Welcome and Orientation

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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Newbie!!

replies: 6

Hi everyone!! I’m Ell and this is my first ever post on a beyondblue forum =). I'm a 24 year old female and love the beach, holidays, basketball and just spending time with my partner, friends and family. I'm similar to LavenderTea who you might have seen around the forums over the last little while. I'm also studying a masters of psychology, only mine will take a little longer and as I'll be specialising in developmental and educational psychology!! I'm also about to start my phD, so looks like I'm going to be one of those people at uni foreverrrrrr!! (not really I hope). I'm super excited to get out there eventually and start helping people! For now though, I'm just really keen to have a play on these threads and see if I can offer any advice to anyone that might need a little extra help =). I'll be around on Wednesday mornings. Hopefully I get to know you all soon, E x

Sparklemuffin85, your friendly neighbourhood Peacock Spider is here

replies: 1

Hi guys, My name is Sparklemuffin85. I know it must be really hard to contain your squeeeee of adorbs when you see my name. I'm named after very pretty species of Peacock spiders found in Australia. If you haven't yet, please check out their dance moves on youtube. Now that we have the important stuff out of the way, I will get into the technical things. I have been looking for a place or outlet where I can be amongst people who understand me. Looks like I'm at the right place. Why I'm here, you ask? I have been having suffering from uncontrollable anxiety with frequent panic attacks ( in private), dark and self-abusive thoughts for months and months ( I can't remember when it all started). Finally i decided i can't live my life like this. I believe I have been suffering from depression too, most likely for several years now ( though I'm not sure whether i've always had these problems). I have signed up for the "Mental Health care plan" and have seen a therapist three times so far. She has been nice and helpful. She has given me tips to sort my life into a coherence with SMART goals, positive thinking and avoid self- abusing language. I have made a few improvement in my lifestyle, and have been getting much better sleep due to regular exercise and healthy-ish diet. However, i noticed after a while, the momentum is hard to keep going. Any minor inconvenience can set me off my anxiety and I cannot rest. I have a couple of friends i can chat to about my problems, but most of the time i feel really awkward to suddenly send a message like, I feel bad today. I need somewhere I can talk and be heard and not feel guilty about wasting other's times. I am hoping i made the right decision of opening up here. Please take care of me. Regards Sparklemuffin85

Hi

replies: 5

Hi everyone. New here. I am at a dead end with my mental health. I feel that the panic attacks and anxiety are controlling and ruining my life and I am out of ways to control it. Anyway just wanted to say hi and am hoping that joining beyond blue can... View more

Husband has ptsd and anxiety and I don't know what to do

replies: 3

I'm scared for my husband. He has been diagnosed with anxiety and ptsd. He is on meds for the anxiety but his ptsd has been triggered pretty badly over the last couple of years due to a bad workplace that he has now left and the death of pets which relates to the initial cause of his ptsd. Last time he saw the doctor he sees for mental health they diagnosed the ptsd. The dr referred him on to a psychiatrist that he never wound up seeing. The story as to why has expanded and seems to have changed over time. I see a psychologist as I suffer anxiety myself. I was worried as his drinking had greatly increased over time and his behaviour had changed. He was snapping at me in a way that felt nasty and having panic attacks more often. I discussed my options with my therapist as my anxiety was spiking badly in response and one of the options was relationship therapy(RT). I had started avoiding talking to him about things that were important to me as I knew it would upset him. I talked to my husband about it which blindsided him as he thought everything was perfect and we were both perfectly happy. We discussed our options and talked about things we could do to work together on this. Even though things were perfect he had things that he had issues with me about that we could work on. Because if that I agreed to let the RT go for a bit. Forward to about 2-3 months later and out of nowhere he starts talking about it and how it has shattered his confidence. He starts blaming my therapist again for me asking for us to see someone culminating in him angrily calling her a vicious person. He kept pushing me to tell him exactly what I told her that led to the decision. Blaming her and insisting that people only go to RT if there is abuse. I tried to argue back that it's not true but he argued that he knows better from his work. He started going off about how it was a message from my therapist to him and pushed me really hard to take a message back from him to her. He also said that I must have said some really negative things about him to her and that he would never say negative things about me to someone else as that would be disloyal. When I questioned if that made me disloyal he insisted no it didn't and that I could talk to my therapist about him in the future but if I did he wanted me to tell him what I said after. I now feel I can't talk to anyone about him as I feel like I have to go home and tell him after. I could honestly go on for another 2500 chars.

Struggling big time

replies: 4

I am a new member. Life is hard at the moment. I have been diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I’m medicated for these. I’m not sleeping well at all. I continually feel like there is someone sitting on my chest. My heart races. I am exhausted all the time. I work full time. I’m a single mum. I have two children. So I need to do more than bare minimum unfortunately. I’ve managed to put things into place so that we’re having healthy meals most of the time. I do fall into chocolate, binge eating etc for comfort. I’m waiting to speak to a psychologist. I really hate being so ‘useless’, as I’m generally a high achieving person. So it kills me that I am struggling to do even the basics of things like have a shower. I’m trying to have basic goals - things like brushing my teeth, having a shower, taking my tablets. But it seems like normal is SO far away!

