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A_Tech PTSD for Medical and First Responders
  • replies: 276

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting t... View more

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting to others). Im a 40 year old female that has spent the last 10years in the State Trauma Hospital as an Anaesthetic Technician. My PTSD was brought about after years of exposure to shocking traumas, deaths, and no support from management. I would love to hear from anyone that has a similar story, or just wants to chat. Cheers

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Koori_Col Getting to Know the Site
  • replies: 2

Hello All, This is my first 'post'. Thankfully it is not the 'Last Post' As a worker within Mental Health, I am not immune to MH issues. I am wanting to meet others and to refer clients to this site, as I feel it would be most beneficial to one and a... View more

Hello All, This is my first 'post'. Thankfully it is not the 'Last Post' As a worker within Mental Health, I am not immune to MH issues. I am wanting to meet others and to refer clients to this site, as I feel it would be most beneficial to one and all.

DarkMelody How do I explain that I think my trauma is PTSD?
  • replies: 6

I've recently started therapy again for the problems I have. It's not great at the moment, but I have hope that it will get better. Anyway, I was just wondering how I explain that I think my trauma problems are actually PTSD? I understand the differe... View more

I've recently started therapy again for the problems I have. It's not great at the moment, but I have hope that it will get better. Anyway, I was just wondering how I explain that I think my trauma problems are actually PTSD? I understand the difference between anxiety etc and PTSD but it's getting pretty extreme for me to deal with by myself. I don't want to bring it up and sound like I'm trying to diagnose myself, but I don't think I can get better if I don't see if this is the diagnosis.

ScarlettR I think I suffer from PTSD and am afraid of noises?
  • replies: 1

Ok, here's the thing - I am very sensitive to noise, and can not tolerate loud noises at all. I don't like revving motorcycles/ traffic in general (really, who does?) and screaming children. It puts me in a state of fear where my heart races, I shake... View more

Ok, here's the thing - I am very sensitive to noise, and can not tolerate loud noises at all. I don't like revving motorcycles/ traffic in general (really, who does?) and screaming children. It puts me in a state of fear where my heart races, I shake uncontrollably and I tend to retreat. In my childhood and teenagehood, I was exposed to a lot of loud noise whether I wanted it or not. Yelling teachers, screaming and out of control kids, etc. Now as an adult, I still hear loud noises I can not tolerate, like traffic. But recently I've thinking about it a lot and getting worried, and now everyday noises like making food gets me frightened and upset. For instance, today I accidently dropped a fork on a table while preparing lunch. While it wasn't excessively and unpleasantly loud, it startled me and I jumped, thinking the noise was going to escalate to something louder and Satan-like. I also have a sister who is autistic. She is prone to meltdowns every second day, and gets very loud in a frightening, heart jolting way. She also watches horror games that involves a lot of noise, and I think she picks up certain behaviours from them, even though she is an adult that shouldn't be so impressible. As a result, I think I may suffer from PTSD as a result of exposure to intentional loud noise directed at me. Now I'm getting fearful of everyday noises, and am so timid that I move awkwardly to avoid making even the most subtle of noise.

CKS Psychiatrist versus Psychologist
  • replies: 2

I have been seeing my psychiatrist for over 6 years. He is my rock. He knows how I feel, think and breathe. He is the third psychiatrist i have seen throughout my life. The first one was when I was 14 and the second when i was approximately 20. I am ... View more

I have been seeing my psychiatrist for over 6 years. He is my rock. He knows how I feel, think and breathe. He is the third psychiatrist i have seen throughout my life. The first one was when I was 14 and the second when i was approximately 20. I am now 58. In between i have seen a myriad of psychologists and counselors and unfortunately they never recognised me as having CPTSD. So i spent 38 years searching for answers but I never gave up. During the 38 years i developed an addiction to alcohol which brought my life and the lives of my family nothing but mayhem and sadness. I have always been honest about my drinking and as such I would discuss this with the counselors and psychologists. Despite my disclosure of a myriad of other behaviors and things (including severe depression) occurring in my life, they always determined alcohol as the cause for all of my problems. If I were to give up alcohol then all would be good! I'm not suggesting that any substance abuse is good, what I am saying is that it is not the cause. Because of my personal experience I wonder if psychologists are able to identify the cause of substance abuse and or the symptoms of complex disorders such as CPTSD, which I have. Please, I'm not bagging psychologists I am simply putting this out there for discussion. We must never give up!

