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BeyondBlue Welcome, read this if it's your first time here !
  • replies: 0

Hey there! This section is where you can find many of the longer conversations that are happening on the Forums. It is a special place for people who have been sharing and supporting each other for years. We know that our mental health can be a journ... View more

Hey there! This section is where you can find many of the longer conversations that are happening on the Forums. It is a special place for people who have been sharing and supporting each other for years. We know that our mental health can be a journey with ups and downs. Take a look through these longer conversations and you can see how supportive, validating and kind this community can be. It can be tricky to join an ongoing conversation but please feel free to contribute. You are the expert in what has worked for you and what you are living with. We want to hear about it, and these wonderful discussions are only ever richer for what you can add. There are a few tips for this section of the Forums that might be helpful Have a good read. These are long and in-depth conversations so before you step in, have a read of a few posts to get a sense of the space. It is not a great spot for New Topics. Replies are very welcome, but if you want to start something fresh try another section of the Forums. Thanks for your understanding, we want to hear what you think of these conversations and look forward to your contributions. Thanks Beyond Blue

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Unbeliever Is depression a natural reaction to an insane world?
  • replies: 253

This is a thought I have been pondering for a while. The default to view depression as "something wrong", or a "brain chemical imbalance" or as "a disease" or something that "needs to be fixed" or requires "medication" or "therapy" appears to be the ... View more

This is a thought I have been pondering for a while. The default to view depression as "something wrong", or a "brain chemical imbalance" or as "a disease" or something that "needs to be fixed" or requires "medication" or "therapy" appears to be the most common response of practically everyone. From doctors, to psychiatrists, to therapists, to the general population, to the depressed individuals themselves... the universal belief appears to be that "the person needs to get help". But what if... the living in depressed state is correct? What if it isn't an "imbalance" or isn't something "wrong"? What if being depressed is the only natural state to be in for an intelligent, empathetic, compassionate, informed, thinking individual to exist in the current state of our world? What if to NOT be depressed about is the true indication of mental sickness? I'm not saying that being depressed is fun in any way... most people on this forum would be well aware that it sucks. But that is not what I'm saying. What I mean is... could existing in a state of depression be completely natural for someone living in a place where so many things are obviously terrible... both on a personal level and in the world as a whole? My reasons for this perspective are numerous. Far too many to write in only 2500 words. But basically... The real world is an extremely depressing place for any person that cares at all about anything outside of themselves. Eg. If you care about animals... the reality is many beautiful species are already lost forever, many others are so close to the verge of extinction that even if everyone worldwide decided to do everything they could to save them... they would still be lost. At home there are people that still buy people animals as christmas gifts, refuse to desex their pets, the massive amount of pets put down in pounds annually. There is backyard animal cruelty, the dog racing industry using live bait, shooting race horses with legs, women's hormonal treatments for menapause, the meat industry, birds choking on our plastic half a world away, overfishing. The list goes on and on. It is reality and it is depressing. Care about animals and feeling "depressed" about it IS correct. And that is one tiny subject in a plethora of subjects. 3 billion people in starving poverty, the water wars, religious fanatics, corrupt governments, womens rights violations, slavery, wars, child rape, etc etc It's the people that are not depressed that worry me.

Canyoufeelit Hey I'm Dave
  • replies: 1

you can't get angry once you have died inside.. your mask becomes an emotionless zombie face.. and you should by now now how to pull yourself in and out of deep psychosis .. just remember with the loss of happiness , you lose anger and fear.. you can... View more

you can't get angry once you have died inside.. your mask becomes an emotionless zombie face.. and you should by now now how to pull yourself in and out of deep psychosis .. just remember with the loss of happiness , you lose anger and fear.. you can follow the psychosis deep ..once you can see what others only see in nightmares .and shrug it off . You see why some poor men and women can't keep fighting.. know one knows what's real...perception is each to there own.. maybe the doctor who tries to crack into your thoughts is the crazy one... He just doesn't know it.. .life is what U make it.. and I dropped mine, in the sand , then it got rained on and a dog shat on it!!. But somehow I fluked having an amazing son.. so I got backup to fight my demon's.and a reason for hope and the power that love gives. And I think that's life's golden nugget..

