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Sophie_M Sleep and Mental Health
  • replies: 0

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remem... View more

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remember things, regulate our emotions, or to feel excited and energised… it can change the way we think and feel in such a significant and impactful way. Whether it’s due to big life changes, global pandemics, financial or work stressors, health concerns (like menopause), how much ‘you’ time you have, or even unprocessed emotions you weren’t aware were there – so many things can impact how you sleep. All of this goes to show that not only do your daily habits, routines, and experiences play a huge role in maintaining healthy sleep cycles, but so does your mental health. And frustratingly enough, your sleep also impacts and informs your mental health and daily habits. Like most things, it’s a very easy cycle to fall into. So, it’s imperative that we are gentle and compassionate with ourselves on our journey to understanding what is making us so hypervigilant and unable to rest in the first place. Studies show that journaling or mindfulness practices throughout the day, healthy food, movement, sunshine, connection with loved ones, and support from health professionals can help us to feel more grounded and able to rest. But we are curious… what has worked for you? When do you notice that your sleep is most affected vs. when you get the best rest? And is there a way you could practice regulating your nervous system more throughout the day to help promote better sleep at night? We would love to hear your thoughts! Let us know if you have any questions and be sure to check out our page on ‘Sleep and Mental Health’ for more guidance and insight into a more supported and restful night’s sleep: Sleep and mental health - Beyond Blue - Beyond Blue Looking forward to hearing from you! Kind regards, Sophie M

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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Shrinkingviolet Negative internal dialogue
  • replies: 1

I started seeing a psychologist recently and became really aware of my negative internal dialogue. As part of the steps to relieving anxiety and depression I started to write down my cognitive distortions. I would try to pick up when I was beating my... View more

I started seeing a psychologist recently and became really aware of my negative internal dialogue. As part of the steps to relieving anxiety and depression I started to write down my cognitive distortions. I would try to pick up when I was beating myself up unfairly and make a note of it. It was going well. I was really proud of myself when I overcame a fear of mine and joined a netball team. I was on top of the world. But then as I started to play I realised that I was not finding it as enjoyable as I thought I would. I spend so much time during games and at training saying things to myself like "you should have caught that ball" "you should have stopped that pass" " you need to be faster " "you look like an idiot" "the team were better off without you". Now the real issue for me is that this dialogue is not exactly internal. Some comments escape. And I find myself yelling at myself "you idiot" . It's humiliating. I'd rather just carry on and shake it off and try harder to not make the mistake again. But I can't. I start spiralling. I just want to shrink away. Has anyone else experienced something similar and overcome it? I just want to be able to walk away smiling and not beating myself up for days about something that is supposed to be fun.

Gorto72 Is it Losing Hope, Or is It Depression?
  • replies: 3

I've always considered myself to be in control of myself and my feelings. I dont and never have felt like hurting myself or others, infact I'm the opposite. I feel the need to help others before I help myself, I will go out of my way to do things - b... View more

I've always considered myself to be in control of myself and my feelings. I dont and never have felt like hurting myself or others, infact I'm the opposite. I feel the need to help others before I help myself, I will go out of my way to do things - build things - help others - be there for others before I do for myself. I begin my own projects and lose interest or findmyself just sitting and pondering over and over again how to do it to perfection. I'll do something and redo it again because its not to a high standard. Yet when I do it for someone else, I feel happier, I feel I need to get it done and I feel happier making other people happy..What takes me a day to do for someone else takes me 5 days to do for myself..??? I have a government job that requires me to be employed casual and I love my job. I dont feel pressure, I go to work with a belief that I mite actually help someone. But its the management - Bosses who make me wonder my capabilities. Recently I left my family for several months in the hope that I can prove I'm capable of the job, I'm prepared to do what it takes and I belong, after 4 yrs of trying. Then a person 3 months as a casual get the job instead. I worked hard, with pride and then again its all taken away, once again. Now I have returned home and my partner whom I love more then life itself is constantly criticised by me or I get snappy at what she has to say for no reason. I get up wanting to do things around the house that I have startted or need to do with einthusisium and excitment and then its gone.. I can see/feel my partner slowly being pushed away from me but she is a solid rock. My Question is this... Am I slipping into Depression or am I just giving up and how do you tell the difference?

