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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Paulie_R Crippling anxiety due to work
  • replies: 3

Hi, i am a registered nurse, I completed my degree in 2013 I was meant to be interning throughout 2014 but I interviewed extremely badly due to anxiety and was left without employment in that field for a couple of years. Then at the beginning of this... View more

Hi, i am a registered nurse, I completed my degree in 2013 I was meant to be interning throughout 2014 but I interviewed extremely badly due to anxiety and was left without employment in that field for a couple of years. Then at the beginning of this year (2016) I got a job with a agency (working in new places every shift) I was put into places where I was the most senior staff caring for 60 + aged care residents by myself (some places I was physically assaulted by the resident-understandable because they are confused) then they started sending me to work with a patient who was extremely chronically ill, I ended up losing a lot of weight my hair was falling and I wasn't sleeping, I called them after a month crying saying I won't be able to continue with that patient-they stopped giving me shifts. Then about a month ago my sister-in-law said she will be able to fix me a job in a place that she knows, I was happy about getting a job and some much needed experience. I have since started but I am starting to have the symptoms of losing weight, not sleeping, hair dropping and most of all regret. I love the aspect of caring for people. But I don't like nursing anymore, I can't change professions because my family don't support that decision, also I don't have the finances to do that. And now my sister-in-law is involved, and my stuff ups will come back on her. I feel like I have a lot more pressure on me than I can handle. All my family and colleagues tell me to suck it up, it's not that hard, but it seems to me that I am the only one who realises that if I stuff up someone could be harmed!! Always so scared! I just want to add that the care that I deliver is the best that I am capable of, I triple check everything that I do, but the pressure I feel is overwhelming.

Brokenpeices Distructive thoughts
  • replies: 1

I was laying there hugging my girlfriend when "my voice" popped its nose in once again, and it got me thinking, when I do things my head fills with what I assume are my voices (me) telling myself I am worthless or that what I am doing is wrong, or th... View more

I was laying there hugging my girlfriend when "my voice" popped its nose in once again, and it got me thinking, when I do things my head fills with what I assume are my voices (me) telling myself I am worthless or that what I am doing is wrong, or that someone isn't happy with me, for this example I was hugging my girlfriend, and the voices popped out of nowhere to say that maybe she doesn't want a hug, or I'm annoying her, or she doesn't love me, my head does this all the time, my voice constantly feeding me this negativity and not just one voice but sets of voices like I'm hearing myself 6 times at the same time, I then get anxious and freak out, my body feels weird inside, I'm afraid of what people will think, I don't know why it's happening and I can't control it. I sometimes just wanna scream at myself and tell myself to shut up.

Xavius Overcoming anxiety of answering calls
  • replies: 11

So a few years ago I worked as a technical supervisor in the call centre of company I won't name. Being the piggy in the middle between call centre agents and my manager, I'd get all the angry people. This definitely took its toll on me. It got so ba... View more

So a few years ago I worked as a technical supervisor in the call centre of company I won't name. Being the piggy in the middle between call centre agents and my manager, I'd get all the angry people. This definitely took its toll on me. It got so bad that I quit that job, moved out of town, cancelled my mobile phone contract, deactivated my sim card and of course, severe depression. I didn't have a phone for about 2 years and I absolutely refused to answer any calls. I didn't even answer my ex partners phones when they asked me to take a message. I physically just couldn't do it. To some people it may sound silly, it kinda does though. But still to this day I have lingering effects of it. Although I've progressed and actually have a phone now, I don't answer private numbers or any other numbers I don't know. I don't even make any calls, when I do, it's a short conversation. I don't call unless I really, really, really have to. Was thinking about seeing a hypnotherapist to see if that could help, but I'm a sceptic. Anyone have any tips?

