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MsPurple LGBT+ members - got a question - need somewhere to start - here is the place
  • replies: 221

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations H... View more

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations Here you can ask questions about anything from questioning your sexuality/gender identity, coming out concerns, dating, mental health etc. If you are an ally (an Ally is a person who considers themselves a friend to the LGBTQ+ community) you are also welcome to come here to be a support to our community and ask questions as well. This is a supportive place for people to discuss their questions and concerns, we are not a place of judgement. As Thumper from the movie Bambi said "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all." If you are looking for a more social and light hearted conversation might I suggest joining us on the thread under BB social/rainbow cafe. Copy and paste the link: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/bb-social-zone/let's-chat-about-anything Feel free to introduce yourself below and ask any question/s I thought I'd answer one common question in the intro post and this is one I have heard a lot. What do the letters mean? When referring to the community it is shortened to LGBT+ as there are more letters than just the 4. I have put some of the common ones here: Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Transsexual Two-spirited Queer Questioning Intersex Asexual Ally Pansexual Agender Gender Queer Welcome everyone and hope to see you around on this thread and around the BB forums MP

Chris_B IMPORTANT: Information and guidelines for posting in this section
  • replies: 0

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe spa... View more

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe space to talk about how issues relating to gender identity and sexual orientation impact on mental health and wellbeing. 2. This includes discussion of and support around chronic illnesses such as HIV which disproportionately affect gay, bisexual and other men who have sex with men. 3. As this is a safe and affirming space for LGBTIQ individuals, please note this is not an appropriate space for debating the "rights and wrongs" of homosexuality, bisexuality, or gender fluidity itself. This includes use of terms such as "lifestyle" and "choice". 4. This sub-forum is and always will be a safe and supportive place for LGBTIQ people concerned with what we all need to do to stay well. That said, others are welcome provided they respect that this is primarily a LGBTIQ space. 5. If you do not identify as LGBTIQ, or are not currently supporting someone in your life who is LGBTIQ, and are curious about aspects of sexuality or gender identity, please read through beyondblue’s resources for and about LGBTIQ people here to educate yourself rather than posting in this section.

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nwalmien_naini Need to feel like that im not lost in a world of hatred...
  • replies: 10

Hi,Long story short, I'm gay. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have very religious parents and direct families. I have never heard them speak a kind word about gay people, or even a slight tone of sympathy. I feel like afailure to my parents. T... View more

Hi,Long story short, I'm gay. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have very religious parents and direct families. I have never heard them speak a kind word about gay people, or even a slight tone of sympathy. I feel like afailure to my parents. They always envisioned my five siblings and I to bring our spouse and kids along for family reunions, but I don't think they're going to be happy when I bring a boyfriend and no children. Somehow, I need to live the happy life, but most of the time I feel like that is impossible. And that's when the suicidal feelings come along. I've never attempted taking my life, but I feel like its going to be my only salvation from this pain and depression. Its as if life has set me up as a pawn on a larger battlefield, put in front of others so that they can feel more powerful. This fact taunts me so much, I've even written a song about it. Unfortunately, that song has gotten stuck in my head, and its thoughts aren't pleasant when I think about how much I am lost. I need help and love... Please... beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Believe000 I'm depressed and the cracks are showing.
  • replies: 9

i don't exactly know where to start so I'll see what unfolds on this post. i have suffered from depression since I was basically 13 years of age, falling in and out of it really - I've been through traumatic events in my life that sent me to extreme ... View more

i don't exactly know where to start so I'll see what unfolds on this post. i have suffered from depression since I was basically 13 years of age, falling in and out of it really - I've been through traumatic events in my life that sent me to extreme lows... I got over them on my own... But not completely.What upsets me so much is that I used to be such a positive and happy, bubbly kid... In and out... But now... It's just to hide the pain in feeling all the time... From the horrible things I've experienced... I've now grown to fear life - Im nervous almost all the time, I generally don't show it but I do when I'm alone at night... Or alone at home... Or with strangers... The list goes on... Recently I've hit a massive low in my life... My now ex fiancé was cheating on me when I ended the relationship due to feeling so down so I didn't want to bring him down... Turned out it was just a bridge for him to escape the relationship... And yes I am a gay male...aside from that I feel as if I'm in a tinted glass box where I see out, but no one sees in and sees me... I'm always crying at night and I'm always trying to make others happy, but when I reach out to people when they badger me about getting help... All I get is the cliche words of "you need to see a professional" or "I'm so sorry for you" it only makes it worse and now I've basically been feeling like I'm just non existent right now... My new boyfriend is amazing and he knows I used to suffer from depression but he doesn't know I'm suffering now... And I don't want him to know... I don't want to make him worried or anything. i currently can't afford to see a GP or see any professional... And I've done everything I can to get help... But now I'm sitting around my room or when i horse ride I think... "Why bother? Why bother living, when nothing in my life goes right... Not just even once?" There's more to all this but I don't want to drag this on... beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

hackneyed The thought of him being with anyone but me is soul crushing
  • replies: 14

