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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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KaraArtist Something that gets me through the tough times
  • replies: 2

I found this website: http://www.excelatlife.com/apps.htm there is lots of helpful articles and applications here. These are my favourite two applications, they have really turned my life around. Depression CBT Self-Help Guide & Stop Panic and Anxiet... View more

I found this website: http://www.excelatlife.com/apps.htm there is lots of helpful articles and applications here. These are my favourite two applications, they have really turned my life around. Depression CBT Self-Help Guide & Stop Panic and Anxiety Self-Help have a look, and hopefully they will help you too.

Suzbj I am astounded with how much my life has changed!! It has to be a Miracle!! So never doubt 'miracles' can happen for you too!
  • replies: 10

Writing a response to a message took me back to a hell I never thought I could possibly get out of. I was lost and finished. There was no hope and no way out. I was done and dusted and death had to be better than this except I had a teenage child so ... View more

Writing a response to a message took me back to a hell I never thought I could possibly get out of. I was lost and finished. There was no hope and no way out. I was done and dusted and death had to be better than this except I had a teenage child so I had to keep fighting. Then, when she was 20yo we lost our relationship completely due to her partner and in-laws. I spent every single day of five or so years waking up every morning and dreaming of suicide and my last thought each night. But I had had to live with my mother's suicide, so I didn't want to hurt my daughter in that way. I felt so angry towards my daughter who no longer seemed to care that I didn't even have the right to End IT!!! That I had to consider my daughter and grandson!! Yes, that might sound selfish and was in the severe emotional pain I was feeling. There is a lot more I could ad to this but won't because it hurts too much. Bottom line, I am still here and I thank God, thank my daughter, thank my grandson, thank anyone and everyone, thank the doctors in intensive care, the paramedics and everyone involved that I thought let me down at the time. I thank God and our medical professionals I am still here. Nothing has changed re my daughter. I still have no contact with her or my grandson. But I thank God, The Higher Power, The Universe, every day for being alive and the gift of life. I now live for me!

Suzbj How dark times can be yet they are not real and make you miss out on the magic of life - my story
  • replies: 2

All people from all demographics are living their own personal journeys. People with depression are living their personal journeys. And yes, it does allow us all to understand and give compassion, honesty, integrity and sensitivity. We are strong! Wh... View more

All people from all demographics are living their own personal journeys. People with depression are living their personal journeys. And yes, it does allow us all to understand and give compassion, honesty, integrity and sensitivity. We are strong! Whether we know it or not... we are! We have so much to give. That needs to begin with giving that kindness, compassion, honesty, integrity and sensitivity to ourselves first and foremost. Than we can truly move mountains! :) I wished to die the day my mother committed suicide when I was five years old. To me, and based on what my father said, she did not want me. Otherwise she would have taken me with her, right?? So I had to live. From the age of five years old I tried to find a way to end things. I tried to commit suicide a few times. Then five years ago it was for real. I still don’t understand biologically how I am still alive. I was in intensive care on a million machines for a few days and was shocked to wake up. I was disappointed that the hospital didn’t let me die. There was nothing to live for. What was wrong with them to keep me alive and waste resources on me?? Then I went out with a mental health worker who was awesome. He let me get my head together and was just there while I had a ***. Then an epiphany happened that has never left me. “I am here alive because I am supposed to be. It is not my right to say when this life is to end. I am supposed to be here right here and right now.” As sad and difficult as some times have been and as easy for me it would be to end things, I can’t ever go there again. Not to say it is easy but I now know and respect that I need to let my life pan out and I am so very grateful to still be alive. And I now know there is a reason for me to be here even if I don’t understand what that is. I could never have imagined that life could get so good. I am still unemployed, there is still a lot I am working to but I wake up each day now with an immense gratitude for being alive. That, in itself, is a miracle to me. Love you all Suz xx

Suzbj To Everyone Who Has Depression and/or Anxiety
  • replies: 4

To everyone who has depression, there is a strength in you all that some of you may not recognise yet. I have recently discovered that strength in myself which was a personal epiphany. Me saying it won't make it happen in a meaningful way to you. It ... View more

