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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Meh_ Struggling with friends.
  • replies: 5

I was sexually assaulted by my friend’s brother while I was sleeping at her house. After I had told her about it all my other friends started to slowly stop talking to me. I feel so lonely at school and I don’t know what to do because I have to see “... View more

I was sexually assaulted by my friend’s brother while I was sleeping at her house. After I had told her about it all my other friends started to slowly stop talking to me. I feel so lonely at school and I don’t know what to do because I have to see “him” everyday. I am also struggling with getting along with my parents (I only see my dad every two weeks). I get called a lazy b$&!h by my mum, my stepdad makes me feel like getting upset is wrong and stupid (he always makes sly comments or gets angry whenever anyone shows any sort of sad or angry emotion) and then my dad calls me a selfish, useless, lazy cow on a regular basis. I also have my little sister and my two younger stepbrothers with which I consistently get frustrated with. I feel so lonely within my own home and at school. I went through a period of time where I went to go get help for my mental wellbeing (this was before the assault) and my mum told me that she didn’t think I needed it so I stopped. My mental health has gotten to the point where I am turning to self harm. I don’t know what to do because I want help but I’m not any good at telling people in person how I am feeling and I always freeze when asked. Is there a way for me to find support without having to chat on the phone or in person?

paiigeisgone Study Tips And Tricks!
  • replies: 2

(And yes, I realize that one of the pinned forum note things is one of these but I'm going to include a few more!) 1. Have an organised work space! Wherever you study space may be (your desk, the dining table, a cafe, the library, etc.), you should a... View more

(And yes, I realize that one of the pinned forum note things is one of these but I'm going to include a few more!) 1. Have an organised work space! Wherever you study space may be (your desk, the dining table, a cafe, the library, etc.), you should always try to have it at least somewhat clean. I recommend taking a couple of minutes to put whatever is on your desk (or wherever your work space is) away or on the floor, and only what you need on your desk (pencil case, books, snacks, etc.) 2. Try not to leave things to the last minute! A.K.A. procrastination. It's something almost all of as do (including me... i have 2 assignments due tomorrow as i write this). FIND OUT THE EXAM/ DUE DATE!! It's key you know when it is so you can plan out when you can revise and when you can't. I recommend buying a planner/diary, setting tons of reminders on your phone/computer or writing little notes to yourself around the house where you'll see them to remind yourself (whiteboard markers are really good on mirrors!). Also, if your really lazy like me, I tend to write loads of things in my planner so it forces me to check it more often because I start worrying about what's due. 3. Get everything you need before revising/studying! If you're like me, you try to avoid studying. This means going back and forth to every possible place in the house, looking for things that'll "supposedly" help my revise. You should try to gather everything you need before your studying session starts! Bring a bottle of water, some snacks (preferably fruit or something without sugar) and all your equipment. Making multiple trips around the house and trying to avoid studying can distract you and you won't be as focused or on-task as you can be. You should also go to the bathroom before you begin studying. 4. Be in a space that is comfortable and suitable to your needs! I didn't really know how to word that properly but what i was trying to get at is be in a work space that you will focus in! If you like the sound of people having conversations over a cuppa and the smell of coffee and cake, then your local coffee shop is an ideal place for studying for you my friend! If you love quiet, air-conditioned places filled with other students, then try the your local library! Or maybe you just want to sit at home with earbuds in your ears, reading over your notes. The sky's the limit!

Dee_xx Work stress , uni stress , life stress
  • replies: 1

Hi there, It is my first time posting a thread on BB and I'm quite nervous to say the least. Lately I have found the stress of life has been interfering with what is meant to be the happiest years of my life. I'm 21 and soon to be engaged to a wonder... View more

Hi there, It is my first time posting a thread on BB and I'm quite nervous to say the least. Lately I have found the stress of life has been interfering with what is meant to be the happiest years of my life. I'm 21 and soon to be engaged to a wonderful man , however I don't feel as if I am confident enough. I feel I am inadequate as I have just started a new degree which I won't finish for another 3+ years , work is going down hill as I have a new manager in charge and I feel as if all eyes are on me ( I work in retail ) I am contemplating leaving my job because it makes me seriously unhappy however I need the money to prep for what's coming in the future . Everyone reminds me to enjoy these years and time with my soon to be fiancé before things get really serious but I just don't know how to if I feel so behind in regards to money, study and work . I often find myself tearing up at work and having to put a brave face which kills me as I just want time to be down and not have to worry about anything for once . I understand that my situation seems so ridiculous compared to what others are going through but maybe I am the type of person who can't handle things as well as others my boyfriend is very supportive however he is also 21 and I don't want to put him under any unecessary pressure as he is going rather well in his career and also has his ups and downs which I don't want to contribute to making him feel worse I am also awaiting response from into to determine if I can study full time as I am currently paying for my units up front due to that being my only option for entry ( marks were low ) so the stress of money and time wasted is also lingering over me in that sense . Sorry for the long thread !

