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Just_Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 703

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

Kazzl Helpful books and resources
  • replies: 103

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, sp... View more

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, specialist websites or blogs, podcasts, vodcasts or print or online journals or magazines. Please note BB has a list of websites and resources under Get Help, so maybe check there first for online resources. (Also note that we cannot include live links to online resources.) To make things easy to find, please put the category of the content first in bold, then the title of the book and then, if you want, a brief comment. Please note that anything listed here reflects the member's views only. Publications and other resources are not necessarily endorsed by beyondblue. Happy reading!

Chris_B Worried about other users - how are we all doing?
  • replies: 43

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences... View more

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences of others can be validating, because we feel 'we've been there', but sometimes it can also be a trigger for bringing up unpleasant feelings. I've started this thread so we can have a constructive discussion about helping others and helping ourselves - how do you cope when you read about others in distress? Do you have a self-care plan in place, and if so, what is it? Really looking forward to hearing from you all.

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quirkywords Talking to your inner critic, can it be tamed?
  • replies: 735

Do you have an inner critic ? Have you ever tried to talk to your inner critic. This is what happened when I tried. In my Be yourself thread people asked about how I interviewed my inner critic. So here it is. This is adapted from a writing exercise ... View more

Do you have an inner critic ? Have you ever tried to talk to your inner critic. This is what happened when I tried. In my Be yourself thread people asked about how I interviewed my inner critic. So here it is. This is adapted from a writing exercise to interview your inner critic about one's writing. As my inner critic has an opinion all aspects of my life I decided to broaden the scope of the interview. Me: I welcome (well I don't really) this opportunity to find out why you always need to have an opinion that is always negative about me and my life. IC: I thought this was going to be a friendly interchange of ideas but there you go with your anger and hostile remarks. I do not see myself as negative but as helping you, because you do need help. I am here to help you why can't you see that? Me: So when I am trying to sleep and you tell me about all my mistakes, embarrassing moments, how does that help me? IC: I thought while you are in bed you would have time to consider some of your past behaviours. This I feel will only help you to improve. Me: If you are so helpful why do I feel so worthless, so sad, so ignorant when you are around? Do you really know how low I can feel when you are constantly telling me all my faults? IC: You make yourself feel that way- I am merely pointing out the truth. It is not my problem that you are so weak. Me: Maybe this was a bad idea you are never going to listen to me or understand me. IC: Have you ever thought that maybe you shouldn't listen to me if I upset you so much. Me How can I ignore you when you are so loud at times. IC: See this is what I mean you are so weak. You have the power to ignore me, to silence me but all you do is whinge and complain. Me: I am ending this interview. Enough is enough. What would you say to your inner critic and what do you want to hear from your inner critic? Maybe you can have a go at interviewing your inner critic. Quirky

_goldfish_:o It comes and goes in waves
  • replies: 7

Hey, so I am a fairly new poster here but have been living with mental illness for a few years. One thing that I find really hard is that a lot of my symptoms seem to come and go quite drastically. One week I'll be on top of the world and the next I'... View more

Hey, so I am a fairly new poster here but have been living with mental illness for a few years. One thing that I find really hard is that a lot of my symptoms seem to come and go quite drastically. One week I'll be on top of the world and the next I'll be fighting off thoughts of SH. The 'hard periods' as I call them can last anywhere from a day to three months and don't happen at regular intervals either. I can also never identify anything that might trigger this when it happens. Does anyone else feel the same or have any advice? Or know why this happens? Or how to help/prevent it?(I'm open to suggestions and apologise if I have written anything wrong in this post)

alym20 walking it out
  • replies: 7

Hi all! One thing that instantly boosts my mood when feeling stressed or down is simply going for a walk.It can be challenging sometimes, especially in winter, to get myself out of my room but I know that as soon as I step outside for a walk I will r... View more

Hi all! One thing that instantly boosts my mood when feeling stressed or down is simply going for a walk.It can be challenging sometimes, especially in winter, to get myself out of my room but I know that as soon as I step outside for a walk I will return feeling better. Let me know if you enjoy walks too or have another favourite activity that makes you feel a little better!