Neaky89 How do you deal with EXTREME anxiety??
  • replies: 3

Hi all, i"m 27 and have had extreme anxiety for a few years now. Every time I feel like I'm getting on top of my symptoms my anxiety monster decides to crank it up a notch and throws in new debilitating physical effects. The question I have is what t... View more

Hi all, i"m 27 and have had extreme anxiety for a few years now. Every time I feel like I'm getting on top of my symptoms my anxiety monster decides to crank it up a notch and throws in new debilitating physical effects. The question I have is what things work for you? How do you or can you simmer down that anxiety monster?? Thank you Neaky89

gloria10 Dealing with difficult people
  • replies: 7

Hi all, I normally work well with most people and as I work through my anxiety I am getting stronger, however there are some people that rattle me and I am stumped with dealing with them. One person at work, who I sometimes have to work closely with,... View more

Hi all, I normally work well with most people and as I work through my anxiety I am getting stronger, however there are some people that rattle me and I am stumped with dealing with them. One person at work, who I sometimes have to work closely with, has been causing me stress. They are bitter, high strung, think the world revolves around them and is very negative. I have tried to see where they are coming from and empathise however I think I moreso feel that I am responsible for their mood as they keep taking their problems out on me. I want to now keep distance as I feel that is my best option, but it also feels like running. Any advice would be appreciated as I feel a bit stuck with this one. Thank you!

A_Bit_Of_A_Pickle Telling Them Again
  • replies: 4

Telling my family how I was feeling for the first time was probably the most difficult thing I have ever done. When i was young I learnt that if I didn't want to get hurt, then I didn't share what I was feeling. I did want to share but the family mem... View more

Telling my family how I was feeling for the first time was probably the most difficult thing I have ever done. When i was young I learnt that if I didn't want to get hurt, then I didn't share what I was feeling. I did want to share but the family member i was closet with had a particular way of shutting me down when ever i expressed how I felt - it always that their problems were worse and that I should try walk a mile in their shoes and then maybe i wouldn't be complaining. This stopped me from opening up to anyone or even letting them see my anxiety and panic attacks for just under 10 years. And to this day I still find it extremely difficult to open up to people about anything, even the smallest thing. i mean this in a very physical sense. My mind goes blank and my throat completely closes over to the point that it becomes hard to breath, and obviously the tears come. It took me twenty minutes during my first meeting with a psychologist to even get out that i had been referred by my doctor for having anxiety. I got over this mostly, and the last year has been one of the best of my life, almost completely anxiety free. But anxiety has me in my grips again and I can't quite bring myself to tell my family or friends again. I feel like I've let them down by succumbing to it again, and i don't want them to be worried or stressed because of me (yes i know they care about me and that this is an illogical thought) . i almost don't want to tell them. But i feel like i'm lying to them by not saying anything and then that makes it worse. I had a bit of a break down tonight about the whole thing (my family was not home), and when they came home I lied and said that I had been reading a book with a sad ending to explain my eyes, and now i feel worse, but they're going on holiday tomorrow, and I don't want them to worry or stress about me while they're on holiday because they haven't had one in so long....I know I'll have to tell them eventually but I just don't know how to without feeling like a failure.

white knight Anxiety?...plan your future.
  • replies: 7

Who would have known? That when first hit with panic attacks, the shakes and racing thoughts- that it would be nearly a generation before most of those symptoms were overcome. We read here a constant stream of anxiety sufferers that some are looking ... View more

Who would have known? That when first hit with panic attacks, the shakes and racing thoughts- that it would be nearly a generation before most of those symptoms were overcome. We read here a constant stream of anxiety sufferers that some are looking for a quick fix. A common theme it seems with anxiety is that we have strong tendencies to think only day to day as we are tied up with coping with our illness so much so we don't think about future plans in tackling the problem. When we are anxious we are less likely to be good money savers, involve our thoughts with family planning or long term studies, its like our endurance is non existent. How then can we tackle anxiety that requires treatment and mental exercises like relaxation classes as well as home exercises when we don't have that drive long term? The mix is important. Medication, therapy, changes in lifestyle and removing toxic people, job swap and a slower calmer living location. But also routine. My therapist in 1987 taught me muscle tensioning exercises. Nearly 30 years later I'm still doing them and throughout that time I've done them prior to sleep...in bed. My anxiety was such that doing them during the day I felt like I was wasting time when I could do other things more important. Such was my thinking...yet those exercises were much more a priority! 20 minutes doing mte's meant I slept better too. I put in place my move to the country. That took a few years with occupation change and land purchase. To keep the mind on par with my plans I regularly visited my block to clear the trees and imagine my home built. Such medium and long range plans and dreams fell into place as time went on. I was able to stop medication in 1999, 12 years after diagnosis and in 2012 I felt I was free of nearly all symptoms. However I still have anxious times that I put down to life itself but remain aware of anxiety returning. We can't ever fully drop our guard with anxiety, as we can't with depression. That's why we need to seek out lifestyle changes and take the view that this illness is serious and won't go away in the short term. To sum up Work closely with your GP Undertake recommended classes and therapy Make positive changes to lifestyle and be decisive with relationships Make medium and long range plans Be positive and accept there is unlikely any quick fix Self discipline, breathing and relaxation exercises must be done. Be kind to yourself. Not too many expectations... Tony WK