Stitch My strategies for Easter
  • replies: 4

My strategies for the Easter long weekend: Log on to the BB website and read all the posts so I don't fel like I'm on my own. Fold out the divan in the lounge room and pile on the doona and pillows to facilitate spontaneous napping. Give the cats ext... View more

My strategies for the Easter long weekend: Log on to the BB website and read all the posts so I don't fel like I'm on my own. Fold out the divan in the lounge room and pile on the doona and pillows to facilitate spontaneous napping. Give the cats extra cuddles and belly rubs. Buy a gorgeous chocolate cake from the french bakery that I can slowly work my way through over the next 4 days. Chocolate being one of the 5 main food groups and therefore an excellent choice for breakfast Have lots of books, DVD's and crosswords on hand. Not very rock'n'roll I know, but it makes me happy. Buy enough Thai food for 4 days so I don't have to cook or wash too many dishes Ensure that my baking supplies are fully stocked in case I get the urge to bake something. Trawl the internet for funny utube videos. Hope you all have a safe and happy Easter.

Chris_B AFL players and coaches to open up about mental health
  • replies: 5

beyondblue is proud to announce a landmark media partnership with Channel 7 to promote the national Man Therapy campaign during AFL matches.Man Therapy is an Australian-first campaign that encourages men to look after their mental health and keep an ... View more

beyondblue is proud to announce a landmark media partnership with Channel 7 to promote the national Man Therapy campaign during AFL matches.Man Therapy is an Australian-first campaign that encourages men to look after their mental health and keep an eye out for their mates.The new partnership will work to reduce Australia’s shocking male suicide rate, which sees almost 2000 males take their own lives each year, double the number who die on Australian roads.beyondblue Chairman Jeff Kennett AC said by talking about mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety during the footy, it will reduce stigma and encourage men to seek support if they are struggling.“This partnership is the first of its kind for beyondblue and will ensure millions of AFL fans across the country are exposed to important messages promoting good mental health,” he said.“Men often don’t take action to tackle depression and anxiety because they see these conditions as a weakness and think that seeking support is a sign of failure.“However, by partnering with Channel 7 and its AFL broadcasts, we will be going right into the homes of Aussie men to tell them that nothing could be further from the truth.”This partnership will help us show men that mental health conditions are common and can affect even the toughest blokes, and that people are often amazed at how much better they feel once they seek the appropriate support.”“By reaching men during prime time AFL games and using some of the nation’s best-loved footy personalities to tell their own personal stories, this partnership will break down barriers and drive home the message that mental health conditions are nothing to be ashamed of.”Throughout the AFL season, Channel 7 will feature real-life stories during the games, where both past and present players and coaches will share their experiences with mental illness in their lives and how they overcame it.The impact depression can have on men was highlighted this week when Mitch Clark retired from football due to his depression.People who want to get behind the campaign will be able to contribute directly to beyondblue during the beyondblue Cup on July 26 between Hawthorn and Sydney.The Seven Network’s Head of Sport Saul Shtein said; “We are privileged to be working with beyondblue. Telling the stories of AFL people affected by mental illness will be a powerful way to deliver such an important message about the community’s health.”

Jo3 My week in hospital (part 1)
  • replies: 3

Hi everyone,Well I have been "released for the day" and so much has happened.Arrived on Monday morning feeling so sick and anxious. The nurse settled me into a shared room and I was shown around. I have never felt so alone as it was time for lunch an... View more

Hi everyone,Well I have been "released for the day" and so much has happened.Arrived on Monday morning feeling so sick and anxious. The nurse settled me into a shared room and I was shown around. I have never felt so alone as it was time for lunch and I had to walk into a dining room full of people who knew each other, to sit on my own. I felt like crying as I was so alone. I have cried quite a bit daily and have had a few anxiety attacks.The staff are very very caring, supportive and nurturing. and that is what I definitely needed. I have done some support group sessions at the hospital with a pyschologist, yoga, meditation, CBT, walking, art therapy and relaxation sessions. I also have had 3 sessions this week with my new pyschiatrist. Interesting how the sessions with him make me so damn angry, I hate what he says to me; talks about my childhood, my abuse, my self harming and then onto suicidal thoughts. I come out of the sessions in a rage because I hate the way he conducts the session. My regular pysch has come to visit me on Thursday which was really nice to see him.I have also been allowed to go for walks down the street, around the block and across a creek. The first two days I didn't and I felt like I was locked in, trapped so after a huge panic attack I told a male nurse I need to get out. He assured me that I could go the next day and I did. I have been walking daily for 45-60 minutes. The first walk I did was in the rain and I felt so alive, so great to just be outside in the fresh air.I have decided to stay an extra week much to the shock of my husband. But do you know what I don't care, I need to do this for myself. I am actually happy to go back tonight.I came home this morning and already the house is a mess, the curtains weren't even drawn and windows were still closed. Bathroom not clean, nothing done except washing out. I would normally go around and do everything but today I am sitting here and doing nothing. I actually feel tired as I haven't had a full night sleep so maybe I will have a nanna nap.I have met so many nice people all with different issues but mainly depression, bipolar, change of meds.Well my mum hasn't phoned me at all, actually after day 3 I decided to ring her and her comment was - oh i was waiting for you to ring!!! She knows my mobile number so where's her support. I phoned her before from home and told her i am home for a hairdressers appt and staying for another week - well her negative comments are coming out again; and I said it's helping me. I then asked her what is she doing for Easter and if she would like to come over on Sunday for lunch - her response as usual - oh no your dad doesn't like to go out anymore. So in the 4 months since talking again they have not made ONE attempt to come to visit me. I feel so tired of trying, I feel guilty for being in hospital, I feel selfish for leaving my family and having time out for me. I can't access my computer from the hospital because I am using my son's school laptop. So I won't be able to type again until tomorrow during my day release again. (sounds like I;m in prison with this day release thing!!!) I hope everyone is doing okay, please take careJo xxxx

