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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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guest75 everything i've done has been for NOTHING
  • replies: 3

Everything i've done over the passed month has been for nothing Everything i've done to try and improve myself, for nothing It was all for her - I NEED her in my life, not want, NEED...I've been trying to become a better person, im fighting what is a... View more

Everything i've done over the passed month has been for nothing Everything i've done to try and improve myself, for nothing It was all for her - I NEED her in my life, not want, NEED...I've been trying to become a better person, im fighting what is apparently a losing battle alone, i had summoned enough strength in myself to get thru until the 21st, but what then? I dont have the strength to keep going much longer

Jo3 can someone talk to me pls
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone I need to talk to someone. I am feeling panicky, emotional and not with it. Hope someone can come on and chat with me. Jo

Hi everyone I need to talk to someone. I am feeling panicky, emotional and not with it. Hope someone can come on and chat with me. Jo

bCalm How do I help loved one?
  • replies: 6

Hi all, I am after any good advice. My grilfriend who is usually positive and motivated is in a rough patch. She is out of work and struggling financially. I unfortunately have been through the same deal but have managed to land some work now and am ... View more

Hi all, I am after any good advice. My grilfriend who is usually positive and motivated is in a rough patch. She is out of work and struggling financially. I unfortunately have been through the same deal but have managed to land some work now and am starting to recover financially. However I am limited in what I can do for her financially still, and to make matters worse we live interstate to each other, we try and catch up every couple of weeks around mainly my off week for my kids visit times. She has been down for some time, but is getting worse. I have been through previous down times with her due to death in the family or work stress, and I believe I am a good listener and have some understanding of her feelings. She is not scared of talking to professionals and has been to counselling in the past but not yet in this case. She has been to her doctor and he has prescribed an antidepressant. She has never been on medicine during our time together, so I am anxious about this. She has been on this for 2-3 weeks and is now constantly tired, is still down, not able to see light at end of tunnel and hard to talk to, very emotional, easily upset, crying, I think even borderline statements about suicide a couple of times, such as "I just want to go to sleep and not wake up". Its really hard to feel like I'm helping at all from the other end of the phone. I'm just listening, comforting and encouraging as best as I can. Her regular doctor is away for a couple more weeks, but I think she needs to get the medication reviewed and start seeing a counsellor asap. I might be able to get some friends to drop into her a little too. Not sure, what do you experienced or qualified people think? Any advice?

iusedtobefamous Scared.
  • replies: 2

I don't know what to do. I suffered pretty badly from severe depression and anxiety when i was a teenager (12-18, literally the whole time I was a teenager). I'm 21 now, and I honestly thought I was better. But lately, I don't know, I've been really ... View more

I don't know what to do. I suffered pretty badly from severe depression and anxiety when i was a teenager (12-18, literally the whole time I was a teenager). I'm 21 now, and I honestly thought I was better. But lately, I don't know, I've been really struggling, and It's honestly scaring the crap out of me. I had to quit my job because a guy there was being an arse to me, and it got to the point where I just couldn't go in there. I was standing in the car park having a full on panic attack because his car was there, and I literally just turned and ran away. I spent the rest of that day crying in bed, I just felt so pathetic. Like, if i was any regular kind of person, I'd be able to deal with it or something. I don't know. It's just that I haven't felt like this in years. I didn't realize it was still a risk. I don't want to hurt myself, I was so proud of myself for stopping that, but I'm having those urges again, and it's really scaring me, and I don't know how strong my willpower to not do it is, and I made an appointment to see my psychologist, but she's away til the 21st, and that just seems like so far away. I don't feel like I can talk to my family about how I'm feeling (I still live at home), I just feel like I've put them through so much already, and it would be so unfair especially on my mum to make her have to start worrying about me like that again. I'm just really scared, and worried, and I feel so alone, and useless and pathetic. I'm home alone all day today, and I'm really worried about how I'm going to try to distract myself from feeling like I want to hurt myself. 'beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.'

