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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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littleleague Intrusive thoughts
  • replies: 1

Hey everyone, I'm 24, currently working & at uni (from home), living with my parents and younger brothers in Melbourne. I'm finishing my masters in environmental sustainability this semester which is an area I'm really passionate in, and work for a g... View more

Hey everyone, I'm 24, currently working & at uni (from home), living with my parents and younger brothers in Melbourne. I'm finishing my masters in environmental sustainability this semester which is an area I'm really passionate in, and work for a good non-profit (though I'm very bored of the work I'm doing, especially while working from home.) I've been struggling with anxiety and intrusive depressive thoughts for the last few years. I notice a spike when the weather starts to turn (as it has in Melbourne the last week), when it gets cooler, less sunlight, more clouds etc. Don't want to label it as seasonal depression since I've never been diagnosed but yeah my symptoms match a lot of those symptoms -- just really flat mood, lack of energy, negative outlook, moody. Little things really set off little depressive episodes and really intrusive thoughts. Like today my mum gave me a business sweater as an easter gift which is nice of her I guess but I've told her before that I don't need sweaters because I don't wear them for work or for anything so it's a waste, and I'd told my parents that when they wanted to buy me one when we were overseas in Canada over new year's (they still bought me one and it's been sitting in my closet ever since). But anyway my mum gave me the sweater and I told her again that I don't need one and it'll just go to waste, so it's better if they return it or give it to my brothers or something instead of it gathering dust in my closet. And just saying that has set off a little depressive episode, me feeling guilty about saying that, wishing I was more grateful, hating myself for maybe disappointing them etc. It's happened a lot lately w little things. I'm not sure how to cope with it the next few months. I saw a therapist a few times last spring for anxiety and she was kind of helpful but then I haven't been back to see her since about November and although there's tele-therapy or whatever, I don't feel comfortable having these discussions out loud in my family home with a therapist, and with lockdown there's nowhere else I can really go. Sport and gym really made me happy the last two years but now that's gone as well, I still do workouts at home which is good but still miss playing sport and the social aspect. I'm an introvert so don't mind time on my own though, solo walks have been good. Not sure what else to say or what I'm looking for -- solidarity, advice, questions, dunno. Just feeling flat and thought I should make a post.

Mia99 Need advice
  • replies: 2

Hi, I need some advice. I’ve been struggling terribly with mood swings for a while now. I’ve only really taken notice how extreme my mood swings are over recent weeks. One day I’m happy and motivated and the next I feel worthless and empty. I find th... View more

Hi, I need some advice. I’ve been struggling terribly with mood swings for a while now. I’ve only really taken notice how extreme my mood swings are over recent weeks. One day I’m happy and motivated and the next I feel worthless and empty. I find that I get agitated by the smallest things. Or some days I wake up agitated and angry and I don’t know why. Some days I find myself wishing that I could just disappear. I don’t know why I feel this way, there is nothing particularly wrong in my life. I have these so called ‘bad days’ at least a couple days a week. And some days its a rollercoaster of emotions that I feel like I can’t control. I have every reason to be happy but I don’t think I am. My friends get annoyed at me because they think I’m angry with them, and when I tell them I’m not and they ask why I’m acting this way, I can’t come up with an answer. I don’t know whether this is something serious or not. I don’t know if I’m exaggerating it in my head or if I should actually see someone for this. I just want to be able to be happy. Is this something I should see someone for? I also don’t have the money to go and see someone but I know that some of it can be covered by Medicare. I guess I’d also like to know how that process works? If anyone has any advice or has experienced something like this please let me know, I’m struggling to understand whats going on with me.

marlixo my introduction - really struggling with depression, social anxiety and bdd
  • replies: 3

hello everyone, this is my first time using the forums here so hope I'm doing this right! First I'll give a bit of backstory. I'm a 17-year-old girl and have been diagnosed with depression, social phobia, body dysmorphia and an eating disorder all in... View more

