Welcome and orientation

Welcome! If you’re not sure where to start, that’s OK. We’re keen to know more about you and what you’re looking for on our Forums.

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Pinned discussions

Aaronsis HELP..Am I posting in the right section?
  • replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried th... View more

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

Chris_B Introducing...the community champions
  • replies: 22

Hi everyone, Some of you may have noticed that a few of our members are labelled ‘Community champion’ and have a beyondblue National Roadshow bus badge, like this: This thread explains who these members are and what they do. Community champions are v... View more

Hi everyone, Some of you may have noticed that a few of our members are labelled ‘Community champion’ and have a beyondblue National Roadshow bus badge, like this: This thread explains who these members are and what they do. Community champions are volunteers within the forums who: Have the time, skills and empathy to support other members Make an effort to welcome new members Are regularly and actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community as a place of hope and recovery. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! As this is a peer support community that includes members under the age of 18, it is important that we ensure our peer support community leaders have a current 'working with children' check as part of due diligence. In an online environment with anonymous posters, it also provides Beyond Blue (and the community) with some security as to the identity of who is posting as a community champion. We ask our community champions to spend at least 2-3 hours a week posting and responding in the forums, but in reality they go far above and beyond this. Like me, they’re not psychologists or counsellors, just regular folk like yourselves who have experience with anxiety and depression. I’ll leave it to our champion volunteers to reply below and let you know a bit about themselves. PS. If this is your first time on the forums and you'd like to introduce yourself, please start a new thread rather than replying in here.

All discussions

Be_Who_You_Are New to this Forum
  • replies: 4

Hi Everyone I am Amanda and I suffer from Social Anxiety. I am tired of suffering alone and no-one understands how I am feeling. I just want to connect with people who feel the same.

Hi Everyone I am Amanda and I suffer from Social Anxiety. I am tired of suffering alone and no-one understands how I am feeling. I just want to connect with people who feel the same.

MainlyG Middle aged male from country Vic
  • replies: 4

Hi all...an introduction firstly. I am 39 and have been living in regional Vic after moving from Melbourne 12 years ago. Like all. The last 24 months have been tough, well it's only really hit me the last 6 to 9 months I guess. The last 3 months have... View more

Hi all...an introduction firstly. I am 39 and have been living in regional Vic after moving from Melbourne 12 years ago. Like all. The last 24 months have been tough, well it's only really hit me the last 6 to 9 months I guess. The last 3 months have been toughest, with me accepting I may have anxiety (first time). With that has come physical issues that have affected my way of life. I'm 39, feeling 69 at the moment, but better than where I was 2 months ago, where I felt 89!

Broken_and_binned_ My head won’t stop spinning!
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone I am really lost in life and thought I might be able to gain some support, understanding and just help really 路‍

Hi everyone I am really lost in life and thought I might be able to gain some support, understanding and just help really 🤷‍

Cool_Change A difficult place to begin
  • replies: 6

Just today I have turned to Beyond Blue, and I'm embarrassed and distressed to admit to be in this situation. At 66 years of age, I'm living in a constant state of depression, anxiety and lack of confidence. It has gradually gripped me over a period ... View more

Just today I have turned to Beyond Blue, and I'm embarrassed and distressed to admit to be in this situation. At 66 years of age, I'm living in a constant state of depression, anxiety and lack of confidence. It has gradually gripped me over a period of many years. This has to stop, and get my happiness and confidence back. I'm at the top of my game in my professional career, but my personal and family life is destructing. I am unhappy in my marriage. Don't get on with my in-laws ... they are self centred and judgmental. Have lost most friendships. Have lost the connection to many important family members. People can pick up on this lack of confidence in me, and often I find myself in a position of having to defend how and why I do things, or otherwise this opens the door to be over ruled. This agitates me. I have just one close & valued friend who is important to me, but whom is not respected by the rest of my family. I can't allow things to get to the stage of losing this person. I have 2 grown-up children (and who have their own children). My daughter is supportive of me, however my son has no contact with me. This is not the way that I expected my life to be at. Not at this stage of my life.

Raeth666 New here. Stuck in place.
  • replies: 10

Hi I'm new. Always decide not to continue when starting to make the account until today. I'm really not sure if I should waste peoples time with me tbh. I'm mid thirties. Have a job and a wife, its more than a lot have. I'm just stuck at that, my Job... View more

Hi I'm new. Always decide not to continue when starting to make the account until today. I'm really not sure if I should waste peoples time with me tbh. I'm mid thirties. Have a job and a wife, its more than a lot have. I'm just stuck at that, my Job is unfulfilling, and I'm stuck in the same role I've been in for 6 years. I've tried to study to get certifications to get higher, but my ADHD is screwing that up. I'd love to be able to go to a psychiatrist to get put onto stimulant medication as it worked for me when i was younger, but money makes that impossible. I pay almost half my pay on rent, the rest goes to bills and shopping. I make too much for my wife to get unemployment, however she's unable to work, but centrelink doesn't agree. 100% of my fortnightly paycheck is gone by the end of the first week. I've got no wriggle room for saving. So i can't afford to go to a psychiatrist, to get the medication, to help me study to improve my skills and get a certification, to get the higher pay to afford the psychiatrist... see the cycle? All of this has been weighing on me for about 3-4 years, and my mind is at breaking point. I've completely lost my motivation to do anything, and I'm not talented enough to really do any form of side hustle. The thoughts of not wanting to be here anymore are getting louder and louder. Putting on the mask is wearing me thinner and thinner. My wife has severe depression and anxiety, so i can't afford to let the façade slip even for a moment as when I do she zooms in on it, and won't let up. If i do share how down I am, she tries to "fix" it, and when that inevitably fails she's sent into a spiral of depression, and her anxiety flares up to the point she starts hyperventilating due to my father committing suicide 7 years ago. Add to this I don't feel wanted or respected at all at work plus it's now fulltime remote work, I have 1 single friend who's very busy all the time, a few online friends that are rarely around, my inability to make friends as i generally don't fit into any particular group, and my applying for new jobs has had zero progress... Basically i Know there's thousands of people in so much worse positions to me, and i don't really feel like I "Qualify" for any real help. I just don't know what to do anymore.

