Staying well

Support each other to stay well, from mindfulness, sleep, diet and exercise to reducing drug and alcohol use and coping with difficult emotions.

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Pinned discussions

Sophie_M Sleep and Mental Health
  • replies: 0

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remem... View more

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remember things, regulate our emotions, or to feel excited and energised… it can change the way we think and feel in such a significant and impactful way. Whether it’s due to big life changes, global pandemics, financial or work stressors, health concerns (like menopause), how much ‘you’ time you have, or even unprocessed emotions you weren’t aware were there – so many things can impact how you sleep. All of this goes to show that not only do your daily habits, routines, and experiences play a huge role in maintaining healthy sleep cycles, but so does your mental health. And frustratingly enough, your sleep also impacts and informs your mental health and daily habits. Like most things, it’s a very easy cycle to fall into. So, it’s imperative that we are gentle and compassionate with ourselves on our journey to understanding what is making us so hypervigilant and unable to rest in the first place. Studies show that journaling or mindfulness practices throughout the day, healthy food, movement, sunshine, connection with loved ones, and support from health professionals can help us to feel more grounded and able to rest. But we are curious… what has worked for you? When do you notice that your sleep is most affected vs. when you get the best rest? And is there a way you could practice regulating your nervous system more throughout the day to help promote better sleep at night? We would love to hear your thoughts! Let us know if you have any questions and be sure to check out our page on ‘Sleep and Mental Health’ for more guidance and insight into a more supported and restful night’s sleep: Sleep and mental health - Beyond Blue - Beyond Blue Looking forward to hearing from you! Kind regards, Sophie M

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

All discussions

TishaJade Is it really as bad as I think?
  • replies: 13

Hi all, I've posted a few times about how I feel about this situation, and it seems like I feel better for a little while, and then go back to the same thoughts and feelings. I just want to feel good and continue feeling good. It's hard to know if my... View more

Hi all, I've posted a few times about how I feel about this situation, and it seems like I feel better for a little while, and then go back to the same thoughts and feelings. I just want to feel good and continue feeling good. It's hard to know if my feelings are real, or if they are just fears and worries. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and it's clear we love each other a real lot. When we got together he told me he had a son from a previous unmarried relationship. At first I was fine with this. But as months passed I struggled. I struggle with the fact that he has had a child with someone else. And that I will NEVER be the only one to have children to him. I love him beyond measure, and I am JEALOUS that such a beautiful first milestone of having a first child was done without me. And that when we have our child, it will not be as special to him... I know that he did not love his ex the way he loves me. He never considered marriage, and having a child was only a way of fixing their relationship which, clearly, didn't work. He has told me that he actually wants to get married to me one day, and wants a proper family and this makes me feel good for a little while, but then I am plagued by the above feelings all over again. I feel like I have been an excellent step mum, and I know that his child loves me too. But at times I can't help but feel jealous that his son takes him away from me. That he is tied to a child and another woman and always will be. I need some serious waking up, facing reality and positive opinions. Can you understand how I feel? What can I do or how can I change these feelings? I am so emotional about this and have been for a long time. Maybe men aren't as emotional about all this stuff as women are?

Mel1980 Chronic Illness
  • replies: 1

I have just been diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis thought I have been in pain for over a couple of years on and off. I have an Autistic daughter who is really struggling with isolation at the moment and being separated from her friends and family ... View more

I have just been diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis thought I have been in pain for over a couple of years on and off. I have an Autistic daughter who is really struggling with isolation at the moment and being separated from her friends and family who she relies on for support. I want to be able to be there for her but its so draining at the moment i dont have the mental capacity to deal with it. Any tips on how I can sleep better and reduce my stress so I can be what she needs during this time?

Redcat96 How do I stay motivated?
  • replies: 2

Hey there, So currently I'm really struggling with life. I feel as though I am watching life happen before me and I'm just a passenger. With everything happening in the world currently I know it is hard not o feel like This but surely there is someth... View more

Hey there, So currently I'm really struggling with life. I feel as though I am watching life happen before me and I'm just a passenger. With everything happening in the world currently I know it is hard not o feel like This but surely there is something that could help and make life not seem so bleak. I think that lack of social interaction has really got to me as I do live alone. I am finding it take a massive toll on my mental health and well being and I feel as though talking to my family or friends about it I burden them. What are you guys doing during this Time to stay human and sane? Any suggestions are welcome as I feel so lost right now red cat

Nina83 Early Childhood Educator
  • replies: 2

Hi, I have been self isolating for the past 4 weeks and feeling increasing pressure to be at work in the early childhood industry. I don’t drive and live a fair way from my centre and am feeling pressure from parents who are my employers as the centr... View more

Hi, I have been self isolating for the past 4 weeks and feeling increasing pressure to be at work in the early childhood industry. I don’t drive and live a fair way from my centre and am feeling pressure from parents who are my employers as the centre I work for is a parent committee run centre. I am on unpaid leave and feeling like I want to resign from a job I have been doing for 20 years. Feeling helpless.