I'm at the end of the road. I am currently plagued with a myriad of illnesses, so I'm not going into my situation with a very happy attitude. I'd hit rock bottom before I'd even gotten to whatever stage I'm at now, and I was ready to end it all until... View more

I'm at the end of the road. I am currently plagued with a myriad of illnesses, so I'm not going into my situation with a very happy attitude. I'd hit rock bottom before I'd even gotten to whatever stage I'm at now, and I was ready to end it all until by some stroke of luck I managed to meet someone. I'd always pushed my bisexuality (5 on a Kinsey scale) deep down and never acted or really "got in touch" with it. So I met someone online. I don't usually do this sort of a thing because I knew where I was heading and I didn't want to potentially upset anyone with my departure. We started talking, and we got along really well. Had very similar interests and a similar sense of humour. I started getting feelings for this person (he told me as soon as we started talking that he was bi) which I tried to ignore. We continued talking for a month or so and one day he wasn't online at the usual time. This worried me, and I got so worried that I actually started to get nervous. Then when he came online a couple days later I felt so relieved and I told him "I love you, don't you ever do that again". I soon realised what I had said and thought about it... I had fallen in love with him. We had snapchatted and all that sort of stuff and he told me he thought I was cute (something I'm not used to) and I originally wrote it off as "he's just nice, you don't really love him". But then he said it back. This confused me so much, and I asked him in what way and he stated "In a romantic way". I was really lost here, I'd never experienced these sorts of feelings before. This is when I did something I probably shouldn't have. I gave into it. We talked almost every day for 5 months after this. We said the 3 words all the time and it felt good. But here's the issue: he lives on the other side of the planet. The feeling of falling so hard for someone that I couldn't meet due to my illnesses was the most devastating, soul crushing feeling ever. So I told him, I told him my situation and he is still friends with me. He's admitted the romantic feelings, but is currently trying to get with someone he knows. The thought of him being with anyone but me is soul crushing. He doesn't want me to leave him, but I think he's making me worse. I'm so lonely...beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

OliveOyl In need of some support
  • replies: 4

Hi there...I have recently been through yet another break up, and although I thought I was going okay with it, some things have set me right back. I thought I had pulled myself out of depression, but I think I'm in denial at whether it has crept it's... View more

Hi there...I have recently been through yet another break up, and although I thought I was going okay with it, some things have set me right back. I thought I had pulled myself out of depression, but I think I'm in denial at whether it has crept it's way back into my head and my heart. I find myself feeling so negatively, and it's completely exhausting I get so very, very lonely and so very, very tired...I'm a single full time mum and I work full time, it's all so hard. I am in need of just some genuine support.

Jah-eva I feel like I'm in too deep....
  • replies: 3

Hi, I don't know where to start seems like there is too much but here goes... My partner suffers from severe depression, bad anxiety, she had a lot of attachment dissorders, she selfharms, suicidal, she identifies as an a sexual plus she's on the spe... View more

Hi, I don't know where to start seems like there is too much but here goes... My partner suffers from severe depression, bad anxiety, she had a lot of attachment dissorders, she selfharms, suicidal, she identifies as an a sexual plus she's on the spectrum. She is in therapy and had been for most of her life plus on medication so everything is in place to help her cope. so the issue is me, lately I'm struggling to cope with keeping her up and safe and just living at the moment. It's a real hard spot at the moment. I don't have any friends or family around me as I moved interstate to be with her so being able to debrief and have time to myself isn't happening so that's why I'm here to ask for some coping strategies to deal with this. It's hard for me to be the happy one keeping it all together when really I just want to curl up and cry but I can't cause she needs me to keep her happy and me being down will make her worse.