ecomama Random Acts of Kindness during difficult times...
  • replies: 26

Hello everyone Today is a new day with new possibilities. Sometimes we feel so overwhelmed with our own issues and the crises around us that we may forget how powerful it can be for ourselves and others to say or do one kind thing... Kindness is love... View more

Hello everyone Today is a new day with new possibilities. Sometimes we feel so overwhelmed with our own issues and the crises around us that we may forget how powerful it can be for ourselves and others to say or do one kind thing... Kindness is love in action and our world is hurting. I've observed the change in people around me. Previous acts of kindness, were met with a smile and a thankyou but now... the reactions have changed. People are almost crying, saying thankyou with such relief. These responses hit me yesterday. I'm not a social worker but I do live and work in my community. I think about a kindness someone did for me all day, maybe for weeks and longer. When I do a simple thing for others I FEEL GOOD. We CAN make a difference. You can make a difference to someone today with a simple act, starting with yourself. Your actions can be planned but also taken on an impulse. A text asking how someone is doing? Or telling them you care about them. Offering to take an elderly person's trolley back to the bay or a parent's trolley back for them. Leaving a flower on a neighbour's letterbox. Asking the Supermarket worker how they're doing today. Thanking a Police Officer or Ambulance worker when you see them. Dropping a note into a person's letterbox when you know they live alone. Reacting with kindness. Kindness starts with being kind to ourselves. Please share a lovely thing you did for YOURSELF or somebody else. ANY THING is lovely to read about and can cheer a person up all day. Yesterday I saw a young mum struggling with her baby and shopping and trolley. The baby was crying. The empty trolley began to roll away. I stopped it and asked if I could take it back for her. She said "THANK YOU!" and said it four more times as I walked away and back. Then I saw her smiling and crying driving her car past me. She waved and I gave her a thumbs up. The darling girl, who knows what she's going through... Love to you today EM

quirkywords Does putting on weight affect your mental health?
  • replies: 14

I have been watching a program on sbs about What does Australia really think about obesity.? I was very moved that people who are overweight experience more mental health issues and depression that people who are not overweight. The program informed ... View more

I have been watching a program on sbs about What does Australia really think about obesity.? I was very moved that people who are overweight experience more mental health issues and depression that people who are not overweight. The program informed us that overweight people get negative comments every day and are subject to fat shaming when ever they go out in public. I wonder if you have ever experienced fat shaming or heard Brooke being shamed because of their weight. I worry that someone’s weight may be causing mental illness not due to the weight but how other people judge them. For much of my life I was over weight. In my first workplace my female colleagues told me I could get a boyfriend if only I lost weight and dressed better wore make up . I was told my thighs were too big to wear shorts. I have been called fat and lazy and complete strangers have given me advice. If you feel you can share how your weight makes you feel and any experience when you were shamed and judged for your weight. I am really interested to find out more about how mental health is affected by being overweight.

Jane363 Best word to describe today
  • replies: 754

Warmth the sunlight is warm on my back; people here are very warm, accepting and welcoming - far more so than many of my own friends and family - thank you so much, it has helped more than you will realise and has helped lead me to... and finally, my... View more

Warmth the sunlight is warm on my back; people here are very warm, accepting and welcoming - far more so than many of my own friends and family - thank you so much, it has helped more than you will realise and has helped lead me to... and finally, my self-attitude is warm and forgiving which is a huge change from the self hatred I have been pushing onto myself so much recently.

nib Happy.
  • replies: 4

"Happiness is a journey, not a destination." I can honestly say, that I am finally becoming more and more content with they way in which my life is panning out. I have been playing netball on and off for the past twenty years straight, and after bein... View more