To everyone who has depression, there is a strength in you all that some of you may not recognise yet. I have recently discovered that strength in myself which was a personal epiphany. Me saying it won't make it happen in a meaningful way to you. It has to come to you on a personal level and it will if you just hang in there. I just want to encourage you to hang in there. Just keep fighting and stay proud of who you are because who you are so valuable and worthy. Or you wouldn't have been born and be on this planet. Today I got an email from someone that explained why my daughter wants nothing to do with me and won't allow contact wth my grandson who I love dearly as I love my daughter dearly. It is because I have depression. One month ago I probably would have lost the plot completely if not worse. Today, it was - well, that is her loss. And unfortunately my grandsons loss. I have Clinical Depression. That is my life. I am doing the best I can. I am not unkind, hurtful or out to do wrong to anyone. It is my daughter's loss and unfortunately my grandson's who has no say. But I am okay. And still strong. LIfe is what it is. And the most important thing that anyone can do is learn to love themselves. It is internal that matters most and has the power to destroy or raise up. Others, even those we love, can only destroy us if we let them. By loving ourselves we are better equipped to not only be kind to ourselves, but kind and forgiving to others. I love my daughter and it is her right to feel and react as she has. She is on her life's journey as I am on my mine. All is well with the world and I will never stop loving her. Take care Suz

BOUNCINGBACKCHIP hard to talk but worthy of opening up and asking for help
  • replies: 2

Hi all, I am just another of many trying to stay afloat in the ocean of depression , I just want to share that since i joined beyondblue recently,that i have found in the understanding and sharing of personal thoughts and feelings from others in the ... View more

Hi all, I am just another of many trying to stay afloat in the ocean of depression , I just want to share that since i joined beyondblue recently,that i have found in the understanding and sharing of personal thoughts and feelings from others in the same or similar circumstances to my self has been both enlightening (i am not alone) and very beneficial to my own well being . I have just spoken on the phone to a Councillor of beyondblue for the first time and this was very helpful in getting me moving towards recovery of a deep depression. Just want to say ... be brave , swallow the pride and open up ... You''ll never know what is around the proverbial "Blind Corner "... unless we stick our necks out have the guts and have a look whats there. Thank you beyondblue! for providing a positive safe and helpful environment that all at some time need Cheers all and safe travels Greg (chip)

vip A wise quote for everyone on this forum
  • replies: 14

Hi everyone I came across this piece of writing on the mental health awareness website and i think this best describes all of us on this forum that suffer with mental illness. The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, k... View more

Hi everyone I came across this piece of writing on the mental health awareness website and i think this best describes all of us on this forum that suffer with mental illness. The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation of sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happens. All of us on this forum have spirit and we are beautiful on the inside and out because we have basically all been to hell and back . Together as a group by sharing our stories we can help one another with the demons of depression that follow us everday and get back on track with our lives and start living. Take care to all of you xxx

Mares73 Hope & Support for this forum
  • replies: 3

Dear all At the moment it seems most (or many) members are experiencing real challenges with the illness we know as depression. Often it's difficult to separate anxiety from depression as they commonly coexist. For example I suffer from both but have... View more

Dear all At the moment it seems most (or many) members are experiencing real challenges with the illness we know as depression. Often it's difficult to separate anxiety from depression as they commonly coexist. For example I suffer from both but have stuck to this forum. Reading through each post I can't respond to everyone but I try my hardest to offer those in desperate need -even a short note that i feel for, and are thinking of them. i should clarify that the purpose of this site isnt for members to provide support to anyone-rather the primary purpose is to share, reach out for support for yourself & along the way you may find peoples stories & experiences you can relate to & possibly reach out to. For me this is my sole form of support at the moment (if you want to textualise read my last post "Broken Heart"). So I can't describe my gratitude as the support I received/am receiving at one of the lowest points of my life, has in so many ways helped me to survive-even if its only existence until I get help to feel alive again. And I've struggled with this illness a longtime-and the usual symptoms such as extreme low confidence, despair, frustration & isolation. I appreciate its one of the toughest battles we each face & in the community we still have not broken the stigma that depression IS an illness. At times you may be able to scrape by, at others you may need constant ongoing care & support. It is a difficult thing to ACCEPT this illness & if we could, we may be able to make adjustments in our lives to live with it. But to fight year after year hoping that you can completely "overcome" this illness-makes it more difficult-I think-to have support put in place & to educate those in your life who could be a support if they understood the illness. I've always avoided it, found it too painful to accept its an ongoing part of myself that I need to accept & be able to recognise rather than avoid the symtoms that suggest a depressive onset. I recognise now that I HAVE to accept it, the same way I'd have to accept that I had any form of a serious illness & similarly adapt my life so I had the right treatment & knew what to do if I felt really unwell. There are members here far far more insightful than I am & I in no way think I have a better understanding of this illness. I humbly thank the people who have shown me genuine compassion, support & advice. There's times it seems a small group can focus on a member in crisis & provide all the care & support they can. Then there's other times (this week may be an example) where each person is struggling in their own way & has to focus on their own recovery & keep any energy or strength they have for themselves. Yet other amazing people keep the spirit of the forum alive. For that, I just wanted to say thankyou. And to those in pain, isolation & despair-I can only hope that you find this site or the support you each need to get well. im just holding on & that's all I can do right now. But no gratitude is enough for the friendships, connections, care & support I have found on this forum. I truly hope we continue to share our journeys on Beyond Blue. Lve Mares xxx

