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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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1468 My Depression
  • replies: 2

I am 15 and currently in high school and feel like i'm one of the nicest people I know, always willing to give for no reason to friends and even strangers. I have a friend group that I was close with but now I just feel used and hated.I feel like I a... View more

I am 15 and currently in high school and feel like i'm one of the nicest people I know, always willing to give for no reason to friends and even strangers. I have a friend group that I was close with but now I just feel used and hated.I feel like I am the least valued person in my friend group. One main reason is that every time it's someone's birthday, the whole group piles money to get a gift for the birthday person, however I was the only one who hasn't received anything. I know that it sounds very insignificant but the fact that they didn't even bother getting me a present hurts me to no end. I am very shy and don't like talking to people, I prefer sitting at my desk playing my games. Up until recently I would always play with someone but now i'm just sitting alone staring at the screen waiting for someone to get on. I don't seem to find joy in anything I do anymore and feeling extremely depressed, I know that if i just went out more I could have more friends and solve everything but I was never that kind of person. I recently broke up with my girlfriend who has a short temper and very few interests and who didn't seem to try in the relationship while I did everything for her, paying for most of the things that we bought and offering to do all the work while I told her to go relax. I didn't really mind it until she suddenly said she wanted to break up one day, saying I became boring and that i'm not boyfriend material, that i'm too short and skinny compared to her. I was heart-broken and shattered. In the entire relationship I was the one saying sorry even though I was sure I was in the right. I lost many of my other friends when she complained that I wasn't giving her my full attention. When she was going through severe depression, I was always the one to listen and understand, coercing her that i'll be there always. While whenever she was in a bad mood she always just ended up getting mad at me for no reason and I would sit there and take it all in. I remember once we had an argument because she heard a rumour about me two-timing her. I clearly did not and managed got everyone that we both knew to confirm it, she ignored everyone and was extremely unreasonable, only selectively listening to people who were on her side. The past aside I want to know what i'm doing wrong. Like why am I the one who gets teased most by my friends as well? I apologise if my post doesn't make much sense, I can't really think straight right now and on the verge of crying

SarahLulu Severe School Stress; How to cope???
  • replies: 5

Hi everyone, Lately ive been having really bad stress associated with many things but mainly school. And then when I seem to get a top of things I get a bad SAC score and I get really burned out and give up. Im doing VCE units 1 and 2 and one unit 3 ... View more

Hi everyone, Lately ive been having really bad stress associated with many things but mainly school. And then when I seem to get a top of things I get a bad SAC score and I get really burned out and give up. Im doing VCE units 1 and 2 and one unit 3 and 4 subject. I'm not sure how to cope with the stress. My depression is sort of under control and my thoughts are too but Im scared if I keep going at this rate then Ill spiral into a depressive episode. I'm not sure how to cope, other than just keep studying and just accept that its not the end of the world. Any tips??? Sarah

Door Returning depression
  • replies: 3

Hey everyone, Over the last few years, ive sunken into a deep, seemingly never ending depression. As im sure most of u know, many years of "friends" constantly telling u that ur worthless, that u should shut up cos no one cares about u, and to go kil... View more

Hey everyone, Over the last few years, ive sunken into a deep, seemingly never ending depression. As im sure most of u know, many years of "friends" constantly telling u that ur worthless, that u should shut up cos no one cares about u, and to go kill yourself (no im not considering it) really sets in some poor self beliefs, and i have been dealing with depression for at least 1 year before now, probably longer. After suffering from panic attacks, i started to see someone and to talk about my problems, which i did. I solved most of my conflicts at school, of course there were still people that seemed to have made it their life goal to put me down no matter the cost, but from some stroke of luck my parents lost work and we had to move. I have integrated into my new school well, and most breaks are spent with seemingly decent new friends. After talking with a psychologist for multiple months, it seemed everything was just about resolved, and i had methods to help me cope if i did feel down at any point in the future. I stopped seeing them about 6 months ago, and only moved schools at the start of this year. But the depression has come back as bad, if not worse, with anxiety far worse then before, that seriously affects my eating and sleeping habits. The thing is that i have no idea what could be causing this, while moving to a new school was stressful, everything worked out really well really quick. My home life is fine, my social life with friends is fine, my grades are great, and the anxiety and depression doesnt seem focused anymore, just a general cloud that hangs over me daily. I do not see anything in my life that i can confront and deal with to help fix this now, or prevent it from happening again in the future. I dont see it stopping, i am in a point in my life where i am happier than ever, yet i am more depressed and anxious and stressed. While everyone in my life right now is nice to me, i still am extremely fearful of social interactions, even talking to my new friends causes my hands to sweat, and i find my heart rate and body temperature skyrocketting constantly, but how can i stop myself from being nervous about talking to people? I will be talking to another psychologist soon, but for now would like some other perspectives. Sorry for the long post (this also, i say sorry heaps where it seems i shouldnt, unless this post is actually too long, in which case sorry) Regards, Blanket

