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PTSD and trauma

A space for discussing post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), domestic abuse, sexual abuse and other trauma. Please note some content may be distressing.

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Sophie_M If you need to talk about Bondi Beach - Our community is here
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, After the heartbreaking events at Bondi Beach on Sunday night, we know many people in our community may be feeling shaken, distressed, or unsure how to make sense of what has happened. Religious and political violence has no place is Aus... View more

Hi everyone, After the heartbreaking events at Bondi Beach on Sunday night, we know many people in our community may be feeling shaken, distressed, or unsure how to make sense of what has happened. Religious and political violence has no place is Australia and we extend our heartfelt condolences to the individuals and families affected by this tragedy. We wanted to create a space where you can share whatever you’re feeling - whether that’s fear, shock, grief, or anything else that has come up for you. If you need support from others in the community, please feel welcome to post here. Violence and acts of terror can bring feelings of shock, grief, profound sadness, anger and fear. It’s normal to experience these emotions while trying to make sense of distressing events. It may take time for these feelings to ease, but it’s never too early to seek support if you are feeling distressed. Beyond Blue is here for you anytime, by phone on 1300 224 636 or via webchat: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/talk-to-a-counsellor You can also support those around you by being available to them and listening. Thank you for being such an important part of this community, and for the kindness, honesty, and wisdom you continue to share with each other. We remind the community that Beyond Blue is here for all people in Australia, no matter what you believe, how you live or who you worship. Kind regards Sophie M

A_Tech PTSD for Medical and First Responders
  • replies: 276

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting t... View more

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting to others). Im a 40 year old female that has spent the last 10years in the State Trauma Hospital as an Anaesthetic Technician. My PTSD was brought about after years of exposure to shocking traumas, deaths, and no support from management. I would love to hear from anyone that has a similar story, or just wants to chat. Cheers

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Catie 08 Why do we need to label it?
  • replies: 2

I experienced abuse as a kid over many years and never spoke about it until I was in my 30's. Living most of my life without labels, it makes me cringe now when I hear people use the reference victim survivor. For me, it is unhelpful. How I feel can ... View more

I experienced abuse as a kid over many years and never spoke about it until I was in my 30's. Living most of my life without labels, it makes me cringe now when I hear people use the reference victim survivor. For me, it is unhelpful. How I feel can change from day to day. Sometimes I feel like a victim and other days I feel like a survivor but I find it more helpful to say that I experienced what I did. For me, it leaves room for me to grow, evolve and try and live my life the best I can. If I am told I'm a victim or survivor of something then that label sticks. And sure, we may well be a victim or a survivor of our past but I feel that it is so much harder to find ways to look towards a fresh chapter of life when we aren't given the chance to take our experiences with us, no matter how hurific the pain and how traumatic the experience, without the chance to choose for ourselves how we want to be seen. I don't hear of others feeling this way, and perhaps that's because the use of these labels in the media are so widely used and accepted, but I wondered what others who are being labelled feel about this?

user cptsd and fear
  • replies: 23

so i have cptsd and i wanna know if anyone else is living like this. i feel like no one is gonna reply but i am desperate. i am fearful and scared all the time. like fearful for my life all day and all life. i am no longer in 'danger' and do not stil... View more

so i have cptsd and i wanna know if anyone else is living like this. i feel like no one is gonna reply but i am desperate. i am fearful and scared all the time. like fearful for my life all day and all life. i am no longer in 'danger' and do not still live with my abusers but I still feel like I am unsafe. Its like being fearful of everything around me at all times. like even if no one is there, I am still looking behind me and chekcinhg everything all the time because I am scared. i also get really bad physical symptoms of the trauma, like vomiting and difficulty breathing. it is not just from time to time my heart is racing and i am scared - it is all the time. It does get worse when i have flashbacks etc but my constant state is fear. How am I supposed to live like this? is this just part of cptsd?

