really admire many Kpop idols especially BTS for all those people they've inspired, and how far they have maded through hard work and how much they've done to achieve their dreams. I want to be someone like them, not a pop star, but an idol. So what's annoying about this? There are a few factors that come in play and the first one is that everyone expects me to become a manga artist and I do love drawing manga and not meaning to brag, I am very talented in it. Singing, dancing, rapping, I am only a bit above average those but it's not something that people think I'll do. I'm not sure that if I ever become a Kpop idol would people be like "why though? It's such a shame, you were so great at drawing." I don't think my parents will support me at all because I'm "so good at drawing so why not make a living out of drawing?" another one is, I am not a Korean citizen and has to finish school. I'm in Highschool right now and once I graduate I'll be 17. In Korea, its best to become a trainee when you're below the age of twenty, and I don't think I'll be good enough at Korean (I am making progress on it though) and have enough money to move to Korea, support myself while living there and to be smart enough to study there. I just don't think I'll have enough time to do all of that stuff. and yet another one, even if I managed to live there and gain support from people. I'm not a particular gender and would not want to be a girl but even if I was a in a guy group I'm not physically a guy. In Korea you are assigned either to a female group or male group. I do not want to be solo artist...Will I have to do FtM transition? Yes gender is another topic, I wish I was a male, it's not about stereotype s or gender roles, it's just having female parts annoy me and I do not like having a higher pitched soft sound. I don't feel like a female either but I'm not male at the same time but will Korea accept that? I want to become a Kpop idol and not just some random idol from Australia who is Chinese. They are great but...they lack something that Kpop idols have. I just...don't know what to do.

JazM Everything at once...
  • replies: 2

I feel like i have had a realisation of how many things i am sick of living with. I was diagnosed with epilepsy at the end of 2012 (having just graduated high school), and since then i have had a seizure every 6 months or so, so as a result i have no... View more

I feel like i have had a realisation of how many things i am sick of living with. I was diagnosed with epilepsy at the end of 2012 (having just graduated high school), and since then i have had a seizure every 6 months or so, so as a result i have not been able to get my license to drive, meaning i have to rely on other people to drive me around, or catch public transport, or get ubers. My seizures have also severely affected my memory, both long and short term (i forget memories from years ago, and its hard to retain information and i will quickly forget things, which makes it hard to learn new things), after talking to my neurologist about it, he said that we just have to stop the seizures and it shouldnt get worse. It also makes my hands quite shaky. The fact that it is so hard to get to many places by buses/trains means usually i have to pay for an uber, or pitch in petrol money for friends (which is way more than it should be, they have become less sympathetic over the years), and now that i have no income it makes these things so much harder. Every job ive ever had has been through my mum, so the fact that i cant even get a job by myself makes me feel pretty down. My dream career is vet nursing, i did a course for it and (after eventually getting a job) loved it, i love animals and it was so rewarding. But my memory was greatly impacting my work and i had to quit before i forgot anything that could be crucial for a patient's survival. (I also am terribly allergic to animals which is another way my body lets me down) Im terrible at making friends and keeping them, the only "friends" i still have are from highschool (i thought i had made a few friends during my tafe course, but they disappeared pretty quick after the course ended). And even my current friends are catching up behind my back, noone ever wants to catch up with just me, im only there when the whole group is there). Makes me question whether im even worth hanging out with tbh. I used to be able to get by when i had a job, but my hours just got reduced to 0 and i have no driving force in life anymore. The things i used to love doing dont make me happy anymore (i loved sketching, but with my shaky hands im much worse at it, i love video games but i feel like its wasting time, i love learning but its almost impossible anymore). I just want to be independent for once in my life and not have to rely on everyone around me for everything. I feel useless and cant see my life going anywhere..

peachy101 Separation Anxiety within a relationship
  • replies: 5

Firstly I'll give an insight into my relationship to help base your advice around. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. We are very close and have helped each other go through good and bad times. We do argue over silly things however mo... View more

