Support
Support

Relationship and family issues

Anything to do with managing relationships and family, including parenting, separation, loneliness, divorce, family and friendships.

Start a conversation

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

View the FAQ

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

View the guidelines
Categories
Start a conversation

Pinned discussions

BeyondBlue Hey there - read this to see what this section is all about
  • replies: 0

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a ... View more

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a negative way. As always, we want to hear your story and how it impacts you and encourage everyone to support each other with kindness. There are a few things to consider when posting in this section so we can all get the most out of it: Everyone’s situation is unique. We all do our best to share what is important in our story but we can never share it all. Let’s be mindful we can’t know all of everyone’s story. Anonymous but public. These posts are available to everyone and while the moderation team keeps the Forums anonymous, posts are still online for everyone to read. Have a think about what you want to share to get the best support for you. Please stay safe. This space is an amazing way to seek support from others who might understand what you are going through. We want to hear how you are going and what is happening for you. Please also consider 1800RESPECT if you don’t feel safe or 000 if you are in danger right now. You deserve to be safe. Thank you again for joining this conversation, your contributions are worthy and important to us here. Beyond Blue

All discussions

Start a conversation

Shar12345 I've reached my limit
  • replies: 2

I can do it anymore. I'm at single mum with a 16 yr old daughter at home and a 21 yr old that live with his dad.I work full-time and pick up any extra work I can. I'm going through divorce and financial separation.Mortgage, car issues, solicitors bil... View more

I can do it anymore. I'm at single mum with a 16 yr old daughter at home and a 21 yr old that live with his dad.I work full-time and pick up any extra work I can. I'm going through divorce and financial separation.Mortgage, car issues, solicitors bills blah blah. I'm burnt out.Today my daughter tells me she's been thinking out suicide. She tried last year. I've tried to get her help but she just won't take it. I don't know what to do anymore.I want her father to come get her but that will do absolutely nothing for her mental health.I can't do this anymore.

imdone Feeling helpless
  • replies: 9

I am a 52 year old women, married for 25 years. I'm going through peri menopause and it's really messing with me. Besides that, my husband, who I love very much, has just retired and thinks that gives him the green light to drink everyday, gamble and... View more

I am a 52 year old women, married for 25 years. I'm going through peri menopause and it's really messing with me. Besides that, my husband, who I love very much, has just retired and thinks that gives him the green light to drink everyday, gamble and now has taken to also smoking pot every night. It's medical pot, but whatever. I've tried to tell him how I feel about his drinking etc.. but he claims that he's doing nothing wrong. For context we have had major struggles our whole marriage with his drinking and gambling. I'm at a loss, I'm so unhappy at the moment, I feel deflated, everytime I mention anything it's a huge fight. I really don't know what to do, I feel so depressed.

Guest_07328851 Is this a normal situation and what’s right?
  • replies: 3

During wedding planning, there is both a pre-wedding/layliyeh/kina and the wedding. Of course there will be gifts at these events and usually it’s money in an envelope. Story: One of the couples mothers requests that she collects and takes the envelo... View more

During wedding planning, there is both a pre-wedding/layliyeh/kina and the wedding. Of course there will be gifts at these events and usually it’s money in an envelope. Story: One of the couples mothers requests that she collects and takes the envelopes for BOTH events, so the NEXT day the bride, groom and herself go through the envelope so she can ascertain who paid what to return any favours and see family friends input. The bride AND the groom, say they should take the envelopes and go through it together, and make a list of the names and what they gifted and provide it to the mother so she knows. It was insisted there is no need for that, and that they can go through them together the next day or upon return from the honey moon. Is this a matter for the bride and groom? Or is it a normal and/or cultural thing for the mother to do and request this. Should the bride and groom accept this. Look forward to your answers.

