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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Kyles I would like to get back some of my energy and enthusiasm
  • replies: 2

Hi. I had a nervous breakdown about 9 years ago now. Since then I have been 'retired' from work, and am under the care of a psychiatrist. I am medicated at present. I was reading an article today which talked depression suffered by a few high profile... View more

Hi. I had a nervous breakdown about 9 years ago now. Since then I have been 'retired' from work, and am under the care of a psychiatrist. I am medicated at present. I was reading an article today which talked depression suffered by a few high profile people - John Hamm and Ruby Rose amongst them. In essence, John's story was 'got sick, took anti-depressants, now I'm back', while Ruby's was more 'have suffered from this most of my life'. Do you/ CAN you ever get better from this? My doctors says I will never be what I was before. I feel like I have lost so much. I know I have changed a lot, but I would like to get back some of my energy and enthusiasm. I feel like I've been sick forever. Can anyone help me? Cheers, Kyles

ashaboo9 tips or suggestions on how to help your partner understand your illness
  • replies: 1

Hi all,Im not usually one to post these types of things but feeling pretty down tonight and thought I might share. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety 5 years ago. I have kept it to myself for years, no one would suspect me as someone with a ... View more

Hi all,Im not usually one to post these types of things but feeling pretty down tonight and thought I might share. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety 5 years ago. I have kept it to myself for years, no one would suspect me as someone with a mental illness, I have a supportive family, have been in a relationship for 4 years now and generally live a normal and happy life in the eyes of everyone around me. Sometimes though, I wish that they would understand the complexities of my illness and how their actions or words effect me behind closed doors. My partner skips around my issues most of the time, when I start to feel anxious about something and tell him I am upset, he forgets how hard I take things and gets angry at me for being upset. Its just a circle, I get upset, he gets angry then I get more upset, work myself up, sometimes have a panic attack, sometimes feel like harming myself, sometimes feel like putting myself out of my misery. Does anyone have any tips or suggestions on how to help your partner understand your illness? Or how they can help in these situations? Would be great to hear from people in similar situations.

Mares73 If I have to do this alone, where do I start?
  • replies: 10

Hi all Geoff and I are in the middle of a discussion about this which we are working thru separately. several weeks ago I was suicidal, my thoughts were out of my control & I would of done anything to feel better but nothing worked-it took time & tal... View more

Hi all Geoff and I are in the middle of a discussion about this which we are working thru separately. several weeks ago I was suicidal, my thoughts were out of my control & I would of done anything to feel better but nothing worked-it took time & talking on here to get through that terrible period. I'm now seeing my Pyschiatrist again & she believes I've gone as far as I can with medication. That there are issues in my life I need to confront in order to ever get better. i wondered what you all thought? I'd always believed it was so debilitating that there was nothing I could do but endure it. But now I've been told depression can be overcome by improving Selfesteem, having a purpose, challenging negative thoughts & confronting my fear & avoidance. My pysch said 'depression doesn't control you unless you let it'. She also suggested a book called "Beating the Blues" which doesn't provide for depression except challenging behaviours. i feel overwhelmed. If I have to do this alone, where do I start? Would appreciate opinions Lve Mares

dazzsyd I feel like a caged and wounded animal
  • replies: 2

Just needed to post somewhereHave suffered depression most of my life, but since 2009 its been getting worse and over the last year, so bad that there seems to be no end in sight. I've seen psychiatrists, psychologists and taken medication but nothin... View more