G50_ 52, lost and alone.
  • replies: 3

I am 52 (how did that happen?!). After a promising start, I seem to be have placed myself in a perfect depressive storm. I missed the boat, every boat and very much left myself behind. I am not married. Have no kids, not even a pet. I just returned f... View more

I am 52 (how did that happen?!). After a promising start, I seem to be have placed myself in a perfect depressive storm. I missed the boat, every boat and very much left myself behind. I am not married. Have no kids, not even a pet. I just returned from overseas and have not worked for 5 years (self-confidence has me unravelling during interviews and I have ben out of the job market for 5 years and now that I'm 52). But I won't find work until I fix myself (and then of course I'll come across ageism) I am usually the one who props people up with messages of encouragement etc. So dear councillors, thanks but it's not what I'm after at the moment. I'D LOVE TO HEAR HOW OTHER 50+ WITHOUT FAMILY OR FRIENDS THEY COULD TURN TO APPROACHED THE ISSUE: I am part of that group who were / are too proud to admit that my life is not ok. It is in fact tter crap and I have noone to tell without burdening them. I've now reached the self-neglect stage, which only precipitates the downhill roll. I'd love to hear stories of other 50+ people who were / are alone and need solutions. I feel all Mental Health efforts are going out to "the young ones" and society has forgotten about the 50+ .... those who grew up in a world when one did not talk about mental health and hence never had it addressed and are now in their 50s and still "unfixed." How do you find a professional to talk to? How do you start to unpick the knotted mess that is my mind to start trying to find a clear way to explain this feeling of emptiness and failure? Thank you!

StorminaTeacup newbie, struggling with biz managment and drinking
  • replies: 2

HI, I rang BB on Monday. The first time I have ever called an online counsellor. Im glad I did. I went from feeling really low to a bit more realistic and with 1-2 small actions to undertake this week, that gave me a small plan and a reason to get of... View more

HI, I rang BB on Monday. The first time I have ever called an online counsellor. Im glad I did. I went from feeling really low to a bit more realistic and with 1-2 small actions to undertake this week, that gave me a small plan and a reason to get off the couch. Part of my problem is a drink too much. I have nights I don't drink and I feel optimistic and open-minded the next day, conversely days after drinking, I'm slow, tired, irritated, solemn, woeful, gloomy and so on. Im tired of the Jessy-Hyde (Jekyl) rollar coaster. I decided on Monday to start to write a book about my drinking and what works to have nights off. Just writing this down has been enormously helpful. So Ill keep going with that. I also took 2 "mental health days" off from my business (yesterday and today). I found it really draining having the responsibility of 8 employees, and the lack of time for myself. Im glad I've taken these 2 days for ME! I found on BB a new Small Business Owner counselling course, so Ive signed up. I haven't for confirmation yet, but I think that will be helpful to share biz worries with a counsellor. cheers.

No_nickname I just feel Done
  • replies: 3

Hi, First time posting here, and I just wanted to get something off my chest, or maybe out of my heart. I feel like there is not really anyone in my life to tell them what I really feel. There is the making my parents worry, my husband who will tell ... View more

Hi, First time posting here, and I just wanted to get something off my chest, or maybe out of my heart. I feel like there is not really anyone in my life to tell them what I really feel. There is the making my parents worry, my husband who will tell me He understands and make it about him, and if He doesn’t do that, He will tell me how to fix it. I don’t feel I have really close friends, and with out getting into it. I guess I just feel they don’t care, or have their own issues and don’t need mine. Anyway, I just feel done with it all, Covid, my job, my direct client, my manager, my employees, the bullshit the pops up all the time, having to tell grown ass me to put on a face mask, the lies, the people who think your stupid. Just everything. I am sick of reading to much in to things, of feeling more other people then I will ever mean to them. Of getting anxious when dealing with people but having to act like nothing affects me. Of feeling ugly and never pretty or good enough or smart enough. Of never being enough. And knowing that the problem is me, in my head or being aware of it but unable to just stop. I am sick of being afraid to go after what I want, to apply for other jobs, to change my relationship. To ask those friends what I truely mean to them. And why the hell am I afraid, things don’t work out in life, it’s not the end of the world and people can never say anything worse then what I say to myself. So yeah, I just feel done thanks for letting me get that out.

JayneAnne1991 Nervous newbie
  • replies: 3

Hello everyone I’m new here not sure how everything works but I’m a married mother of two girls both under 10 challenging anxiety and depression every day

Hello everyone I’m new here not sure how everything works but I’m a married mother of two girls both under 10 challenging anxiety and depression every day

jas200 I’m new and very nervous
  • replies: 4

Hi im jas, the past year has been very difficult for me and i have really struggled in reaching out to my friends and family for help in terms of my mental health. If anyone has tips or advice for asking loved ones for help even if you don’t understa... View more

Hi im jas, the past year has been very difficult for me and i have really struggled in reaching out to my friends and family for help in terms of my mental health. If anyone has tips or advice for asking loved ones for help even if you don’t understand what your going through it would be much appreciated. Thanks