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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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searchforananswer something that worked for me..
  • replies: 3

I have been suffering from depression for 7 years, its been a long and very hard journey for me. For the past 7 years, I have been searching for something that could cure me, I mean it was the thing that kept me going, HOPE. And so I tried so many di... View more

I have been suffering from depression for 7 years, its been a long and very hard journey for me. For the past 7 years, I have been searching for something that could cure me, I mean it was the thing that kept me going, HOPE. And so I tried so many different 'possible cures', from medications, hypnosis, supplements, counselling, and a bunch of other things, but nothing really worked. About 6 months ago, I tried this thing called 'foot detox', many say there are many health benefits I could get from it so I gave it a go. And to my amazement, I started to feel better after the first treatment, so i came back again to have more treatments and I could feel continuous health benefits from it. After that I bought my own machine which cost $100 from ebay and have been feeling better than ever. I finally getting out from depression and I am so excited about it !! but my question is, how does this machine help me from getting out of depression?Im searching for an answer, this machine works by transferring positive and negative ions in and out of my body, which eliminates the body waste and improves health, But personally I dont think I got better from depression because I got rid of the body waste. But rather its because the positive and negative ions that charges ur body (and brain).. i believe brain is like a battery, which is the source of power for the body. When u have a negative experience/ trauma, ur brain malfunctions and it causes depression. I think some parts of ur brain stop functioning and by transferring the positive and negative ions into ur body, the machine helps to stimulate ur brain cells and so it could work normally again. What I really want to know iss, has anyone else received benefits from this treatment? or will anyone willingly try this and tell me how they feel about it? I have been suffering from depression for a long time, and I hope that I can help people by sharing my experience. Cheers !

smallbear For anyone interested in a Mindfulness Support Group
  • replies: 1

My name's Ash and I'm interested in forming a group to discuss The Mindful Way Through Depression. Normally I don't have much time for books. I'm an author myself, so I tend to be pretty impatient with charlatanism and the industry in general.This is... View more

My name's Ash and I'm interested in forming a group to discuss The Mindful Way Through Depression. Normally I don't have much time for books. I'm an author myself, so I tend to be pretty impatient with charlatanism and the industry in general.This is the first thing that's ever helped me through my Depression. I think a lot of the charm has to do (as with most things) with the teacher(s). The message is straightforward, but the way it's presented finally brings all that disparate common sense we all know, together. I've just joined here. What I hope to achieve is an ongoing dialogue where those who are into the program in the book and its insights can support one another to stay on track and really, finally get well. Apart from my wife, I've never had any friends. So you'll have to excuse me if there's some extraordinary taboo about barging in here and announcing something like this. I've had Depression pretty much all my life. I've tried everything bar getting my brain fried. I've even tried mindfulness and self-compassion prior to finding this book, and they provided only mediocre results at best. You'll notice I haven't provided a link to the book, that's to, again, avoid any accusations of spam. I know that if you're as keen as I am, you'll look it up.

Beetle Things that pulled me away from the dark side.....
  • replies: 4

HI to all the lovely people here This will be just a short post. Just want to share my 5 cents what has helped me to get better....so far. I am diagnosed with MDD with and GAD and was close to end it all 4 month ago. -1.Going to ( good understanding)... View more

HI to all the lovely people here This will be just a short post. Just want to share my 5 cents what has helped me to get better....so far. I am diagnosed with MDD with and GAD and was close to end it all 4 month ago. -1.Going to ( good understanding) GP and fess up big time. -2. agreeing to meds and Councelling -3.stop/reduce alcohol -4. fight to get enough sleep, ME-time, -5. talk to friends how I feel not nessesary telling them about my depression/anxiety/suicidal thoughts -6.accepting my past ( sexual abuse by father, emotional & physical abuse by parents,emotional abuse by partner, physical abuse by stanger -7. accepting I suffer from MDD and GAD and that I need the meds to stay healthy. Not fighting the diagnosis. -8. accepting I will never be cured, but managed, and living with that reality as best as I can.. I don't know if that helps anyone, but it has helped me...so far.... All the best on your journey xox Beetle

MaryG I had a black dog video
  • replies: 7

A friend shared this on FB and I remember when my GP gave me this book to read. I was in a bit of a fuzz at the time and I wasn't quite ready to fully accept my reality. But now 4 months on I watch this and think yep that pretty well describes it. ht... View more

A friend shared this on FB and I remember when my GP gave me this book to read. I was in a bit of a fuzz at the time and I wasn't quite ready to fully accept my reality. But now 4 months on I watch this and think yep that pretty well describes it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiCrniLQGYc

