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Do you second guess all your choices and decisions.9

quirkywords
Community Champion
Community Champion

I find I second guess all my decisions as I seem to have lost my confidence. 
if you can make decisions easily how do you do it.

 

In my past I have made many poor decisions so I now second guess each one. 

 

3 Replies 3

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Quirky,

Wish I knew too!

I've had one such just recently, about a support co-ordinator. Their email was so poorly written, I felt no confidence in them. After I met him, I feel better.

I've made some horrible decisions in my life. Fortunately, not dire.

I managed to get myself out of those situations, somehow. That's reassuring, now, to know I have been able to make the decisions that got me out & into a safer place.

The really good decisions I've made have not been quick. I am aware there is a process going on, sometimes it seems in the background of my mind, sometimes I am consciously reasoning my way to a decision. I might list 'pros' & 'cons'.

Also, now, I am thinking more about what is in my best interest. I have got to be clear on that, because I've neglected my needs for so long.

If I had kids in my care, I'd still have to think of me, because if I don't care for myself, how can I care for them?

I think there are times when what's in the best interest of a child must come first. I may suffer as a result of making a decision which is best for a child. I accept that, without reservation.

Because I don't have kids, I can't say at what age a child is no longer a child in my eyes, & when they are to understand they are responsible for their own decisions.

I still have to learn what I'm responsible for, as opposed to what another adult is responsible for. My decisions don't have to accomodate their needs - just mine.

We can only make decision based on the information we have. If you can ask lots of questions & gather more info you can make better decisions.

Since I can't become an expert in everything, I hope I can find someone who is, & ask them my questions. This is mostly about what things I want to buy, like deciding which Elliptical Cross Trainer to get, or a new computer system & accessories to go with it. This could easily apply to other purchases, of services, for example. 

Now, decisions about interpersonal relationships - I'm not on firm ground here at all. I only know I've worked out what some of the "absolutely no you don't" boundaries, & then no real decision needs be made, because I know then, I'm out of there asap! & no going back, either.

I'm thinking, if I have to 'tolerate' something, because 'they are so good most of the time', is that really in my best interest?

Want more?

mmMekitty

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Dear Quirky, mmMeKitty, readers/posters…

 

I also second guess just about every decision I make…it’s hard isn’t it…and very stressful trying to make the better decision…

 

Hugs,

Grandy..

Grandy. 
Isn’t it hard to make decisions when you second guess every discussion. 
Can you make a decision when you feel confident.