guest75 im losing the will to fight on
  • replies: 26

ive had my kids the last 2 days. it made me happy today my daughter hugged me and told me i was "the best dad she'd ever had" to which i replied "im the only dad youve ever had" and she says "nuh uh mummy has a new boyfriend" i litterally felt my hea... View more

ive had my kids the last 2 days. it made me happy today my daughter hugged me and told me i was "the best dad she'd ever had" to which i replied "im the only dad youve ever had" and she says "nuh uh mummy has a new boyfriend" i litterally felt my heart break in 2, a tear welled up in my eye and i could feel my will to keep fighting, to keep on going sliding away she told me she was joking but its left me feeling like an empty shell and i dont know if i want to keep on fighting add to that im currently being forced to live with my mother (i have no other options) and i just feel like a huge burden on her and my sister and really get the feeling i am not wanted i just want to give up

Teddas Going off line
  • replies: 2

Hi all, am just posting this to say am going to disappear from posting for a little while. I know how caring people are on here and don't want people worrying. To be honest l am just spent, so tired of feeling like this. I suppose not sleeping since ... View more

Hi all, am just posting this to say am going to disappear from posting for a little while. I know how caring people are on here and don't want people worrying. To be honest l am just spent, so tired of feeling like this. I suppose not sleeping since Saturday night isn't helping but all l can say is l'm exhausted. Was sitting last night watching my 15yo daughter and 11yo son playing Xbox with my 'wife' sitting in a different room ignoring me ( well us l suppose ). Video games bore me so started cleaning old photos off my phone. Found some pics of the friend that now hates me. Nothing rude, just her blowing me a kiss etc. Started me on a downward spin. Started thinking the last time we were together was at a work friends wedding. We were invited as a cpl but it was a shocking night. Put my arm around her and she pushed it off, tried to hold her hand and she pulled away, wouldn't even dance with me. When we got home she put pillow and doona on the couch. By the time these memories had come flooding but l was sitting there in tears. Got up and went to bed but got worse. Lay there thinking if the two women l have had real feelings for in the past 22 years now think l am worthless maybe they are right. Tried thinking of my kids but that didn't help. Have a 20yo in Qld at uni that will never come home again because he can't handle the tension, l said l would fix it but can't so that's my fault. A 19yo who just puts his hand out and his mother gives him money, l can't make home see how he should act to be a good man. 15yo girl who won't speak with her mother and 11yo autistic son who only has one problem left. That is can't control his bowels and because l can't get myself together l keep forgetting his medicine. All feels like my fault. Lay in bed all night staring at the ceiling wondering what l have done wrong. If God only gives you what you can handle he must think l'm Hercules, and l'm not. I am sick of this feeling. I hate feeling alone and dont cope with it. I know there are people who care but the ones l want to don't or in my mother's case have passed away. I Don't get embarrassed about crying because do it so often, am while trying to type this. 10 years ago l would wake up and think away we go, take on the world. 5 years ago l would think, oh no here we go again.Now l wake and think bugger l woke up ! I talk to friends but seem to say the same thing over and over. Am stuck in this crappy circle but somehow get worse. I dont know how to stop it. Stop caring for the friend l saw a future with, the wife who obviously doesn't see anything there now. Feel like l just let everyone down. Sounds self indulgent but l use to be the person people looked up to, great marriage, great kids, always there to help and always having a laugh. God l miss that time and feel l am letting down all those people. I will be back on here soon l hope but if this is not rock bottom l hate to think it can get worse. Again l feel now l am letting you all down to. You are all stronger than you think at the moment, and can see from what l read you all learning and leaning on each other. Keep working on the baby steps and you can achieve things. Good luck xx

REnigmaK I'm so over life
  • replies: 2

I'm sick of this thing called life. I have done so much for my family over the years and all I have in return is a resume that won't get me a job. I haven't been in a relationship for years and can't find anyone who is actually interested in me. I'm ... View more

I'm sick of this thing called life. I have done so much for my family over the years and all I have in return is a resume that won't get me a job. I haven't been in a relationship for years and can't find anyone who is actually interested in me. I'm 30 and don't have children, medically unable to and yet in my culture it is extremely important for women to have children. I see everyone around me settling down with partners, having children, good jobs, a house and car. I have none of that and it pushes me further down into the depression hole. I have the kind of family that won't let go of me, allow me to establish my life, every time I try and get away, they pull me back into their toxic web. There is no longer a reason for my living except being their slave.