Dot If only I could see inside my own head
  • replies: 12

I wish I could turn my eyes around and see inside my own head. Our eyes are always looking out. We see the rain, the sun, the beauty of nature, the people we love and those we don't know. We see the darkness, that fuzzy cloud that distorts our realit... View more

I wish I could turn my eyes around and see inside my own head. Our eyes are always looking out. We see the rain, the sun, the beauty of nature, the people we love and those we don't know. We see the darkness, that fuzzy cloud that distorts our reality and sends us retreating to that place in our head. Why do I wish I could turn my eyes around? I want to see and fix the bits that are broken. Pills don't work for me, I hate that disconnected feeling. I went to a psychologist once and they wanted me to scream at a chair - definitely not my thing. I have tried talking to family and friends but I get the feeling they just want me to 'get over it'. So here I am taking another step in my journey to 'get over it'. First a little background. I am female, I guess the name Dot gave that away, I am approaching 59, I work full time, I live alone and I have a fabulous son of 28. I am the 'chatty Cathy' at work, the one who is always positive and laughing, the one who notices when someone else is down and the one who is happy to offer a comforting word or a motherly hug. I am also the one who drips perspiration from my head everyday walking to work, the one who sees people looking at me in judgement, the one who hangs around the fringe of the work morning tea, the one who always says no to social events. Funny isn't it - I am sitting at home alone writing this and feeling anxious. Why? You can't see me. You won't know me if you passed me in the street. Yet somehow in my head I am never good enough, I won't measure up. Does that make me sad, yes sometimes it does. Does it make me angry, no not really. The truth is it makes me feel a great sense of disappointment and sometimes shame. Why did the 21 yr old who worked on our farm 'fiddle' with me when I was 12? Did that really happen or did I manifest that in some part of my broken mind? If it wasn't real why does it still haunt me. Why did my marriage fail? Why did my husband leave me to raise our son alone and unsupported only to come back when he was sick and dying of cancer? Why did I look after him, bury him and grieve for him? Why do I feel no connection to my sisters? Do they really care? Tried a few times to discuss my 'condition' with them and the first thing said is "....oh yes I have friend who's got that... do you want another glass of wine?" Ah no I don't want a glass of wine, what I really want is you to listen to me - pleeeaaasse! So next step is how do I fix me? I am pretty strong but it's getting a little harder to resist the temptation to run away from everything and everyone. So here I am embarking on project Dot - turning my eyes around and looking inside my own head to fix the bits that are broken. This year I have signed up for the 'World's Greatest Shave' - I figure that people are staring at me anyway, so I will shave my head (to a number 1) and give them a reason to look. This is a leap outside of my comfort zone but hopefully I will raise a little money to help others and that makes me feel good. Step 2 of project Dot is to sign up Beyond Blue to find tools and tips to help me in my journey and hopefully offer some help to others like me and let's face it even though we feel alone there are a whole lot of us out there. Step 3 - exercise more, eat better, stop using bad food as my drug if choice. Step 4 - study - in an attempt to fill some empty hours but also to gain traction and move towards accepting that I am a strong, capable person who does not need the validation of others to feel whole. Step 5 - to keep picking myself up when I fall down and I will fall down. Accepting that I will fall is a positive step, knowing how to pick myself up quicker is what I am striving for. I had my first depressive episode when I was 19, so I have been struggling with this for a long time. For me it is now about acceptance of my condition and not looking for the 'magic cure' but looking inside myself for ways to better manage my condition on a daily basis so I can lead a more socially connected life. At the moment if I did not have to work I would probably stay inside away from all human contact. So folks that's a, not so brief, post about me. Please feel free to have a chat and ask any questions or share any tips you may have for me. Cheers:-)

SeanA Getting Through Dark Days
  • replies: 2

I'm looking at the diary of the darkest period in my life. Page after page of negative thoughts, complaints and aggression. As the months have turned into years since these dark days, I look back at this time and it seems like a dream. I remember the... View more

