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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Hello out there!

replies: 11

Hello, I've never done anything like this before. I am a very private person and quite self-conscious even though people say that I am confident and even a bit brash. Like a lot of people, I guess, I project my professional persona in public and shield myself from harm or criticism by hiding my true self. Nothing nefarious, just a protective instinct born from life-long criticism from parents and siblings and high expectations of perfection and competitiveness. I have been subjected to bullying, harassment, threats (both physical and psychological) death threats and home invasions over the last twenty -odd years. My wife and I have moved home four times in the last ten years to try to get away from crazy neighbours (I know it sounds like a problem with me but I/we have been very unlucky). Currently, I am being targeted by a narcissistic, passive-aggressive, antagonistic bully who constantly watches me and provokes me to try to get a reaction so they can report me to the police because they are convinced that I am a criminal even though I have repeatedly advised them that I am a very well qualified professional with no criminal record and multiple security clearances. I have been working with my psychologist for PTSD, anxiety and mild acrophobia for many years. I get to a good place but then something will trigger me and I regress. I just want to find peace and I want to be left alone. The police can't help me because the actions of my insane neighbour are "not serious enough" or "not a criminal offence". My wife and I have communicated with the neighbour but they will not stop. I don't have any close friends and I find it hard to make friends as I find small talk difficult and end up giving people a resume of my achievements rather than being relaxed and open. I am afraid that I am not interesting enough. Obviously, my wife loves me, understands and accepts me. I want to make friends though. I love History and Literature. I built plastic models as a hobby. I love gardening and being outdoors. I grew up on farms and I am a first-generation Australian as my parents both immigrated as children. Anyone who has dealt with this type of person can you please help with what worked for you. Thankyou kindly.

AnimalLover2

replies: 14

Hello I’ve been trying to post for over a month. I have registered and tried to reset my password many times with no luck. Also I cannot find where to “reply” to any of the conversations…… can someone please help me?

Looking for your words of encouragement and support

replies: 19

Hello. He was a nice guy but I thought he had issues and a lot of bad luck. He’d had a lot of bad relationships, all their fault. He was about to be fired, kicked out of the room he rented and was in dept. i offered to help get him a job and would help. I got him a place to live and a job. He was happy and I was glad to help. He got back after being away and came around to say thanks for what I had done. We saw each other from then when he made contact. As time went on he moved in with me and would often ask to borrow money i never got back. We were building a future, and paying his debts off were part of that. It wasn’t til we went for a housing loan and all his debt was shown. He didn’t qualify. I paid off some so we could move forward. I found out he was still on dating sites. His reply was “but it’s not like I’m contacting them” I cracked and he became abusive. Never sorry but said he wouldn’t have acted like that if I didn’t crack up. This continued and could be about any tiny thing. Yelling at me in public and saying things that weren’t true. I thought us buying a house might settle him. It’s what he always wanted and never had. He’d had many jobs, been fired from 2. and never his fault. It took the funds from selling my house to buy it but he seem better. I put my half in and he took a loan for his and built a nice home. That was 2 years ago. The years have been Ricky. My friends don’t come around or my family. Giving me such a hard time about them it was easier to let them go. I started believing the fights were my fault. I should just keep quiet. Poke the bear and you’re going to get hurt, he would say. Threaten to leave or just walking out not knowing if he’s coming back. Standing over me while I was crying and yelling abuse. You get timid after a while. He doesn’t apologise ever. He’ll tell me I’m the one that’s got problems and I need to change. It’s my fault he gets angry. I’ve had to use my super, the money I got from mum passing, money from selling a car etc. I had to or we couldn’t pay bills in between his jobs and buying expensive things. I live tight. There’s no money and he is supporting me financially so its worse. He doesn’t want me working. I saw a block of land like we had always liked it belonged to a friend. It was cheap and we could sell our house, build a little home and have money in the bank, have a small loan and not have the worry. It might stop the pressure that makes him angry. I told him about it and I was told “if you want to move then I’ll buy you out and you can go live wherever the f**k you want.” He started saying horrible things and I started crying and walked off to a spray of abuse. I couldn’t believe he was prepared to just pay me out and not be together anymore. I was quiet after that and then a few days later he suggested we have a look at the block. He started making plans where the house would go and selling our house. I finally thought things were going to be ok and then on the way home I asked what had changed his mind to buy me out. He said “if I did I wouldn’t come out with much once I paid you out.” I was gutted. I realised that he was using me to get a house. Even though I was there through every crisis, I took the abuse and put him firs. I took him to work and during the day I wrote an email saying I only wanted us to be happy and not have the financial stress and enjoy life more. I said I didn’t understand why he was going to buy me out and it hurt when he said that. The email I got back was full of blame and abuse and telling me I’m the one that has to change and it’s my fault etc., and if I didn’t see anything wrong with myself, then we should sell the house and go our seperate ways. i couldn’t believe the complete turn around and I thought about it, i started thinking this is never going to end. Today I got the strength to email back and say we see things differently and I think it’s best to sell the house and go our seperate ways. I feel good about that decision. I’ve finally see I can have a good life. I haven’t heard back yet but I know I will. To be honest I'm frightened to open that email. Any suggestions or advice would be welcomed as I'm starting to think I should have just kept quiet. It’s the backlash that I'm scared of and I'm not sure if I should read it or not. Thankyou for taking the time to read my story.

