Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Hi all

replies: 10

Tonight, i was repeating to myself over and over again i wont kill myself. I just dont know what to do anymore, i feel like ive fallen into a black hole and i really cant take it anymore. There is something seriously wrong with me but i have to carry on and pretend like nothing is happening. I've self medicated with alcohol for a long time but its reached the point i can't function without it. I've browsed these forums in the past but im really not after platitudes. I just need something that will fix me before i go nuclear. I really dont know what can be achieved by posting on here but i just thought i would reach out to people who have had the same.

Everything, including myself, is too much. TW

replies: 1

*TW - suicidal thoughts* I am a usually happy person who has been struggling for the last 12mon. I am about to graduate medical school and have my final exams soon which is a source of stress. I also have one of my final clinicals finish just prior to exams. The clinicals are long hours, all day, every day and overnight for three weeks. After 12 months of this and exams, I am not coping well. Compounding this my partner of 6 years (lived with for 4 years) had planned to propose after I graduate. During a discussion about it recently he reacted poorly saying I was putting pressure on him and that I was ‘too much’. I find it hard to ask for things in this relationship due to the financial disparity. I have been studying for 6 years. I have worked during this to support myself and contribute. I do most of the housework. I try to make everything perfect considering the long hours he works. He makes good money working for a large company in management. I would like to specialise in a niche field. We love where we currently live so I took a job close so that I could prioritise us, and possibly having a baby in the next few years. This job isn’t as fulfilling as if we moved but I made the decision that I’ve been studying for so long that I wanted to have a family and put that first. He also acted extremely negatively towards having a family soon. He said that he’s too pressured to support just us and he needs me to work full time for years before we consider that. I feel I’ve been auditioning to be his wife for years and he’s pushing the decision back. Since the discussion he hasn’t mentioned it at all. Meanwhile I’m slowly crumbling under the pressure of study, work, being unable to ask for things in the relationship, watching other people get engaged, have babies, the prospect of working in a less fulfilling job without having a family to be worth it I deleted social media because I couldn’t stand it. I’m restless, I cry all the time. I had an appointment with a psych but cancelled it because I had to wait 6 weeks and I can’t book ahead with uni. I think about writing suicide notes and harming myself. I don’t have anyone I can talk to, they all have their own issues. I just don’t have the strength to do anything right now and I have no idea how I’m going to pass finals when I can’t even watch a half an hour TV show without fiddling, and self-harming I’m losing it. No one else knows.

Coping in the emergency department

replies: 350

Sometimes in mental health crisis's we end up in the emergency department. And that totally ok, being safe is important. but how do we cope with our crisis while waiting? What are some helpful strategies you have found useful during your stay in the department? I often get stuck in the emergency room waiting room overnight due to the fact there is no mental health team 24/7 where I live. I'm really struggling being here tonight. My usual strategies of listening to music isn't really working so I'm wondering if there is anything else I should try. Please note my concentration and attention is limited due to being in crisis. I feel trapped and stuck. I wish lifeline text was 24/7 coz I could really use someone to talk to. Are there any other online options as I cant really call someone due to the nature of a waiting room.

How do i find the will to keep going on?

replies: 5

I honestly can’t do this anymore. What’s the point in living? I am so tired and getting out of bed everyday has become a really hard thing to do now. I really wish that i would never wake up every night as i go to sleep. Everything about me is messed up, and these past few days i cry myself to sleep. I thought i was getting better, i thought i finally got rid of the negative thoughts, i guess not. I feel so irritated all the time and i get mad at people easily. I hate being with people, i feel so alone all the time no matter where I’m at. I had an anxiety attack today and my hands couldn’t stop shaking. I’ve been self-harming and it's affecting me negatively. It’s getting harder and harder to breathe everyday. if you are reading this or have read this, I’m sorry for ranting, i just wanted to let some of it out

asking for help when i’m suicidal and telling me to just calm down. Trigger warning - Sexual Assault

replies: 4

hey everyone i’m izzy i’m 16 at the moment i’m currently doing vcal in year 11 i tried vce but it was too much on my mental health. i havnt been at school since 2019 and now i’m getting thrown into year 11 this year. This is my story. in 2016, i was in grade 6. there was an incident at the school which resulted in a school lockdown of around 5-6 hours. We had no food because our lunches where in another building. A lot of kids were crying and passing out including me. Eventually we were escorted out and taken to get our bags from our classroom and go into the junior building were they had labelled the classrooms in alphabetical order and if you had siblings. i found my little sister who was in year 2 who was 7 at the time. We were in such a large room and it was so terrifying. After my mum had picked us up she took us home and let and behold there was a huge fire across from my house. Ever since then i developed ocd and anxiety when i was 11-12 in 2016. My anxiety has always been with me since. it wasn’t as bad in year 7 but i still had to see a school counsellor. Year 8 at the end is where it all went down hill i stopped eating and developed an eating disorder and became anorexic. I gained the weight back and i hate myself so much now like looking back on the photos i was so pretty and skinny. Year 9 in 2019 is when i developed panic disorder and i would have constant panic attacks at school and home and i would have to get picked up from school constantly and leave class. People would judge me and tell me i was faking. my panic attacks would be so bad i sat in the coordinators office and wouldn’t catch the bus home. My lips would vibrate and i would be dizzy and nearly pass out. I eventually stopped going to school and just never went back. i went into modeling for a shoot and it was okay but they said to come back when i had matured. Throughout 2019-2020 i tried a specialist school for anxiety after not being at school for like 5 months. that’s where i met my ex boyfriend i wasn’t at the school for long. i then tried online school and it was good at the start and then i wanted to go to normal school but now that i’m back at normal school i hate it.