Tardy Is it ok to ask my grown son to give me a safe place to stay for a while away from his father?
  • replies: 16

I’ve been married for more than 40 years. Our relationship is now toxic and I need to get out. My husband had pushed and persuaded me to move interstate and now I’m isolated from my family and friends. Up until then I was happy. I loved where I was l... View more

I’ve been married for more than 40 years. Our relationship is now toxic and I need to get out. My husband had pushed and persuaded me to move interstate and now I’m isolated from my family and friends. Up until then I was happy. I loved where I was living, my home was my sanctuary. I do like where I am now but can no longer live with my husband. My husband abuses me in the most strange way and that’s by getting me off guard and when I believe all is going really smoothly he’ll do the most hurtful things. But most distressingly, he’ll hurt me by not allowing me to heal or recover when I’m sick and where possible he’ll find a way to physically hurt me or cause pain. Eg. I was suffering from cluster headaches. OUCH! Also known as (suicide headaches) They’d start at 3am and he’d hold me as I struggle and cried. I became noise sensitive, loud sounds triggered an attack. Husband would use his industrial wipper snipper for hours and then his industrial leaf blower, when I finally caught his attention to stop he flew into a rage and told me his entitled to use his equipment as he wishes. He’d turn all the taps off incredible tight when my hands had flared up with arthritis . After diagnosed with fibromyalgia he’d convince me massage would help, these massages became so painful I’d scream and cry for him to stop, but he’d just laugh at me while drinking wine as he’s hurting me. I’d feel sick for hours after and was bruised so deeply that after showing a friend they were shocked and simply said, ‘that’s really dangerous’. When I’d asked him about this just recently he said: there must be something wrong with your body because I wasn’t pressing hard. And there’s many more similar incidents over the years. My family and friends simply don’t understand how bad my situation can be, to all he is or can be kind and charming. He also engages in other forms of ‘gaslighting’ leaving me so confused and bewildered I can hardly function. I have nowhere to go and I’m desperate to leave this madness. I’d like to know if it’s ok to ask my son to allow me to stay with him for a while as he lives alone? I don’t like the idea of painting a bad picture of his father to him and this is not my intention. I feel I need a safe place to think and heal. Right now my husband doing what he can to be nice helpful and involved with my decisions while I’m trying to work out where I’d want to purchase a new home and live.

CatchCat Really at a loss of what to do
  • replies: 4

Can’t figure out what I need to do in order to get a psychiatrist appointment to look for a diagnosis. I know I have trauma but I’m looking at specifically dissociative disorders because I deal with dissociation too often. Who do I look at? Who’s goo... View more

Can’t figure out what I need to do in order to get a psychiatrist appointment to look for a diagnosis. I know I have trauma but I’m looking at specifically dissociative disorders because I deal with dissociation too often. Who do I look at? Who’s good? Can I not have someone really expensive? Do they always have to be private (I have no insurance because if I look at that option I need to get in contact with my abusers and I don’t want that)? I’m in no immediate threat but really need the support. My girlfriend is feeling suicidal and I want to make sure I’m going to be ok if she ends up having an inpatient stay.

chitchat vulnerable and at a loss as what to do
  • replies: 3

hi Oh my how many times have i started to write a post and then deleted it.I have searched and searched and searched but as i am not an emergency or suicidal they try but can only give me 5.And i know what its like to be suicidal and be put on hold.S... View more

hi Oh my how many times have i started to write a post and then deleted it.I have searched and searched and searched but as i am not an emergency or suicidal they try but can only give me 5.And i know what its like to be suicidal and be put on hold.So if your reading this i actually got the courage to press enter.I dont know if anyone can help but i think i just need to talk . I have sat here most of the night frozen to my chair not knowing what to do and thinking that no its not right.Yesterday there was an incident at my house where people jumped my side fence and entered my adult daughters bedroom .i woke up with her screaming race out there and she was being held against the side of the house.Things got a bit messy .i rang the police and after they had our puppies in the car got told that it is not trespass if somebody jumps your fence enters your house and if they state that it is theirs its ok and then when my daughter said she would do the same then they laughed at her.I feel unsafe in my own house i can not find anyone that will give me an ear to vent i just am a mess i have rang the free legal advice and i still am unable to clarify if what the police said is true .So saying i am traumatised is an understatement If the police wont protect you who will

