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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Feeling unwanted

replies: 1

So.. first post. I feel like im not good enough for anyone. My last 2 ex boyfriends cheated on me. My current bf ive been with 8 months says he loves me and only wants me... But he doesnt initiate sex and i found him on a dating site looking for sex ... View more

Any advice on dating with mental health issues, particularly depression?

replies: 3

I'm a 19-year-old male with ASD, ADHD-C, ODD and severe depression for which I have just been prescribed a new anti-depressant (an SNRI). I'm waiting until I hit the 4-6-week mark to see some positive effects, but at the moment, I'm still terribly depressed. Here are some of the reasons I'm depressed, according to my psychologist: No job Not currently studying No intimate relationship No friends I don't eat or drink properly I don't exercise I have been longing for a romantic relationship for a while, but I'm hesitant to start dating. This might be my depression talking, but not only am I average looking, I am additionally a carrier of some pretty bad genes, which isn't particularly attractive. Plus, I don't know what girls will think of me or whether they'll even like me. Almost all the girls I've ever known have been very happy, girly -- you know, very neurotypical -- average IQ and it seems like they're only into tall and hot guys, and I'm neither. Point is, should I bother trying to find love if I'm at the bottom of the dominance hierarchy? Speaking in terms of biology and evolution, I'm not a very attractive mate. And if I do, should I tell them about my disorders or hide them? Maybe I'm feeling desperate because I don't know what it feels like to be loved by someone. Or to mean the world to them. Thoughts? Cheers.

Depression, Anxiety.. life in general

replies: 1

Hi, I've been struggling with depression since I was 22 now 34, On medication, thought I was doing ok for the last 2 year's So I lowered my dose recently and then relapsed and now back to my normal dose and I feel like I was 10 years ago. Angry at my partner all the time, do not want to socialise with her, family or friends. Feel like this life is far to complicated then it needs to be. I think the society is to blame and this image of having this family home with a white picket fence and everyone is trying fill this void with buying more and mo stuff, keeping up with the jones social media etc. The one thing I do love is my dogs and animals in general, they keep it so simple the way it should be. Sleep all day and always loving meanwhile we are trying to move through the daily grind while the government keep telling us we are free until we retire at 80 and enjoy the last few years in a retirement village shitting ourselves....

Rural and lonely, but hi! :)

replies: 2

Hi all, I am from rural SE SA. I moved down for work a couple of years ago, but am finding it hard to break into the community and the loneliness is getting up a bit. I am not very into sport, and will not go into team sports (I have given it a try but didn't enjoy it). I have tried to get into other community groups with limited success (either it folds or I am the youngest there by at least 20 years). For some context, I am a high school teacher who teaches photography and IT. I am mainly looking to reach out and see if there are any creative ways to break the loneliness that haven't been covered by the usual advice from online (get a hobby, join a group, get outside etc). Thanks

alone and frustrated

replies: 5

i get frustrated so easily lately. For example, I want to find something that should be right in front of me, and I can't find it. I get terribly upset because I want t now! I have tried cooking which I usually enjoy. Twice in 3 days I burned the pot and needed to throw out the food and scrub the pot. The smell of burn lingers in the whole house. I feel like I'm losing it.I feel extremely cold, and the heater doesn't help. I just want to go to sleep.

Can't stop thinking about it

replies: 2

Hey guys. I'm new to the forum. Been diagnosed with anxiety since I had a DVT episode 2 years ago. I don't cope well when I'm overwhelmed and lately I've been having a very bad time and I'm really looking for some impartial advice with my latest issue as I can't stop thinking about it and can't move on for worry. Yesterday one of my work colleagues was made redundant. There are 3 of us in the same role and I'm very close to one of them. It was well known that I didn't like the one who was made redundant. Just wasn't a team player and would leave the rest of us to do the work which unfortunately this week reached a peak and lead to numerous emotional outbursts for me. All done in private and unknown to my friends and colleagues. Anyway I had a chat to my other colleague about how overwhelmed we were both feeling by our workloads. Later that day we received the redundancy news. My immediate reaction was oh my god more work for us. I turned to my colleague who was in the meeting and exclaimed oh my god to her. It was perhaps a little ott but it has been perceived by others in the room as happiness at my colleagues redundancy. I feel so bad that my exclamation has been wrongly perceived and I worry that my subconscious self may have been happy about it because of how negative I've been feeling towards her. I've always received a telling off from my boss for being perceived as bitchy and I'm just not. I don't know how to move past this. I don't want my colleagues thinking I'm happy that she has gone. I'm happy for myself and my mental health but not for her and her situation. It feels so selfish but nobody knows what her presence and lack of team work does to me mentally. Does any of this make sense? Any advice for me? Thanks v much