idk_123 ptsd and abuse- idk how to talk about it
  • replies: 2

hi this is my first time doing this. But my dad had many different mental health problems and when he refused to take his meds by the time i was 2 he changed completely, like he was a sweet man that didnt like conflict. then up one day he was apparen... View more

hi this is my first time doing this. But my dad had many different mental health problems and when he refused to take his meds by the time i was 2 he changed completely, like he was a sweet man that didnt like conflict. then up one day he was apparently in a state of psychosis. and i dont really understand different mental health terms but he was also schizophrenic and bi-polar. till i was about 7 my mum and baby sister and i lived through this and fast forward many years later i still get nightmares and i dont know how to handle a lot of the things in my life. my mum likes to bring up if we are in an argument that remind her of him and this hurts cause i remeber him as abusive and scary. i never know how to handle being told that. i guess i just want to know if anyone else gets what im saying?

xyz Loneliness is a powerful tool
  • replies: 1

Every morning I wake up knowing I have no one by my side. Every night I go to bed having been proved, yet again, that I have no one that cares for me. I see my kids, the only reason I am alive right now, and I know that they too will hate me one day ... View more

Every morning I wake up knowing I have no one by my side. Every night I go to bed having been proved, yet again, that I have no one that cares for me. I see my kids, the only reason I am alive right now, and I know that they too will hate me one day or get sick of me like all the others have. I have gotten really good at half truths because if they all knew who I really was they would all hate me too or worse, use me and then leave.Just like mumJust like dadJust like my sisterJust like my husband I live in a busy house, I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, I keep a job, I socialise all while knowing fully well that none of the people I interact with will have my back or fight for me when I need them to. They never have and they never will.

Alikyos How can I properly help my friend navigate their current situation with DID?
  • replies: 5

My long-distance best friend (known since high school) has been having a horrible time recently with lots of different situations merging and It seems to have become too much to deal with. I was only informed about his dissociative identity disorder ... View more

My long-distance best friend (known since high school) has been having a horrible time recently with lots of different situations merging and It seems to have become too much to deal with. I was only informed about his dissociative identity disorder earlier this year, and this has never happened before, or at least not to such an extent that I've noticed it/interacted with an alter (? I’m not actually sure if it's an alter this time around or a result of stress-induced amnesia as I don't want to pry). His condition has been somewhat inactive in terms of switching because if he had experienced switches before, it was not for long periods of time. I think it was more of an internal thing, but has suddenly become more severe. His ‘usual self’ is said to have gone dormant in a sense, due to the immense stress and lack of ability to process everything that is happening, and has been overtaken by a personality who has forgotten the details of the past year and lost passion for all his recent interests. Prior to this switch, he was EXTREMELY unstable, and I spent days trying to help him stay as calm as possible but the episodes were uncontrollable. Yesterday, there was a sudden change. He was being really incoherent and then asked who I was to him. He says he remembers me, but our other friends are blurry, he only recalls facts and not his feelings for them. He’s asking me all these questions about what happened in the lead-up so he can relay them to a psychologist he’s seeing next week. He's not cold towards me by any means, but there is a veil between us even though we're talking to each other easily. He's very analytical, trying to think through the things that occurred etc and taking notes. I’m just not sure if I'm approaching it correctly. I’m currently answering his questions and showing as much support as I can while trying to wrap my head around the shock of the whole situation. He says he doesn't know if the persona I'm familiar with will ever come back. I'm just clueless and lost at the moment, because he's my best friend and it hurts to see such a dramatic shift. Truthfully, I was slightly sceptical before this but the things we are talking about now would have caused endless arguments only a couple of days ago. Whatever happened, there is a tangible divide between who I'm talking to, and the friend I knew. Any advice is appreciated!

GreenGuy Things that live in my head rent free...
  • replies: 5

In summary:A lot of bad stuff happened in my life. Bad stuff is still happening. My upbringing and my attitude has turned me into a cynical, bitter man. I hate been this way. It would be liberating if all these thoughts, these memories would just dis... View more