hello everyone, this is my first time using the forums here so hope I'm doing this right! First I'll give a bit of backstory. I'm a 17-year-old girl and have been diagnosed with depression, social phobia, body dysmorphia and an eating disorder all in the past year. Basically I hate the way I look and have low confidence and self-esteem as well as perfectionist tendencies/ocd which leads into social phobia as I am constantly worried of what others are thinking of me. The depression comes from that and is up and down, I'm currently going through a really low point and am struggling. I'm on medication which has recently increased. One area I'm really struggling in is academics. I'm in year 11 and used to be very academic, would rank first in my classes and get awards at final assemblys etc. however all of the mental struggles have completely ruined my studies and my cognitive functioning. I'm failing almost all of my classes. I find it so difficult to focus on tasks and even when I do, I just feel my brain doesn't work. I can't think or remember information or anything, it's so frustrating and ends up making me feel more hopeless and depressed. So I guess I'm looking for an advice on how to accept the fact that I can't do as well in school as I previously have. I also feel everyone (teachers, other students) have such high expectations of me and I'm scared for them to see that I'm no longer that good. Would really like to hear other stories of how mental illness has affected your cognitive function or studies. I'd also really like to hear from people who have both depression and social anxiety (and maybe even BDD) as I find it's just a vicious cycle where I can never win. I have these feelings about the way I look (that I'm disgusting etc.) and then they lead into social anxiety and missing many opportunities because I fear others will also have negative thoughts about me/judge me etc. which leads to me feeling more lonely, isolated, hopeless and depressed. I wish I had more friends and could go out and socialise at parties and be confident etc. but I get so anxious. I constantly worry that people will think I'm awkward or weird or ugly. I haven't mentioned a lot of other stuff but I think this is a good place to start. Any replies would be much appreciated, I think it'd be really helpful to talk to other people who are going through the same things. Thanks.

dew SSRIs and Infidelity<br />  
  • replies: 2

I (F21) have been in a long term relationship with my partner (M26) for 3 and a half years. We have bought a house together and were looking to get engaged later in the year. I have been on antidepressants most of that time but around 6 months ago, t... View more

I (F21) have been in a long term relationship with my partner (M26) for 3 and a half years. We have bought a house together and were looking to get engaged later in the year. I have been on antidepressants most of that time but around 6 months ago, the psychiatrist I was seeing kept upping the dose of the medication I was on to the highest dose someone can get prescribed to. I have been on this dose for about 4 months now. I am a short and small girl. I gained about 15kgs on this medication. I also got prescribed to several other medications. This has made me emotionally numb. I now have no feelings for my boyfriend and when he traveled for his mum's surgery back home, I slept with 4 different guys in 3 days, since I didn't feel I had love for him and didn't enjoy being intimate for him anymore for about 2 months. I slept with them not because I wanted to find another relationship but rather because I had no self worth and just wanted to feel something. He still really loves me and I feel I do love him too but it is just numb. Everything is numb, including my feeling towards my parents, friends and other social groups. I found using illegal drugs every day in extremely high doses would be the only way I would feel things. My daily routine would be to sleep until about 2/3pm and then go to work if I felt like it, otherwise I'd call in sick. I would then just use drugs, then spend all night watching YouTube videos until I fell asleep. On the night he caught me cheating, I had been using drugs just to feel something, because I didn't regret it or feel sad about it. We both really want this relationship to continue and he is prepared to forgive me but recommends I lower my dose and follow up with another psychiatrist. We are now back to our home town. At the moment, I am in my country with my family and he is in another city with his family. We want to work on ourselves during this time. It is really hard to seek for professional help at the moment due to the lack of health care in my country. Since I live in a small town, there is no psychiatrist in my hometown. I cannot go to bigger city since I am on quarantine. People see mental health differently in my country too. Would this numbness be because of my antidepressants? TLDR; I don't feel like I love my boyfriend anymore so I cheated on him with 4 guys during one night stands

Ada1 Feeling very isolated
  • replies: 3

Hi, I am new to this forum but I thought it can help to talk to people who might understand. I am struggling to fit in this world where technology and social media are replacing real relationships. Slowly over the time, I became disconnected from peo... View more

Hi, I am new to this forum but I thought it can help to talk to people who might understand. I am struggling to fit in this world where technology and social media are replacing real relationships. Slowly over the time, I became disconnected from people and completely isolated. During last 10 years, I lived and worked in different countries: UK, US, Germany and now Australia. When I arrived in a new country, I always tried to join social groups, local sport clubs or volunteered in order to meet people and make friends. I ended with transient, short lived relationships. Since I moved abroad alone, I needed support, help and a company of few friends who cared. Every year I got more and more disappointed and depressed. I feel like I can not understand people and make meaningful connections. It looks to me that people around are not interested in meeting, talking or sharing feelings. I dont know how to function normalny. I lost interest in every day life. Since I could not keep my job I had to move to live with my parents. I am now in a small town in the north of Australia. My situation became even worse. There are no job opportunities for me here. I have even less chance to meet people. I struggle every day with loleness and feeling of emptiness. I don't know what to do. Ada1

Autumn_ I’m all alone
  • replies: 4

Hi Everyone, I’m not usually much of a sharer but I don’t know where else to go, so here it goes. I’ve always felt alone in the big blue world and tonight is no exception. Most days, I justify it by telling myself I’m a lone wanderer, but sometimes i... View more

