Young people

A space for people aged 12-25 to discuss life. If you’re over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect.

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Pinned discussions

romantic_thi3f Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies
  • replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are i... View more

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

Sophie_M NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first
  • replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindfu... View more

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

All discussions

lemonadetears am I the only one who fears my dad will die after I yell at him?
  • replies: 2

when I was 7 my father who works nightshift got into a rather serious car accident. after all, I was just 7, and didn't really understand the brutal nature of what happened. when I was 8 I randomly got reminded of the fact that my father almost died ... View more

when I was 7 my father who works nightshift got into a rather serious car accident. after all, I was just 7, and didn't really understand the brutal nature of what happened. when I was 8 I randomly got reminded of the fact that my father almost died and I became extremely paranoid and pedantic about making sure he knew I loved him i.e. always saying 'good night, love you' before he would leave for work. there's been many times throughout those years since then that I would bawl my eyes out if I didnt get to say goodbye and be drowned in crippling anxiety and overthinking about if he was going to die and then it'd be my fault and that I was a terrible child. im now in my late teens and am currently bawling my eyes out because I had yelled at him and then he left for work without telling me and I didnt get to say my usual farewell message. im so worried he's just going to... die... and he wouldn't know that I loved him. I kind of recognise that my feelings are a bit irrational but I also fear this so so so strongly and genuinely feel like it's all my fault as an inadequate child. is this just me? I feel broken and entirely worthless and useless and again, like an inadequate terrible child. been sobbing for ages now and my mother has been yelling at me to shut up and stop being stupid but I still feel so terrible and it's honestly only made me cry further. I really hope it isn't just me whose thoughts go wild like this. It's kinda like the case of trauma that I never confronted because I wasn't emotionally able to at the time continuously manifesting in my life, usually quite minor but at times able to entirely take me over. I feel so alone.

Baileyjoyce Feeling uneasy and uncomfortable
  • replies: 2

I dont know how to start this other than describing whats happening and how i feel. So im 17 and in my group of friends there are a few people who i feel are toxic and destructive, like theyre participating in under age drinking with high % alcohol, ... View more

I dont know how to start this other than describing whats happening and how i feel. So im 17 and in my group of friends there are a few people who i feel are toxic and destructive, like theyre participating in under age drinking with high % alcohol, saying racial slurs and other activities that make me feel uncomfortable and uneasy, with also the feeling of being unmotivated due to most of the people in the group not studying and not providing much support at all (in yr 12). i guess its accidently rubbing off onto others if you will. these activities are causing me to feel uneasy and uncomfortable, for not only there activities, but seeing innocent people interact with people that they KNOW are toxic makes me feel like i should do something to help. What should i do?I can give more context if needed

LemonJnr Depression and racial discrimination
  • replies: 7

I believe Racial discrimination is a big issue in Australia. It really takes a stab at someone, for being what they cannot control or do not get a choice in from the start of their life. In fact, the idea that someone can be treated differently becau... View more

I believe Racial discrimination is a big issue in Australia. It really takes a stab at someone, for being what they cannot control or do not get a choice in from the start of their life. In fact, the idea that someone can be treated differently because of their race, colour, descent, nationality or ethnic origin is so wrong that I feel I may have mental health issues. It's just unbelievable. I feel that these attitudes are inherent through people who feel threatened in some way and attempt to marginalize these 'different' people from functioning as human beings in society. I feel like I cannot do anything about it because it is a fact that racism does exist, anywhere really. The act can be so subtle that I do not think many who have experienced it have hope of combating such extreme attitudes. I just felt like I needed to share my thoughts because I believe that if I feel that I've experienced it, then there will probably be others out there too who wish to be heard.

jas_mine444 i’m fat and it’s killing me
  • replies: 2

my name is jasmine, i’m 13 going on 14 and i’m severely overweight (side note: this is my first time writing down my feelings so apologies for poor punctuation and/or typos), i have hypothyroidism and due to my depression i was never motivated to do ... View more

my name is jasmine, i’m 13 going on 14 and i’m severely overweight (side note: this is my first time writing down my feelings so apologies for poor punctuation and/or typos), i have hypothyroidism and due to my depression i was never motivated to do anything, i skip my meds…skipping one day of exercise turned to never exercising and the list goes on, my parents are immigrants and they don’t understand anything essentially i’m forced to deal with everything myself, my anxiety and depression and self harm. back to me being overweight… i was always a fat kid, i remember when i was 8 it got so bad that i stopped eating for a period of time, I WAS 8. and when i was 10 i started self harming...i tried everything but nothing would ever work for me, i just gave up, i look at all my friends and all the girls my age and they have such perfect bodies and they can wear what they want and do what they want, in my culture people like to fat shame alotttt and my parents and relatives would constantly fat shame me. i’m fat and i hate it, i honestly don't want to livebecause im a total failure, i just want to look pretty, i want people to look at me and think “she’s beautiful” i want to be confident but im just a loser who rots all day…i hate this and honestly i wish i looked like all the other girls and wear cute clothes and take cute photos and be able to have a special someone and be confident.

