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Sophie_M Meet your community champions!
  • replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Be... View more

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

Aaronsis HELP..Am I posting in the right section?
  • replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried th... View more

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Becccak95 depression
  • replies: 2

I'm seeking a little bit of help, I'm suffering from depression, I have a almost 2 year old daughter, me and her father Are taking break , so I can get the help I need for my depression, I feel lost, confused and don't know what to do?

I'm seeking a little bit of help, I'm suffering from depression, I have a almost 2 year old daughter, me and her father Are taking break , so I can get the help I need for my depression, I feel lost, confused and don't know what to do?

Sawney Fight or flight response?
  • replies: 2

Ok here goes... Last year was not great. I lost my grandfather unexpectedly during my first week of semester. On April fools day I lost my cat Darcy who was kind of like my child. Then 12 days later I had to put down my childhood pet and best friend ... View more

Ok here goes... Last year was not great. I lost my grandfather unexpectedly during my first week of semester. On April fools day I lost my cat Darcy who was kind of like my child. Then 12 days later I had to put down my childhood pet and best friend of 10 years, Tillie, due to cancer. I know it is silly to feel this much for pets but I didn't eat properly for weeks. I didn't sleep. When I did sleep, it was often broken and I would wake up with the shakes. The shaking was especially bad if I woke up suddenly. I was angry for a long time and named it 'my dark place'. I also have had horrendous digestive issues that have only added to my anxiety. My Mum brought home two kittens and I was determined they weren't going outside. I didn't want to find them by the side of the road one morning. One of them got out one night and I was a nervous wreck. I didn't sleep. When we found her, I wept in my mum's arms for a long because I thought I'd lost her. I didn't want to be alone again I've fiercely protective of my pets. I know people may get angry for comparing children to pets but my pets are like my fur babies and I'm totally ok with it. One of the cats had a dirty butt and Mum was trying to clean it. I was going over to help. I thought she was hurting him and kept asking (and yelled) for her to let him go. I thought she was hurting him. I'm not sure what happen after that exactly. I thought I just moved to try and grab him. But all I recall is her storming off yelling to "never raise your hand to me again". I don't remember hitting her or pushing her. I just thought he was hurt and I had to get him away from the threat. I just didn't want him to be in pain. The language my family has used 'strike', 'raise your hand', ' scares me. I would never hurt anyone and I'm scared that I don't remember. I probably ruined the relationship with my Mum. I don't want to be at home because I don't want them near me. Why would they want to be near me? I can't even stand me. I have nothing to say because there are no words. What do I say? Sorry will never be enough. I don't know who I am anymore.

Ton Personal love issues
  • replies: 1

G'day, I am just going to throw it out there i have been married for 26 years and am only 46 years old and young at heart. I use to struggle to keep up with my wife sexually, but then she cheated on me then me on her some 7 years ago once only and bo... View more

G'day, I am just going to throw it out there i have been married for 26 years and am only 46 years old and young at heart. I use to struggle to keep up with my wife sexually, but then she cheated on me then me on her some 7 years ago once only and both came true. However the last few years she shows little intimacy while I have tried ot persisted to get responses. The rejection has eventually started to ware me Down, I know treat her the same as she treats me. Due to the years of rejection etc I am struggling or even finding it impossible to re-ignite her interest in me. I am thinking this is not healthy, I have started drinking and smoking to much and I wonder if it is just better to end it? Really don't want to

Leash01 New to this and new support
  • replies: 9

Hi everyone new to this, after some help and support of people dealing with anxiety and depression. I have times through the month that I really struggle with everything and feeling very low. I am married, two kids and working full time. I believe it... View more

Hi everyone new to this, after some help and support of people dealing with anxiety and depression. I have times through the month that I really struggle with everything and feeling very low. I am married, two kids and working full time. I believe it’s a lot of over thinking of things and I had a pretty turomatic childhood. Currently also seeing a great councillor.