Vivius_fantasia Opinions are needed!
  • replies: 3

Hello, I'm here to talk about an issue I thought I must've broken out of before - but clearly haven't. My first term of Year 10 were great, I was doing an Accelerated course in science and was the topping both my year 10 classmates and year 11 peers ... View more

Hello, I'm here to talk about an issue I thought I must've broken out of before - but clearly haven't. My first term of Year 10 were great, I was doing an Accelerated course in science and was the topping both my year 10 classmates and year 11 peers in the higher grade. However there has been a problem, that's been happening since my first ever official exam in high school. My study pattern was non-existent. I didn't need to study for a test at all and could still get way above 80%, assignments were also a bit of a factor as I was a huge procrastinator and refused to do them until the last minute. Ever since my second term of Year 10 I began to sort of...burn out, my parents had warned me about this and said I was lucky enough it didn't happen to me in my HSC years. I still topped most of my classes (except math, I had a really rude teacher for that subject), including Accelerated Prelim. I just barely managed to hold my own during this period, and though I would light back up in Year 11. Now I am in Year 11, and the only thing that has changed is my improvement in class work. I should also mention that I am an artist, and am also adapt in areas such as film editing. I love art, drawing crazy characters, making wild stories and letting my imagination flow free. However, now it is replaced with a constant headache - every-time I try to work, regardless if it is art or science, I cannot seem to wrap my head around it. It's getting harder and harder for me think properly, I can only really focus at school - and I am beginning to panic. If I don't get over this stupid burnout I'm going to fall - and NO this isn't trying to live up to everyone's expectations. I never gave damn about the expectations of society and others, except those who are close to me (like my parents, who are trying to help me as best as they can). If my grades drop, I don't get the results that I want and need - I don't know what to do. I've set expectations for myself, and I know I can reach them. The problem is I don't understand why it's so hard to get moving. I need to understand something to do anything about it, that's how I work. I know there is something wrong. If I am giving up on art, when it's the one thing that I love the most above all, the one thing nobody has stopped me from doing. I just need peoples opinions about this situation, please it's been happening for nearly a year now. If I become an adult like this, then I sure know that my future isn't going to be happy

Kath_ Struggling with socialising
  • replies: 3

Hi everyone, this is my first time posting here but could really use some advice. I'm a generally shy, introverted person but these days I have been really struggling with socialising with people. Whenever I am in a social situation, I cannot come up... View more

Hi everyone, this is my first time posting here but could really use some advice. I'm a generally shy, introverted person but these days I have been really struggling with socialising with people. Whenever I am in a social situation, I cannot come up with anything to say to people. My mind goes blank and I don't make an effort at all to speak to people. I'm not afraid, but I just don't have anything to say. I often feel stares because I don't really react to things or try to continue the conversation with people and I usually make things awkward with my quietness. It's becoming a real problem, because of how much the things in my life depend on me being social and talkative. I worry that because of this problem of me coming off as someone who doesn't talk, I will lose important opportunities and possibly my job (I work in retail). Plus, I get graded on participation for my classes at uni. I also don't have many friends, but with the ones I do have, we hang out often. I feel like every time I hang out with them, I can never speak up about things going on in my life. It's like it just doesn't want to come out of me. Usually all I really do is listen to my friends' conversations while I make a small comment here and there. I feel like it's very difficult to make new friends as well, because even if someone is trying to be friendly with me, I just don't know what to say and I end up feeling really bad afterwards. I just want to be able to express myself as well as I do with writing. It's disappointing that I feel like the person that goes out in the world to these social situations isn't the real me. So if anyone has advice on how to become more sociable, please let me know!