candy_21 Feeling upset about results post hsc
  • replies: 4

I’ve been crying nearly everyday about my atar since I got it. It’s not a bad atar and I got into the course I wanted but i still feel incomplete and so angry that it wasn’t what I wanted. I feel upset cause I knew I deserved it and at the same time ... View more

I’ve been crying nearly everyday about my atar since I got it. It’s not a bad atar and I got into the course I wanted but i still feel incomplete and so angry that it wasn’t what I wanted. I feel upset cause I knew I deserved it and at the same time I feel angry at myself for not studying enough. But the truth is I did study, I studied a lot I just lost a lot of my motivation and found it rlly hard to focus and was just so tired all of the time. And since I fell back in maths I couldn’t cope with the new topics that would build on the old ones. I would zone out in tutoring and class and would feel really stressed in tutoring because I thought I couldn’t understand. Recently I’ve been feeling really upset about this number. It wasn’t an atar above 90 but it was rlly close. And that’s what bloody stings. I’m trying to stay positive saying I’ll do better in uni but I’m finding it rlly hard too. If I do well in uni will it really matter that much? Everyone makes such a big deal about atar and everyone respects u if u get a good atar . But when u go to uni if u do well no one rlly cares apart from your employers. No one asks. So is it worth it?

liv_a lonely, sad and paranoid
  • replies: 1

Sometimes I just feel so alone.It’s just my mum, dad and I. Although on my dads side there’s my grandma, but I don’t see her much anymore, we used to be reasonably close but now she lives in a dementia care home and she doesn’t remember much nor do h... View more

Sometimes I just feel so alone.It’s just my mum, dad and I. Although on my dads side there’s my grandma, but I don’t see her much anymore, we used to be reasonably close but now she lives in a dementia care home and she doesn’t remember much nor do her conversation make sense anymore. I don’t know my grandpa because he died before I was born.On my mum’s said there are my other grandparents who died when I was in the early years of primary school. They lived in America and so did my aunty and uncle so I never really saw them though. My family is quite small and sometimes I wish that i had a sibling or someone else. I wouldn’t exactly say I’m friends with my parents but I mean they’re my parents. I’m always getting into arguments with them and I always feel very defensive because if I do something wrong then most times they both scold me and I have no one to at least talk to. I find it’s hard and if I had a better relationship with my parents maybe it would be easier. I know it could be a whole lot worse. But so many times feel so alone. I can be triggered or get upset reasonably quickly and now days my parents may try once or twice to try and understand what’s going on but I always push them away. Deep down all I want is a hug and someone to talk to but when upset I always resort do sending them away and they don’t come back. I keep telling myself to stop but every time it’s the same: I push them away. They don’t come back. I cry until my eyes are dry or I dwell in my sorrows. And then, by then I have given up hope that they would come back to comfort me and I pick myself up and try to get on with my day. I know I not a perfect child and Im always upset with my parents but I still love them and I know it’s just my paranoia but I always have the same thought looming over my head and it’s that what if one day I get into a fight and then that is the last words I say to them. My parents had me at quite an old age. I’m 14 and they are in there late 50’s nearly going into their 60’s. I am constantly sacred that something will happen to them and that they won’t be there to see my life unfold, and that I need to do everything as soon as possible when I become an adult, like:get married, have kids so they can see it all happen. I’m scared that’s I’ll lose them. AndAnd everyday the weight crushes me more and more. I don’t know what to do.

itskate I hate living with my in-laws
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I’m stuck in a depressing situation and I can’t get out. I got married 5 yrs ago when I was 20 yrs old with my husband who was 24. I was expected to move in with my in-laws after marriage. I couldn’t wait to leave my parents house (their hous... View more

Hi all, I’m stuck in a depressing situation and I can’t get out. I got married 5 yrs ago when I was 20 yrs old with my husband who was 24. I was expected to move in with my in-laws after marriage. I couldn’t wait to leave my parents house (their house is very extremely dirty and gross) they even had a pest control guy come in and say it’s the filthiest house he’s ever seen. There’s cockroach everywhere. Once I moved in with my in-laws they were okay but my brother in law was really annoying and pervy and he would start arguments with my husband and even bashed him once over a car tyre because he wanted it back after I paid him to buy it off him. Mind you we gave him the tyre next day and didn’t ask for the money. mind you my brother inlaw was around 40 yrs when my husband and I first got married. my husband and I moved out from my in laws last year and unfortunately due to the rise in cost of living we couldn’t afford to stay out. My BIL recently had gotten married and he had moved out. Then my MIL and FIL a asked us to move back in which we did. Once we moved in, my BIL and his wife told my MIL and FIL they were going to move in too! My BIL and his wife are horrible to live with. They curse us everyday (I hear him mumble that he hopes we lose our jobs and bust). Now the house is in chaos and my in laws and everyone is always arguing. I try to stay out of it but it really affects me mentally and emotionally. My BILs wife tries to compete with me all the time. either my BIL or FIL is always complaining about silly things like why my car is in the garage (when it’s parked outside on another street) or why the cutlery/ crockery is so bad (I bought most of the stuff they’re using). My FIL complains about why I cook inside and makes me cook outside which I follow his instructions. He makes it difficult for me to cook and when I buy take away he says it’s not good. My BIL and his wife try to suck up to my in laws and intervene within every conversation. I don’t want to live here anymore but we both work full time and still can’t afford to move out. I don’t know if I should just move in back with my parents and just deal with the cockroach problem.