Chris_B The two wolves of change
  • replies: 8

A colleague shared this story with me this morning, I thought I'd post it here to see what you all think...---The Two Wolves of ChangeThere are many theories about how people change – how they change their behaviour, change the ‘patterns’ that may ha... View more

A colleague shared this story with me this morning, I thought I'd post it here to see what you all think...---The Two Wolves of ChangeThere are many theories about how people change – how they change their behaviour, change the ‘patterns’ that may have driven them for many years, change their way of life. Although we sometimes hear of ‘miraculous’ or sudden shifts, more often than not, change is difficult and comes as a result of a combination and accumulation of factors over time. In many respects, once you have a clear goal of how you want to be, or of what you want to change, then it is a matter of making small and daily choices, of attempting to surround yourself with aspects of life that promote that change. If we do this, over time, change will inevitably happen – why would it not be otherwise?There is a traditional Native American story which illustrates this process beautifully. It is a story for many occasions. It goes something like this:A grandfather from the Cherokee Nation was talking with his grandson."A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy."It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves."One wolf is evil and ugly: He is anger, envy, war, greed, self-pity, sorrow, regret, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, selfishness and arrogance."The other wolf is beautiful and good: He is friendly, joyful, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, justice, fairness, empathy, generosity, true, compassion, gratitude, and deep vision."This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other human as well."The grandson paused in deep reflection because of what his grandfather had just said. Then he finally asked; "Oyee! Grandfather, which wolf will win?"The elder Cherokee quietly replied, "The wolf that you feed."(from www.firstpeople.us)

Mares73 Good-Luck Jo
  • replies: 7

Hi Jo your previous thread on going to hospital had 49 posts!! So I thought I'd start a new one for you to share all your nerves & for your many friends to wish you luck. Also I'd been trying to reply yo you all day but I'm having problems replying t... View more

Hi Jo your previous thread on going to hospital had 49 posts!! So I thought I'd start a new one for you to share all your nerves & for your many friends to wish you luck. Also I'd been trying to reply yo you all day but I'm having problems replying to people so looks like ipad is on way out. My husband said if I come up with the cheapest computer options-he would consider getting me one so I best get onto that. Jo I'd benervous and anxious if it was happening to me also. But I'd also be excited at getting a break from everything and just focussing on a chance to get heaps of support & learning new ways to cope with things. Yes your nervous but what you will experience, the rest & respite you will get being in charge of what you need will feel fantastic. You've needed something like this for ages & the fact it's near home is an added bonus. D And Jo -please stop worrying what they will think of you. It's a psychiatric hospital which means they talk to & spend all day with people just like us. And they know we're not "freaks"-we are simply people who have episodes of an illness that can have bouts just like herpes or diabetes or asthma can. And they know this and most staff will show compassion & extra support when you seem more out of sorts than usual. And can I say a week will fly-ill bet you wish you had of had 2 weeks at least. jo ill hope & pray I can be in contact regularly tomorrow. Are You going to take your computer or have a complete break? My love & thoughts are with you x Mares

Chris D Long Time no See
  • replies: 2

Hi All, Alot of things have been going on here for me, while in hospital. It has been quite challenging, hard, fustrating and very emotional at various times. Sorry i haven't been in touch, i have been quite hectic with trying to sort myself out. The... View more