September Dealing with Loneliness
  • replies: 6

Hi! So this'll be my first post, and I'm just looking for some advice. Thanks for taking the time to read this. So, just some background; I'm 16 y/o and currently going through Year 12 (and the studying is already killing me, as is expected). While I... View more

Hi! So this'll be my first post, and I'm just looking for some advice. Thanks for taking the time to read this. So, just some background; I'm 16 y/o and currently going through Year 12 (and the studying is already killing me, as is expected). While I haven't been diagnosed by a professional yet my mum suspects I have some form of depression and/or anxiety (as she has both as well as bipolar disorder, and says I show the symptoms). Probably my biggest issue at the moment is that I don't really have any friends, and I can't seem to make any. Last year I moved schools along with housing due to legal troubles with my family. Due to this I also lost contact with all of my old friends (aside from the occasional "hey, check this out" on Snapchat). I never really managed to make any friends at my new school, and even online I've had no luck making friends. I'm very shy in-person, but I also suffer from the most horrifying personality trait of all; I'm a complete bore. I can never find the right words, or carry a conversation, even in subjects I'm interested or knowledgeable in. For some odd reason, I've managed to find two friends in the past year in the weirdest places (a random chat room on a dumb site and an unpopular social media app), both girls around my age in Australia (different cities, unfortunately). Both eventually turned romantic, and a little after that nonexistent. Nowadays I have no one to talk to. So asides from the lingering self-loathing from the above breakups as well as literally every other feeling that depression and loneliness entails, I'm pretty much a wreck at the moment. I'm failing my schoolwork (if I can even bother to show up to school half the days), my home life is unbearable (and I have nowhere to go to escape it) and I'm steadily becoming more and more empty and, what's really distressing to me, angry. I've talked about visiting a professional to chat to with my mum, but there's numerous problems with that; I'm worried about the cost/travel (the place is a few suburbs away) and I've had issues with professionals in the past (most notably me being unable to be honest and open with them). I have a myriad of other issues that I'm currently dealing with (although to call them "issues" makes me feel somewhat like ... well, a pussy), but this is the most pressing in my opinion. Wow, this was long. Thank you so much for even listening to what I have to say, it means so much to me.

SarahLulu Diagnosed with BPD what does this mean?
  • replies: 2

Hi guys, today I went and saw a new psychiatrist I told her my history and she asked about my childhood etc. Towards the end she started talking about personality disorders and said that because I'm 18 can't officially diagnose me but I fit the diagn... View more

Hi guys, today I went and saw a new psychiatrist I told her my history and she asked about my childhood etc. Towards the end she started talking about personality disorders and said that because I'm 18 can't officially diagnose me but I fit the diagnostic criteria (I also have depression and anxiety). She wrote it down and told me to research it a bit. When I called my mum and told her she was like in denial nup you don't have that I want to talk to the psychiatrist. Everytime someone comes in the hospital (shes a nurse) with BPD all the nurses go oh here we go, they are all attention seekers. I said to her I havent done anything for attention! I reasoned with her a bit and she did her own research and spoke to the psychiatrist at work. I'm not sure what it means - I only no of the stigma attached to it. I don't know how to feel and react even though it explains my previous impulsive suicidal behaviour. Mum's telling me everyone with BPD are manipulative and attention seekers. I didn't fully understand BPD myself and thought that people with borderline were a bit manipulative. But I'm not. There's a lack of education surronding mental illness and I feel like depression is slowly getting accepted, however BPD it scares me to be associated with it. It saddens me that the world is like this.