Hi! Hope I’m Welcomed!

replies: 2

I needed a place to just blab and say my thoughts aloud. I am in my early 20’s and i bet people would be like ah thats the age when you think everything is hard and hopeless. Thats what i always tell myself and i say to myself there are others who are suffering far worse than i am and has got less than what i have so i don’t deserve to be sad and depressed... i say this to myself over and over again and thought this would give me strength and keep me strong. I was wrong, this made me so much more lonelier and sad. I try to do something and i know that everything cant work the way i want it to.. and i know even if i do my best and give my love to someone it depends on how they receive it and see me. But no matter how hard i try, it doesn’t seem like my thoughts are reaching anyone. I just need someone to not even completely understand me but just to hear me out. People say i always smile and look like someone who has nothing to worry but thats just because i dont want anyone to worry or be bothered by me. I try to keep things to myself cause i hate to make trouble. I do whats best for others but am I doing something wrong? It comes back the opposite way all the time.. i feel like im not needed and sometimes all the trouble seems to be happening because of me. I feel like my friends, my boyfriend and family could have meet someone better than me. They could have been happier. I hate to put an excuse to something else because its my fault im feeling like this. I know it is.. but om the other hand, i could have atleast loved myself when i felt like the world was turning from me. I feel like i let myself down.. and everything is on me. These thoughts that’s repetitively comes to my mind and i dont want to live like this. I hate myself for hating myself and my life when i know i could make it better but i just feel like im loosing hope more and more. Thanks for reading. Really appreciate it.

alone forever?

replies: 4

I'm one of the most popular kids in my year I'm friends with everyone and can start a conversation with anyone yet somehow I always feel lonely no matter who I'm with and I feel as if a relationship is the only way for me to feel whole or not lonely but because i can't find someone to be in a relationship with coz no one will ever like me more then a friend I just end up feeling worthless and forever alone.

Hello

replies: 2

Not sure which section to post in. Finding my way around this site is one big confusion. Not the sites fault as this is how I am feeling at present. Confused, foggy, tired, mentally and physically exhausted, depressed, anxious the list goes on. im a 54 year old man. Diagnosed with depression over 30 years ago and recently rediagnosed with bipolar type 2, generalised anxiety disorder and BPD. For 30 years I’ve been seeking treatment and medicated but NOTHING ever seems to work. Does anyone ever feel so exhausted from trying to work on yourself and better yourself? Thanks for listening.

My life is a mess

replies: 6

Didnt know where else to post so im posting here... Im an international student here in vic...its been just over 6 months since i started living here. Im 19, and have never been away from my parents before, and man does that make me feel like a loser lol... yeah i thought i would be all right being all independent and shit but im just not... cant do a thing on my own.. i live with my elder sis currently but i feel like such a leech cz im not paying rent or anything, while my friends and other ppl frm uni are adulting so well despite some of them being a year younger than me..some of the other international students are really struggling while im just living so lavishly compared to them, i really feel like i should be suffering more. My grades are good so far (2HDs and 2Ds) but this accomplishment just seems like another expectation met since i had plenty of time to study. I cant find a job to save my sorry ass - i do live regionally where jobs are hard to come by but thats just another stupid excuse.. sorry for the long rant but yeah i have no idea how to stop feeling like a loser who cant do shit, not until i find a job and hopefully get permission to move out and live closer to uni and finally take control of my own life. Until then i gotta change my attitude and stop worrying so damn much but idk how...any and all help will be much appreciated.

A month of hell. Have I found my reason?

replies: 9

Thanks for reading. Over the last month I've had a crisis of self. I'm 37, married with an awesome wife, and 3 beautiful Kids. Sounds like a perfect life. It was. Now it's not. My wife has made some really good friends and has been working for the first time since having kids. Oldest is 11. So with extra income she has been going out to concerts and shows with her friends. As we live in regional Australia, the trips to concerts involve nights away. She has also been staying at her friends house on the occasional weeknight as she needs to talk over some issues relating to her past that I can't help her with. Sounds pretty normal, but I found myself having a problem with it. At first I was angry that she wanted to be away from me, then jealousy would hit me, why won't she just come home? I've been doing a lot of changes in my life and I have suddenly realised I'm lonely. I am friends of everyone but not good enough friends of anyone to be invited anywhere. I've never been a groomsman and only ever been to one bucks night, my brother in laws. It really hit me tonight when my wife was leaving to go to a girls night. I couldn't hide it, I just started crying. The stupid thing is, I actually want her to go and have a good time, at the same time I'm crying coz she's going! She is my best friend, my only true friend and I love her dearly. Now she has her new friends I feel left out and abandoned. There has been many other small things that have added to my bad feelings, like im no longer on her locked screen on her phone and she has changed here pin code to mention a couple. Does anyone else have these feelings or have had them? If so how did you get past them? Do I just need a mate? I really miss what we used to have.

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Newbie!! replies: 6

Sparklemuffin85, your friendly neighbourhood Peacock Spider is here replies: 1

Hi replies: 5

Husband has ptsd and anxiety and I don't know what to do replies: 3

Struggling big time replies: 4

Hi! Hope I’m Welcomed! replies: 2

alone forever? replies: 4

Hello replies: 2

My life is a mess replies: 6

A month of hell. Have I found my reason? replies: 9