Guest_2412 Coping strategies for unrelenting anxiety
  • replies: 1

Hi I have been experiencing varying degrees of anxiety and grief for the past week months. Anxiety has been part of me for 20years.Normally it eases and goes away eventually. This time it is lingering and getting worse each day. My head is full of “n... View more

Hi I have been experiencing varying degrees of anxiety and grief for the past week months. Anxiety has been part of me for 20years.Normally it eases and goes away eventually. This time it is lingering and getting worse each day. My head is full of “noise” .. not a thought but a discomfort that I can’t shift - I think this must be “anxiety” .. I am a survivor of child abuse and neglect.. now in my 40s… I was wondering if others have found they need to adopt different strategies for anxiety over time - my ones of seeing friends, family, community and exercising aren’t working like they once did. Is this normal? What have others done if they’ve reached this point?

tmas Illness, malaise, and trying not to disappoint others
  • replies: 5

Long story short, I got long covid after my second bout 5 full moths ago. The experience of being sick was itself terrifying, I had a few days of being unable to move my limbs, sciatic pain, and for a day or two couldn't even speak and struggled to b... View more

Long story short, I got long covid after my second bout 5 full moths ago. The experience of being sick was itself terrifying, I had a few days of being unable to move my limbs, sciatic pain, and for a day or two couldn't even speak and struggled to breathe. I felt like I was wading through sand, and wasn't physically able to ask for help when I needed it. I just looked like I was sleeping it off from the outer. I honestly think I had some sort of post traumatic response to this, I'm still trying to move through it and it hasn't been a good last week or two. I'm over the worst of the debilitating fatigue, but I still have a host of weird bodily pains and symptoms that interfere with my daily life. My partner, who nursed me through the illness and is generally just the most beautiful person, had a lot of trouble understanding what fatigue is as he's never seen it before and didn't realise the extent of my illness because I'd hidden it. My problem is that when I feel malaise, I try to hide it to not be a burden. I've made progress unlearning this since moving in with my partner but it's hard wired. I start to observe him interacting with my behaviour, and the dissociated feeling eats at me. I feel like a disappointment. I try to push through and act fine, but he can obviously see through it and before we discussed this openly he interpreted the detachment as disinterest or withdrawal from him on my part. I have OCD, in my teens it was severe enough for several hospitalisations, something else that has followed me. I had health obsessions, complicated by the fact I have an autoimmune disease. I started having panic attacks again in the last few months, I was brushing off the "minor" ones but I had a full blown hyperventilating one a week ago after I got in my head about something and it terrified me. I have body pains that are pretty constant, but sometimes quite acute. Today my neck went into spasm so I couldn't join in with family - he was very worried obviously so I downplayed it, and then I could tell he was disappointed. He suggested just resting at their house, but I know my pain would have gotten worse if I tried to go. I don't know how to handle this feeling that I'm failing those I love when I'm so overwhelmed by the discomfort I constantly have moving through my body. Just looking for some wise words.

jaken 5 days after quitting cocaine
  • replies: 3

Hi everyone I’m new to this but thought I would share my journey . Never did any drugs up until 5 years ago when I turned 35 .Alcohol was a once a year thing and 2 glasses would have me dancing on tables. I was then introduced to coke . At first it w... View more

Hi everyone I’m new to this but thought I would share my journey . Never did any drugs up until 5 years ago when I turned 35 .Alcohol was a once a year thing and 2 glasses would have me dancing on tables. I was then introduced to coke . At first it was super casual and slowly progressed into every weekend . I would get excited just to do it . During the lockdowns it became far more frequent . Every Third day on average I would say . Last Monday I decided to flush the remainder and I’m now about to sleep and complete day 5 . I find myself getting irritable and somewhat anxious . I have thought about it a fair bit but I continue to remind myself about everything I hate about using it . All the thoughts I would feel afterwards etc I have delete the dealers numbers and blocked the contact as well . I started training again this week and I will say that my body is already feeling a lot better . I just wonder how long the cloudy image I have been seeings for the past five years will last ( if that makes sense ) does anyone have any tips for me and timelines of when I could be on top of this