Hi All, Alot of things have been going on here for me, while in hospital. It has been quite challenging, hard, fustrating and very emotional at various times. Sorry i haven't been in touch, i have been quite hectic with trying to sort myself out. The last couple of days, in particular today has been very disturbing, challenging and emotional.I will be in hospital for at least another week. To everyone out there who is suffering with a mental illenss or knows someone who has a mental illness there is hope and light at the end of tunnel. It takes alot of time, effort, tears, support and encouragement to get to see the light. I know it is hard and fustrating and you feel like there is no end in sight but i can assure you it does get better, sometimes it get's worse before it starts to get better. I wish everyone the best with their respective illnesses and the family members and friends of those people that things get better for you soon. Take Care Chris

Neil_1 Boosting of self-esteem
  • replies: 23

Hi good people of Beyond Blue; Without doubt a key factor that contributes to our mental health issues is the complete lack of self esteem that we have of ourselves. We consider ourselves of not being worthy, not being able to achieve tasks and compl... View more

Hi good people of Beyond Blue; Without doubt a key factor that contributes to our mental health issues is the complete lack of self esteem that we have of ourselves. We consider ourselves of not being worthy, not being able to achieve tasks and completely lacking in skills of life. There's possibly other things as well, but I'll stop at that. Also comparing ourselves to other people - I think that's a "no-no" of monumental proportion. Every one is different - everyone has their own personalities, traits and skills - but you know what, I bet everyone has their own issues and while we may see someone else as being: "popular, confident, seemingly doing well for themselves and perhaps even in a relationship or not" things don't always appear as they seem with that person - so don't compare yourself with others. Back to self-esteem. I was shown just recently an exercise where I had to get my age (and so this can be done by EVERYONE, because we all have an age) and divide your age into 3 sections. I'm 48; so mine was from: 0 - 16; 17 - 33 & 34 - 48 (something like that anyway) Each of these is a heading and then below that type up "dot points" for things that you achieved between those ages - and dear people, it can be anything - anything and everything. eg: 0-16: I'd learned to walk, talk, run, ride a bike, how to write, how to read, play different sports; I was quite successful as a cricketer, so I bang on a lot more about my cricketing achievements. 17-33: move from country town to city and find a job - and so earn money - more sporting achievements, etc etc. They aim for this is to produce 101 items (as a minimum). But hey, don't stress it if you can't - commence it; save it and go back to it. It's a "living" document - where it can be added to at any time in the future. Maybe by new achievements/successes or that you've remembered another achievement from your past. And then keep looking at it and going over it; over and over it and embed these images in your head. That you ARE a brilliant person, you are a SPECIAL person, that you HAVE achieved a massive amount in your life. For those wishing to extend yourself, I've actually just thought of a new column: for achievements that you'd like to accomplish in your future: that could be anything: like hitting a hole in one in golf, to finding that special man/woman in your life, to backing the trifecta in the Melbourne Cup; to seeing a Justin Beiber concert, to going on a holiday overseas. Anything dear people - the power is in your fingers to type away - the power is in your mind to produce these lists. GO FOR IT. Neil ps: I was totally kidding about the Justin Beiber comment! No "hate" responses please.

the_motorcycle_boy Recommended self-esteem book
  • replies: 0

Dear beyondblue, Not sure if I am using the proper channel here so please bear with me. I was wondering if I could recommend a book to you on Self Esteem that could be used as a resource for people online with Self-Esteem issues. I have had depressio... View more

Dear beyondblue, Not sure if I am using the proper channel here so please bear with me. I was wondering if I could recommend a book to you on Self Esteem that could be used as a resource for people online with Self-Esteem issues. I have had depression for many years and have used this book to help battle negativity and maintain, as far as possible, a healthy Self-Esteem. It has helped me enormously. As I read posts in your Online Forums I notice quite a few people have SE difficulties and when they write about these difficulties I can see myself as I was years ago, in great need and unaware. I feel like saying "Read This Book!" as I believe it could really help them a lot. Having low SE is a painful, awful place to be, especially when one is blaming oneself for their predicament. The book is clear, concise and very informative. It is written by professionals but is user friendly and can be utilized by individuals to empower themselves by increasing and maintaining their SE. I need to tell you the name of the book. The whole title is, Self-Esteem (Third Edition) A proven program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem by Matthew McKay & Patrick Fanning. Publisher - New Harbinger Publications ISBN: 1572241985 You can get the book at Fishpond (fishpond.com.au) I really hope the book can be of some use to the people at BB. Cheers Henry