Kitkatkaty Bullyed, felling alone, school tests
  • replies: 2

Everyday I go to school and I get called shorty and all these words, yea I do ignore it but it really does hurt. I feel like my friends arnt there for me. when I'm upset no one askes if I'm ok or do I need any help. I cry myself to sleep every night ... View more

Everyday I go to school and I get called shorty and all these words, yea I do ignore it but it really does hurt. I feel like my friends arnt there for me. when I'm upset no one askes if I'm ok or do I need any help. I cry myself to sleep every night and I never have a chance to talk to my mum cause she is always at work or sleeping. I don't like talking to my dad cause he just doesn't understand what is happening. I see a councler at school but she isn't helpful at all I dont know what to do, I don't know what friends I have left rn

Tacos I feel so alone even though i know that i'm not
  • replies: 6

Hi there, I have this problem where i have the most amazing friends and the most wonderful best friend i could ever hope to have, but i have never felt so alone and exhausted before. I know that i have these people around me but i still can't help bu... View more

Hi there, I have this problem where i have the most amazing friends and the most wonderful best friend i could ever hope to have, but i have never felt so alone and exhausted before. I know that i have these people around me but i still can't help but just feel outside the box and alone in the shadows. I'm in my VCE at the moment and exams start in about a week and i need help or advice, i havent been diagnosed with any sort of illness, just in case you were curious about that. I appreciate you reading and helping.

lyingcat I’m so lonely it hurts
  • replies: 5

I have no friends. At all. I stopped talking to my only friend about a month ago because of issues we had. We haven’t been close for a while before that though. So now I have no one to talk to. I go to work and that’s literally the only social intera... View more

I have no friends. At all. I stopped talking to my only friend about a month ago because of issues we had. We haven’t been close for a while before that though. So now I have no one to talk to. I go to work and that’s literally the only social interaction I get (outside of my household). It makes me feel really down and I have no idea what to do. Also I used to talk to this guy I had a crush on (like nearly 3 years ago) and he ghosted me. Now I keep thinking about it and it makes me feel crap. I know that’s random but I just get caught thinking how he would be a good friend. Plus I’d never had a crush before (even though I’m 21) or since. I tried a BJJ class last night and it was fun but I just keep thinking that I’m going to be alone, platonically and romantically. I think I’d really like to talk to someone about my loneliness and low self esteem but I’m not sure where to go? Is that a legitimate thing to talk about and to get help with? I went to Headspace 4 years ago for another reason and they won’t give me any more sessions. I went to a GP about it months ago and they referred me but I didn’t feel like they were really listening to me so I didn’t go. I feel so much shame and embarrassment that I’m so sad I have no friends. It feels so embarrassing to talk about, every time I think about it I just want to cry. It actually feels physically painful sometimes.

Hc2018 Asking for advice on how to deal with how I feel at the moment.
  • replies: 3

Hello, this is my first time posting anything along these lines despite having felt off for a while now. I'm a male, year 12 student currently completing the HSC and am finding it extremely hard to get motivated, both for my schoolwork and life in ge... View more