whenwewereyoung How to determine if past events did happen?
  • replies: 5

Hello, how is everyone? Hope you all are well. Currently, I am remembering some events from the past, however, I cannot confirm if it did or did not happen. Unfortunately, I have nobody I could verify with. Is there some form of effective therapy to ... View more

Hello, how is everyone? Hope you all are well. Currently, I am remembering some events from the past, however, I cannot confirm if it did or did not happen. Unfortunately, I have nobody I could verify with. Is there some form of effective therapy to determine if something did happen the way it happened? This is just my individual personal experience, and the things I remembered could perhaps have happened. Also, my apologies but I can't disclose what this is about but it is definitely a matter of did it or didn't it happen. Thank you so much and I hope you all have a nice day.

Bear1922 C-PTSD / PTSD Establishment of a long term relationship with father who molested me for a decade.
  • replies: 4

I’m interested in hearing anyone’s story of establishing a long term relationship with the person who sexually abused you. A renewed relationship with my own , Father, lasted for a protracted period of time (years). I made a well-intended yet inevita... View more

I’m interested in hearing anyone’s story of establishing a long term relationship with the person who sexually abused you. A renewed relationship with my own , Father, lasted for a protracted period of time (years). I made a well-intended yet inevitably doomed relationship with my sexual abuser. His impending death from cancer, heart issues & MND caused me a great deal of cognitive dissonance. I felt really sad for my father - the child molester. That happened earlier this year. Fast forward to now the relationship is terminated. My C-PTSD has emerged again after 27 years. The flashbacks, anxiety, OCD & depression have marred my year. The memories of the purely evil sexual abuse inflicted on me from the ages of 2 - 12 by my father have been devastating and crazy-making. I'll be very interested to hear from other victims of childhood sexual abuse who have established a relationship with their abuser. Warm Regards,

the_real_you The long road to recovery
  • replies: 8

After 30 years I found myself in the invidious position of having no choice but to admit to my wife that I was sexually abused as a child and I have to say that everything I dreaded about that moment in regards to her reaction turned out to be comple... View more

After 30 years I found myself in the invidious position of having no choice but to admit to my wife that I was sexually abused as a child and I have to say that everything I dreaded about that moment in regards to her reaction turned out to be completely false and nothing more than my own unrealistic and irrational fears as she was amazingly understanding and supportive. My wife is a psychologist and inadvertently forced my hand in the issue as she became convinced that I was no longer attracted to her due to the fact that she had gained a some weight when in fact it was my aversion towards intimacy that was the cause of this and even though I had never spoken to anyone about this, at least no one who believed me, I knew that I could not lose the love of my life over this and began a very difficult conversation with her that was highly emotional but also very liberating for us both. There is no profit in going into the details of the abuse itself but I will say that it was of the most severe kind and carried out over the course of several years, though intermittently as I was fortunate enough to not live in the same house as my abuser. At the time that it occurred I attempted to tell a teacher at school and also the librarian both of whom I believed would help me and the reason I believed this is because I had been removed from my home on several occasions due to unrelated physical abuse from a violent step father, however, their reaction to this information was to ignore it altogether which as a young child left me with the belief that this was something I was not supposed to be talking about and so I never spoke about it again. By the time I was old enough to realise that this was not the case I had pushed the experience so far down into the deepest recesses of my memory that I did not wish to dredge it up and as I had moved far away from my abuser and he was no longer a threat I felt it best to say nothing thinking that I could pretend that it never happened. Another reason that I remained silent was that I had often heard the theory that the abused go on to become abusers and I was scared that if I admitted what had happened that I would be seen as a potential predator myself and this further added weight to my decision to remain quiet. There is more to my story and the long shadow that abuse has cast over my adult life but I do not have the room for it in this post but I will continue to post in the hope that my story may help others.

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