Hello BB faithful,I wasn't sure if this fell into my previous threads
categories and could not find an existing one, so started
afresh-apologies if this is supposed to fit somewhere else on the site
or I should have placed it in my existing threads.T...
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Hello BB faithful,I wasn't sure if this fell into my previous threads
categories and could not find an existing one, so started
afresh-apologies if this is supposed to fit somewhere else on the site
or I should have placed it in my existing threads.To cut to the chase
for those who have not read my previous posts; whilst on Counter
Terrorism deployment my team and I were seconds away from being blown to
smithereens by a diesel fuelled IED. The situation then compounded
itself by our team then having to witness the bad guys executing
children amongst others at point blank range, whilst laughing as they
fired single shots down their lines of victims. First off I should add,
all victims were bagged (black bags over their heads) the bad guys then
went down the line one by one firing a single shot above each victims
head and then kick them over - this was seen as hilarious fun. The bags
were promptly removed and then the true executions took place back down
the line finishing with the children - some I can only guess as old as
12 the rest probably younger. We, my team, agonisingly were in no
position to act to save any of these victims for various reasons I
cannot discuss.At the time I was a first time dad,my first deployment
away from my wife and then 9 month old baby girl. This I can only
imagine fuels my triggers. I am now a father of three beautiful children
and it has taken eight years for me to be finally diagnosed with PTSD. I
have been seeing a psychologist and have recently been referred by my GP
to see a psychiatrist. Sadly my first appointment is not until late Feb
2017. My triggers have been getting worse, the smell of diesel for
starters, children screaming, loud noises similar to explosions or
gunshots and I am way to protective over my children, when in reality
they are just doing what children do (on play equipment, running,
jumping etc...) Febuary seems so far away and whilst my GP has
prescribed some medication to help me sleep, I am still awakening with
horrid nightmares waking in a cold sweat and shaking. Added to all this
I am recovering from major surgery, so trying to balance treatment and
prioritise what needs attention first. I have received endless support
from many CCs thus far, but after what had started as being a better day
for me today went down hill rapidly after a significant unforeseen
double banger trigger event. I way out of character lashed out at my
children, much to their confusion and then quickly removed myself (cont)
PTSD for Medical and First Responders