bron198111 My son is in jail and I can’t stop crying
  • replies: 1

my son was arrested on the 20th dec 22 and was released on the 10th march 23 his then gf called the police on him she was trying to stab him and he grabbed her arms to restrain her a few months prior the police were called to an argument at my house ... View more

my son was arrested on the 20th dec 22 and was released on the 10th march 23 his then gf called the police on him she was trying to stab him and he grabbed her arms to restrain her a few months prior the police were called to an argument at my house where me and my son and other kids live they ended up doing an ivo which was never ever served on him he was done with 5 counts of breaching his ivo at his own house where she kept coming despite me continuously telling her to leave even a couple of times reported her to police stating this is his house and she won’t stay away and with ivo I always thought no contact goes both ways she tried to get the avo revoked whilst in jail and she is pregnant with his kid he was out 3 weeks and didn’t get angry he was the happiest he had been in years and getting along so well with everyone but this girl kept messaging the day he got out she told me to bring him there to get his things we didn’t go every day she is still messaging asking to borrow money etc or saying she needs helphe still didn’t then her and her bf started messaging him saying she is having a family with some one else thanks for giving me a baby and then he replied and not long after he was arrested and sent back to jail he’s been there for a week now and doesn’t go to court until the 3rd of may for a plea I was nearly beaten to death by a man and he got 9 months and my son is the one who helps me through my anxiety and depression he seen what we went through so he has been totally against hurting a woman ever anyway he is only 18 and he calls me crying because he is worried about me and wants to come home he has never raised a hand to hit her only grabbed her wrists to stop her punching the crap out of him I have cried a river I don’t no wat to do anyone have advice for

CW90 Need advice or help in supporting a friend
  • replies: 1

Hi there,My friend, M, is going through a divorce to his long term partner of over 10 years.As all things are, this is a complicated situation and myself, my partner and my other close friends are trying to support him as best we can but we are strug... View more

Hi there,My friend, M, is going through a divorce to his long term partner of over 10 years.As all things are, this is a complicated situation and myself, my partner and my other close friends are trying to support him as best we can but we are struggling to find ways to help/support.M is still very much in love with his ex, which we understand, but he acknowledges that the relationship was not a healthy one and that moving on was the right decision. He has admitted that for at least the last 3 years there had been no emotional or physical connection between one another.With that all said, he is struggling with his emotions and how to deal with them. We have and will continue to encourage him to seek professional mental health support but he deflects and says things like "I tried it and it didn't work or I know what I have to do or it is too expensive" He is very much of the mind set that men should not share their feelings, which myself and my friends group have slowly encouraged him to lower those walls over the last year but I feel he really needs some professional intervention. He is on anti-depressants (not sure those dose) and is also 'self-medicating' with alcohol on and off, which is a great concern.Last night he admitted to self-harm in the form of punching and also head butting his (brick) wall, I do not know how long this has been going on for or if this is a new development. He is also saying things like "you should hate me" and then proceeds to tell us that he has made unwanted advances on his ex-wife while in their relationship and when he has been drunk in the past has groped one of our other female friends. We aren't really sure how to handle this and are at a bit of a loss where to go from here.Myself, my partner and my friends talk to him as often as we can, we play video games with him whenever we are available and we also catch up in person, though less frequently.If there is any additional info needed I'm happy to provide it, but at this stage any help or advice would be greatly appreciated,CW

B3LL3 First Time User, Needing Help
  • replies: 15

Hello, I have taken the step last night to reach out to beyond blue and get the help I really need. It took a long time for me to get to this stage and needing to admit I need the help. I have so many pressing issues which has caused the pain I am in... View more

Hello, I have taken the step last night to reach out to beyond blue and get the help I really need. It took a long time for me to get to this stage and needing to admit I need the help. I have so many pressing issues which has caused the pain I am in today and not really sure the right place to go to. Would love to talk to anyone I can about stuff. Thankyou

quirkywords Do you second guess all your choices and decisions.9
  • replies: 3

I find I second guess all my decisions as I seem to have lost my confidence. if you can make decisions easily how do you do it. In my past I have made many poor decisions so I now second guess each one.

I find I second guess all my decisions as I seem to have lost my confidence. if you can make decisions easily how do you do it. In my past I have made many poor decisions so I now second guess each one.