guest75 FINALLY some good(ish) news
  • replies: 2

Hi Guys, Today i arrived home from work and my mum tells me there is a letter on the bench for me. I go to the bench and see a letter with "DHS" on it. I immediately start to panic. I open the letter and it is informing me that DHS Child Protection w... View more

Hi Guys, Today i arrived home from work and my mum tells me there is a letter on the bench for me. I go to the bench and see a letter with "DHS" on it. I immediately start to panic. I open the letter and it is informing me that DHS Child Protection will no longer have anything to do with my family Surely that is a good thing, that the magistrate will take into account? Im finally starting to see some light at the end of this long dark tunnel. Finally, am i starting to get some small results from the work i have been doing? But then my pessimistic side decided to chime in. She told my mum DHS made her take out the IVO. DHS are no longer concerned, and she hasnt retracted it. What does that mean? that she really doesnt want anything to do with me anymore? My pessimistic side is annoying Matty

yeti Concerned, need advice and direction
  • replies: 3

Hi, I'm really glad I found this site/forum; from what I've read it is full of intelligent people with experience to share. At the moment I'm really concerned about my partner, and what action (if any) I should take. We've been together for about 4 y... View more

Hi, I'm really glad I found this site/forum; from what I've read it is full of intelligent people with experience to share. At the moment I'm really concerned about my partner, and what action (if any) I should take. We've been together for about 4 years and over the last 2 years she has been working in the mines, 5 weeks on, 1 week off. While we've done all we can, over the last 6 months things have been really flat in our relationship. She seems distant and displaced when shes home, and seems to have no interest in our relationship anymore; that she doesn't know who she is anymore and needs time alone. She already works in an isolated environment, I'm concerned more time alone isn't a good thing... I don't know if I should try and confront her about everything and bring it all to the table. She wakes up saying that there is no motivation to do anything and has no self-worth. While I think this depression has come up from the isolation of work, I also think there are some deeper issues with her family and childhood that exist. I really don't know the best course of action to take here, I'm genuinely worried, and want to do all I can. I really appreciate any advice or information anyone can refer. Thanks

lost_and_depressed I have lost my way
  • replies: 4

Like so many threads I have read, I am also new to this.I have so many things going wrong in my life, am not sure where to start. I know not as bad as some, but from my position I am sinking fast.I am a 36 yo male. married with 2 kids.I have suffered... View more

Like so many threads I have read, I am also new to this.I have so many things going wrong in my life, am not sure where to start. I know not as bad as some, but from my position I am sinking fast.I am a 36 yo male. married with 2 kids.I have suffered with depression for many years, I only recently realised this when I lost my job and went to counselling. I have been on medication for the past year, I have been on multiple types, but I feel nothing seems to be working. I have tried multiple counselors and psychologists and psychiatrists and GP's but feel that they are not listening to me, with some of them I am scared to say how I really feel as I am scared of being admitted to a Psych ward and loosing my job and family.I have a terrible blackness that follows me around, I can never seem to fully shake it and i always see the worst in people and myself. I know realise I have had this for many years but never new what it was and just thought everyone felt the way I did.I constantly think of committing suicide and have a couple of very detailed plans and have made a couple of attempts. When I have my worst days, about once a week, this seems like the most sensible and logical decision.I have always thought that I was a caring person and looked out for others especially those close to me. I have recently developed an uncontrollable rage and anger for the majority of instances I can not actually tell you what sets me off, but I go completely off the handle bars!my poor wife and kids have seen to much and she is threatening to leave me, which gets me angry. i have not hurt her or the kids and never would, when i calm down and reflect i think of what they witnessed i am ashamed. I do not know how to control it or where it came from or more so how to get rid of it.Any thoughts on finding my way or dealing with my anger would be greatly appreciatedAs I could not bear the thought of loosing my wife and kids, they are everything to me.beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.