V17 Overcoming arachnophobia.
  • replies: 16

I've noticed that I am increasingly becoming more and more arachnophobic. Even writing this post and bringing it to the forefront of my mind is making me edgy. The word spider..uh! Does anyone have any suggestions on how to over come this? The though... View more

I've noticed that I am increasingly becoming more and more arachnophobic. Even writing this post and bringing it to the forefront of my mind is making me edgy. The word spider..uh! Does anyone have any suggestions on how to over come this? The thought of having one on me...Oh. No. Waaaay. Is it because I've been anxious lately that this kinda irrational thought is popping up? I mean I check under the visors in the car before I start driving because I'd rather deal with it then instead of driving. I'm in the garden and the other day I seen a big one and couldn't get back into it [garden]. I really don't want to let this get outta hand and want to nip it in the bud. Any advice would be gratefully received. Except having them on me. V.

DN129 Driving anxiety. Has anyone had any success with this?
  • replies: 6

The initial source of what I'll call my anxiety condition and still the main ailment is driving. It came very suddenly for me around 18 months ago. I was out, driving people around in my car and suddenly got a panic attack when 'stuck' in dense traff... View more

The initial source of what I'll call my anxiety condition and still the main ailment is driving. It came very suddenly for me around 18 months ago. I was out, driving people around in my car and suddenly got a panic attack when 'stuck' in dense traffic at a set of lights. It didn't creep up from there, it was like a switch, before that no driving anxiety, after that can barely drive without getting panic attacks. Over the past 18 months I worked hard to get myself mobile, seemingly expanding my 'range' by a street at a time. Even roads I previously knew, unless I had taught myself I could drive on them with anxiety I got panic attacks. I particularly struggled with traffic lights initially, but seem ok with them now. I can't drive highways, the second I merge onto them I get a massive panic attack, feel like my whole body is going numb and dizzy and have to merge straight off. I spoke to a psychologist about this. They tried to help, but I never felt there was any progress. They kept saying without knowing a real 'cause' of the anxiety its hard the treat and didn't really give me any directions short of build up to it. I've been really frustrated of late. I feel about a month back I made real progress. I was driving more or less freely on all semi-metro and connecting roads without any real anxiety symptoms. But it really seems to be two steps forward, three steps back. Suddenly one day I felt "off", went for a drive, had a panic attack and I feel I've regressed drastically again. I seem to just be able to drive easily within a say, 10km radius of my home. Which is enough for the basics, but not enough for any real freedoms. I'm seriously considering taking anti-depressants to see if they have any effect as I just can't stand not being able to drive freely anymore. Has anyone been through this or has any input? It seems now the entire time I'm driving instead of just driving confidently, I'm 'scanning' the roads for the ability to pull over, like I'll have to do that any second. If I get to a road thats busy, backed up, full of traffic lights, or no space on the side of the road my body freaks out.

V17 Avoidance?
  • replies: 10

Hello, I'm finding that by helping others in the forums the anxiety that I am feeling lessens dramatically, yet I'm concerned I may be using this as a crux to avoid facing the problems I have. Like for instance I feel really teary and can't seem to b... View more

Hello, I'm finding that by helping others in the forums the anxiety that I am feeling lessens dramatically, yet I'm concerned I may be using this as a crux to avoid facing the problems I have. Like for instance I feel really teary and can't seem to be motivated. Do you think taking a break from the forums would be beneficial? I'd welcome your suggestions. V.