I am 39, and my father has completely ruined my life. I am still stuck
living with him on a daily basis now that he has retired... I am
constantly fighting with him, I never feel at peace here and I'm stuck
with him controlling me on a daily basis, b...
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I am 39, and my father has completely ruined my life. I am still stuck
living with him on a daily basis now that he has retired... I am
constantly fighting with him, I never feel at peace here and I'm stuck
with him controlling me on a daily basis, but I have nowhere else to go
or I will be homeless and living on the street. I can't even get a job
now because my mental health is destroyed, suffering long-term anxiety
disorders and major depression and I am socially isolated. Things which
I am only now realising were largely caused by his selfish actions, and
not being allowed to have a life and grow as a person. I've also been
long-term unemployed now with no major skills or experience etc and feel
as though I am old now and my life has been completely wasted. I never
got to do anything I wanted to do in life!-He had to control everything
growing up, and still does today. He controls me, he controls my mother,
controlled my brother up until last year when he moved out with a friend
of his. But basically everything he does he has to be in CONTROL. And if
he doesn't get his own way with things he gets angry about it. Most of
the time, we always have to eat what he wants, go where he wants, do
what he wants. But other than that, he doesn't want me to go anywhere,
he doesn't want me to do anything, he doesn't want me to have money, he
doesn't want me to have a job. He just wants me to stay here for the
rest of my life and do nothing. But I am going absolutely nuts and I am
often snapping and yelling at him! Same with my mother. He doesn't want
my mother to go anywhere or have a life of her own. Treats her like a
domestic slave. He often wants to know where she goes, where she is etc,
and the same with me. I look at her a lot of days and it looks like
she's given up on life.-He basically kept us isolated growing up, and I
missed out on having a lot of experiences that would've helped me grow
as a person. We only ever went to the same places, did the same things
probably about once or twice a year. He never took us anywhere or did
anything with us as kids. He would go out and live his life and leave us
home. My cousins went everywhere, and did a lot of things with their
parents. They had a lot of things to talk about and found it easier to
make friends. My dad took off in the car and was never home, and
expected my mother to always stay home with us. But fortunately she
worked, as he would never share his money with her. As a result, I
barely had any friends growing up, always struggled to make and keep
friends, couldn't form healthy relationships. I would go to school and
we would have news day and the teacher would ask me what I did on the
weekend and I would say "nothing". I never got to do or experience a lot
of things that other people got to do and experience and missed out on A
LOT in my life, and a lot of stuff that I never got to learn. Having
autism doesn't help, as that isolated me even more and I was a regular
target for bullying.
PTSD for Medical and First Responders