Mar777 Sexless relationship
  • replies: 4

We’ve been together for almost 9 years. He’s never been sex driven and at some point I stop trying as the rejection kept hurting my self esteem. It’s been more than 3 years without sex now. I’ve tried to talk about it and find a way to help but he re... View more

We’ve been together for almost 9 years. He’s never been sex driven and at some point I stop trying as the rejection kept hurting my self esteem. It’s been more than 3 years without sex now. I’ve tried to talk about it and find a way to help but he refuses to talk, he probably feels embarrassed. I have not had much experience in sex and I’m not very active myself but I would like to at least have sex once a month. I do love my partner (now fiancé) and our relationship is great apart from having zero sex. I do not want to make a decision based just on sex as it’s not the most important aspect for me but I do feel like I’m missing that part in my life. I’ve never been unfaithful because I’m too loyal or perhaps hasn’t had the opportunity. Sometimes I wish to meet someone that makes me feel desired. I would like to connect with someone in the same situation

Iamsky I don't know what to do about it
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I'm 12, in highschool and autistic. Same with my friend group. Yesterday two of my friends (Jacob and tanner) were fighting so I send them a long message and then left all group chats with them. This is the message: "And then you realise... View more

Hi everyone, I'm 12, in highschool and autistic. Same with my friend group. Yesterday two of my friends (Jacob and tanner) were fighting so I send them a long message and then left all group chats with them. This is the message: "And then you realise your lonely and Jacob was one of the only friends you had and regret it and become friends again. And then a month later you fight and this goes on forever and I always get caught in the middle as the therapist because I want to keep friends through high school and I fix your friendship with Jacob so often I'm ready to add it to my Callender to fix it. It honestly adds more to the weight I carry, trying to find a personality that everyone likes so that I can have friends and yk not be lonely and follow my high school plan that I made during the summer Hollidays this year. I am honestly getting tired of your stuff and I am honestly I am losing my give a stuffs and becoming someone I like but others don't know. Frick I don't even know what I like about myself anymore and honestly? I don't even know if anyone likes me so I'm always trying to read facial expressions but that's hard because I can't read people as easy as I read a book. So honestly? I might change everything about myself to be what I'm expected to be even though it'll depress me even more. You guys are best friends for 3 weeks and then it's a fight where you both come to me for advice and I honestly DONT GIVE A FRICKING STUFF ANYMORE." One of my other friends (still in primary school, doesn't know Jacob and tanner) replied with this when I sent her what I sent Jacob and tanner "Holy stuff, I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself if it was that bad and you've been botteling it up for that long then it's time you snapped. You did the right thing" I'm sorry for wasting your time on my stupid friendship drama but I just needed to get this out. Sorry -Sky

Scared Delicate Ego's
  • replies: 6

My family growing up my two brothers and Mother and I had low self esteem issues. When in my 30's I started the self help journey and thats how I found out about self esteem and thru that I was able to see this issue in others as well as myself. My d... View more

My family growing up my two brothers and Mother and I had low self esteem issues. When in my 30's I started the self help journey and thats how I found out about self esteem and thru that I was able to see this issue in others as well as myself. My dad and sister seemed to be immune from it.I learnt that people with low esteem were dangerous to me and i learnt to avoid.So I cannot believe I am once again at the mercy of a person whom has an ego and thru his ego building cuts me off invalidates me while I struggle to be a dinner guest at their house. I worked my guts out and suffered depression to get to this point in life. I am so angry that in his ego building was being a smart ass cutting me down is how I felt just to be the centre of attention again. I know the human psyche of an endangered ego and the lengths they will go to protecting it. The fact for me is he is an unhealthy toxic person for me to be around. My life has crashed as a result of this and Im angry this has been bought to me. There is no way the ego could accept my truth on him. Im angry while they lay around in luxury in their waterfrontage Sydney apartment at circular quay drinking coffee while I live in unhealthy scary dirty boarding room with people trying to break in. The worst thing is they have been helpful to me thru my depression and his wife who really is my friend is not going to take the news well by me saying Im never going to set foot in your apartment again.My attitude is this..... How dare you make me feel bad at your dinner last weekend because I have scraped on my belly for years thru depression and homelessness to get to this point and you think your going to throw that crap on me.Im trying to honour myself for what I have been thru but nit sure if zIm being unfair or arrogant. The only thing I know I am not comfortable going back there for more of that and my friend Em is going to freak out if I ever say that to her. I known Em for 20 years now but my mental health must come first.Does anyone have insight of anything Im not seeing because Im so hurt and angry and feel my life us not being validated