I'm looking at the diary of the darkest period in my life. Page after page of negative thoughts, complaints and aggression. As the months have turned into years since these dark days, I look back at this time and it seems like a dream. I remember the feelings ... but that is about all. They are just a memory. A friend reached out to me recently and asked how I got through this time. You see, it's his turn now. He is struggling. This article is my effort to shine some light where there is none. To make sure others can follow advice that worked for me. But when it comes down to it, my Mother gave me the best advice. "Put one foot in front of the other," she said. Smart lady. Logic Through counselling, I looked at emotions from a logical point of view. I was asked to imagine that I firstly was a lawyer fighting for my opinion. Why I was right. Then I would list the reasons why I was entitled to feel that way. Then I would be the defence lawyer arguing why my assumptions were incorrect. Why I was not entitled to feel that way. Writing a journal. Writing a journal of your thoughts and feelings does two things. Firstly it allows you to get intrusive thoughts off your chest and onto paper. These thoughts often happen at inappropriate times. For example, when you are trying to sleep at night. I looked back at the diary of my worst days and looked at the times I wrote many of my posts. 2, 3, 4 and 5 AM in the morning. Putting these thoughts down on paper allowed me to go back to sleep. Even if I was only to wake up an hour later I would still write down what I was thinking. The second reason is that in the light of day, you look back at what you have written and can balance your emotions better. You realise that feelings are transitory. They rise and fall sometimes with a mind of their own. In my darkest days I seemed to only be experiencing lows. Then occasionally I would feel slightly better and record that. This helped me realise that if I could have one good period, then I could have more. "Don't do the things that cause you to get upset" I remember deciding on this. I traced why I was feeling negative and realised that sometimes the cause was something I had control over. I committed, if at all possible, to stop doing things that created negativity in my life. This is a lesson I learned that helped me pull through the darkest period. But as an unexpected benefit, I still use this mantra 10 years later. My experience of depression is behind me, but I realise that it is the small things we do on a daily basis that make a massive difference in our future. Small seemingly insignificant habits that reap a massive return years later. So there you go. Writing a journal, Logic and Not doing the things that cause you to be upset. I used these three techniques to get me through a period of time that seemed to go on forever. One more thing. A counsellor asked me at the end of that period why I had never done anything fatalistic. To end my life. My response was that I didn't think it was in my make up. But I suppose no one who takes that final step would say it is in their make up. One thing was that I have always wanted to leave a positive legacy as a result of my life. This intent allowed me to look into the future and see something worth working towards. In conclusion, I remember reading about a conversation between a student and a teacher. The student asked, "How will I know if I haven't achieved my life purpose? The teacher responded, "If you are still alive, your life mission is still in front of you".

Beck75 The truth about 2013
  • replies: 2

This year has been a million laughs a million loves and a million shattered pieces. I have become an aunti, a sister, a friend and a mother tenfold. I have gained brothers, nephews, sons and good, real, heart wrenching friends. I have flown around Au... View more

This year has been a million laughs a million loves and a million shattered pieces. I have become an aunti, a sister, a friend and a mother tenfold. I have gained brothers, nephews, sons and good, real, heart wrenching friends. I have flown around Australia and back again a dozen times. I have worked 60 hour weeks. I have clothed and fed refugee families and furnished their homes. I have clothed and fed my family and furnished our home. I have cleaned and scrubbed and sorted until I could hardly walk. I have held my breath and willed the cancer that threatened our lives not to show up again on each and every test my husband has gone through. And it has stayed away. I have seen a brand new Refugee baby born here in Melbourne. And I have fallen in love with her. I have loved harder and stronger than I have ever loved in my life. My family has been what they've always been and this in itself is more than I deserve. My friends have been patient, kind, drunk and there. I have been so high, strong and invincible I have conquered the world, whilst holding a laptop in one hand, stirring dinner with the other and solving problems with the blackberry on speaker parked on the bench close by. May have patted the dog with my foot too. Like I said - I have conquered the world. I have also lain in bed for weeks on end, willing each breath, putting every ounce of energy I have into a steady airflow, fearing lack of concentration would mean my lungs may refuse to inflate. I have fought demons, ghosts, dirty old men from my childhood. I have faced them head on and I have sometimes been able to scream in their faces 'f you' this is MY LIFE. Other times I have turned and ran and been left shaking huddled on the floor of the shower. I have lost loved ones. A loss I feel deep in my bones. I think of them daily and know I have to make the most of it. Make the most of it. This life. This amazing, wonderful, painful, glorious life. I am learning not to hide. This is me. This is all of me. Honesty and truth. Hardest to be to oneself when what you are is not always what you want. I have been hospitalised, marginalised, paralysed, analysed, medicated, placated, sedated, diagnosed, misdiagnosed, questioned, monitored, discussed, and considered a threat to myself.I have had daily visits from strangers qualified to report that I am still alive and kicking. I have been a burden. I have been a weight. I have heard stories, felt the pain and been given some sort of insight into life in a war zone.I have felt guilt over my blessed life and my haphazard inability/ability to be happy in the wake of this knowledge despite my privileged life. And yet I am still here. And right now I am happy and feeling loved.And I thank each and every one of you that made sure that happened. Each and every one of you. I have gained perspective. I have come to terms with bipolar. 2013, you were a hell of a year. I bid you farewell, and I thank you in kind. I'll take the loves and laughs and the meds, I'll glue the shattered pieces together, and I'll raise you another million loves and another million laughs in 2014. Bring it.

