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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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J7 help - new to this
  • replies: 6

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I have no reason to be sad.I have a great job which i enjoy, a supportive family and finally great friends. I have felt like this for years. But i hate myself. I put on a facade to everyone that i am ok. Some days ... View more

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I have no reason to be sad.I have a great job which i enjoy, a supportive family and finally great friends. I have felt like this for years. But i hate myself. I put on a facade to everyone that i am ok. Some days I am better and others I am so low I cannot be reached.I have locked myself away from everyone and have taken two weeks off work. I feel I just cannot face anything right now. I have been drinking to the point that I cannot remember anything and then I have days of eating so much crap that I feel physically sick. I am overweight and have been trying to lose weight for most of my life. I am only 26 and I thought I would have done so much more by now. My last relationship was a year ago and it still haunts me. I loved him so much but I had to end it. All I want is to be desired, loved and this year I have been getting so drunk and sleeping with random men for a moment of intimacy. I crave love, thats all i want and because I want it that bad I know I wont get it. I feel like I have no option but to actually get help. I’ve been thinking about ending things and how much of a relief on everyone it would be. I just feel like a burden. I am unsure if this is depression? I just needed to vent.beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

pursuitofhappiness Positive thoughts, positive life :)
  • replies: 5

I'm slowly recovering from depression and wanted to share how much of a difference it can just make to think positive!! I woke up one day and decided that I had had ENOUGH of feeling worthless and constantly crying and always feeling this overwhelmin... View more

I'm slowly recovering from depression and wanted to share how much of a difference it can just make to think positive!! I woke up one day and decided that I had had ENOUGH of feeling worthless and constantly crying and always feeling this overwhelming sadness, I realised that it was up to ME and no one else to change the way I think and to be happy. I just saw this quote online: "Actually, I just woke up one day and decided I didn't want to feel like that anyone, or ever again. So I changed. Just like that". And it's possible! Be grateful for all of the good things in your life, and when you face anything negative, see it as an opportunity to grow, to learn, to overcome, to be better, and to be stronger!! You can do it!! There's goodness all around and we just have to choose to see it and appreciate it! And I just wanted to post the following for anyone who needs this: "If you find yourself stuck in traffic; don't despair. There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard of privilege. Should you have a bad day at work; think of the man who has been out of work for years. Should you despair over a relationship gone bad; think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return. Should you grieve the passing of another weekend; think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children. Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance; think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk. Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror; think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine. Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose? Be thankful. There are those who didn't live long enough to get the opportunity. Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities; remember, things could be worse. You could be one of them!" I hope that no part of this post upsets anyone in anyone and I hope it inspires you to make that change and make that decision to be positive. It is so so worth it. I know now that I only have one life so it's up to me to make it the best that it can be. I'm not going to let anyone or anything bring me down because I am worth so much more than that, I deserve to be happy and so do each and everyone of you!

guest75 a letter to my wife
  • replies: 4

i had to get some stuff out of my head so i wrote a letter to my wife that i dont intend sending to her but will show her when/if this ivo stuff goes away Dear Tara, I write you this letter to you, knowing you may never read it, but writing it is hel... View more

i had to get some stuff out of my head so i wrote a letter to my wife that i dont intend sending to her but will show her when/if this ivo stuff goes away Dear Tara, I write you this letter to you, knowing you may never read it, but writing it is helping me deal with the situation at the minute I need to tell you that I am still head over heels in love with you. I still want to be with you. You and the kids mean everything to me and I feel like an empty shell without you guys I know I've made mistakes, I know I have said and done things I cant take back. I know I don’t deserve another chance. I am trying to change, I am trying to become a better partner, a better dad, a better man. I am doing everything I can think of to improve – I am on anti depressants, I am seeing a psychologist who told me the caffeine in coke can make depression and anxiety worse, so I have given the up cold turkey since before Christmas. I have a new job on the docks in Melbourne, that I am driving to everyday, but have an interview for a role here in town next week that I will take if successful. I have joined a number of depression forums (beyond blue, etc) to talk with people in similar situations to me. I am doing everything I can think of to get better, for you, for the kids Tara, I am scared, scared like I have never been before. Scared I’m going to lose you, lose the kids. I’m fighting as hard as I can, but without you I’m struggling. I’m absolutely exhausted, not physically, but emotionally. I’m struggling to see any light at the end of the tunnel. I joined mensline today to ask if any other men had gone through the IVO process. That has scared me even more. You told mum you didn’t want to do this, and if I got myself sorted out by the 21st then everything would return to normal. I’m getting by each day on that hope, but I’m really starting to lose hope and don’t know what to do. I love you with every part of my being and I can honestly put my hand on my heart and say that if this is over, I don’t want anyone else, I will never be with anyone else – you are the only person I want to be with I am going to close this now by saying, I LOVE YOU, you mean everything to me Love Always Matty