MaggiePie Adult child is a sex offender
  • replies: 3

My son is the oldest of 6 kids. He has always been very independent and not listened to much advice over the years, believing his way is better. He has adhd and is a compulsive liar. His own dad has next to nothing to do with him. He moved out for th... View more

My son is the oldest of 6 kids. He has always been very independent and not listened to much advice over the years, believing his way is better. He has adhd and is a compulsive liar. His own dad has next to nothing to do with him. He moved out for the first time when he was 18. Came back and left a few times after that. During one of the times he was moved out, he met a girl and got her pregnant. The mother has taken the baby away and we have no contact. He does it again. Falls for the wrong girl (nothing bad about her, just not right for each other), gets her pregnant and they break up. We also have zero contact with this baby. Not knowing my grandbabies is hard enough but after recent discoveries, I don’t know if I have now lost my son as well. For about 6 months, he was staying with a family friend and her 2 teenage girls. I said numerous times that he needs to get a place with people his own age. I was told repeatedly that it was working having him there to help. He was 22 by this stage. Then he moves out and one of the teenage girls accuses my son of sexual assualt . I instantly had my son’s support. Surely he wouldn’t do something like that. She is the same age as his little sister! Then he gets refused bail. Yes, I know this should have been a huge red flag but I still had a sliver of hope that he didn’t do it. Last week I get a call from a parole officer, who was so so kind to me, who explained exactly what has been going on. He is guilty. He is on the child sex offenders registry. I broke down. I have 5 kids under 18 in my house. He can’t come here again. I somehow have to tell my kids that they can’t have contact with their big brother. I have to somehow tell a select few family members (like my parents). I have to somehow figure out how to still have a relationship with someone whose actions I wholeheartedly disagree with yet I still love. He is my son. My first born, the one who changed me. I don’t know what to do or what to think. I don’t know how to handle this or how to move forward. I can’t stop crying. I haven’t heard from him directly in 6 weeks now. He has sentencing coming up in a few weeks and I don’t know if I can/should go. But I also know that if I don’t go, chances are I won’t find out the truth.

Guest_45495021 Why does betrayal have me feeling grief and loss?
  • replies: 3

My partner of 5 years left after being confronted with his repeated infidelity. He has since ghosted me. No apology, no explanation. The grief is overwhelming. I feel empty and lost. At 50, I thought he was my forever. I supported him through his dep... View more

My partner of 5 years left after being confronted with his repeated infidelity. He has since ghosted me. No apology, no explanation. The grief is overwhelming. I feel empty and lost. At 50, I thought he was my forever. I supported him through his depression, addictions and repeated cheating. He went from a high functioning scientist with a prestigious career, to a sex, drug and alcohol addict. He withdrew from friends and family and abandoned his career. He wouldn’t accept help. Even though his lying, deceit and betrayal worsened, I stayed. I loved him despite the toxicity. So why am I struggling with his absence? I can’t eat, can’t sleep. I feel so alone. I am grappling with the dread and shame. I experienced long term domestic violence with both of my first two husbands, and now this. Is there something wrong with me? Am I just unlucky? Cursed? Too caring, too empathetic? It just feels like the end of the world.

HoneyMilk Why can't my parents respect my decision to cut off my grandparents?
  • replies: 2

I am a 21-year-old F, and all my life, my grandparents on both sides of my family have made my life a living hell. For context, my parents have been together for 20 years, since I was born, the firstborn of three girls. Despite my utter hatred and in... View more