Firstly I'll give an insight into my relationship to help base your advice around. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. We are very close and have helped each other go through good and bad times. We do argue over silly things however most of the time we are completely happy in every aspect and we love to be in each other's company. However for the last 6 months, I become depressed or anxious whenever I am not with him. I'm currently in Year 12 (VCE) and I love having someone to be completely free with but on Sunday nights when we part (for work and school), I start to become overwhelmed by the thought of not being able to see him until the weekend (or sometimes I see him Wednesday nights). He is usually at work, gym, soccer etc and he doesn't seem to have the separation anxiety that I suffer from. He does miss me and he values the time we spend together however I seem to become very anxious whenever I'm not with him. I don't know how to deal with things if he's not with me. If I'm home alone (because mums at work) I can't do homework, I can't practise dancing... I go into shutdown and just lay in bed on my phone waiting until I can call him or text him etc. It's so unhealthy especially when I have so much on and I feel that my anxiety is getting in the way of me achieving my goals in school and dancing etc. I just want an explanation or ways that I could deal with this. I have so many things that 'should' keep me occupied but I get too upset and overwhelmed by not having him with me that I can't physically or mentally do any of the important things such as chores, dancing, homework, working out etc. Any suggestions or thoughts please??

collectivecreative University
  • replies: 6

So I like uni. Ive made a tonne of friends I actually like (unlike many of my friends from school who say they can't find friends at uni) and I enjoy going to classes/discussing topics of real importance to me. But I've always suffered from depressio... View more

So I like uni. Ive made a tonne of friends I actually like (unlike many of my friends from school who say they can't find friends at uni) and I enjoy going to classes/discussing topics of real importance to me. But I've always suffered from depression/anxiety (since primary school) and I have an intense phobia of studying that I've developed. I just can't do the work. So right now I'm avoiding classes which I enjoy and have stopped attempting assessments as I know I can't complete them. I have the option of pulling out of class this semester but I've already put so much time into it and my parents will be disappointed. I don't know what to do and I don't want to ruin my future by deferring from uni for a bit.

TaylorK How to leave the love of your life?
  • replies: 3

I suffered from anxiety for about two years and right now I'm reaching a breaking point that I can't return from. My boyfriend has supported me through my recent depressive explosions these past months. I had problems keeping my previous jobs as I wo... View more

I suffered from anxiety for about two years and right now I'm reaching a breaking point that I can't return from. My boyfriend has supported me through my recent depressive explosions these past months. I had problems keeping my previous jobs as I would have anxiety attacks and faint at work. I have had various interviews and been offered multiple jobs but when it comes to the night before the first day I spend the entire night throwing up, shaking and in tears. My boyfriend is working two jobs trying to keep us a float. His friends are going out to concerts and trips camping and he says no because he has to work and I just can't get out of bed in the morning. He has been my rock through all of this. He has such bad days but I know he puts on a brave face for me but it breaks my heart to think I can no longer be an adequate partner and I'm not meeting his emotional needs. I'm wondering if it would be better to move back in with my parents (I'm only 19 and they are hoping I will move back home for support) so they can support me financially and emotionally. I love this boy with all my heart and couldn't imagine life with out him. But I've become so dependant on him, when he's not here I'm alone and really bad thoughts take over and I throw up and have panic attacks. He would never leave me alone he loves me so much and only wants what's best for me. But I'm think maybe I should leave the relationship until I'm able to stand for myself again. Let him go out to the parties (so he only needs to support himself) until I'm able to give him my best and be a better girlfriend for him. i would appreciate thoughts on this I'm at a very sad crossroads and I only want this feeling of hopelessness to end so he can be proud to call me his girlfriend.

Mmack How do I tell my friends?
  • replies: 4

Hello, I have been battling depression for the last 3 years and have recently opened up to my Mum about how I am feeling..She is supportive and has encouraged me to talk to someone, whether it is a counsellor or close friend. I know that I don't talk... View more

Hello, I have been battling depression for the last 3 years and have recently opened up to my Mum about how I am feeling..She is supportive and has encouraged me to talk to someone, whether it is a counsellor or close friend. I know that I don't talk to my friends about the deep feelings and challenges I'm having but I really need to and I want to talk to them about it...but I don't know how to initiate it? if I start I'll probably just burst out in tears. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you. I need to increase my support base, I know its there if I reach out but I just can't get myself to do it.

Erin1010101 Depression is impacting my school work
  • replies: 3

I feel constantly depressed and it's impacting on my school work. I have already failed two subjects and I'm in year 12. Is there a way I can resist these exams?

I feel constantly depressed and it's impacting on my school work. I have already failed two subjects and I'm in year 12. Is there a way I can resist these exams?

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