achlys lonely when i'm in a crowd
  • replies: 3

hi, this year my friend and i have integrated into this larger group. i really have never been one for groups larger than three or four, because i prefer that one-on-one interaction. my friend, however, fits in perfectly in this group which on some d... View more

hi, this year my friend and i have integrated into this larger group. i really have never been one for groups larger than three or four, because i prefer that one-on-one interaction. my friend, however, fits in perfectly in this group which on some days has an upwards of ten people. even when i'm surrounded by all these people, and my friend, i feel so lonely and that (excuse the cliche) no-one gets me. they're all loud boisterous people, but i feel like a shy introverted black sheep. they don't have the same interests as me, and our personalities, while they don't clash, don't click either. i want to find like-minded people to sit with, or just sit with a smaller group, but i don't want to leave the only person i like either. is this something i just have to tolerate until high school ends and i can break off into the real world and find my people? is there anything i can do? thank you - lilly

baet123 How to deal with people close to you who support you yet put you down at the same time?
  • replies: 4

Hey guys, I am 24 years old I suffer from depression and anxiety. I take medication and see a psychiatrist. Does any one from their experience have advice for someone like me who is or has been consitently every day on multiple occasions be put down ... View more

Hey guys, I am 24 years old I suffer from depression and anxiety. I take medication and see a psychiatrist. Does any one from their experience have advice for someone like me who is or has been consitently every day on multiple occasions be put down and made to feel like excuse my french "shit" or "worthless"? I am working part time and a full time uni student. My father treats me like shit and puts me down regarding my weight. Whenever he barks at me and lectures me about how my weight is holding me back it makes me feel like shit and like I am a failure. I am sort of financially dependent on him as rent and general living costs is so expensive so I cannot afford to move out of home? I am not suicidal or anything of this nature but I feel like the only thing he talks to me about is my weight and I feel like crap all the time because of it. All and any advice would be appreciated. Thanks guys.

Mousey22 Slept with a girl, she doesn't want to see me again
  • replies: 5

Hi guys, just going to jump in with this so here goes. I'm 22 by the way. and please excuse.typos, I am on my phone. I slept with a girl I met online this past weekend, she is from different city so I got a train to see her. I thought no biggie, I'll... View more

Hi guys, just going to jump in with this so here goes. I'm 22 by the way. and please excuse.typos, I am on my phone. I slept with a girl I met online this past weekend, she is from different city so I got a train to see her. I thought no biggie, I'll just do it and leave the next morning. but it didn't turn out.like I.thought it would. She was so nice and welcoming, We actually talked about a.lot of personal things and held each other so closely, I remember lying next to her with my arm over her body and my hand on top of hers, and it felt so good to feel this again, as my last serious relationship was 6 years ago. She told me she sleeps around a lot and she wanted to keep seeing my regularly, but when morning came she was distant and her personality changed, like she didn't want me there anymore. I know it sounds stupid but I got home and had such weird feelings for her. I text her earlier tonight and told her that it felt great being with her she just said good to see you too, so I get the hint. It's my own stupid fault really because when people show me any kind of affection I get hung up on them emotionally, which I think is insecure. I just feel terrible at the moment, like real bad in my chest and mind. After trying dating and websites trying to meet someone, after having no one for 6 years someone sleeps with me and I can't help getting feelings for them, like as soon as I wake up, for the past four days I have checked my phone to see that little light to see if she text me. I don't know what is wrong with me, I work full time and currently studying a certificate as well, I work out every day and I try to be.nice and considerate of people, I dress well even to go to the shops. but I feel like there is something hanging over me, like there will always be something wrong with me and no one will love me and stay with me. my last girlfriend cheated with my best mate but it doesn't stop me trusting people, I think I just need to be wanted by someone. I'm glad I was on my own at work tonight, because I couldn't stop having tears. I don't know why I get so attached. and I can't talk to family because they will make fun of my sadness or use it against me later on. The only thing helping me right now is listening to Reach by The Butterfly Effect, the lyrics just make me feel.something right now. I just feel soterrible stupI'd and lonely. sorry for posting such a pathetic story.