Hi Everyone, I’m not usually much of a sharer but I don’t know where else to go, so here it goes. I’ve always felt alone in the big blue world and tonight is no exception. Most days, I justify it by telling myself I’m a lone wanderer, but sometimes it gets on top of me. I’ve never had many friends. I think I’m too quite. I’ve dated men who seem fabulous but they always end up emotionally abusing me. My most recent relationship (which also seemed the most promising) has just taken a similar turn. I think my dad taught me to accept poor treatment. He is extremely selfish and has left when I was a teenager so he could travel the world. He still messages every so often, but I think it does more harm than good. My relationship with my mum is better but still not great. Despite living out of home for many years, I’m always doing something wrong and I think she complains to others about me when I’m not present. I moved out of home when I was 17 because of my parents and had to grow up very quickly. I’m tired from constantly worrying about money and putting a roof over my head. My only friend and I are growing apart. I find that I support her (she has a range of things going on) but she is never there when I need a shoulder to cry on. I’m at peace with it but I always find my relationships follow this format. I feel really alone and sometimes wonder what the point even is anymore. If life is always going to be more pain than happiness, what’s the point.

Dannos Corona and living with other family
  • replies: 1

I’ve been living at my otters family home with 8 to 9 others . Loving and full functioning family. I have a 1 y.o son with her and a 3 y.o daughter to someone else which I share 50/50 . My parter who I can’t open up to gives no shits about me when I ... View more

I’ve been living at my otters family home with 8 to 9 others . Loving and full functioning family. I have a 1 y.o son with her and a 3 y.o daughter to someone else which I share 50/50 . My parter who I can’t open up to gives no shits about me when I open up. I feel alone, no one to talk to when all I have and everything I gave up for and sacrificed was for my family (son,daughter,parter,her first family and my own) I commit to work family and that has been my routine . When it comes to talking about my feelings my parter blows up. At times like this I can’t see my daughter and she has no idea how that feels like and I think all she cares about is her son and that’s how she sees it as . Her son! That’s not fair

Ocean_explorer I don’t understand why people don’t try to understand
  • replies: 3

Hey, I just really don’t get why people don’t try to understand. I have many things going on in terms of mental and physical health but everyone lives in denial. No one wants to accept the truth. i constantly get told that I’m lazy and selfish and ne... View more

Hey, I just really don’t get why people don’t try to understand. I have many things going on in terms of mental and physical health but everyone lives in denial. No one wants to accept the truth. i constantly get told that I’m lazy and selfish and need to just get on with it. Toughen up, be like everyone else. Make my own way in life. Get real I have 1 person who listens to me and that is my therapist and I have to pay her to listen. I recently asked my family if they would read a book on autism if I gave it to them to read, they said sure of course, they offered to buy the book. But more than 2 months later the book still sits there. Today they couldn’t understand why I’m distressed at the thought of having to do Telehealth with my therapist. They have said if I want a house to live in I have to isolate and not go out , including to medical appointments. Instead of asking why this was distressing or having a discussion about my needs they were aggressive and said if I don’t like it I can move out. no one wants to try and see it from my perspective, no one gives a shit. I wonder if anyone would even bother showing up to my funeral

aussiestorm How much more pain can I suffer? Help
  • replies: 1

I feel like I am losing my mind with the lockdown. I tend to dwell on things too much. The online learning for my child is not really difficult just frustrating. I feel like giving up. My child tells me that I'm the best mum and of course I turn arou... View more

I feel like I am losing my mind with the lockdown. I tend to dwell on things too much. The online learning for my child is not really difficult just frustrating. I feel like giving up. My child tells me that I'm the best mum and of course I turn around and say that I'm not. I have cried myself to sleep only to wake up 10 mins later to think about nothing. I've been put down my whole life so I don't knoww how to get myself out of this dark shadow. My headspace is saying if you didn't wake up would you be missed? I feel that people in my community think that since I'm a SAHM that I am not as important as others. I haven't got sour grapes as I'm doing everything humanely possible to educate my child. He misses the interaction with other children and I've explained to him heaps of times that he can't because of the coronavirus. I need help

Kimella Managing feelings and depression associated with the impacts of COVD19
  • replies: 2

I have always struggled with my mental health. The one thing that was getting me through day to day was our wedding next weekend and European honeymoon. With everything being cancelled and having to push on through with no direct contact or hugs from... View more

I have always struggled with my mental health. The one thing that was getting me through day to day was our wedding next weekend and European honeymoon. With everything being cancelled and having to push on through with no direct contact or hugs from friends has been the toughest thing ever. As our wedding date gets closer, I am finding myself even more depressed and seeking chocolate/unhealthy foods for comfort, which turns into a viscous circle of feeling down about myself. Is anyone else in a similar situation with COVID19 impacts?