Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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I don't know where to go from here

replies: 2

Hi, I've been feeling really hopeless and suicidal recently and I'm not completely sure how to get help. I have a lot of trouble with motivation but I'm also sick of people telling me to "just breathe" or "take it one step at a time" but that doesn't help anymore! I need someone to convince me it's worth it to keep going. I'm not doing it because of my family or friends, I just don't think I should continue. I don't know, I've been feeling like this for almost 2 years now and I just feel it's time to give up.

Struggling with intrusive thoughts

replies: 2

Hi everyone, I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts but they do not feel like my own. It has been happening for about 6 months now. My sister committed suicide two years ago and my rational mind would do it or put my family through anything but I feel very trapped. Sometimes I have good days and then every two days I feel very very low. I feel like I talk about how depressed I have been with my boyfriend and I feel bad because I want our time to be happy together. I exercise, try to eat healthy and spend time with friends and dont drink often. I am trying so hard to do all the things i am meant to do. I have been to therapy a number of times but I felt like every week I wasnt getting anywhere and mindfullness kind of makes me anxious, especially when my thoughts dont go away. In my bad states my mind is either depressed and doesnt want to be here or angry at my family. My dad is an alcoholic and also struggles with depression but i get so irritable with my parents and struggle to show empathy. I feel like a bad person. I really want to stop feeling like this but my hope keeps disappearing the longer it goes.

Feeling sad

replies: 2

Hi I'm not doing well just feeling sad but I'm safe. My partner has cheated on me many times and I'm just broken. His also an alcoholic and my friend came down to visit and all they have done is go to the club and drink but nothing with me it's like I don't exist. This is his behaviour when he cheats. I also found out about 4 months ago he went to sex workers and lied to me for two years about it and in that time planned and made a baby with me. I'm not well physically either and at this point I just give up.

Running low on resilience.

replies: 6

Hi I posted a week ago when I was at a low point. I’ve tried to be positive, count the small wins etc. It works for a while but feels like I’m tricking myself with distraction because when I think about it, the issues are all still there. Only some are getting worse. The thing is that tackling a relentless flow of big problems, for over 50 years, wears you down and the resilience tank is empty. I can seem totally ok but if the smallest thing happens I mentally implode and become a mess. How is that meant to be worth living with. Every day. Im Having the “do I or don’t I” talk daily now. I’m not worried about dying, I’m worried about it failing and living even worse than now. I'm not sure why I’m posting this but probably because I have nobody else to talk to.

Lost and desperate

replies: 6

This is my first post and one I have written and deleted countless times. In the last few months I have attempted and wanted nothing more to end my life. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety and find most days all there is is darkness. I have in the last few months deleted all social media, lost all friends and family and become beyond afraid of venturing beyond my front door. I live on heavy anti dispersants and fight for anti anxiety medication because of its addictive properties. I have both a supportive gp and psychologist but that never makes the darkness go away. I am mum to speical needs children and a FIFO husband. I have no family support and some days am lucky to sleep 5 hrs a night. I have been recommended respite in a hospital but as I have only tried to end my life I guess you must be unconscious to qualify. The sad truth is depite it all. I want nothing more than to end this curse this pain!! Honestly no one would notice if I were to disappear as I have lost all family and never had any friends! So what on earth is the point. Year after year of darkness, honestly why can I not sleep never to wake. What does it take to be sick enough!

Reaching out

replies: 4

Hello everyone! I’ve never spoken or asked for help, I’ve been feeling suicidal the last few days , mainly from financial stress, can anyone give me any advice on what or who helps them ? Thank you

I’m trapped. How can I escape? There’s no hope.

replies: 48

The pictures and flashes of me killing myself are an endless loop. They go on and on and on and I can’t stop them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I get triggered so easily. I just want this pain to end. I’m trapped in my own head. I’m suffocating in air I thought was safe. I can’t escape... how do I escape this? There has to be another way. I fear there may not be any hope for me anymore. No one can help me so why bother? It’s like I’m dead already, just watching myself. Like I’m not even here anymore. What’s the point of this. It’s getting too much, how do I escape my own mind?

Have no motivation

replies: 5

Hey Need some ideas as I have no motivation and feel like a failure.I do get thoughts of self harm but I wouldn’t go through with any of it. I am off work at the moment as I can not deal with it at the moment

Hey, second time here 🙄

replies: 13

Hey i posted here back in 2017. feeling useless, tired and really just want to give up. i posted here in 2017, feeling exactly the same although probably more now than then. im now 46, married with an 18 yo daughter. Still getting absolutely no where in life, I work and pay bills, that’s it. That’s all I do, nothing else. All I now want to do is shut myself away from everyone and everything and just disappear. I’m really done with life, I have lived the last 20 years like this and I can’t do it anymore. I have one or two good days here and there where I can have a laugh, but that’s getting rarer and rarer. sorry for the waffle on, just need to get it off my chest

bf cheated with sex workers

replies: 4

I found out over a year ago that my bf of 20 years had cheated on me with escorts from sex and dating websites and visited brothels locally and also when he had been away on his annual holidays without me. This had gone on for over 4 years from the proof i have but i couldn't go further back to know if he had done it our whole relationship. He denied it all and said he was only looking at pictures but his phone records show a different story, 50 calls to sex workers in one day was one of the records. I am still with him but every day I'm in tears and sometimes i don't even eat because i feel so sick about it all. I don't know if he is still doing it as I'm to mentally drained to keep checking up on him so i don't look at his phone or anything anymore and i have suicidal thoughts on bad days, i sometimes wish i was dead so i didn't have to think about it all anymore. I feel like i wasted so many years on this person and i love him so much and had always done everything for him. Can something like this heal or will i feel like this every day forever, its already been over a year and tears still flow and i look at him and cant believe he lies to me when i know everything hes done, i just hadn't told him how much information i have. 20 years is a long time to throw away

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

I don't know where to go from here replies: 2

Struggling with intrusive thoughts replies: 2

Feeling sad replies: 2

Running low on resilience. replies: 6

Lost and desperate replies: 6

Reaching out replies: 4

I’m trapped. How can I escape? There’s no hope. replies: 48

Have no motivation replies: 5

Hey, second time here 🙄 replies: 13

bf cheated with sex workers replies: 4