Struggling to know how to speak to my psych
- replies: 2
Hi, I've been going through a pretty low stage for the past few months and have gotten used to this very low bar of mood. I've also just been very in my own head (more than normal) so have a few things I wanted to come to this forum to share and I wo... View more
Hi, I've been going through a pretty low stage for the past few months and have gotten used to this very low bar of mood. I've also just been very in my own head (more than normal) so have a few things I wanted to come to this forum to share and I would love any advice. I've been having some suicidal thoughts which I was speaking to my psychologist about. I've been feeling slightly better after about 3 weeks of these intense thoughts (I think?) but I'm just so confused where I'm at. I have a real issue with judging myself for feeling depressed or having suicidal thoughts, often thinking I am just trying to get attention when I open up about this. I have been having less of the really concerning/harmful thoughts but I am still incredibly low and never don't just want to disappear. I don't really know what the problem is or what I'm asking for advice on but I am just having trouble explaining where I am at to my psych because while I am still feeling incredibly low and hopeless, I am not feeling at risk so think I'm judging myself for complaining at all. I also don't know if I am actually doing enough to get out of this spot because sometimes I feel like I just want to sit in the low emotions and am not trying hard enough to feel better, but I feel too guilty/ashamed to admit that. Another thing I was hoping for advice on was talking about was how to speak about a fear of sex or intimacy with my psych. I have raised it once or twice so she knows about it briefly, but it is something I really, really want and feel I need to fix, or work through, as I feel so insecure in every part of my life because of it. I don't know how to raise it, or ask her to focus more of my sessions on it, because I feel so uncomfortable talking about it. Just for context, I am 26 and have literally done nothing remotely intimate with anyone because I am so uncomfortable. I know this is a lot and I am jumping around, but honestly any advice would be incredibly appreciated.