guest75 everything i've done has been for NOTHING
  • replies: 3

Everything i've done over the passed month has been for nothing Everything i've done to try and improve myself, for nothing It was all for her - I NEED her in my life, not want, NEED...I've been trying to become a better person, im fighting what is a... View more

Everything i've done over the passed month has been for nothing Everything i've done to try and improve myself, for nothing It was all for her - I NEED her in my life, not want, NEED...I've been trying to become a better person, im fighting what is apparently a losing battle alone, i had summoned enough strength in myself to get thru until the 21st, but what then? I dont have the strength to keep going much longer

Jo3 can someone talk to me pls
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone I need to talk to someone. I am feeling panicky, emotional and not with it. Hope someone can come on and chat with me. Jo

Hi everyone I need to talk to someone. I am feeling panicky, emotional and not with it. Hope someone can come on and chat with me. Jo

bCalm How do I help loved one?
  • replies: 6

Hi all, I am after any good advice. My grilfriend who is usually positive and motivated is in a rough patch. She is out of work and struggling financially. I unfortunately have been through the same deal but have managed to land some work now and am ... View more

Hi all, I am after any good advice. My grilfriend who is usually positive and motivated is in a rough patch. She is out of work and struggling financially. I unfortunately have been through the same deal but have managed to land some work now and am starting to recover financially. However I am limited in what I can do for her financially still, and to make matters worse we live interstate to each other, we try and catch up every couple of weeks around mainly my off week for my kids visit times. She has been down for some time, but is getting worse. I have been through previous down times with her due to death in the family or work stress, and I believe I am a good listener and have some understanding of her feelings. She is not scared of talking to professionals and has been to counselling in the past but not yet in this case. She has been to her doctor and he has prescribed an antidepressant. She has never been on medicine during our time together, so I am anxious about this. She has been on this for 2-3 weeks and is now constantly tired, is still down, not able to see light at end of tunnel and hard to talk to, very emotional, easily upset, crying, I think even borderline statements about suicide a couple of times, such as "I just want to go to sleep and not wake up". Its really hard to feel like I'm helping at all from the other end of the phone. I'm just listening, comforting and encouraging as best as I can. Her regular doctor is away for a couple more weeks, but I think she needs to get the medication reviewed and start seeing a counsellor asap. I might be able to get some friends to drop into her a little too. Not sure, what do you experienced or qualified people think? Any advice?

iusedtobefamous Scared.
  • replies: 2

I don't know what to do. I suffered pretty badly from severe depression and anxiety when i was a teenager (12-18, literally the whole time I was a teenager). I'm 21 now, and I honestly thought I was better. But lately, I don't know, I've been really ... View more

I don't know what to do. I suffered pretty badly from severe depression and anxiety when i was a teenager (12-18, literally the whole time I was a teenager). I'm 21 now, and I honestly thought I was better. But lately, I don't know, I've been really struggling, and It's honestly scaring the crap out of me. I had to quit my job because a guy there was being an arse to me, and it got to the point where I just couldn't go in there. I was standing in the car park having a full on panic attack because his car was there, and I literally just turned and ran away. I spent the rest of that day crying in bed, I just felt so pathetic. Like, if i was any regular kind of person, I'd be able to deal with it or something. I don't know. It's just that I haven't felt like this in years. I didn't realize it was still a risk. I don't want to hurt myself, I was so proud of myself for stopping that, but I'm having those urges again, and it's really scaring me, and I don't know how strong my willpower to not do it is, and I made an appointment to see my psychologist, but she's away til the 21st, and that just seems like so far away. I don't feel like I can talk to my family about how I'm feeling (I still live at home), I just feel like I've put them through so much already, and it would be so unfair especially on my mum to make her have to start worrying about me like that again. I'm just really scared, and worried, and I feel so alone, and useless and pathetic. I'm home alone all day today, and I'm really worried about how I'm going to try to distract myself from feeling like I want to hurt myself. 'beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.'