I am a 21-year-old F, and all my life, my grandparents on both sides of my family have made my life a living hell. For context, my parents have been together for 20 years, since I was born, the firstborn of three girls. Despite my utter hatred and inner turmoil I have over my grandparents, I love my parents completely; they are my world and understand me as no one else does. I often joke that my mum is my best friend, but I truly mean it. I've struggled with friendships in the past and still do, but my parents and siblings have been there for me no matter what and truly get me like no one ever has. I should also mention ive never had a boyfriend or even kissed a boy before, this seems unrelated but i promise you it is for later. As my mum often tells me, " this is why you dont have a boyfriend, because you cant even talk to your grandparents and treat them with respect." This honestly wrecked me far more than she knows, as not having a partner is a deep insecurity of mine. I made the decision to cut my grand parents off, from both my mothers and fathers side when I was 18, this isnt a decision i took lightly nor one i took in vain. It had been a gradual buildup of intense trauma and resentment over my entire childhood and teen life that led to this choice. I wish I could bring up specific memories that led to this choice, but due to the word limit and my brain not remembering or forcing myself to forget the trauma, I won't go into it. All you need to know is they are bad people from a different generation who have never taken the time to get to know me and expect the relationship to be completely one-sided. Even years after making this decision, I still have worries: " Did I make the right choice?" " Is this really for the best?" I cannot express how often I feel this, especially since all my University friends are close with their grandparents and constantly express how grateful they are to have them in their lives. I often lie when they are brought up in conversation, saying, " Oh yeah! I love them, they are so sweet." Just to brush it off - as it isn't worth going too into depth about it. Getting back on track now, my parents both wish I would talk with my grandparents more and hate my decision to cut them off. And by cutting them off, I mean not talking to them or seeing them ever again in my adult life, to me, they don't even exist - and I've made my peace with that. But they keep pushing me, and it's a constant argument with them; I just don't understand how I could make them see that what they are saying hurts me. I am an adult now and live on my own, provide my own income and sustain my lifestyle far away from my grandparents, so seeing them isn't a worry, only when we go on vacation. What im trying to get at here is, how do I tell my parents that I don't want to see my grandparents ever again? Without insulting their family or creating more arguments. I've probably left out some details, so feel free to ask in the comments, but im truly at an impasse here and feel lost like never before. Please, anything will help, Lord, help me.

Sharon Having trouble talking to my close sister
  • replies: 2

I’m very close to my sister almost like twins, and have also spoken to one another about everything. I have started to see someone I really like, we work together and we have been messaging one another, I didn’t tell my sister about my feelings and h... View more

I’m very close to my sister almost like twins, and have also spoken to one another about everything. I have started to see someone I really like, we work together and we have been messaging one another, I didn’t tell my sister about my feelings and have a hard time talking to her about him and what has been happening, we aren’t rushing in to anything as he has been in a relationship mid last year. I have really hurt her because she said I have lied to her and I have chosen him over her which I feel isn’t true. I have known him for over 10 years and looking back I think I have always had some kind of connection with him, I noticed last year more stronger feelings for him and didn’t say anything to him until end of march this year. He has been in a few relationships and even been married with grown kids. My sister is every worried that I will just cut myself off from family and friends to be with him, which I’m not and he hasn’t asked me to do that but every time she says something it’s “I’m only getting his side of everything, he can say what he wants to get you in, he always needs to be with someone, you don’t need saving” I just don’t know how to talk to her about it, I said that I hadn’t said anything because I was worried she would be judgemental and now she asks what else haven’t I told her about herself. The longer I don’t talk to her, the more I’m hurting her and that is the last thing I want to do. How do I explain things to her?

As an organisation that supports people from across Australia, Beyond Blue acknowledges the Traditional Owners and Custodians of Country and their continuing connection to land, waters and community. We pay respect to Elders past and present.

First Nations Peoples are advised that this website may include reference to and images of deceased persons.

Beyond Blue is committed to safe inclusive spaces, policies and services for people of LGBTIQ+ communities and their families.

Helpful information

Stay in touch

Sign up below for regular emails from Beyond Blue, filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones.

Stay in touch

Talk it through with us, we'll point you in the right direction.

Call 1300 224 636

24 hours / 7 days a week

Chat Online

24 hours / 7 days a week

Email us

Get a reply in 24 hours

Copyright � 2026 Beyond Blue Ltd

All rights reserved

Contact us Terms of use Privacy policy Site map