Introducing myself

replies: 4

Hi, so I have been experiencing a series of unfortunate events, and live a very stressful life right now. I could just really use a place to vent some of my frustrations and feelings as I don't have access to a reliable source of psychological or soc... View more

Newbie

replies: 1

Hi All, I am new here. Life has been very unkind of late and the struggle is real. I feel lost , scared, sad, full of anger and rage. I do see a psychologist and she is amazing. Just wish I could see her more often

Introducing myself

replies: 3

I’ve joined the forum tonight. Hoping it helps me with my mental health. I’ve named myself G_S which represents getting stronger. That’s my intention. Getting stronger and maybe being compassionate and helpful to others in the process.

Ups and Downs

replies: 1

Sometimes I feel like I am doing ok and then I am not. I don't know how to measure progress.

Just need to chat.

replies: 23

Hi everyone. Just signed up so I can have a place to chat about my depression and anxiety. Feel I am losing the battle.

grieving alienated 20/F daughter

replies: 11

Hi there to anyone,believe it or not this is my first post ever on anything. Im a 46/M.Havent seen or spoken to my daughter since she was 16 and I yelled at her {lost temper} on the phone.approx 5 years ago. I get some info on how she is and what shes doing from my mother who talks to her every now and then.This gives me a lot of hope I have tried to contact her a few times .she has blocked me on her phone ,sent back her 18th birthday card and present and mom only said the other day she never asks about you. I thought I had grieved my daughters loss a couple of years ago when I started bursting into tears often while driving,then researched online and realised what was happening,with Fathers day I have been upset a lot again this year and got really anxious and then got angry. I tried to put on a brave face when she told me she I would never see her again but it seems to have caught up with me with time.I have read a lot on the net on alienated children {which im certain has played the most part }and adopted the advice to look after myself,keep busy working so if she did ever want to reconcile I could be there for her in the best capacity.At least ive tried to. I have made a lot of mistakes but to cut off all together doesnt seem fair,I dont think I deserve that,but understand {from what ive read on the subject]I can only "leave the door open"and pray that one day she will want some reconciliation. Im looking for a conversation with some people of similar experiences to help each other out a bit with mutual tips and advice and understanding. When you get a bit older and realise how precious and short life is.Knowing how every day without her is a day lost forever and how it could be ok if we could just talk,I believe that just one step ,one conversation and it would be ok. I my other main issue is Im of the firm belief that I was in a relationship with a narcasist type of person,and that person is in my daughters life now and was in her childhood.im not qualified to tell you what type and level.Definetely a level above the average joe though and that was thirteen years ago.I havent been able to want or have a serious relationship since.Again I have seeked solace and comfort on the internet,knowing youre not robinson cruso and gaining an understanding of the behavours really helped. I was just wondering if the grief ever stops or will it often raise its ugly head? Wow that feels good to write,should have done it a long time ago.

FREE MENTAL HEALTH GLOBAL SUMMIT 12 - 18 September, 2023

replies: 0

Hi everyone, Please refer to the web address below to find out more about this free online event. https://www.mentalhealthglobalsummit.com/ Hope you are having a good day,indigo22

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Hello out there! replies: 11

AnimalLover2 replies: 14

Looking for your words of encouragement and support replies: 19

Introducing myself replies: 4

Newbie replies: 1

Introducing myself replies: 3

Ups and Downs replies: 1

Just need to chat. replies: 23

grieving alienated 20/F daughter replies: 11

FREE MENTAL HEALTH GLOBAL SUMMIT 12 - 18 September, 2023 replies: 0