CaptainCab Disclosing You Have Genital Herpes
  • replies: 5

Hi all, I have recently separated from my wife of 15 years and I have had genital herpes for most of my adult life, in fact I can't recall which partner likely gave it to me because I had it before marriage. The thing is, I never disclosed it to any ... View more

Hi all, I have recently separated from my wife of 15 years and I have had genital herpes for most of my adult life, in fact I can't recall which partner likely gave it to me because I had it before marriage. The thing is, I never disclosed it to any partners previously (when I was young and dumb) but now that I am in my late 40's I am a responsible adult now so I want to be transparent to future partners. Luckily I have no outbreaks due to daily medication so the chances of transmitting are low. But, I wanted to know HOW do I bring this up to my next partner/s? Thanks

Sadie243 Isolation during the Coronavirus
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, First time user here. I live and work in regional Western Australia. Before this pandemic, I would go to Perth every weekend and visit my partner and friends. Since the closure of the WA regional borders, I cannot see them. I've been try... View more

Hi everyone, First time user here. I live and work in regional Western Australia. Before this pandemic, I would go to Perth every weekend and visit my partner and friends. Since the closure of the WA regional borders, I cannot see them. I've been trying to stay strong during this period but lately I've been struggling. I don't know when I'll see my partner again and that distresses me greatly. We talk everyday and video chat but it's not quite the same. If anyone is in the same situation and can provide some advice that would be much appreciated!

Mukti_misfiT A warm hello
  • replies: 1

Hey what's up, Man, today has been a good day. The first one I can honestly say in the past couple of weeks. With the whole corona virus changes going on I've really felt out of sorts. My routine has changed a lot as my usual coping tools have been E... View more

Hey what's up, Man, today has been a good day. The first one I can honestly say in the past couple of weeks. With the whole corona virus changes going on I've really felt out of sorts. My routine has changed a lot as my usual coping tools have been EXTREMELY limited. Along with the additional stress of my partner's employment uncertainty, the kids being at home, and my university studies I've really had to put firm action into keeping my head together. But, I'm finally having some success. I've walked with depression, PTSD, and addiction undiagnosed and untreated up until 6 years ago (when I was 27). I was an absolute mess, then I hit rock bottom and reached out. I struggled with accepting that my own way of being had landed me in a hospital ward on suicide watch, but I knew I had no where else to go, nothing I did seemed to work for me in getting out how I was feeling. Hopeless and pathetic. I was put on medication and had some time in hospital to stabilise before they sent me home. But guess what (?) Nothing changed. I was doing the same old thing, surpassing the same old demons, in denial that I could keep going in my career if old I could pull myself up from my boot straps that bit higher. and guess what happened.... 6 months later another visit to the ward, however this time the only way I was getting out was via detox and rehab. I remember feeling so broken, in my then realisation, that I could not do life. Not like how my wife seemed to do it, my friends, or everyone else I had met throughout my life. Why couldn't I do this living thing right! Am I the only one not getting this? ... and how a relief it was to meet other like me. Who felt with months struggling to feel .... anything. Who were haunted by their past, and couldn't be comfortable in their own skin. I'm so grateful to have met these people. We talk about how we struggled on a daily basis to emotionally regulated and shared tools and techniques in being responsible for our health and routines that help us in living a for-filled life with our "monsters". I spent the next 3 years addressing my stuff. I worked with my GP about getting the proper meds for me, I reached out to social communities for support, I saw a psychologist (and still do), and I tried every suggestion that was presented to me. From self-help work shops, meditation retreats, mens circles to overseas adventures. All to find what works for me to flourish in my new life. Looking forward to hearing y'all. MM

Doolhof dot points for positive things to do in isolation
  • replies: 3

. Read a book . Google your favourite hobby . Draw a picture . Clean out a cupboard . Make a card for a neighbour or friend . Meditate . Practise mindfulness . Listen to music, maybe even dance around the house . Dress up for a meal and use your favo... View more

. Read a book . Google your favourite hobby . Draw a picture . Clean out a cupboard . Make a card for a neighbour or friend . Meditate . Practise mindfulness . Listen to music, maybe even dance around the house . Dress up for a meal and use your favourite glasses and dinner set .

Waltr New Poster Trying to find an Avenue to Vent
  • replies: 5

Hey! This feels like the first time I did therapy, scary but needed. Anyway just checking this chat board out as essentially I’m at a bit of a loss mentally. Spent a solid 2 years in therapy 1 full day a week but it just doesn’t go. I got diagnosed w... View more

Hey! This feels like the first time I did therapy, scary but needed. Anyway just checking this chat board out as essentially I’m at a bit of a loss mentally. Spent a solid 2 years in therapy 1 full day a week but it just doesn’t go. I got diagnosed with bipolar among other things a few years back but struggled with the medication, it just made me put on weight and turn me into a zombie. I just live in constant fear and mental pain, I have to walk through life hiding it. It starts as soon as I open my eyes, my mind is manic. I’m 37 and I had to step away from my business and essentially retire... which is just not doable, problem is all I know how to do is run a business. So I’ve tried to start back up again but I simply don’t have the stomach for it anymore. I always knew mentally I had problems but I also attributed that to the way I was as a person and it made me, ‘me’. A lot of people told me during therapy and when I was on medication was that it was destroying the real ‘me’. That aside since therapy I have cut out all alcohol, drugs etc and bad foods. I’m vegan now, I run up to 20k a day as it helps with my mind. Having ‘control’ over my body is a big awakening, it’s a positive I can control to not impact things around me, it helps. Overall I feel I’m a better person after therapy but I have days/ weeks where my mind just goes, it’s uncontrollable. Like a snowball building steam down a hill growing. It’s scary but I probably should meditate, enjoy the present and just be thankful for what’s around me, which I am. I am so thankful, I really just wish I was stronger mentally like I was for so long. I am grateful for the support system I have around me but I don’t want to alarm or burden them with the fact that I’m not coping again, I know that’s the wrong attitude but I don’t. I do feel I hide it well but the worry and the seclusion just isn’t healthy. Anyway I can’t really afford therapy anymore so I’m just looking for something like this online where I can connect with others who have the same thing and just get what it’s like to live with this. I’ve spent a lot of time learning about all this so hopefully I can help others in some way. Thanks for listening!