amamas EMOTIONAL PAIN
  • replies: 7

Hello fellow travellers How to deal with emotional pain in a healthy way? I don't know, do any of you? Cheers Amamas

Hello fellow travellers How to deal with emotional pain in a healthy way? I don't know, do any of you? Cheers Amamas

SeanA The What, The How and The Why
  • replies: 2

I originally wrote this article for my martial arts blog.It went around my head for quite few days as it relates to life in general so I have changed it to relate to us, our thoughts and our direction.The basic idea is that any human endeavour is dri... View more

I originally wrote this article for my martial arts blog.It went around my head for quite few days as it relates to life in general so I have changed it to relate to us, our thoughts and our direction.The basic idea is that any human endeavour is driven by three questions. What, How and Why.‘The What’ is about you. What you want.‘The How’ is about action taken by you to get what you want.‘The Why’ is about others. Your effect on the world.No real problem, or at least not yet.Here is the reason: You see, 99% of endeavour is about the What and the How.What do I want?I want a better job.I want a better car.I want to visit another country.I want more money.Easy to create this bucket list.‘The How’ is the action plan for achieving ‘The What’. It is your daily activity and how you achieve goals.The Internet is full of advice on how to achieve. Follow this plan, implement this system, get this result. And results usually follow even if you have to change the systems to suit you.But the result is still empty. That’s the reason for most entrepreneurs wanting more, bigger and faster. Sort of like a treadmill.The ‘Why’ is what’s missing. It’s usually only confronted later in life. Or after trauma. Questions like:“Why am I doing this?” “What is the reason I am here?”True purpose and meaning in life comes from a clear “Why.”The good thing is that a clear ‘Why’ makes the ‘What’ easier to define. With clarity comes ease of decision making. It’s easier to say no to time wasting activities that slowly bleed you dry. Finding your ‘Why’ is hard. No advice or process makes it easy. One way to start is to identify the things that you care about. The health and safety of you and your family must be a priority. But what about giving life meaning? It has nothing to do with the accumulation of wealth or how good looking you are. Or even how good you are at your sport.These are all fun and do give you a heightened sense of self in the short term. But internal struggles continue even if you are surrounded by wealth and success. The rich and famous get depressed as much as the majority (sometimes more).Now having said all of this, the urgency is not on ‘The Why’. You really can put it off. All you do is lose yourself in a flurry of activity and accumulation of stuff. The days and years roll by.But ‘The Why’ will become very important to you one day.One day you will stop in your tracks and contemplate ‘The Why’. This, I guarantee.Ready to start thinking?

Chris D Helping Eachother a Must Read Thread
  • replies: 14

Hi All, This is for anyone and everyone suffering or have been though a mental illness and whatever else people have gone through in the past. I thought of this last night while trying to get to sleep and in my head it sounded good,inspirational and ... View more

Hi All, This is for anyone and everyone suffering or have been though a mental illness and whatever else people have gone through in the past. I thought of this last night while trying to get to sleep and in my head it sounded good,inspirational and encouraging to help others in similar positions. I will try to remember it as best i can. Here i go: We have all been through bad periods in our own personal lives as we grow older, wiser and have a better understanding of life. Here we all are, so many people with so many different illnesses and so many different things that has happened to all of us in our lives. Together at Beyond Blue on this forum we come together to band as one. We stand side by side with eachother walking with eachother picking eachother up off the lush green paddock ground when we are feeling down, we will not leave anyone behind. Any obstacle that we come across we will band together as one and know it down as we all keep marching forward across this paddock towards the ray of light that we are all hgeading in the same direction for. To all going through a rough time at the moment, i say this: YOU ARE NOT ALONE, YOU NEVER HAVE BEEN AND NEVER WILL BE. TOGETHER WE BAND AS ONE, TOGETHER ON ONE CAN BRING US DOWN, TOGETHER WE WILL KNOCK DOWN ANY OBSTACLE WE COME ACROSS, WE WILL NOT LEAVE ANYONE BEHIND. TOGETHER WE STAND SIDE BY SIDE WITH EACHOTHER. To all members: STAND TALL, STAY STRONG AND BE DEFIANT TOGETHER WE WILL OVERCOME ALL OF OUR SUFFERING that has brought us all here to Beyond Blue. To Beyond Blue i say THANKYOU. I hope this msg inspires everyone to overcome their own personal challenges in their own lives. Kind Regards Chris