In summary:A lot of bad stuff happened in my life. Bad stuff is still happening. My upbringing and my attitude has turned me into a cynical, bitter man. I hate been this way. It would be liberating if all these thoughts, these memories would just disappear. But I need to find some way to accept it and move on. To not beat myself myself up every time I'm forced to turn the other cheek, or feel like a coward for not having been more assertive in the past. I don't want to be an old man and still be seething about something that happened in school for crying out loud! If anyone could offer some advice, it would be greatly appreciated. Context:- I am a 27 year old male (in case that has any relevance)- Bullied almost every day from Kinder to Year 11. I was even belittled by some of my teachers. Dropped out of school for this reason.- Constantly ridiculed and then back-stabbed by most of my so called friends.- Spent my pre-teen years with a step-father who used to verbally abuse my mum. Almost became physical at one point.- Came out of school riddled with depression and anxiety. Was forced to take anti-depressants. Things can only improve now, right?- Nope- 2015, forced out of our old unit by a new neighbour who threatened to physically assault me, and used his sons to intimidate us in our own home. Police did nothing besides give them a talking to.- 2016-22, more neighborhood dramas transpire because Mum decided it would be a good idea to try and open up a dialogue with the next door neighbours about the noise they were making. It went about as well as I expected.- Numerous police call outs, verbal abuse, vandalism, vicious rumours and a narrowly avoided brawl later, things are marginally better now since next door finally moved out. We still get glares and remarks from a couple of those who still reside in the complex. I still have a beef with this guy who keep putting rubbish in our letter box and staring me down every time I go out to walk my dog. He is the bane of my existence, but there is nothing I can reasonably do except to tolerate his nonsense, unfortunately.

A_Tech PTSD for Medical and First Responders
  • replies: 276

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting t... View more

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting to others). Im a 40 year old female that has spent the last 10years in the State Trauma Hospital as an Anaesthetic Technician. My PTSD was brought about after years of exposure to shocking traumas, deaths, and no support from management. I would love to hear from anyone that has a similar story, or just wants to chat. Cheers

Keira Issues with extreme self criticism
  • replies: 2

Wasn’t sure what to list this under but I thought PTSD and trauma would be the closest thing since most of my thinking patterns have probably stemmed from that. It’s been a long time since I’ve written anything on here. I forgot this site existed for... View more

Wasn’t sure what to list this under but I thought PTSD and trauma would be the closest thing since most of my thinking patterns have probably stemmed from that. It’s been a long time since I’ve written anything on here. I forgot this site existed for a long time, I forgot about my account, until just now. For a long time I thought I was fine without therapy, that I didn’t need it now. It’s clear to me now though that I need serious help. The way I treat myself sometimes is abusive. Even I know that. When I make a mistake I feel the need to punish myself and have sometimes hurt myself. I hold myself to an impossibly high standard and it’s physically and mentally killing me. I’m pushing myself so hard at work I’ve been throwing up during shifts. I’ve been neglecting my basic human needs in the pursuit of money, going all day some days without any food or water when it is easily accessible to me. Yet I still don’t eat or drink enough. Am I self sabotaging? It wouldn’t be the first time. I don’t expect anyone to respond to this but I just needed to vent and some people close to me are worried about me and I wanted them to know I’m serious about trying to get help.

Guest_31864350 Cptsd
  • replies: 1

Hi,I have quite alot of trouble trying to believe people can think positively of me due to my abusive household growing up. It makes me so angry at points because im so convinced that my closest friends are thinking awful things about me, how im not ... View more

Hi,I have quite alot of trouble trying to believe people can think positively of me due to my abusive household growing up. It makes me so angry at points because im so convinced that my closest friends are thinking awful things about me, how im not special, that they like someone more than me therefore value them more, and it really impacts me. does anyone know anything that helps ease this feeling? i just for some reason find it so hard to shake, no matter how hard i want to believe people.

ABC01 Callout for Information Please
  • replies: 4

Dear All,I have been diagnosed with PTSD since May this year.I have hardly had any treatment for it and would like to ask people who have: What treatments are available in Australia for PTSD?andWho provides them to you? I have a psychologist and trea... View more

Dear All,I have been diagnosed with PTSD since May this year.I have hardly had any treatment for it and would like to ask people who have: What treatments are available in Australia for PTSD?andWho provides them to you? I have a psychologist and treating psychiatrist. We tend to address anxiety and depression first in our sessions.Much appreciated for any answers. ABC01