AnnonE I’m just tired of being tired
  • replies: 2

I recently got a new house, new job, amazing boyfriend you would think I would be the happiest person but instead I’m having these awful days more and more now i just cry and cry, I take it out on my partner who does nothing but try look after me I f... View more

I recently got a new house, new job, amazing boyfriend you would think I would be the happiest person but instead I’m having these awful days more and more now i just cry and cry, I take it out on my partner who does nothing but try look after me I feel worthless, I don’t want to look in the mirror ever anymore because I hate everything that I see even though I’m continuously losing weight, I haven’t had sex in weeks because I don’t want to get undressed and I feel disgusting and have no want to I am always so exhustaed and just want bed, even though I already sleep 9 hours a night I can’t talk to anyone because I’ve never been able to communicate verbally ever about any of my problems no matter how much I’m struggling I can’t I don’t have many friends anymore and the few I do I just can’t ever find the energy or want to see them I get home from work and just want to be alone and not near my boyfriend which kills me because what kind of a girlfriend would rather be alone then with the one she loves. i don’t want to be sad anymore. i want to be who I once was. “I want my Happy e back” my boyfriend says it makes me cry even more because I don’t know where she has gone

sleepdeprived New & Struggling
  • replies: 9

Hi and thank-you for having me here. Over the last 3-4 months my wife and I have been having problems, we've never really been able to communicate effectively and have often crossed messages. We have been together almost 13 years and married for 5.5.... View more

Hi and thank-you for having me here. Over the last 3-4 months my wife and I have been having problems, we've never really been able to communicate effectively and have often crossed messages. We have been together almost 13 years and married for 5.5. She admitted she went down a road over the last few months she wasn't aware she was going down. We have become more distant, most likely as a result of my work as I am essentially a self-employed FIFO. She gave me a very small opportunity to make a change and choose her that I missed,whilst at the same time not listening to what I needed. I was the constant voice of expressing my love and affection, but also the voice that at the time I couldn't remove myself from the situation of being a FIFO for financial reasons for us. I didn't and don't enjoy it, being the unhappiest and unhealthiest I have ever been, but I was prepared to sacrifice for us. We also purchased a business 6 months ago which was our dream, me being the sole operator and she having her own profession. She requested space, so I have moved out on Saturday, but now she tells me it is a separation leading to divorce. I didn't stand a chance, she wouldn't communicate with me nor entertain couples counselling. She maintains to live where we were, with very little change to her life (she has become used to being alone with my work & she assures me there is no one else in the picture), with our limited support network as we moved from interstate. My support network is extremely limited as I haven't had a chance to find a group of friends due to constant travel, have to deal with 2 businesses in different states. I am extremely lost, emotionally, my anxiety is peaking like it never has before. I feel ashamed that I couldn't make my marriage work, that I will become a statistic. I feel rejected, worthless, lost. As this is only a few days old the pain is extremely real and fresh. I feel I don't belong anywhere and have no home, as my wife was the beacon I always was heading for. My wife has said there is no chance of reconciliation. I saw the psych yesterday who basically said it was over and to move on. I can't accept that and have been distraught. I am worthy of love, and our relationship is worth fighting for. Do I give her space and try to move forward and establish a 'new' relationship in the future. We to now for me? Exhausted and not sleeping and eating very little. Great family support but 1000's kms away. Possibly will see a GP SleepDeprived

notsohappyanymore just no my usual happy bloke
  • replies: 4

Hi all, its been a long time build up i suspect, never would I have thought that one day it would all seem like it is piling up on me. So, i am a 36yo husband and dad with two kids, one boy 5, one bubba girl just turned 1. I work in a professional ro... View more

Hi all, its been a long time build up i suspect, never would I have thought that one day it would all seem like it is piling up on me. So, i am a 36yo husband and dad with two kids, one boy 5, one bubba girl just turned 1. I work in a professional role in the transport industry, i dont work massive hours, i wouldnt say my job is stressful, it has its days, but nowhere what it used to be in my younger years in my career. I have been married since 2010 and with my wife since 2005-2006. Mum died of a terminal illness in April this year which shattered by dads and our familys life and ive certainly had better days. I am a big fan of camping and 4x4s, and long to spend money on my ute, but never get around to being able to budget for even the little things. Last night driving home from grabbing takeway in readiness to watch the state of origin, i suddenly broke down, and it was from one simple thought. It seems like nothing can make me happy anymore. BOOM, it cut through me harder than when Mum died. Even though my boy rode his bike without training wheels over the weekend and had his first big stack, my daughter crawling, saying Dadda, or my wife mentioning we should do a beach trip. Ive had drams with my wife over the years, i snap more frequently, i have a low tolerance level to naughty behaviour by my son, i feel like debts are overcoming me, i feel i drift around most days without concentrating 100% of the time. It just feels like there is just a need to wake up, live and go to sleep, with little details or excitement. I get severe back and neck pains for no reason now and then, i lack motivation because i am driven by money or the lack thereof to actually do nice things. I dont want to overload my dad as he is dealing with his own emotions and counselling after mum died, and my wife has her own anxiety matters she is dealing with, it just seems there is no reason but other than to basically exist. I have lost interest in my work, i am constantly on seek looking for jobs and i struggle to stay on point what i need to get done . But some days i can really motivate. I seem to be addicted to social media wanting what others have that i dont, i watch hours of you tube before bed, i am envious of the life that was before family life, which really guts me to say and think that. Do i sound like a prime candidate for help?? It makes me laugh to think i am the one who is normally the strong and optimistic type, but it just feels i am stuck in reverse gear. #lifesux