"Happiness is a journey, not a destination." I can honestly say, that I am finally becoming more and more content with they way in which my life is panning out. I have been playing netball on and off for the past twenty years straight, and after being in this particular team for a year, I can, once again, honestly say, that this is my favourite and the best team I have ever played for. My best friend of twenty years (the friend that I was struggling to maintain a friendship with as we don't communicate often) scores for my team now, and once I service and renew registration for my car, we are going to plan a trip to Cairns (if anyone has been there - you have GOT to please give us some recommendations on what to do there!) We are going to fly there. I returned to adult school this year, after taking three years off due to experiencing poor mental health, and I am completely and utterly excelling at it! I will be completing Year 12 across two years, with next year being my last year at the school. I never moved in with the man I had a romantic interest in, and my relationship with my parents is improving. I have received a lot of counselling in regards to the man I had a romantic interest in, and I have come to the conclusion that he and his family were incredibly toxic to my mental health. My goals now include expanding my friendship circle, going back to volunteer, getting my certificate of education, and eventually getting paid work.

MWV The alcohol roundabout
  • replies: 29

I can't even remember how many times I feel like I've written this or felt like this. I have bipolar & long-time depression and anxiety. I'm finding it really hard to find purpose right now. I'm currently a stay at home dad and that isolation and som... View more

I can't even remember how many times I feel like I've written this or felt like this. I have bipolar & long-time depression and anxiety. I'm finding it really hard to find purpose right now. I'm currently a stay at home dad and that isolation and sometimes boredom leads me to the wine. Classic case of I have depression so I drink, and I'me depressed because I drink. But I would also binge drink when I wasn't a stay at home dad. I just use alcohol to dull my senses a bit. I know all of this is text book, but still wanted to put this out there to see what strategies other people have tried, and to know that I'm not the only one.... Thanks

Eagle Ray Getting a rescue dog?
  • replies: 14

I’ve found a rescue dog online I’m drawn to adopt? He is on the introverted side and quite scared of people, and they are looking for someone of a similar nature who will be gentle and understanding of him. Not long ago I saw an episode of The Dog Ho... View more

I’ve found a rescue dog online I’m drawn to adopt? He is on the introverted side and quite scared of people, and they are looking for someone of a similar nature who will be gentle and understanding of him. Not long ago I saw an episode of The Dog House where a guy with PTSD was looking to adopt a rescue dog. He was initially matched with a dog who had trauma like him but it didn’t work out. In the end they matched him with a young, happy non-traumatised dog and it really worked. What I’m a little worried about is my whole life I have been a carer for others who are traumatised, including caring for my mother from a young age. This has left me with my own trauma. I wonder if it would be better for me to adopt a less shut down and frightened dog. At the same time I feel I would understand him, be able to help him come out of his shell and help him feel safe, that the world is not a threat (even though I’m still learning this myself). It’s like I’m exhausted from a lifelong carer role and feel I have nothing left to give, and yet I love dogs and am drawn to this one. I’m confused Obviously no one else can make the decision for me, and I can travel to meet him at least. But I just wondered if anyone else here with a trauma history has adopted a dog before? Was it a rescue dog and how did it go? I didn’t grow up with dogs but have lived with others’ dogs several times as an adult. I’ve cared for housemates’ and landlords’ dogs for extended periods when they’ve been away. So I’m aware of the work involved but also loved them to bits and they’ve been an important part of my life. I have some chronic health issues so this one I’m considering at the moment might suit in that he’s not high energy and sounds like he’s happy to go on sedate walks. Anyway, just wondering if anyone has any thoughts or similar experiences?

Guest_1055 Positivity Words A - Z
  • replies: 3902

Hello, Sometimes it is really challenging to think positive. Especially when we are struggling with things or when circumstances in our lives seem difficult. So I thought this may help. Just think of a positive word. Words go from A to Z. Like one pe... View more

Hello, Sometimes it is really challenging to think positive. Especially when we are struggling with things or when circumstances in our lives seem difficult. So I thought this may help. Just think of a positive word. Words go from A to Z. Like one person says something starting with A the next person say something that is starting with B. And so on. All words must be positive, so no doom and gloom. Feel free to write the meaning of the positive word you choose if you want. Maybe that would help us all. Not sure how this will go....