Just needed to post somewhereHave suffered depression most of my life, but since 2009 its been getting worse and over the last year, so bad that there seems to be no end in sight. I've seen psychiatrists, psychologists and taken medication but nothing seems to have "taken", partly because I have, at least prior to 2011 tried to please the specialists I've been seeing and made out like things were improving, when they were not.I feel like a caged and wounded animal, I feel like a nothing. I no longer have friends,bar one , who is an ex-partner. My family is part of the problem - my upbringing and more recently my mother have caused my great unhappiness and I cannot get over it - I know I need to forgive and move on, but how? They don't recognise that they ever did anything wrong, they don't see how I can be so hurt by them bending over backwards and doing everything they can to help my sister through her tough times (which is appropriate) but they could never, ever try and do anything to help my through this, in fact going out of their way to make it worse. My family loves me but only because of familial bonds - there is no mutual respect, there is no attempt by them to understand or know me in any way.Every night I go to bed and pray that I don't wake up. I manage to get through work, come home, and either cry or sit and feel numb. I have nobody to talk to and I'm scared I'm going to do something stupid because my only friend is leaving the country for a month and then I really will have nobody to talk to.I just want this to stop. I have no life to speak of. I have no joy, nothing to look forward to. If I try and go out, I become overwhelmed and leave usually in tears, because I know I don't belong out there among decent, normal human beings.I'm sorry for the rambling nature of this post, I cannot think coherently at present and I apologise to those who may have wasted their time reading this. beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

nickers12 It's exhausting lying to people who care about you
  • replies: 1

So, this post is a long time in the making! The reason I've not done anything about how I feel is because I just can't explain how I feel exactly. I think I'm depressed and I think it's getting worse, although I do wonder if it's just me being lazy s... View more

So, this post is a long time in the making! The reason I've not done anything about how I feel is because I just can't explain how I feel exactly. I think I'm depressed and I think it's getting worse, although I do wonder if it's just me being lazy so that I don't have to achieve anything in my life, like maybe I'm making it all up to explain why after almost 32 years of existence I still haven't achieved anything. I can't recall a time in the last 15 years where I've been happy for an extended period of time. I asked my Dr many years ago why I felt awful, couldn't sleep & had a constant tightness in my chest and he said it was because "I was going through a rough patch in my life" as I was in a terrible relationship, hated my job and things with my friends were starting to change. I figured he was probably right and that things would get better. Anyway, fast forward to today and things aren't better and have hardly gotten better since then. My boyfriend of 4 years says I'm the most negative person he has ever known!! This is coming from the person who loves me the most in the world, who doesn't want to be without me. Though I don't know why, I'm so awful to him at times I make him cry & make him feel bad about himself to take the spotlight off of me! I feel so lost sometimes that I just cry. Some days are good, some are great, and some are just down right awful. I don't share my feelings with my partner or my family as I just can't talk about this stuff and I feel like I've been acting "Ok" for such a long time around them that I don't know how to be truthful, although there is a long line of depression in my family. I hate the thought of coming across as weak and I don't want to share my feelings with them, I guess that's why I came here instead. My current situation is this: Unemployed after losing my job last year, (I had a job for about 3 months that made me so anxious I was physically sick for the entire time & couldn't handle it so had to resign, even though my boss told me she didn't want me to because I was doing such a great job!), absolutely no income & having to borrow from my partner to pay my personal bills so now in debt, applying for jobs and getting absolutely no response (studying online in the meantime), sleeping patterns drastically changed so bed at 5am and up at 11am or 12pm, no motivation to do anything, anxious to talk on the phone or to go out, living in a town where I have no friends but unable to make friends as anything social is getting harder & harder for me and it goes on and on. There are so many more things going on I could talk about but I've gone on long enough. I just don't know where to start. I feel like my "normal" or "happy" feelings are neither normal nor truly happy, but I can't remember not being like this. I see people who seem genuinely happy and I know that's not how I feel. I don't want to act anymore, it's exhausting lying to people who care about you. It feels awful to tell your mother that "Things are great" when earlier that morning you were disappointed that you actually woke up. Even now I've sat for 10 minutes contemplating whether to push the Post this thread button because I'm afraid it's the wrong thing to do! I'm pushing it now & hope that someone out there might be able to offer my some kind of insight! Thanks in advance