Elise_85 I’m failing uni and I don’t know what to do
  • replies: 1

Hi everyon! This is my first post here and i’m kinda nervous but I’m also extremely stressed. For years I thought I wanted to get into childcare, and this year I started my university course for it. I have always loved children and I’m always more th... View more

Hi everyon! This is my first post here and i’m kinda nervous but I’m also extremely stressed. For years I thought I wanted to get into childcare, and this year I started my university course for it. I have always loved children and I’m always more than happy to help out with them. At first I was really enjoying the university course, however later in the year things got quite difficult. My boyfriend was diagnosed with cancer which was a huge shock and completely crushed me. My mother had a surgery with 6-12 week recovery time, which meant I really had to step up and help my dad and brother around the house. Caring for my boyfriend, helping my mum and trying to stay on top of the piles of uni work really got to me. I ended up going back into anti-anxiety meds and although both my boyfriend and mother are doing better now, I’m so far behind with uni. Technically I only have 3 days left to submit all my work, some which i haven’t started and I honestly don’t think I can do it. I’m starting to think childcare might not be my passion anymore, but I don’t know if that’s just because I feel so overwhelmed with everything. I don’t want to disappoint my parents or myself but I have never felt this unsure and overwhelmed before. any advice would be very appreciated thank you!

ocean-man freaking out right now
  • replies: 1

I'm writing here because I need to get stuff out there and don't know who to call and one way or another I'd slip up and just make everything so much worse for me. I'm going through a massive freakout and I don't know how I should even refer to it (m... View more

I'm writing here because I need to get stuff out there and don't know who to call and one way or another I'd slip up and just make everything so much worse for me. I'm going through a massive freakout and I don't know how I should even refer to it (mental breakdown? panic attack? anxiety attack?). I've been hit by this massive wave of negative thoughts and it's gotten so bad that I've been physically shaking and twitching (never experienced this before) and have been unable to go to sleep. All of them detailing my shortcomings as a friend, a worker, a creator, a person in general. My poor social skills, poor temper, thoughtlessness, carelessness, laziness, this, that, everything in between. All of my incompetencies, mistakes and examples of poor performance wrapped up into one meat, nauseating package. Even just writing this out I feel like garbage because I feel like whatever it is I'm going through or experiencing right now is just karma for all the things I've unwittingly done to people as a result of my idiocy. Furthermore I know there's people out there so much worse off than me and I feel as if I'm not doing anything that warrants sympathy in regards to that. I'm struggling to even articulate my thoughts at the moment because my brain is going 8000 miles an hour and it wants to slip something new into this post every half a second or so. Leaving it here. I just hope this is clear enough. I don't really know what I want to get out of this. I think I just need a little void to scream into right now

TBear5879 giving up
  • replies: 4

Hi, I'm just here to vent. I have autism and ADHD and would like to be tested for depression so yeah, not a great start to life for me. As well as the fact that I don't really want a life anymore. I don't necessarily want to die I just want the pain ... View more

Hi, I'm just here to vent. I have autism and ADHD and would like to be tested for depression so yeah, not a great start to life for me. As well as the fact that I don't really want a life anymore. I don't necessarily want to die I just want the pain to go away. I feel like during the day I can be so happy and everyone says I'm doing great and that I'm always so happy but I know it's a fake smile even though I really wish it wasn't. Then at night I just get hit with a wave of sadness but sometimes it's not even sadness it's just numb I feel so emotionless in the worst way possible. my whole life I've been taught to understand and know my emotions but this, this is just a lost, sad, angry... Numbness. I don't know what to do anymore I want to be happy, I really do but I can't. I tell all my friends and family that I'm happy. That I'm okay, but I just feel like I'm dying inside. Everything is just so hard. My whole body aches. Every mucel in my brain is telling to give up, begging me to give up. My mouth is screaming at me to stop smiling. The ocean of tears is threatening to pore out from behind my eyes. I just want to give up. Make the pain go away. I don't know... At this point I just don't know, I don't know what to do. I don't know who I am, I don't know how to be happy. I just don't know. Please if anyone feels like this please tell me I want to know I'm not alone. If you feel like this know that I will listen to you and not just listen I will actually hear you. I'm here for you. You're amazing! You've got this!