Just another human who's had enough of life

replies: 8

I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Like everything else in my life, it seems pointless. I'm posting my nonsense on a random website so that complete strangers will acknowledge and empathise with me. Nobody close to me has. Not that I've really opened up about it. How the hell do you do that? I've pretty much decided that I've had enough of my life and it's time to leave it. I imagine those close to me being a little shocked and maybe saddened but not completely surprised that I ended my life, then carrying on like nothing happened. In time I'll be a distant memory, like an old injury. I feel tired, heavy like a burden, a waste of space, useless. Seriously, what's the point in drifting through days and nights filled with conflict, misery and feelings of hopelessness? If I went away, those around me would be free to enjoy their lives without the darkness that I bring. This is from my favourite song: "As my anger shouts at my own self-doubt, so a sadness creeps into my dreams. When you're scared of living but afraid to die, I get scared of giving and I must find the faith to beat it." But I can't...

Relapsed

replies: 1

After 70 days I relapse and I don’t even care, like it’s not a big deal for me although I think it should be? The only reason I ever kept clean in the first place was so I didn’t have to hide it from my parents, I’m not even doing it for myself and I... View more

What does the CATT team do?

replies: 1

Hello I am OK at the moment, but I’m putting together a “safety plan” if I am suicidal, and who I can get support from at differing levels of distress. Can someone tell me why someone would call the CATT team rather than 000? What does the CATT team ... View more

Confused and heartbroken, need advice

replies: 1

Hi all, ive been with my partner for 3 years now. We don’t have the best communication skills in our relationship as my partner is not expressive at all, rather avoiding people and being by himself. He likes to handle things in own time, which I complete understand. I suffer with a lot of mental health issues, which have gotten worse over the last few months. I will admit that we haven’t been ourselves for the last 2-3 months. We are in a constant cycle of him getting frustrated with me over small things and me getting emotional. Last night I could not cope with my feelings anymore and relapsed into SH. when I told my partner broke down and said our relationship isn’t healthy and he knows he has treated me badly (which he absolutely has not). He told me he hasn’t been feeling himself for the past few months and he doesn’t know what’s wrong with him, that we need to break up because we’re just too different emotionally. My mum picked me up last night because he didn’t trust me to drive home by myselfand I am COMPLETELY heartbroken and confused. I just don’t understand how he can give up on us so easily. My partner lost a parent a few years ago which he told me he never got counsellling for, which is making me think that he has underlining issues he needs to sort out. Is our relationship really over or does he just need space? Did I scare him?? Please help me make some sort of sense out of this. Can someone please help me make sense of all of this??? I’m just so lost. Did me admitting my SH scare him?? Is it something he needs to sort out??

Hello! New and dunno what to do T_T

replies: 5

Hi everyone, I'm Mitch and I'm 24 ‍ I've been struggling with depression and anxiety among other things since I was 18. I think I might've been suffering since my early teens but did not get diagnosed until we moved to Australia because my home coun... View more

Hi everyone, I'm Mitch and I'm 24 🙇‍ I've been struggling with depression and anxiety among other things since I was 18. I think I might've been suffering since my early teens but did not get diagnosed until we moved to Australia because my home country treated mental illness as taboo... I've been medicated for it since 2014 and saw a psychiatrist for only a year. (I was not making any progress with her and could not afford to see another one) I have gotten better over the years, I was even able to complete a Cert III and Diploma in TAFE! I know it sounds silly but it's a feat that I thought was impossible for me since I have untreated ADHD, I couldn't even finish Yr 12. Anyway a month ago, I was able to land my first ever job as a casual waitress. I was a little nervous but overjoyed since I've been struggling to get a job which is understandable, nobody wants to hire a 24 y/o who has zero work experience (though I have been volunteering in an op shop on weekends) My problem is my depression is worsening again after starting my new job. I start crying and throwing up a day before my shift even starts because I dread it so much. I do still report in, it's just I get so anxious to the point I can't do much else but lie in my room until work. The job itself isn't too difficult, I can keep up with the physical demands and I don't mind getting criticism, but it's hard when the manager always looks at you like they want you dead. When I say hi/goodbye/thank you, they don't even bother to look at me. My co-workers are a little nicer but it's still clear that they don't want me there. I've even considered injuring myself so I can't come to work. I want to quit so bad but I feel that I'm overreacting, that this is something everyone goes through when they start their first job and I can't complain because I brought this on myself. I've been applying everywhere but have yet to get an offer so I'm starting to fall back into the mindset that I just wasn't meant for this world. I do have parents who love me and provide for me but I don't want them to spend the rest of their lives worrying about me. I do have friends but none of them close enough that I can share these thoughts comfortably. That's why I decided to share on this forum so I at least have an outlet for my worries. Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings and I hope you are doing well on your end.

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Hi all replies: 10

Everything, including myself, is too much. *TW* replies: 1

Coping in the emergency department replies: 350

How do i find the will to keep going on? replies: 5

asking for help when i’m suicidal and telling me to just calm down. ***Trigger warning - Sexual Assault*** replies: 4

Just another human who's had enough of life replies: 8

Relapsed replies: 1

What does the CATT team do? replies: 1

Confused and heartbroken, need advice replies: 1

Hello! New and dunno what to do T_T replies: 5