Stuck14 My counsellor thinks I need to have a "meltdown"
  • replies: 5

I have been fighting to keep myself here for a long time now and am really wondering why I bother. I don't have anyone or anything in my life that is keeping me here. I feel like I'm a punching bag, taking hit after hit. My gp has prescribed medicati... View more

I have been fighting to keep myself here for a long time now and am really wondering why I bother. I don't have anyone or anything in my life that is keeping me here. I feel like I'm a punching bag, taking hit after hit. My gp has prescribed medication an I don't know what to do. I have had alot of bad experiences with meds an I just don't want it to stop me from being able to express myself when I allow it. My counsellor thinks I need to have a "meltdown" an just allow it to happen, an I know they are right, I don't know how to tho. Sorry, it's not making much sense. I just don't know what to do anymore? What's the point?

Mares73 Holding on to what I'm losing
  • replies: 13

I pray to wake up without tears of dread. I pray that my children will see me smile again i pray that the empty, lost person I am will one day learn to live again. I don't think I'm asking for the world. I'm asking for myself to be found under the cr... View more

I pray to wake up without tears of dread. I pray that my children will see me smile again i pray that the empty, lost person I am will one day learn to live again. I don't think I'm asking for the world. I'm asking for myself to be found under the crushing pain. I'm asking for help to lift that load so I know how to live in freedom again. The hopelessness, despair & self hate are my only companions, beating me down to the point I myself can't be found. Please please help me, I fall lower each day and the fight gets greater each day. I have no one. My husband can't handle it & finds solace in work, I've isolated myself from everyone I know. I used to be the life of the party. Now I don't recognise who I am. It's so true what one member wrote-that she didn't want to die but more importantly she didn't want to live. Yes that's me. I have to live for others but I can't find a reason for myself right now.

Suzbj Has anyone got any advise how to stop the utter fatigue and sense of hopelessness?
  • replies: 5

Hi Everyone, The depression has got much deeper. I'm now utterly exhausted and feeling hopeless and so so tired - not just physically but mentally and re trying. I'm still going to try but I don't want to get out of bed now. I can't function or think... View more

Hi Everyone, The depression has got much deeper. I'm now utterly exhausted and feeling hopeless and so so tired - not just physically but mentally and re trying. I'm still going to try but I don't want to get out of bed now. I can't function or think and have slept these last few days day and night waking for short periods.I don't want to wake up - I just want to sleep and stop. Stop trying. (No - I'm not suicidal but it is very dark). I get energy and start positive things for a time and then it all gets sucked away by this extreme tiredness. Please help Suz

SillySonia Having a bad day
  • replies: 5

Feel alone, isolated and unloved. How worse can it get?

Feel alone, isolated and unloved. How worse can it get?

Bell 3 tablespoons of DARKNESS every year
  • replies: 5

Hello Beyond Blue community, I have depression that is most prominent in DEC-JAN-FEB of every year, hence the 3 tablespoons. It's only now that it's really clicked that it's those months specifically and it's when my father passed away 10 years ago n... View more

Hello Beyond Blue community, I have depression that is most prominent in DEC-JAN-FEB of every year, hence the 3 tablespoons. It's only now that it's really clicked that it's those months specifically and it's when my father passed away 10 years ago now. I still get dished out some heavy weeks here and there but I feel like a steady 4 out of 12 months I am just good for nothing. I have got a referral for a psychiatrist and waiting at the phone for that call when I can go and see them. I tried last year to get better and fell back into smoking pot which I've used several times to "get better" (more like forget about it so I never get well). I'm getting really bad now, my mum has severe depression and has admitted herself to a mental ward in the past. I feel bad for stacking my problems on hers so I rarely do, and I live away from most of my family. I have a good life, a lovely girlfriend and a wonderful sharehome but i still can't stop these feelings of despair. Can anyone recommend any good psychologists that practice in Melbourne I can get to quickly? I feel like a tiny wall that's got lucky in the eye of the storm but will be destroyed any time soon... Sincerely, Bellamy