Bunny_Love_1777 Trying to come out - My head makes no sense!
  • replies: 4

Ok, so i came out to two friends when i was about 12 saying i liked one of the friends (I am female btw and so is she) it was a big thing for a few weeks but they soon forgot about it (seems like i forgot about it coz one friend still remembers it) I... View more

Ok, so i came out to two friends when i was about 12 saying i liked one of the friends (I am female btw and so is she) it was a big thing for a few weeks but they soon forgot about it (seems like i forgot about it coz one friend still remembers it) I am now 17 and i am finally starting to realise i dont think it was just a fase of being Bi. But i still dont know... my brain just seems so all over the place i never know anything its trying to figure out. My main question is, how did you know yor sexuality was/is true. I know not all label themselves but it would be nice to finally work it out.

octavia17 need advice - what am I??
  • replies: 6

I've been confused for a few years now, I'm female and I've had boyfriends and I'm attracted to men, but I think I'm also attracted to women? I like to watch female on female porn and have kissed a few girls but I'm just not sure?? Am I bisexual or j... View more

I've been confused for a few years now, I'm female and I've had boyfriends and I'm attracted to men, but I think I'm also attracted to women? I like to watch female on female porn and have kissed a few girls but I'm just not sure?? Am I bisexual or just curious?

Violet_Eyes The Love Lost
  • replies: 16

Hi everyone, I'm new to this site & last week I tried to end my life again, the lack of support I have by my family is frustrating me. They know I'm on medication for my depression but their opinion is I need to harden up! Well I'm a Transexual & hav... View more

Hi everyone, I'm new to this site & last week I tried to end my life again, the lack of support I have by my family is frustrating me. They know I'm on medication for my depression but their opinion is I need to harden up! Well I'm a Transexual & have been since obviously knowing as a young child & started HRT when I was 16 with no family support where I had to leave home. Although I can walk around in public without people knowing I'm transexual 99% of the time I still find it hard to deal with my gender. I try explaining to my family how hard life is for me & had been since a child but they don't want to listen to my sad stories. I had to move back to my family because I fractured my ankle & being a full time casual worker I wasn't covered for compensation & couldn't afford to keep my apartment because of it. As much as I appreciate my family letting me stay they don't make me feel all that welcome which over a period of time my frustration has built up, they have told me they don't want me here but they know I have nowhere else to go until I can get back on my feet. Being in this environment is toxic & making me feel more depressed to the point where I have been drinking a lot. I know I shouldn't be mixing my medication with alcohol but If you saw the love lost with my family you would understand. We don't drink at home as we don't like drinking around children but I have snuck the odd bottle of wine in my room which makes me feel bad because I love my nephew & niece but I'm disrespecting their home & family house rules. My family except the kids make me feel unwanted, unloved & unappreciated regardless of all the helpful & kind things I do for them, my drinking has become that bad lately that I'm on a dating site where I meet up with random guys and get drunk & I don't even care because all I want is to get away from my family home.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Violet_Eyes the next steps
  • replies: 2

I finally went to a Mental Health clinic to discuss my depression & alcohol abuse, It was great & my assessor was absolutely wonderful to talk with. Overall I've made the first steps to recovery & contacted alcohol support groups which have suggested... View more

I finally went to a Mental Health clinic to discuss my depression & alcohol abuse, It was great & my assessor was absolutely wonderful to talk with. Overall I've made the first steps to recovery & contacted alcohol support groups which have suggested I should go to Rehab to not only stop abusing alcohol to forget who I am but also to remember the person I was before heavily drinking & reconnect with myself. So it's a start, my family are giving me the silent treatment a bit but maybe that's because of me, who knows I'm just focused on the next step. I woke up feeling weird today with slight anxiety & still feel anxious, surprisingly though I don't feel like a drink but that may change later on in the day.

Nickname_204C26A8-F9A3-4D Is it still a phase 8 years later
  • replies: 1

So I’m 14 now, I’ve been attracted to girls since I was just a little kid, I had little silly boyfriends but I was more attracted to girls, I thought It was just a phase sort of thing. I grew up still being turned on by girls. I was scared at this po... View more

So I’m 14 now, I’ve been attracted to girls since I was just a little kid, I had little silly boyfriends but I was more attracted to girls, I thought It was just a phase sort of thing. I grew up still being turned on by girls. I was scared at this point. I’m now 14 and still very attracted to girls, I’ve had a few boyfriends and it was fun, but I’m not sexually attracted to men. I’m sexually attracted to women, just don’t find men’s private parts normal.. (I’m still a virgin but I don’t like men’s down there so I probably will be for quite a long time) I’m scaredthat if I ask someone if this is wrong I’ll be judged for liking girls more. Am I bi? Is it still a phase? I’m too scared to tell anyone because I just too afraid... Please help.