guest75 im losing the will to fight on
  • replies: 26

ive had my kids the last 2 days. it made me happy today my daughter hugged me and told me i was "the best dad she'd ever had" to which i replied "im the only dad youve ever had" and she says "nuh uh mummy has a new boyfriend" i litterally felt my hea... View more

ive had my kids the last 2 days. it made me happy today my daughter hugged me and told me i was "the best dad she'd ever had" to which i replied "im the only dad youve ever had" and she says "nuh uh mummy has a new boyfriend" i litterally felt my heart break in 2, a tear welled up in my eye and i could feel my will to keep fighting, to keep on going sliding away she told me she was joking but its left me feeling like an empty shell and i dont know if i want to keep on fighting add to that im currently being forced to live with my mother (i have no other options) and i just feel like a huge burden on her and my sister and really get the feeling i am not wanted i just want to give up

Teddas Going off line
  • replies: 2

Hi all, am just posting this to say am going to disappear from posting for a little while. I know how caring people are on here and don't want people worrying. To be honest l am just spent, so tired of feeling like this. I suppose not sleeping since ... View more

Hi all, am just posting this to say am going to disappear from posting for a little while. I know how caring people are on here and don't want people worrying. To be honest l am just spent, so tired of feeling like this. I suppose not sleeping since Saturday night isn't helping but all l can say is l'm exhausted. Was sitting last night watching my 15yo daughter and 11yo son playing Xbox with my 'wife' sitting in a different room ignoring me ( well us l suppose ). Video games bore me so started cleaning old photos off my phone. Found some pics of the friend that now hates me. Nothing rude, just her blowing me a kiss etc. Started me on a downward spin. Started thinking the last time we were together was at a work friends wedding. We were invited as a cpl but it was a shocking night. Put my arm around her and she pushed it off, tried to hold her hand and she pulled away, wouldn't even dance with me. When we got home she put pillow and doona on the couch. By the time these memories had come flooding but l was sitting there in tears. Got up and went to bed but got worse. Lay there thinking if the two women l have had real feelings for in the past 22 years now think l am worthless maybe they are right. Tried thinking of my kids but that didn't help. Have a 20yo in Qld at uni that will never come home again because he can't handle the tension, l said l would fix it but can't so that's my fault. A 19yo who just puts his hand out and his mother gives him money, l can't make home see how he should act to be a good man. 15yo girl who won't speak with her mother and 11yo autistic son who only has one problem left. That is can't control his bowels and because l can't get myself together l keep forgetting his medicine. All feels like my fault. Lay in bed all night staring at the ceiling wondering what l have done wrong. If God only gives you what you can handle he must think l'm Hercules, and l'm not. I am sick of this feeling. I hate feeling alone and dont cope with it. I know there are people who care but the ones l want to don't or in my mother's case have passed away. I Don't get embarrassed about crying because do it so often, am while trying to type this. 10 years ago l would wake up and think away we go, take on the world. 5 years ago l would think, oh no here we go again.Now l wake and think bugger l woke up ! I talk to friends but seem to say the same thing over and over. Am stuck in this crappy circle but somehow get worse. I dont know how to stop it. Stop caring for the friend l saw a future with, the wife who obviously doesn't see anything there now. Feel like l just let everyone down. Sounds self indulgent but l use to be the person people looked up to, great marriage, great kids, always there to help and always having a laugh. God l miss that time and feel l am letting down all those people. I will be back on here soon l hope but if this is not rock bottom l hate to think it can get worse. Again l feel now l am letting you all down to. You are all stronger than you think at the moment, and can see from what l read you all learning and leaning on each other. Keep working on the baby steps and you can achieve things. Good luck xx

REnigmaK I'm so over life
  • replies: 2

I'm sick of this thing called life. I have done so much for my family over the years and all I have in return is a resume that won't get me a job. I haven't been in a relationship for years and can't find anyone who is actually interested in me. I'm ... View more

I'm sick of this thing called life. I have done so much for my family over the years and all I have in return is a resume that won't get me a job. I haven't been in a relationship for years and can't find anyone who is actually interested in me. I'm 30 and don't have children, medically unable to and yet in my culture it is extremely important for women to have children. I see everyone around me settling down with partners, having children, good jobs, a house and car. I have none of that and it pushes me further down into the depression hole. I have the kind of family that won't let go of me, allow me to establish my life, every time I try and get away, they pull me back into their toxic web. There is no longer a reason for my living except being their slave.