Chris_B Planned website outage: Thursday 28 June 1am-5:30am AEST (tomorrow)
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, As above in the title, the beyondblue website is undergoing maintenance tomorrow morning between 1am and 5:30am. During that period, the forums will be offline and unavailable for posting or reading. Our support service phone line is ope... View more

Hi everyone, As above in the title, the beyondblue website is undergoing maintenance tomorrow morning between 1am and 5:30am. During that period, the forums will be offline and unavailable for posting or reading. Our support service phone line is open 24 hours on 1300 22 4636 if you would like to speak with a professional counsellor while the forums are offline. Thanks for your patience.

Bertabee I am new too....
  • replies: 7

Hi Everyone, I am new to the forums but not so new to the depression anxiety battle. I have had anxiety for most of my adult life and have been managing ok with intermittent support and using a variety of tools. My teenage daughter was diagnosed earl... View more

Hi Everyone, I am new to the forums but not so new to the depression anxiety battle. I have had anxiety for most of my adult life and have been managing ok with intermittent support and using a variety of tools. My teenage daughter was diagnosed early last year with depression and was put on medication immediately, but it took a good 9 months and a few changes for her to get well, as well as a few difficult experiences with psychologist. We finally settled with an amazing psychiatrist and she is doing well - but now I am not doing very well. I have had really negative thoughts about myself and my life and I am angry I am not coping, and I know I should go and see someone but after meeting many psychologists who were not helpful to my daughter, I am really scared of going to see someone who might make this all worse for me, as I don’t have the energy to fight for what I need right now, or worse make me feel that I am just lazy or being dramatic. I am now at a point where it is becoming really necessary for me to see someone and the more I need it the more scared I become? I wonder if anyone here has had a similar experience with lack of trust for psychologists and how you got through it?? thanks guys

Scout28 Is any of this familiar to anyone out there?
  • replies: 6

Hi there I am new here. I jumped online because after 25 years of being on different medications for anxiety and depression I have tapered off and been off meds for just on a month. The reason was that the side effects were outweighing the benefits. ... View more

Hi there I am new here. I jumped online because after 25 years of being on different medications for anxiety and depression I have tapered off and been off meds for just on a month. The reason was that the side effects were outweighing the benefits. I had problematic gastrointestinal problems and regular headaches. After numerous tests and medication trials for both of those issues (over several years) it was time to see what coming off things would do. While I have managed to stayed off the meds and taken vitamins recommended by my GP and chemist to support me through SSRI withdrawal, I am an emotional wreck. I feel the anxiety, hopelessness and embarrassment at being me and huge swings involving regret over recent conversations and reactions and then there is a tsunami of emotion that just results in gasping and floods of tears. I am ready to quit my job (which I never really loved but which was ok for now) and drop out of a course I am nearly finished (I have pretty much dislike it all along but was just going to get it over with). I just can't stand the feeling of guilt that I am not doing more, not working overtime (like others), not studying enough. The feeling abates for a short time when I am engaged in the activity but so much of what I do seems incredibly difficult and I feel like I don't know what I am doing and I end up just throwing in the towel because despite working or studying for hours I am just not getting anywhere. I just want the pressure off but I can't work out what I should do instead. I have spent years and thousands of dollars on medication and psychologists and psychiatrists. I have done yoga and am even taking art classes as a way to have another outlet but its become one more thing I don't want to go to. While I don't want people to be suffering, at this stage I am really trying to reach out to see if this makes sense to anyone else. I am happily married and have friends and they are all supportive but I know that they haven't travelled the same path as me by their own admission. They sit with me why I cry suddenly but they admit they don't know how it feels. I am Gen X, no kids, spent most of my 20's and some of my 30's at uni and don't have the job to show for it. I have worked in call centres 20 years. I have turned 40 and I cannot get motivated or excited about anything in the future anymore and yes I know I am lucky for everything I do have. I just want to feel positive and excited about life and stay off meds.