Hello, this is my first time posting anything along these lines despite having felt off for a while now. I'm a male, year 12 student currently completing the HSC and am finding it extremely hard to get motivated, both for my schoolwork and life in general. I am a sporty, popular teen that lacks for nothing friendship wise or financially. However, I have found that I am not particularly enjoying life but rather feel as if I'm within this constant grind that never ends. Sometimes I wonder if this is just a natural feeling that most school students experience but sometimes, like now, I feel so worn out and sick of my reality and crave some form of escape. Smoking Marijuana used to be just a social thing for me, having tried it the first time almost 2 years ago. However, the last couple of months it has turned into a way to alleviate stress as well as give me a temporary escape; my problems are that little bit further away and can be put off until the last second (or night before). I know and recognize that this is a problem and the last couple of weeks have done my best to keep it to a weekend thing to do with mates, rather than the daily (weekends, schoolnights etc.) habit it was becoming. I don't believe I am addicted to weed itself, but rather find it is the only way I know how to get away from it all. As of this point in my life I'm decided on the general area I would like to seek a career in, and even have a university/course that I am aiming for. My grades, while having slipped from previous standards, are still relatively high and not beyond redemption. Yet still I find myself sitting in this rut, not putting my all into school or really anything in life at the moment. My free time when not out with mates on a Friday/Saturday night involves simply lying in bed watching dumb Youtube videos for hours on end, watching as the time ticks by yet still I get up and do nothing more productive. When I'm high nothing changes, apart from the fact this routine becomes enjoyable. It it just laziness? Have I just become a classic stoner who has nothing to achieve? Sometimes I wonder these thoughts and am unsure whether they are true or if I am actually facing a serious problem. The whole purpose of my post is to gauge whether or not I should seek professional help with my current state of mind. Although I fight a lot with my parents and they are fairly intense, they still support and love me 100% and I am not worried about asking to see someone.

axkc Doing Well in Life... does loneliness matter?
  • replies: 2

I’m often questioning why I feel so worthless. I get consistent As and A+s in school, I am fairly good at sport, and money is no issue. The only problem is, these things seem to isolate me. I’m sure a large number of you are struggling with stress an... View more

I’m often questioning why I feel so worthless. I get consistent As and A+s in school, I am fairly good at sport, and money is no issue. The only problem is, these things seem to isolate me. I’m sure a large number of you are struggling with stress and anxiety due to school work, but as I am able to learn things quickly and manage my projects and assignments, I find it difficult to connect with those in my school. My friends, or rather the people I hang out with often scorn me, feel jealous, when I say that I got 100% on the last maths test. I know I shouldn’t be hanging out with people who make me feel bad about myself, but at the moment there is no one I can turn to, my school is small, and I don’t go online very often, so I am unlike introverts who spill their heart on the internet. I love my teachers; there’s no doubting that, but they have to care for so many of their students, students that are struggling, unlike me. I know that in a world ruled by social media that it is easy to fall into the trap of hiding feelings, but I don’t want that for myself. I want to find someone I am comfortable with. I have my motivation to learn, but I don’t have the drive to continue living like this. I would seek solace in my family, but it’s hard for me because I am not close with them, and my twin is constantly critical of my personality. I always end up feeling really bad about myself, but I can’t say anything because she has self esteem issues. I dream of the care of a friend, but am plagued by the feelings of worthlessness, invisibility and ungratefulness for the things I do have.

LUCIDFOX_X Mother
  • replies: 2

Okay, so... I am turning 21 in June. I was bullied from Kindergarten on and off (quite badly) until I left school at the end of year 10. When I got bullied mother never got over it and has never been able to let it go because it's completely consumed... View more

Okay, so... I am turning 21 in June. I was bullied from Kindergarten on and off (quite badly) until I left school at the end of year 10. When I got bullied mother never got over it and has never been able to let it go because it's completely consumed her. She's a different person. Unfortunately I don't remember what she was like before this. I was too young. (For it to make a bit more sense, she was bullied when she was younger and I don't think she ever really recovered from hers either). I managed to get past mine, quite well. I think it's something that will always sort of be there but it really doesn't have any power over me. So, for as long as I can remember, my mother has blackmailed me, threatened me, pushed me around, made me feel inadequate, told me that every part of me basically isn't good enough. And during that time, she would go onto my Facebook behind my back, talk to people for me (To make friends?), she even broke up with a guy I was seeing once. I found out about a month ago that she was going on my Facebook while I was in the shower and reading my messages. Over the past few years she has broken up important friendships, broken up relationships, caused me a lot of paranoia and anxiety, messaged my friends (and highly likely people who used to bully me) accusing them and their parents of still bullying me, harassing them. Causing me, again, anxiety and paranoia. I really don't know what to do. Because it is starting to affect almost every aspect of my life and I really have no control over the situation. I've taken a further step forward to turn to Legal Aid and get some legal advice because what is happening is considered to be slander and defamation. I should also add that I have been trying to stop her from doing all of this for about 6 years. I have tried almost everything. Aside from my last resorts which are both equally difficult decisions. Almost all of our family and friends have tried to stop her as well.

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