DarkSkies Weight Issue
  • replies: 6

Hi, I have been diagnosed with depression since 2006. There has been good times in that period. When i am on my medication i can live a normal life. This last year i tried again to reduce the medication because i have weight issues. It put me in hosp... View more

Hi, I have been diagnosed with depression since 2006. There has been good times in that period. When i am on my medication i can live a normal life. This last year i tried again to reduce the medication because i have weight issues. It put me in hospital. I was angry for a long time after because i can't help the weight. I am asking the beyond blue community how you dealt with the weight gain? Is there some way around it? I go to gym 3 to 4 times a week. I walk my dog every day. Please help me.

JCliff Second Post
  • replies: 3

I have posted once before, the shorthand version on how I dealt with my depression. I have often found that writing or in this case typing is a good way to process my thoughts and feelings. Funnily enough I used to do a lot of it but now I don't. Bac... View more

I have posted once before, the shorthand version on how I dealt with my depression. I have often found that writing or in this case typing is a good way to process my thoughts and feelings. Funnily enough I used to do a lot of it but now I don't. Back then what I wrote was destructive, hurtful, not to anyone apart from myself. A way to verbalise my feelings about my own self worth so that they just weren't thoughts swimming around in my head. It is coming up on 12 months since I attempted to take my own life. I have for the past month thought about it a lot and it has made me feel a large number of emotions both good and bad. I have unlike the past reached out to my girlfriend, family and psychologist to let them know that I had been thinking about what happened and in the grand scheme of things it has been very difficult. I have been moody on occasions and have been once again that feeling of overwhelming tiredness. I am not quite sure how I will go coming closer to the date. Although I have come an extremely long way since March 18th 2013, it is a scar that I feel everynow and then when my mind wanders. I read an article this week written by Alan Stokes on depression, Ian Thorpe, Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Matthew Reilly who appeared on Australian Story. After reading it I cried, felt an overwhelming sense of sadness because those are feelings that we all know and fears that we face as we battle this illness. There are a number of things that help me each day. The knowledge that despite what my fears were, the people who love me will not run when I am sad. It is ok to have bad days and it is ok to tell people your having a **** day. Today is one of those days, pretty ****, pretty flat and I am slowly counting down the hours until it comes to an end. But I will go home to my girlfriend and step son and know that everything will be ok, that I can say it was a crap day and will receive a hug a kiss that will help. So if you are feeling crappy today, pick up the phone, call someone from your family, call a friend and it could just turn your whole day around.

Guest_3712 What's Behind the Door?
  • replies: 1

Hi guys, I found this piece of writing tucked in a pocket of my wallet yesterday- ( co- incidence?) I wrote this some 4 years ago , on my first admission to a psych hospital . Obviously I was in a different state of mind then but I think the meaning ... View more

Hi guys, I found this piece of writing tucked in a pocket of my wallet yesterday- ( co- incidence?) I wrote this some 4 years ago , on my first admission to a psych hospital . Obviously I was in a different state of mind then but I think the meaning is till the same. What's behind the Door? Going in or coming out? Sliding across and back again. Double doors, single doors, painted doors, stained doors. Coming out or going in. Glass doors, metal doors, steel doors, timber doors. Exit or entrance, way in way out. Goodbye old life, Hello new life. Close the doors of doubt and confusion The key to happiness unlocks the door of hope The door of hope is the door untried. Take Care all Stressless