Self conscious so staying home.

replies: 3

I am a young elderly lady feeling so very lonely. People have tried to be friends but I hide away, and they give up. Moved to a new state recently with a wonderful husband who works. I suffer from depression and anxiety, which seems well enough medicated for. I don't have any hobbies or particular skills. Have had much in the way of challenges in my life. Overweight and don't look good in anything I wear now, so I keep myself at home. Thinking people are looking at me and sometimes laughing. Have had a few cancers etc. Have had some suitable employments, requiring some reasonable intellect. Now, nothing but me.

Hello and 3 questions

replies: 1

Hi there. This is my first time posting. I had a few questions 1) Is there a place on here to discuss psychotic symptoms? 2) Is there a place on here to talk to other chronic sufferers? like 10 + years Thanks Q4

Really struggling at the moment

replies: 2

Hi. I'm a 37 year old guy who has had depression his whole life. I first started seeing mental health professionals when I was around 12 years of age, and I have seen more and more as my life has gone on. My current therapist thinks I may have had depression as early as age 2, which is kind of crazy, but here we are. I often go on good periods where things travel okay, and then I'll fall down a hole again, and have to lift myself up. I've had a number of these relapses over the years, and the thing is they get harder, not easier, to dig myself out of as I get older, because I get more and more evidence that things aren't ever going to change for me. I've been alone most of my life, apart from a toxic relationship of 2 years I was in, which ended very badly, with me suffering PTSD on top of everything else. It's coming on 10 years since that relationship ended and I haven't met anyone in that time that has shared a mutual interest or attraction in me. I've put on weight, lost my hair, and get older and uglier in that time, which has only made me more awkward and lacking in confidence. I've managed to work full time for 15 years despite my depression, and last year made the leap of faith to go to university to study psychology. I continue to work part-time in the industry I was working in, in a stressful job that requires shift work and weekend work, so I rarely socialise or have the energy or inkling to get out and enjoy life beyond working or studying. I am currently on university break and the time without the distraction of study has really messed me up. Some things have happened that triggered feelings and memories I've tried to bury, namely the feeling of having someone to share a life with. Coming up on ten years since I last was in a relationship, this has hit me very very hard. I feel so very alone, and don't see how things will get better in the future given the lack of interest I've gotten from women over the past 10 years, and the complete rejection I've experienced on dating sites and apps. I really want to pack it all in and get away from everything, but I have steep debts to pay and don't know how I'd pay them if I quit my job. I am leaning towards deferring uni, but I hate the idea of working my current job without studying, as it is an industry I am trying to get away from. I know if I want a relationship I need to accept myself and radiate confidence, but I just can't do it. I just don't like myself, and would love to be away from myself.

My husband has a drinking problem

replies: 4

My husband recently had a stroke and still has a blood clot blocking a major artery in his neck. He has been told that the clot could move anytime or be there for years. If it moves to his brain it could kill him. One of the things that he has been told is that he shouldn't drink anymore than 2 drinks in a session. He was a very heavy drinker prior to the stroke. Drinking 8-10 full strength beers a night. We spoke about this productively together and we discussed it with our doctor. The doctor suggested he go and see a drug and alcohol counsellor and I also suggested that it is very hard to reduce alcohol use on your own. He insisted however, that he could do it on his own. He didn't drink at all for a month (doctor's advice) and I was feeling confident that he could reduce his consumption. Also our life during this time was so good because he wasn't bad tempered (as alcohol makes him). He said he couldn't keep to 2 drinks a night so we negotiated together, that he have 3 drinks (this wasn't ideal but better than how much he drank before). Now though, he has gradually been increasing his intake. I have tried to talk to him about how this makes me feel (scared that something will happen to him and stressed) and also offer him support to go back to 3. I think he blames me for not being able to drink and thinks his life is ruined by it. We are fighting a lot and I feel unloved and uncared for because he doesn't care about the impact on me or the fact he could be throwing away our future. I am very sad.

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Feeling unwanted replies: 1

Any advice on dating with mental health issues, particularly depression? replies: 3

Depression, Anxiety.. life in general replies: 1

Rural and lonely, but hi! :) replies: 2

alone and frustrated replies: 5

Can't stop thinking about it replies: 2

Self conscious so staying home. replies: 3

Hello and 3 questions replies: 1

Really struggling at the moment replies: 2

My husband has a drinking problem replies: 4